The dumbest things people have said to you/about you
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hi, i also ck in here, but also dont post that often. i pretty well tell most ple now, when i disagree, or think theyre being asses.. i don't know if its' good, or bad, it just is.. sending a bus by if you have anyone to throw under it... i know Leah does....3jays
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there ya go! 3jays 0 -
Kymn --that's the way the thread unwinds and the ball bounces. Somtimes alot some times a little. Stay awhile the thread and ball equalizes out over time.
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LOVE the buses..... !!!
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the guy that brought me my chinese food. --I'm at the door with this big tin hat on and ask him how much he made by the delivery--1$. He starts backing up about 6 ft. I say keep the change, 5.00 tip for two miles. I'm sure he's still trying to figuire it out. But next time I call for take out, I bet he volunteers. Doesn't matter if he thinks I'm crazzzzzzzzzzzzy.
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lol...too funny SAS!!!
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I have so much to read here, but want to offer this one: My closest friend here in our little town has been watching my daughter (who has multiple disabikities, but is pretty functional and LOVES her kids) 2 afternoons a week for a few years.
Mid January she called me to say she didn't think I needed her help anymore since I wasn't working. (I chose to take a few months off from my job, which is seasonal and slow in the winter, to deal with chemo and all the scary stuff surrounding it.) I felt like saying, "I HAVE FUCKING CANCER!!!!!!", but didn't. She made this decision for me before I even started chemo. Thanks a bunch. She has become a very high-maintenence friend who I have to jettison very soon. And hasn't called me in weeks. Just sayin.
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CHARLOTTESMOMMA..Sometimes people are just plain ol ignorant.... when I told by EX bff I had bc she said "oh wow something else I have to deal with today" really? you? tha was in JUne we havent spoken sonce Sept I tried a call email and text over the holidays and havent heard from her so I am done. A 26 year friendship just like that... I often wonder why??? some say she couldnt deal, whatever...I look at it maybe that friendship was lost but I have gained so many more!!!!
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Wow. Fellow Women, I love your stories. I love your honesty. To those of you, me included, that have people tell us how lucky we are, I get it. Please leave your shitstorms here, we can deal with it.
I supposedly got better breasts! And I am cured, right? No.
I am not angry. I just want someone to say, "Would you like to talk about how this never goes away?"
I have buried people because of cancer. I feel this sorrow that never goes away. Maybe it shouldn't.
Peace...
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CRAZYKITTIES..OMG you are so right people dont get it If I hear one more time well least you got a tummy tuck out of it and all...because of the reconstruction I had... I now just say..yes I did but at what price????? or a good friend who actually later apologized said to me this weekend well at least all the scary stuff is over with. I said No THIS is the scary part...I will say she did call later and apologize but that is the kind of stuff we hear!
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Tink- I had a "friend " walk out of a 31 year friendship because I cried the primal scream. It's not like I cried that way all the time. They were countable and accountable. I just needed her to hold me. Instead she walked away. You never know---whose going to be there for you and who walks away.
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That is so true SAS..I found a quote awhile back I loved it says " Better a friend stand by you and say the wrong thing then a friend that walks away and say nothing"..
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Tink we are on so many waves together.
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i think thats the best quote ever! i've said that to friends when we talk. not maany, but the ones that "get it" sure, we ALL say things wrong, sometimes.. a friend says sorry, that was stupid, and hugs you. you love them, and you go on. the others "go on " themselves... 3jays
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I have to take one drug for 5 years that may or may not cause permanent damage to my bones and joints. Before I can take that drug, I have to get a Lupron shot to put/keep me in chemical menopause.My hip popped out 2 weeks ago and is not better, and I haven't gone to the doc because I can't afford it right now. Also, they will want to give me a steroid injection, and I hate steroids. I feel like I am 90. I get migraines 3 times a week, but that's not even that big of a deal. My chest muscles hurt every day from the reconstruction. I can't sleep on my sides or my stomach anymore.
Am I grateful we caught it early? Yes. But if I hear one more person say "you are cured, right? ",this will be my response.
"The crazy thing about breast cancer is that I will never know if I beat it until I die from something else."
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I've experienced the same thing... people say "well, it's over, now you can get on with your life."
I would like to think that is true, but somehow it just doesn't feel "over" to me.
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SAS...So glad we get to ride the wave together!!!
Good morning ladies !
CRAZYKITTIES...So sorry to hear about your hip and hope you are feeling better soon! Yes I agree even my Onc said to me we will never say "cured" we only say remission... people just dont get that the aftermath is sometimes the hardest part ! hugs!
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Hi Ladies,
I just returned to work in mid Feb and I am on a "gradual"return (next week I am back to my regular hours). Anyways, we had a deadline last week for April 1st. My co workers (who I will say are usually very supportive and well meaning) said I could be incharge of training some students b/c they did not have time. The comment made was "well you have been off work for the last year" In other words, I needed to pitch in and help them out.
OMG, I know they prob. had no idea that they implied I was at home eating bon bons and living the life of luxury! I shrugged off the remark but I thought to myself WOW, others really don't get the get the whole BC and treatment thing...
Regards,
Chalex
Diagnosis: Aug, 2009, IDC, 7-8 cm, 0/15 nodes, Grade 3, ER+/PR+ HER+
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A "friend" told me during a tel. conversation veering on the subject of old people's homes, that she "did not like nor want to be around sick people" . Did she actually forget she was talking to me while babbling ? Never called her back !0
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Luan- Your friend likely does not think of or see you as 'sick people'....the up side of that is that she sees you and not your cancer (trying to see upsides right now!)
Tink- remission...not cured....oy! As soon as my heart ishealed, I am getting a double tattoo of ribbons pink and red...in hopes that the supersticiousness of it all will keep cancer and heart crap away from me indefinitely!
Chalex- I completely understand....but they assume if you ar eback, you are 'BACK' with a capital B...a reminder of why you were out might shut them up (or shut them down, dependingon how you think of it)
Crazykitty- sorry to hear about the hip and pains and sorrow....and the insensitivities of others....I tend to think people generally mean well but sometimes.....sometimes....not so much
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i always wonder.. when they say i can now "get on with life" WHAT LIFE111? EVERYTHING IS STILL WONKY OVER 2 YEARS LATER.. ID HAVE TO FIND A LIFE, TO GET ON WITH IT!!! IM JUST SAYIN... 3JAYS (SORRY ABOUT ALL THE CAPS)
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3jays..thats the truth. I dont think people get that just because you "look" ok it doesnt mean everything is ok. That what this does to us emotionally stays much longer than they think. The aftermath is the hardest part as far as I am concerned.... I am only I am only 9 months out from diagnosis and yes people think well the hard part is behind you... ugh!!!! no its just staring! because now it is all starting to sink in!
Hi Sandee!!!!!
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I had cancer in my breast, not my face! Of course I look good you idiot!!
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barbe1958 once again you nail it!!
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barbe you are hysterical!!!! i love that!!!! thanks!
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Thanks Barb... you got me laughing this morning!
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as usual, Barbe.. i love ya, gal... 3jays
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I have to write this down here, as I need to vent. At work we are starting a walking program (Heart healthy kind of thing). I had surgery for breast cancer, chemo & radiation which was completed at the end of November 2010. One of the girls on my team was offended when I didn't want to use a "pink theme" for our team name. I tried to be gentle and let them all know that this is about heart health right now, and I'm trying to not have 'everything' in my life be about my having had cancer!!! I even said that 'as a team' perhaps we could do the Avon Walk for the Cure or Susan G. Komen walk etc etc etc......was I wrong in suggesting this???? I am forever 'changed' by having had breast cancer, but I also want to not always be known for the 'pink lady' at work. sorry, just had to get this off of my chest.
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Just pulling out from some of the most miserable and painful days of my life...thanks to taxotere. I had both my mother and daughter helping me as I was pretty much bed-ridden. Both of them commented on how wonderful my complexion looked..I've apparently never looked better. I should have looked GREEN so was wondering how that could even be possible. I was just too sick to even think of a response. Being told how good I looked while I felt so awful didn't really help.
Barbe..got a good come back for that one?
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That being said, I am not opposed to the Pink Ribbon theme at all. I have received several subtle pink ribbon gifts and I treasure those, so not wanting to have my walking team named the "pink ladies" was not about that at all.
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