MIDDLE-AGED WOMEN 40-60ish

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  • catbill
    catbill Member Posts: 102

    It's not my head that's lost.  My memory, however, is a different story.  It must be the Arimidex.

    Whem my BS and I spoke before surgery, I asked if I could do a BMX.  He quickly agreed and suggested a lymph node biopsy on both sides.  I didn't think of it at the time, but now I wonder if he thought there might be something on that side, too.  As it turned out, there was a couple of "pre-malignant" things but no cancer...and another scar.

    As far as reconstruction goes, at various times during the process, things did feel tight to me.  Hang in there.  It does get better. 

  • jo1955
    jo1955 Member Posts: 7,545
    heartnsoul - I don't think Sherry is talking about that kind of pot.  I think she is talking about potted plants. Laughing
  • JoanDavies
    JoanDavies Member Posts: 80

    I threw away my Tamoxifen on Thursday after taking it for three weeks. I was just reading too many bad things about the uterine cancer and blood clots. I didn't care about the other SEs, but why would I dodge the BC bullet, only to be taken down by the uterine cancer one? I have no regrets about quitting it, so why I am so nervous about telling my onc next Thursday when I see her for my six-week followup? Everything I'm reading says that for people with DCIS, Tamoxifen doesn't offer enough benefits to outweigh the risks. I mean, I did have the BMX to get rid of the cancer and a negative nodes report. Yes, I'm ER/PR+, but there must be other options for prevention than a toxic drug that offers so much conflicting research, there's no way to get a straight answer on its effectiveness. It's so frustrating not to know if I'm doing more harm than good, or vice versa. I would like to look to the doctor for the answers, but the truth is... they're guessing just as much as we are. I feel like I don't have any control over what happens next, even though I'm eating all the broccoli, brussels sprouts and blueberries I can (none of which I ate before my dx). What a mess BC leaves behind, even when you supposedly have cut it all out of you...

  • heartnsoul76
    heartnsoul76 Member Posts: 1,204

    LOL, Jo! I know, still I like the idea of referring to my potted plants as my pot plants! Should get a curious reaction or two at Home Depot... "Excuse me, where are your pot plants?" 

  • jo1955
    jo1955 Member Posts: 7,545
    heartnsoul - That would raise an eyebrow or two at my local Home Depot.  I live very close to the Mexican Border.  
  • thefuzzylemon
    thefuzzylemon Member Posts: 631

    Jo ... that made me laugh outloud!  Thanks!

  • Sandeeonherown
    Sandeeonherown Member Posts: 1,781

    charmaine...have you tried going to see an osteopath? There are also a wide variety of massage techniques that could help....less invasive than surgery

    Meece- I have been doing the same as patoo....I just look for my avatar and read from there:)

  • heartnsoul76
    heartnsoul76 Member Posts: 1,204

    jo - LOLOLOLOLOL! 

  • elimar
    elimar Member Posts: 5,885

    JoanD, it's all about the risks vs. benefits.  That goes for Tamox., AIs and in some cases chemo too.  I did not research DCIS (not having it myself) but it is quite another story having IDC.  When you have an invasive cancer, the risk of recurrence is much higher than the risk of clots or getting U/C.  That's what swayed me toward taking the Tamox., even tho' the S/E's do scare me.  When you go to the Onc, ask her to share the latest info. with you about Tamox. and DCIS and see if it meshes with what you have found on your own.  If she presents a good reason to stay with Tamox. then you may want to continue on it.  

    None of us really knows if we have made good choices; and none of the treatment choices come with a 100% guarantee against recurrence anyway.  About the best we can do is inform ourselves and then go with the choice that will provide us with the best peace of mind. 

  • thefuzzylemon
    thefuzzylemon Member Posts: 631

    Elimar - very well said.  When I read the post I was a little scared.  There is so much information and unknowns ... then more information ... it never ends and it gets so scary.  Your words really made a lot of sense and, for me, it was very comforting.  Thank you.

  • jo1955
    jo1955 Member Posts: 7,545

    Elimar - You summed it up nicely.  All we can do it arm ourselves with the latest information out there and hope for the best.  You are right when you said there isn't a 100% guarantee.  My diagnosis is very similar to yours and I too decided I had better do the Tamoxifen.  It has not come without some side effects for me but I do have them under control and will be able to live with them until my 5 years is over.

  • JoanDavies
    JoanDavies Member Posts: 80

    Elimar, thank you for your comments, and fuzzylemon - I didn't mean to scare you. It is about looking at the individual situations and diagnoses. I will definitely quiz the onc harder when I see her. I was obviously a little intimidated and overwhelmed when I saw her five weeks ago. I want to make sure I can balance what I'm reading on my own and what she tells me, just as you suggest.

    I was browsing on one of the other threads, about recurrence of BC for DCIS dx. I distinctly remember my BS telling me that by having the BMX, I'd be getting rid of the cancer. But that's not really true, is it? Ugh...I can't stop thinking about the stupid cancer, which supposedly isn't really a cancer, and certainly isn't as invasive as what some of you ladies are experiencing. Thanks for letting me verbalize my fears, it really is therapeutic. :)

  • lynniea
    lynniea Member Posts: 336

    I want to thank God all I have to pay for chemo is 15 dollars a treatment.

  • lynniea
    lynniea Member Posts: 336
  • jo1955
    jo1955 Member Posts: 7,545

    JoanD - That is what we are here for.  This is one scary disease and we never know when it is going to pop it's ugly head up.

    lynniea - That is great news.  Love the picture - it is beautiful. 

  • eph3_12
    eph3_12 Member Posts: 2,704

    laughed my ass off on the "pot plant" conversation-y'all just make my night sometimes!!

  • goldlining
    goldlining Member Posts: 10
    Another DCIS here. My BS proposed Tamox but referred me to Med Onc who rattled off the side effects and unknowns about efficacy, i.e., it aims at preventing invasive which we did not have, and does not address DCIS, which we might still get anyway. I wasn't that jazzed about even small chance of potential problems in the "basement" when it's such a toss up for benefits in the "balcony". I said, shoot, I'd rather go with the mastectomy bilaterally (which the BS stubbornly would not do in one step; hard enough to get the mast rather than just expansion of lumpectomy. They seem to like to nibble.). The prophy mast is still in the future (consult for that and immed bil recon is not until June). At last appointment, the Med Onc continues to agree no compelling case for Tamox for this situation. I'm with JoanD.
  • elimar
    elimar Member Posts: 5,885

    Welcome, goldlining, and thanks for you input (as a sister with DCIS.)

    Also, if I missed welcoming Newbies on the previous pages, forgive me, because this thread is getting so long now that I'm not sure who is new to this thread or who maybe has just not posted in a while, and this especially happens if I have read the names on another thread and become familiar with them from there.  It also happens if you have a higher number of posts when you are new to this thread...not as obvious as the ones that come with just 3 posts.  So if you are new, welcome!

    lynniea, nice pic!

  • CandyB
    CandyB Member Posts: 38

    JoanD - It's just not an easy, clear decision.  I went through the same process almost a year ago and had to find another oncologist who'd listen to my concerns.  The first was a jerk!  When you go for the visit w/your onc, ask her/him about subgroups who've developed uterine cancer.  My onc was able to give me specifics on the subgroups who were most likely to develop UC, blood closts, etc., which was helpful.  I didn't fall into any of them and eventually decided to go ahead w/the tamoxifen.  Almost a year in and minimal SEs that have pretty much disappeared.  Above all, remember it's your body and your choices!

     Who was it a page or 2 back that said forgetting to hit the microwave button for bacon was a confused day?  Jo1955?  Good God, woman, I'd consider that incredibly minor!  I've gotten to the point where my kids (2 teenagers left at home) and I just laugh that stuff off.  I blame that stuff on tamoxifen, too.  A great scapegoat!

     I can't grow plants to save my life, but am thinking a trip to the local nursery for some of those pot plants isn't too bad an idea.  Very funny!

  • Sherryc
    Sherryc Member Posts: 4,503
    Ok I am just reading your commnets on my pot plantsSurprised Boy did this give me a chuckle glad I can lead a funny converstion here.hehehe
  • lynniea
    lynniea Member Posts: 336

    Thanks ladies I feel grateful for having to know you all.  My hair is falling out fast is it easier to get it shaved now or just let it fall out.  And if I want is shaved what is the best place to go.  Thanks

  • jo1955
    jo1955 Member Posts: 7,545

    CandyB - I am the one who forgot to push the button on the microwave for the bacon.  Okay! It gets better.  I set my coffee up before I go to bed and turn the timer on.  So far so good, except I forgot the coffee grounds so I had nice hot water.  I am blaming in on the Tamoxifen and Lyrica I have to take.  That is my story and I am sticking to it.

    lynniea - I hate it that the chemo makes your hair fall out.  I did not have chemo but I would like to suggest a hairdresser.  Perhaps a referral from a friend or close neighbor.  Maybe some of the other ladies can chime in and better answer your question. 

  • barbaraa
    barbaraa Member Posts: 3,548

    {{{LYNNIE}}} Hugs girlfriend.

  • lynniea
    lynniea Member Posts: 336

    Thanks BarbaraA Sometimes you just need a hug.  I feel good.  I Have my second Chemo on Wednesday.  Is it easier the second time out.

  • heartnsoul76
    heartnsoul76 Member Posts: 1,204

    Lynniea - I am sorry I didn't go ahead and shave mine. It was awful watching it fall out, but the doctor told me she didn't think I would lose it all so I hung in there. Finally, there just wasn't much left so I cut it really short with scissors. I should have had it shaved in the beginning. It can be hard to do, but I was much happier when I finally did it.

  • Sherryc
    Sherryc Member Posts: 4,503

    Lynniea so sorry my friend. I did not have chemo but if u have a hairdresser that u have used for awhile maybe u could explain an get her to shave it in private. Not that I have great hair but I think I would be emotional about it. I think I would feel more in control by shaving. Do what will make u feel the best

  • karen1956
    karen1956 Member Posts: 4,619

    Lynniea....I would either get it cut really short or get it shaved.....My hair was long at the time of Dx.....gf who is a retired hairdresser cut my hair in a cute bob after my first chemo, then 2 weeks later, she cut it really short....and the next day it started to fall it....it fell out for about 3 or 4 days then stopped....a little was left and I kept it for awhile, not sure really why, as I still looked bald...finally had DH shave it when it looked like straw....I tried to go to the hairdresser before my gf cut it...I sat down in the chair, then had a panic attack and got up and left crying....for me it was easier to do it with a friend without lots of people around....the anticipation of loosing the hair was worse than  the actual loss......((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))))

  • eph3_12
    eph3_12 Member Posts: 2,704

    The cat is quite interesting E.  Story?

  • elimar
    elimar Member Posts: 5,885

    I'm too tired to make a story up right now, but I don't think any self-respecting cat would stand for something like that, or let's just say it would take a LOT of catnip convincing.

  • chrissyb
    chrissyb Member Posts: 11,438

    ROFLMAO at the above mentioned cat!!!!    Where do you find these pics Eli they really are very good!