MIDDLE-AGED WOMEN 40-60ish
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hmmmmm, my everything out hysterectomy was in '98-I too was never given any idea that twisted intestines might be an after effect-here's hoping your SIL was just 1 in a billion mjb!
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I've been off the site for quite a while and signed back on to ask a question. What do I see, but a very strange looking bike. Definitely will check out the PedalPub. Why have I not been keeping up?
My questions, fellow middle-aged women, is about birth control. I'm 51, single, and on tamoxifen. I find myself in a place I never imagined being -- having to figure out birth control after decades of not needing it (my ex had a vasectomy) and being on tamoxifen. My oncologist recommended a barrier method -- IUD, diaphragm, condoms. Now, I'm not so out of it that I don't know what these are. I'm guessing condoms haven't changed much, pretty basic technology there. I'm wondering if any of you have recently faced this issue? What was recommended? Any pros or cons to an IUD or diaphragm I should be aware of? Any alternatives? IUD would probably be rather short-term since I do seem to be winding down on the periods. Haven't had one in 3 months, but not willing to gamble with pregnancy at this point in life. I'd appreciate any input. Thank you!
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CandyB, I'm not going to inquire, but IF you are having sex A LOT, the IUD is a consideration...it's always in place. I tried an IUD for some months but it made my periods VERY heavy (to the point where I could go thru' a "Hinden-tampon"(*) in about 20 min. This does not happen to every woman, I'm just lucky, I guess. If you don't have any sensitivities (latex, spermacides) the condom or diaph. methods are easy enough, and like you said, it won't be too many months/years of use anyway.
(*) Coined by our buddy Kleenex.
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Candy, take it from a woman who got pregnant while using the diaphragm, you have to be very aware of using it and correctly. It isn't spontaneous either. I lost weight (Yes, your girly parts lose weight, too) and scheduled an appt. to re-fit mine, and while waiting for the appt. lo and behold...
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mjbmiller, glad to hear your SIL is getting better.. CANDY, i have no answers, but i think its' WONDERFUL that you are having to ask the question!!!hahah 3jays
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Well, I'll drink to 3jays post...Candy-congrats!
I had a nasty Dalkon Shield in my 20s which put an end to my ever needing birth control so the mere mention of IUD puts me into sweats! I think that if your partner is in tune to you that the condom method would be a good way to go-like you said you might not to be even pursuing it much longer! Would he be willing to do something more permanent on himself?
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I used to have a cervical cap, but I'm not sure how widely available they are in the US. I got mine as part of a clinical trial. It has advantages over a diaphragm - it's smaller, can be left in place several days at a time, and doesn't need to be refitted with weight changes.
Later I had a tubal ligation, and that's a good permanent solution, but probably more than you want to undergo if you're perimenopausal.
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Sorry to be blunt, but if you're having sex with someone and it's not his first time, USE A CONDOM due to sexually transmitted diseases!!! We didn't have to worry about that as much as the kids have to now a days!! Just do it!
E, why "hinden tampon"????
mjb, I just told my DH about that possibility yesterday!! What happened to your SIL in the first place? I forget... I have some weird pelvic pains and started thinking...and then you post this!! Thank God they found out the problem, but what did it start as?
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Barbe, meant to invoke a zeppelin-sized tampon. The Hindenburg.
Not to be confused with a Led Zeppelin album cover.
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Barb it started as a bowel obstruction that caused her to have pains and backup in her system. She is now in a room and out of ICU.
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I must have sensed that I was being quoted!
Tamoxifen and IUD's are mutually exclusive - you can't use an IUD if you're on Tamoxifen. Something to do with the excitability of uterine tissue with the Tamoxifen. My gynecologist, who sweetly seems to think that somewhere in the midst of random discharge, pelvic discomfort, lengthy menstrual tsunamis* and mood swings I'm actually having sex, highly recommends something permanent, like tubal ligation. One of Tamoxifen's treats is that it can enhance fertility, which is a very bad thing in this case. He thought condoms were okay short term (I'm with Barbe - if this is a new person, please use one - there's been a HUGE increase in STD's in our age range due to people being "back in the game" and not using appropriate protection), but really suggested something serious if we're done having children, which we are. Anyway - you should ask your gynecologist - make sure he/she knows about the Tamoxifen and the new partner.
Just popped in - I missed pages and pages and pages, but I've been busy and don't have time to catch up. Lots of new voices! Glad to see bonding is still heavily in process!
* menstrual tsunami - ridiculously heavy period - term stolen from Elimar!!!!
Coleen
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{{{{{{{{Kleenex}}}}}}}}
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Good catch, Kleenex! I did not even know that the IUD was a no-no for Tamoxifen takers. My experience was before I embarked on the Tamoxi-Train.
OMG, Eph! I forgot about the Dalkon Shield! It was long gone by the time I attempted that method. That was a pretty big scandal at the time (and a big class-action lawsuit, also.) So many women were senslessly victimized. You belong to another huge club nobody wanted to join.
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DH bought me ginger to add to tea or put in hot water and drink like tea during chemo and I could not stand the taste....have not had anything ginger since then.....the bottle is still in my frig....wonder if after 5 years its any good....not that I want it!!!!
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Hello Ladies I just found this forum, I am in the 40-60ish category or should I say that I am going to be 51 years old in June. After what I have gone through since first being dx with breast cancer in all honesty I sometimes feel much older.
It is just over 13 months since finishing chemotherapy and nearly a year since finishing radiation therapy and am now on Tamoxifen for 5 years. You know sometimes it feels like just yesterday that I was going through these treatments.
Now I am suffering with 'frozen shoulder', and have brough this to both the attention of my MO and Radiation Oncologist of whom both say that it is not the result of radiation therapy, and even saw my breast surgeon today and he did not make much of it.... so am stumped grrrr I first started to notice that I had problem with my right shoulder/arm in September, but it did not get really bad until November....
But as my husband keeps telling me, life has got to go on... I have been trying to pick up my life again...
Guess just waiting for the good weather to come around, will then be more in the spirit of things.
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charmaine I know I have seen you on another thread and may have already said this to you. but have you googled RIF (radiation induced fribrosisi) form what I have read it usually effects you 12-18 months after radiation sometimes much sooner and is missed diagnoses alot. Check it out and see if the symptoms match yours.
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Charmainejensenvoisine-the "cause" of frozen shoulder is lack of use of the shoulder joint. We have lots of reasons for limiting the use of a shoulder, pain after lumpectomy, especially with SNB or axillary node dissection. Radiation does affect the muscle under the breast that is involved with shoulder movement and adds to the problem. In the long run it does not matter which treatment "caused" the problem, you need one of them to give you a referral to a physical therapist. The docs work FOR you, so pick one and tell them you need a PT referral and persist until you get one. Frozen shoulder can be reversed with PT. My brother went through that a few years back. It took some time and work, but he now has full range of motion and is bowling competitively again. The sooner you get into PT the quicker the problem can be reversed. I was on the road to a frozen shoulder due to the damage to the muscle, one PT visit gave me the stretches and exercises I needed to stop the problem in it's tracks. The Rad Onc adamantly stated that radiation does not cause any side effects except a "sunburn like" skin reaction-hah. My Med Onc referred me to PT for lymphedema and frozen shoulder prevention. IMHO Rad Oncs are jack a$$es, see your primary provider and get a referral.
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Welcome to this thread, charmainejensenvoisine. Or cjv. I'm sure you will be familiar with some of the women here already, from several other active threads. I LOVE THIS THREAD. Love it 'cause we do share our different viewpoints, but also then comes a post that writes EXACTLY WHAT I WOULD WRITE and I love that too. NativeMainer got up a little before, and I like her early morning sensibilities!!! I was thinking, "Even if those doctors won't admit to radiation causing your frozen shoullder, any one of them can order some PT! Why are they not doing something to help!!!" So, I second that advice...get some PT a.s.a.p. I know that there was a thread about frozen shoulder in the Mid-Age forum. Not sure if it has been very active recently, but you might was to read what some others have been through.
Cookiegal where are you? How's your frozen shoulder doing now?
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Feel a little better. Can't tell if it is stomach or nausea.
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Thank you for the input on birth control! My oncologist didn't say anything about Tamoxifen and IUDs being a bad idea, so very good to know. Doubtful that I'll go a surgical route since I'm looking at short-term solutions while waiting for menopause to be complete. And while it does feel slightly silly to have to think about birth control, I'm happy to have to.
He's a wonderful man; a long time friend that's slowly, cautiously evolved into more than friendship.Love the zepplin tampon idea. I'll be very happy to be done with that!
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My onc tested my estradiol levels last visit and she assures me that I am nowhere near menopause with the high levels. Can't blame my irritability on that yet.
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heart- jealousy over a son is not uncommon. Even with good guys. Without being too generalized here I think men are somewhat designed to be the center of attention and they have really delicate egos (more so than us I believe) and when they are not the center of attention or have a grownup younger version of themselves....sometimes that jealousy kicks in. my hubby told me when i brought home our new first baby boy 30 years ago...who he loves dearly....:by seeing my love for my infant said "I see I will have some formidable competition from this little guy..." He was right:) The good news is he kept/keeps it in check by being a good pops to both our sons. Most guys I think would never admit it.
getting excited to see PS for a boob check seven days out....they keep changing little bit every dayand I actually feel great. Hoping he clears me to leave for NYC on Sunday. Once i get that I willhit all the threads and post details and cell so some of us can meet up...
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Well I'm a bit somewhereinbetween all of this. I think I have too much information and of course that keeps me questioning. Not a bad thing it's just until I can get something definitive I'm sure I 'll be wondering am I out of the woods. I recieved my path report back and it said lymphnodes were negative and all margins were cleared for cancer. hiphip hoooray!!!!! I say. Thank you Lord. However I have a question that I'm not clear about. Initially I chose the masectomy because I figured I would escape chemotherapy and radiation treatments but due to my age and being pre menapause. Is it necessary that I still have treatment done even with the knowledge that I do have.
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Somewhereinbetween - To have treatment or not is the million dollar question. That is a decision only you can make. I would advise discussing this with your MO. You did not post your dx so it is hard to tell you what I would do given the same circumstances. I chose lump, rads and Tamox. I did not have to have chemo - feel lucky on that one. I'm not sure age and menopausal status is totally the deciding factor.
Best of luck to you.
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Stanzi, I know exactly what you are talking about. I had latismus dorsi Feb 18, 2010. I had such a difficult time healing. My oncologist told me there was some concern that some of the chemos created problems with healing. I as on AC- and then taxol. However was also on clinical trial for Avastin - and that's the one that created the problems. I did not think I would ever get the bandages off.
Anyway, because of healing issue, Plastic S wanted me to wait a year to let the new breasts heal as much as possible. I too, had the "pillows" as you call them - I've also heard them called dog ears. Mine were so....hard that I could not lie down in the bed for over 8 weeks. I got my new nipples March 4 and he did the lipo on both sides and moved the fat to my breasts. I also had the dimpling effect. It helped a lot, but I still feel the dimpling some. I see him again April 13 and am anxious to see what he says about it. He also removed some fat from my stomach and transferred it. Be prepared - mine was outpatient surgery, but it does take a while. Mine took about 4 hours - PS told me that injecting the fat is a very slow process. Recovery has been good - just seemed to take a while to get my energy back. Just to give you a clue - my PS recommended that I wear some type of sports bra that fastens in the front. He said the front fastening type is not quite as tight as one that fastens in the back.
I know what you mean about another surgery. This was my 4th surgery in about 18 months. I'm tired of recovering. Take care and let me know if I can help answer any questions for you.
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annette - I never thought about how common jealousy must be between fathers and sons. Now I can feel a little more empathy towards the guy (which is better than what I WAS feeling!)
So glad to hear you are healing well, and I know you will have such a blast in NYC. NYC in the springtime is the best! Lucky you!
somewhereinbetween - my MO's answers and reactions to my questions was a HUGE factor in my decision-making regarding chemo or not. I hope you can get all the input you need to make a decision you feel satisfied with.
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Soitme good news DR said it shrunk half inch since 1st chemo . I will take better than growing. I thank God for it.
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Sherry:
You have probably read me on a RIF thread. I saw my Radiation Oncologist last week and brought the problem of my shoulder to his attention. Within moments he brings up the film on computer of where on my body I was receiving radiation therapy >>>> over the whole of my right breast and at the right side of right breast where incision was and up towards just below the right down from right underarm and he goes on to say that the radiation was so many inches from my underarm and that there is no way that the problem I am having with my shoulder/arm can be affected by radiation therapy. Even the breast surgeon did not say a whole lot when I saw him on Monday... grrrr
So I am going to make an appt for some time next week and approach my PCP on this. Although I am not quite certain of how I am going to approach him about this. I have been doing allot of reading online and aside from physio which is out being that this frozen shoulder came about in Sept/October >>>> there is a surgery that can repair the frozen shoulder also and it is called arthroscopic surgery?
Charmaine
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NativeMainer:
What I do not understand is that I have not since having the SNB been not limiting the use of my arm/shoulder, hmmm. I was often before the frozen shoulder in the kitchen reaching up in the upper cupboards for things on a pretty much daily basis as had no choice, do not have lower cupboards.
I organized my storage room last Summer and organized boxes on shelves and ect... so used arm allot there.
But yes I will be making an appt with my PCP for next week and see if I can get a referral to a PT .
Charmaine
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elimar:
About the thread in 'midage' about frozen shoulder did find it but it was not really that active.
Charmaine
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