thread for middle age to older Christian women.
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Hi All,
I feel like I am interrupting your current relationships ) I would love to pray for you guys and would like to share my current concerns. You can see my stats - no sign of cancer for 7 years. I was so blessed by my initial results. I asked the oncologist what we should pray for - he said, "no lymph node cancer and invasive less than 1 cm" God allowed that to happen and my prognosis was great! That was in 2005. Several months ago I found a small bump on the inside edge of my TRAM flap breast. I searched the net and figured it was a wart or something. I couldn't find any info on recurrence of TRAM flap. The bump is now bigger - about the size of a pea and is both raised as a bump above the skin and has density below as well. My oncologist was too busy to see me for a bit. He was on vaca this week and booked next so they told me to go to my internist. He called it a nodule and is sending me straight to a surgeon - needs to come out for biopsy. He also mentioned a sebacious cyst or recurrence. I did lots of reading - I should have been looking for recurrence after mastecomy. Then, the descriptions fit my little lump. Anyway, God has my attention. I have been an on-fire believer for a long time and because of issues with our kids, I stopped my spiritual disciplines - haven't been in the Word and it has been six weeks since church. I was rebelling against God - deep down I think I was angry at Him for the mental disorder our daughter is battling. Yesterday, I started reading in John. I will go to church this weekend. It is so amazing that reading His Word brings my relationship of love back. I know He is there - it is me who left the relationship.
I see a surgeon on Thursday to see what he wants to do. I am praying for His will but for this not to be a recurrence. Anyone heard of this type of recurrence? I guess it is not as common - local recurrence. My mind is going in so many different directions - like cleaning out my closet and prepping to get sick. I want to be ready for whatever is coming like chemo, radiation. Thanks for letting me share. I am a little scared of the future but totally trust God with it. Blessings, Donna
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Dear Donna, thank you for coming to this wonderful and supportive Christian thread. I have never had this medical issue, but I am sure someone will come along with advice. I just have a feeling that it is going to be alright. Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. Please keep us posted. Yes, Trust in Our Lord with all your heart, He will direct your path. He is the source of all bounties and blessings He will never leave you!!!!
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Kindergarten - I already called dibs on being the fun grandma!0
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Donna BIG hugs. LOL where there are Christians there are going to be relationships :-). I dont "own" this thread but I think its very safe to say no matter what this thread "is doing" it is always open to other Christians to come on in. Anyway a big welcome, you arent interrupting anything.
I dont care what anyone says, it is normal to sometimes feel fear and to know things like perhaps our trust is not what it should be. Anyone who has been, is, or will be angry has my deep and immediate compassion. Big hugs. Yes we rebel, go around mountains again and again, but I think God really knows our heart in all this. After all our world is turned upsidedown.
I pray for your battles you are facing with your children and the tremendous stress that comes from that. I pray that God will give you a renewed strength that as you obey His promptings to do those things that please Him, that He will give you that something extra like a peace that passes understanding.........I pray and thankyou Lord that as Donna reads your word that it will sink deep in her spirit and speak to her heart.....that You will use it to show her even what she should be doing next.Thankyou Lord Amen.
That is an amazing and brave step youve taken to acknowledge what is always the case with every single one of us, that its never Gods fault, and how easy it is sometimes to blame Him.
I hope someone will chime in and help you to know more about your lump and Im not sure if this type you describe is common or not. Im sure there will be lots of prayer for you here. There is some really good info here at BC Forums within threads for all types of different scenarios. There might be something on the Top Page that deals with this.
Hang in there
Musical
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Welcome Donna, as Musical said, newcomers are always welcome here. I'm 2 1/2 years from my dx. I had three larger tumors but no lymph node involvement. I completely understand your fear. I'm sure that everyone here has been well acquainted with it at one time or another. I will be praying that the lump that you feel turns out to be nothing serious. It is very easy for our minds to go to the scariest thoughts. I had a sinus headache the other night and was convinced I had mets to my brain! Try not to let that fear monster grab hold of you. I do know it's easier said than done. Just try to focus on the cross and the fact that God knows every concern of your heart. He is always with you. There is nothing you can do to make God love you any more or any less if you are His child. He loved You enough to send His only Son to die for you. That's what grace is all about. He loves us so much more than we could ever imagine. Share your anxious thoughts with Him and ask for His peace to surround you. I will be specifically praying for that peace for you as well. Please keep us posted and if you want to come here and share, know that you have a sisterhood of wonderful ladies here just waiting to pray for and encourage you. Blessings!
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Hi Ladies!
Hope everyone felt encouraged today. I think of you all throughout the day and often bring you before the Lord in prayer. Please pray for me as my husband will be coming home tomorrow for 45 days! It is an adjustment. I haven't seen him very much for the past 4 years with his work. He is a believer and desires to please God with his life which is how we have made it as long as we have. He does suffer from depression which can be very difficult for all of us. Pray for me to be pleasing to God as a wife and a mom. I am so thankful He has allowed me to be that. Hopefully, one day I will be as blessed as many of you are being with all these grandbabies!
I hope you all rest well tonight. I'm trying to take the aromasin earlier in the day. I'm hoping it will help me sleep better.
Love you all!
Donna Hi and Welcome! I haven't experienced that but I can relate to your fears. I recently went for a follow up from a hysterectomy/ooph and my gyn noticed a thickened area in my remaining breast. The mammogram showed a new lump which was very large to have not been there last year. I got the biopsy back this week and it was benign. I'm still waiting on the mri results which they told me I would have in about a week if everything was alright. If not it would be when my doctor gets back which is Monday. I just began today to think about the fact I didn't hear from them this week but I feel good about it since the biospy and ultrasound looked alright.
It is scary. It is so easy to lose focus when that happens but it sounds like you have focused in on the only source of true comfort and peace and that we know is in our Lord. I'm sorry to hear of your daughter's mental disorder. That would be very difficult.
mini1 Congratulations on your new grandbabies! I have twins. Congratulations also on your last week of radiation being here. I just finished at the end of April. It was the day before my son's graduation ceremony. It was a very formal ceremony with about 50 others who were home schooled. I had radiation to my armpit and back as well due to the lymph node involvement and I worried for weeks about what I would wear. It worked out. More time spent on useless worry!
kindergarten Congratulations to you on your grand daugher's upcoming arrival! Do you have grandsons or is this your first?
Jo5 I think we could write a book. The wonderful thing is....ours would be about so much more than cancer. Looks like we've all faced trials of various sorts. The better thing is....from all our trials, before, during, after and including cancer the answer to them all was found in Christ. He has been our hope and we can see in all these circumstances how He was drawing us to Him! Yes....a cancer book but the big "C" would be Chirst!
I have also had alot of stress in my life, mostly the past 12 years. Just the past couple of years I have wondered what it is doing to my body. I do believe it contributed to my cancer.
Rocket What a beautiful story about your mom! I'm so thankful she knows God as her Savior! When I read that I thought of the prodigal son but with a prodigal mom. It must be wonderful to have the opportunity to extend grace in such a way and be a living example of God's love in action.
I'll be praying for you over your upcoming move. Do you have support where you are moving to? Is there a church there that you are considering or will you have to start anew on that?
macatacmv Don't you love it when you are reading/studying God's word and then you get it repeated through conversations or some other way? I was just thinking the other day how the Word was with God in the beginning. Even then, long before tablets, scrolls and paper, He created us knowing He was going to have a way to speak directly to us one day. Just amazes me.
Keep us posted on what you are learning and all the little things that just jump out at you that are really big things! Do you ever do that...think that is so simple but so deep at the same time?
Musical I have had your mom in my prayers as well as you. I hope she had a good day today. I hope you both are able to rest.
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Fondak , thankyou for your prayers.Bless you.
Ive been trying to figure out time zones.... did you say youre east US? When you posted this last post was it about 11.30pm?. (14th) It was 3.30pm 15th here (1/2hour ago approx.) ....bit confusing we are 8 hours "behind" you but 16 hours ahead..... Hopefully you are off to get some shut eye and have sweet dreams. IM off to see my mum shortly.
Blessings all you Ladies
Musical
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Ladies,
I'm off this morning to texas for exchange on tuesday. I will be out of state (and away from my kids) for over two weeks. This has been a logistical web! They have never been without me this long.
My family and I could use your prayers, today and in the days ahead as the Holy Spirit guides you.
In Him,
Tonya
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Good mornng! it is 8am here on east coast of us. I am getting ready to go to church, I pray that I can hear with an open heart this morning. My DS is going to give me a ride. I pray he can hear with an open mind.
I have been feeling so broken before the Lord lately. I got really sad at Bible Study yesterday and haven't been able to shake it since. I think the other women just think I am feeling sorry for myself. I want to feel the victory in Jesus. So this visiting Pastor has his work cut out for him to get me out of the desert and into the promised land.
Mini, I finished rads a few months ago so I pray your last week goes by quickly with no more skin break down. Are you getting some boosts at the end? I found if I donated some pure cotton tshirts to the cause and soaked them in aquaphor and then put in cool place and put them on, it cooled the sting. (not frozen) I also exposed the skin to the air, so that people had to call before they came over or they might get quite the suprise. My skin is healed now and I just have a tan area that runs across my chest and under my arm. I also got some OT/PT to learn stretching exercises for the skin to keep it supple. I also had shoulder issues, but now have full range of motion. My RO ordered it for me. It was a very healing experience after the trauma of the rads.
I had a long conversation about my lung issues with a sister here on bco. She is a nurse. I really need to be more of an advocate for myself with my docs and get a definitive diagnosis. She had some great advice, but also some sobering information.
I pray for all of you to have a day with Christ's word. That it speaks to you today in a way that heals and comforts.
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Thank you for the encouragement. This has been a tough morning with no sleep last night. I am praying for God to show me the right answer for medical care. I posted a note to John Hopkins regarding my situation. They want me to call Monday to be seen on Tuesday. I just need my husband's company to approve this - they are self-funded for health insurance. Hopkins is 2 1/2 hrs away. I am trusting that God has opened this door for a reason but still asking Him to make it clear. I don't want to incurr debt for my husband - not knowing what my medical needs for the future will be. We have already spent a lot on our daughters medical care and have incurred debt. Such is life...but I hate the pressure it puts my husband under.
Maybe with things escalating in the middle east - Ezekial prophecy is coming close and our Savior will pull us out of here! That would be good news except for the unsaved peeps in my and all of our lives.
Love to hear about grandbabies!!! You guys are so blessed. I am so happy for you to have the experience of new life after all you have gone through. I would think it brings immense joy!
Tonya will be praying for your precious family while you are away
Fondak praising God right now in prayer for your benign-ness. I thought that would make an interesting word. Praying for rest for you so you can better deal with your husband's depression. I know it is hard for me to be the mom I need to be for my daughter when I don't get rest. I hope your reunion is totally blessed and joyous and God will keep the depression out of your relationship.
I will read your threads and pray for all of you. It will take me a bit to get familiar with you all. )
An all time fav: No matter what: He knows His plans for us, plans to prosper us and not to harm us, plans to give us hope and a future. We will call on Him and pray to Him and He will listen to us. He will always be found by us when we seek Him - the Creator of the universe! His plan is to redeem us and conform us to the likeness of His Son - that is the good that He does in our lives from Romans 8:28. It is all about Jesus and the testimony of our lives. The big picture helps me not focus on my little stuff. ) Now if I can just not let the other creep into my brain.
Donna
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Good morning, everyone!!! I wanted to have time to post before heading off to church. Fondak, thank you so much for your Congratulations. We have a grandson from our daughter-in-laws first marriage. He is a delight and keeps us busy with his baseball games!!! He will be 13. Tonya, I m lifting you up in prayer right now, for a sucessful surgery and a speedy recovery. May our Lord surround your dear children with loving caregivers while you are away. May they feel peace knowing that you are in good hands and will be home soon. God bless you!!! Mini1, yes we can share stories on how fun we can be, he,he,he!!! Macatacmv, I0
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Oops, sent the post too soon,!!! Macatacmv, I know the feelings you are having right now, You are still so early in your journey with breast cancer, you will regain peace, faith and strength as you get farther out from your diagnosis and treatment. It does get better, I promise. You are human and Our Lord understands your fears and brokeness. He wants us to come to HIM with our fears and doubts. It draws us closer to HIM.Talk to HIM, every day and He will prepare you for what is ahead. You will then become a mentor and role model for others going through challenging times. God bless you!!! Donna, so glad you are here with your posts and encouraging words. Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. Musical, Have a wonderful day with your mom. Blessings to you all!!!!!0
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Rocket, your vulnerability and honesty made me cry. When we share our true selves, something wonderful happens between Christians. I'm sorry about the lymphedema. I don't have it, but won't be surprised if I get it, with all the nodes taken and radiation in September. I have been reading Jesus Calling, a devotional written as if God is speaking directly to the reader. I have found it so comforting. Today it talked about how God has His eyes on us. An awesome thought. It talked about a little child, scared in his bed in the dark, and asking if his parent was watching him. God is with us and watching over us, willing to comfort and care.
My thoughts and prayers are with all of you! I don't know how you remember all the names.....I don't want to list any for fear of leaving someone out! But you are all important.
My quick update: just did chemo #8 on Friday and it completey took my energy on Saturday. I'm hoping I'll start bouncing back today. 4 more treatments, then a break, then rads, then a break, then 12 more chemotherapies. I try to write chemotherapy if I'm not too lazy, because I have to remember that it is a therapy to kill the cancer.
Have a great Sunday!
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Learmin - I have a friend who had a beautiful (inside and out) daughter that died 2 years ago at age 27 from Type 1 diabetes. She was a witness to the very end. She influenced people, both staff and others patients, at multiple hospitals throughout her illness. Her mom keeps up her FB page and she has hundreds more "friends" now than when she died. Her mom had a chance to go to Australia and share her story at a church there and continued her daughter's legacy there by sharing her story of strength and hope.
Though it was sad for thoseof us left behind, we know that God was merciful in allowing her to come home and to cease her suffering. Ask anyone who ever met her if she had an impact on their life and you will hear an unqualified yes. One of her former hospital roommates, upon hearing of her death, asked if she could travel from hours away to play her violin at her funeral. She wanted to give her something back as a special thank you for all the encouragement she had given her while they were in the hospital together. Though she was in exteme pain throughout her body and losing her vision she would always reach out to those around her to encourage them. She struggled no doubt, but she also exemplified joy and Christ's love throughout her short life. There is no doubt in my mind that God used her to bless many people right until the end.
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The sermon at church today was on contentment. I definitely needed to hear that one. It was our last Sunday in our wonderful church of eight years. My DH is an elder in that church and we had made many friends in those years. We will be moving to the mountains this Thursday and I'm both excited, and sad. We will miss our friends here and even though we will see them several times a year when we visit our family, it will be different. I cried as I hugged several of the women that helped me through the BC journey.
Jeannie, bless your heart having to go through so much chemo! I'm praying right now that God will renew your strength and help you endure so much treatment. I only made it through three rounds of chemo due to my heart arrhythmia. It put me in the hospital. I didn't end up getting the final round. I did have seven weeks of rads though and after all was said and done, it took me a while to recover from the fatigue.
I pray through all of your requests as I read them. It is a joy getting to know you lovely sisters. You have been such a support for me. I may be off the boards for a few days later in the week due to the move, so don't think I'm ignoring any of you. You are all so precious and dear.
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Hi Rocket,
As I couldn't sleep last night the Lord led me to pray for your move. Praying He would cover all the details - go before you, with you, and after you and hem you in. Praying your health would be good and strong and for good rest. Those were a couple of the main points ) I love when our God loves us so much that He prompts prayer. He loves YOU that much! We moved from a strong church in CA a year post bc for me. It was hard. I am so thankful those ladies and brothers will be with me for eternity. Donna
God opened a door for me to go to John Hopkins for my local recurrence. I happened to ask a question on their "ask the expert". The head of the breast center told me to call Monday (today) and come on Tuesday to start with a core biopsy because this is a "tricky" one. Praise Him for showing me where to go. Praying insurance would allow it to help with the out of pocket costs. Hoping this cancer is contained and no mets.
Off to work - night 2 of no sleep. I am just wired at night. Until later dear sisters!
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Thank you Bhammer. That is such an encouragement to me.
Have you been told that it is definitely cancer? I am praying for you that this is not a recurrence and that insurance will cover your visit to J. Hopkins. I pray that all of your caregivers will be kind, capable and compassionate, and more importantly Christians. Please keep us posted as we are here to pray for your specific needs.
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Rocket -- Good luck with your move. I'm sure it will be stressful at times, but how exciting that you get to embark on a new adventure in the midst of all this. I'm sure God has great plans for you in your new home!
"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jer 29:11
Happy moving!
PS Only 6 more rads to go! Yeah!!
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Praising God! Not cancer but an abcess/infected area. Local recurrence in a breast after mastectomy is not a good thing. God has given me my life back and I am so thankful. More importantly, He got my attention and has my attention and devotion back where it should be - on Him alone.
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Bhammer, Praise the Lord for the good news, sorry that you have an abcess, but not cancer. You must be so relieved and thankful. Our Lord is smiling down at you, and knowing what a faithful servant you are. We all have spiritual freezes, and God knows that. Enjoy your wonderful news. God bless you, Kathy0
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Praising God Bhammer! What a huge relief. This just made my evening. I will continue to pray for healing!
Hang in there Mini1! You're almost done! I hope when it's over you can take some time to rest and recuperate. The fatigue can get to you at the end. Be gentle with yourself!
Loving hugs to all.0 -
JO-5: Hello! Haven't seen you in a very long time... I hope you're doing well...It's been 4 whole years since my mx. Time sure does fly!
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Bhammer "benign-ness" I like that...it certainly does make for an interesting word. I thank God for your "benign-ness" as well . My final report on the mri came back today also very good. I also thank God for putting people in my life that wil pray for me and my family. Thank you so much for your prayers. My husband has certainly seen God working in his life with the bible studies he has been able to participate in while he was away. He said it really made a huge difference and he is feeling very well and already so helpful to have around!
Tonlee Sorry to hear you are going to have to be away from your children for a spell but praying that God will use this for His glory and the time will pass quickly for your children...and you. So many times the things we would like to change is the very thing that God is using to make us stronger and has us looking at Him more. It's my prayer that he uses this is one of those times for you and your family. Also, praying for your travels.
I'm sure this is a stupid question for someone who has been dealing w/cancer for almost a year now but what is an exchange?
Jeanine57 Praying your energy is returning from your last treatment and that the treatment is doing everything they hope for it to do.
Kindergarten I thank God that He has blessed your grandson with grandparents who stay busy attending his ballgames and the blessing of your health to be able to attend!
Rocket Praying for you this week and the coming weeks as you make this transition and all that's involved there. I also pray that God provides you with new sisters and brothers in Christ to love and be loved by along with a place of growth and a place for your husband to continue to serve and use the gifts God has given him.
Macatacmv I'm so thankful that you were able to make it to church Sunday. I pray that you will be encouraged throughout the week by His grace and through His word.
Musical YOu and your mom are still in my prayers. Also, thanking God for the love you two share and how you are able to speak of your mom as you do because of the grace He has given her in her life.
Mini1 Another day down for you....not much longer to go!
Love all you ladies here and keeping you in my prayers! Goodnight!
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Thank you, Fondak, We really enjoy going. We did the same for our sons. It keeps us busy0
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Fondak,
An exchange occurs when the tissue expander placed to stretch the skin after MX, is taken out and replaced with a softer implant.
ANSWERED PRAYER
Thank you all for your prayers. Everything went smooth, was even a very pleasant experience. The medical people were all so awesome.
Now on to healing so I can get back to my boys.
Thank you so much!
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Praise the Lord! That's great news TonLee. You will be back with your boys into time!
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From my Bible reading today. " I will praise You with my whole heart; Before the gods I will sing praises to You. I will worship toward Your holy temple, And praise Your nameFor Your lovingkindness and Your truth;For You have magnified Your word above all Your name. In the day when I cried out, You answered me, And made me bold with strength in my soul. All the kings of the earth shall praise You, O Lord, When they hear the words of Your mouth. Yes, they shall sing of the ways of the Lord, For great is the glory of the Lord. Though the Lord is on high, Yet He regards the lowly;But the proud He knows from afar. Though I walk in the midst of trouble, You will revive me;You will stretch out Your handAgainst the wrath of my enemies, And Your right hand will save me. The Lord will perfect that which concerns me;Your mercy, O Lord, endures forever;Do not forsake the works of Your hands."
-Psalms 138:1-8 (NKJV)0 -
Rocket, thanks for the word today. I needed to read that. I am sitting here nebulizing and forgetting to praise Him! He has brought me through so much and will bring me though this too.
I spoke to my onco nurse yesterday and she said these lung issues can take a long time to resolve. She said I should tell my drs how bad i am feeling. Like i don't tell every dr I see how bad I am feeling? She said I am too polite. LOL I have an appt for the 30th.
Here's one thing I am praising God for this morning; it is my son's 27th birthday. I was not a very healthy (life style wise) person when he was born. I was not saved and making poor choices. My DS was born 6.5 weeks early and was just 3lbs 10oz at birth. But even after all the poor choices I had made he was healthy just very small. He had to stay in the hospital for a while, but he is now a robust young man. It took me another 2 years to get clean, and find out I was pregnant again and another 5 years to finally surrender to God and let Jesus save me. So I praise God for having patience with me. And I pray for me to have patience with me. And you all to have patience with me.
Pray for me to have strength tonight. My DS want me to take 6 of his friends out for dinner for his bday. We did it last year, but I was feeling great last year, not so much this year. They all drink and carry on and I don't drink and try to keep up with the conversation and pay the bill. I am grateful that they want me to come with them. But I will need some extra strength and stamina.
Prayers for all!!!!!
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Maca.
You are lifted.
Especially the lung issue..
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That was awesome Rocket!
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