Calling all TNs
Comments
-
Hi all -
I am new to this site, but was diagnosed in June right before my 39th birthday. Had a lumpectomy to remove what we thought was a large benign mass, but it turned out to be metaplastic, triple negative, mixed with some in situ ductal carcinoma. The margins weren't clear since the surgeon thought it was benign. (I had a core biopsy that missed the mass and gave me a false report). I just finished neoadjuvant dose-dense AC/T chemo on 10/21 and made it through without having to miss teaching a class or any of my boys' (age 11 and 9) baseball games. It wasn't always easy, but I'm glad that the drugs are now working their way out of my system. My worst problems were with constipation and loss of appetite (lost 15 pounds and I was 124 to begin with), tiredness and joint pain with the taxol. For the last two taxol does, I didn't have to take the neulasta shot, and I realized that the shot had been responsible for a lot of the flu-like symptoms.
I have a double mastectomy scheduled in 4 1/2 weeks - still not 100% sure whether to start reconstruction with tissue expanders at the same time, so I would appreciate any advice on that. Doctors say they need to wait for post-surgery path report before deciding if I need more chemo or radiation.
Thanks for this site - it is very helpful to read about others' experiences.
0 -
In some good news, my kitties are 6 mos old now, so I'm going to bore you with pictures.
Lucy at about 8 weeks:
And at 6 mos.:
Lovey at about 10 weeks:
and at 6 mos.:
Both girls on top of the kitchen hutch:
And Lucy enjoying their new cat tree:
0 -
Thanks, Teka. *proud mama* Lucy was a feral rescue at 5 weeks and Lovey was part of a litter surrendered to a no-kill shelter. They're not related at all and have very different personalities, but get along wonderfully. I highly recommend shelter kitties.
Since Lucy was snatched so young, she has some "missing her mama" issues, which means she likes to suck on my earlobes at night. I don't mind; it's adorably cute. The shelter said Lucy was meant to be a "trap, vaccinate, neuter and release" back to her feral colony. Thankfully, the lady at the shelter intervened and convinced the person who brought them in that they were young enough to be tamed and could have a much better life indoors, at which point the shelter had them vaccinated, neutered and fostered for a few weeks until they could be put up for adoption.
I talked to the shelter volunteer who fostered them (her siblings went fast) and she was surprised Lucy was so affectionate, as she had been the wildest of her litter and very wary of people. Just meant to be, I guess.
ETA: An update for those reading earlier; the girls have gotten their all-clear on the ringworm thing. (Lovey had a spot on the end of her nose and Lucy had a spot on the back of her ear, which was helpfully ring-shaped, so I could get them to the vet and on treatment ASAP.)
0 -
Yowch!! They're tiny, but ferocious, aren't they? And fast!!!
0 -
Riley,
They are so cute! Rescue kitties are the best. I have one that is so affectionate now but when he was a little feral kitten (just having been trapped at 8 weeks) - he bit the vet tech's glove so hard he left a baby tooth in it. Love Lovey's little back feet in the photo of her on her back! Too cute! Lucy reminds me of my kitty who is sound asleep on the bed next to me right now. I had dexamethasone today with my infusion and can't sleep!
Thanks for sharing the photos! I love to see happy cats in good homes.
0 -
well i feel like i don't post enough to be able to share, but i also feel like this is a place i can vent so here it goes.
first......LJ and Suze....I am so happy for you.
all the new peeps...sorry to see you here but good for you to find such a group.
well....my cancer is back. i finished 3 months of cisplatin and gemzar and suddenly found a lump 2 days before my mid treatment scan. F**K! Really? that is how it went down. i woke up, to a shower and found a new lump the day before my "scheduled" scan. i really don't even know what to say at this point except "I'm over it and please let me off this ride"!
i am so scared and don't know what to do. three times in less than 2 years? dig me a hole so i can hide..........of course i am going to continue to fight (like a girl) but really i just want to run and hide. how do you girls do it with such grace? i am so over it
any suggestions for survival tactics would be appreciated. thanks!
0 -
Thanks, Christina! They both curl their back toes while sleeping. It's super cute
Inmate, that sucks. Hard. I don't have any advice for you, just a hug. (((inmate))) Hopefully, someone will be along shortly with some suggestions and/or advice. And feel free to vent here anytime.
0 -
Inmate: I know exactly how you feel. I had a recurrence during radiation, and now brain metastasis. I think the recurrence was harder to handle because it meant all this things I had just been through: chemo, surgery ABD radiation, I would have to AGAIn!!! I'm tired and its not fair!!!! It was a struggle for me to think about the implications of it coming back so soon.
I would say my coping mechanism is distraction: family, work, sleeping pills! I am working with a hypnotherapist to help focus my subconscious on positivity and fighting. Who knows if it works, but what has been mentioned by many KICK-A** fighters here (Suze & LJ), is that it's about how it makes you feel every day, and if it feels right to you: do it!!0 -
dutchermann - sorry you had to joing us here but, welcome. I had a double mastecomy and had the tissue expanders put it then. My Plastic Surgeon also did a partial "fill" at the time. I hope you the best with your recovery. I hope you find this site to be useful - there is alot of great information than can be found here!0
-
Thanks for the words of encouragement. I am amazed by how many people are dealing with the same stuff I've been dealing with - and it is helpful to hear what gets you through it. Main thing is that this is scary stuff and there are so many unknowns.
I've met a couple of women during chemo who are on their 3rd round with cancer, really amazing. The only thing they've told me is at least they know what to expect, and how to handle the side effects of treatment. We also have oncology massage available here, and that's helped me relax - almost like a mini-therapy session.
0 -
Teka yes, unfortunately it is malignant. still waiting for the full path to see if it is in fact the same TN as my original.
0 -
inmate and Survivor2Be- So sorry you have to go through all of this again. Big hugs to you both. I just hate BC!!!!!!!!!!!!0
-
((((inmate))))
((((survivortobe))))
0 -
survivor2be I am so sorry to hear that you too have been dealt a tough blow. The second diagnosis is very hard indeed. I told the nurse that I'm just over it. I guess cancer isn't quite over us. Sending you lots of good thoughts and positive energy that this is the last time you have to hear that it is back.0
-
survivor and inmate (((hugs))) so sorry you are having to deal with this all over again! Cancer SUX!
0 -
Inmate and Survivor - I only have a moment, but I want to give you my support - getting this news is such a blow, but you CAN be strong, and as inmate says so well, fight like a girl! It is okay to be pissed, anguished, lost, defeated. All of those emotions are normal and healthy. But you WILL wake up again soon ready to take this on and fight. And the days will come where you laugh and joke again, and start to see the beauty in each moment, along with the hell. I am on a "girls weekend" with my BFF, and we have laughed and cried, as it should be. If either if you want to talk, I'm here. My thoughts are with you tonight.
0 -
Inmate and Survivor2Be,
I'm so sorry that you are both going through this! I hate FC! Hugs to both of you!
0 -
New Mexico Chili Cook-off If you can read this whole story without laughing, then there's no hope for you. I was crying by the end. This is an actual account as relayed to paramedics at a chili cook-off in New Mexico .
Note: Please take time to read this slowly. If you pay attention to the first two judges, the reaction of the third judge is even better.
For those of you who have lived in New Mexico , you know how true this is. They actually have a Chili Cook-off about the time Halloween comes around. It takes up a major portion of a parking lot at the Santa Fe Plaza . Judge #3 was an inexperienced Chile taster named Frank, who was visiting from Springfield , IL . Frank: “Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. The original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table, asking for directions to the Coors Light truck, when the call came in. I was assured by the other two judges (Native New Mexicans) that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy; and, besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted and became Judge #3.
Here are the scorecard notes from the event:
CHILI # 1 - MIKE'S MANIAC MONSTER CHILI Judge # 1 -- A little too heavy on the tomato. Amusing kick. Judge # 2 -- Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild. Judge # 3 (Frank) -- Holy crap, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I hope that's the worst one. These New Mexicans are crazy.
CHILI # 2 - EL RANCHO'S AFTERBURNER CHILI Judge # 1 -- Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno tang. Judge # 2 -- Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously. Judge # 3 -- Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.
CHILI # 3 - ALFREDO'S FAMOUS BURN DOWN THE BARN CHILI Judge # 1 -- Excellent firehouse chili. Great kick. Judge # 2 -- A bit salty, good use of peppers. Judge # 3 -- Call the EPA. I've located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now. Get me more beer before I ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the back, now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I'm getting shit-faced from all of the beer.
CHILI # 4=2 0- BUBBA'S BLACK MAGIC Judge # 1 -- Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing. Judge # 2 -- Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili. Judge # 3 -- I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it. Is it possible to burn out taste buds? Sally, the beer maid, was standing behind me with fresh refills. This 300 lb. woman is starting to look HOT ... Just like this nuclear waste I'm eating! Is chili an aphrodisiac?
CHILI # 5 - LISA'S LEGAL LIP REMOVER Judge # 1 -- Meaty, strong chili.. Jalapeno peppers freshly ground, adding considerable kick. Very impressive. Judge # 2 -- Chili using shredded beef, could use more tomato. Must admit the jalapeno peppers make a strong statement. Judge # 3 -- My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted, and four people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from the pitcher. I wonder if I'm burning my lips off. It really ticks me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming. Screw them.
CHILI # 6 - VARGA'S VERY VEGETARIAN VARIETY Judge # 1 -- Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spices and peppers. Judge # 2 -- The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, garlic. Superb. Judge # 3 -- My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous, sulfuric flames. I crapped on myself when I farted, and I'm worried it will eat through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that Sally. Can't feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my butt with a snow cone..
CHILI # 7 - SUSAN'S SCREAMING SENSATION CHILI Judge # 1 -- A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers. Judge # 2 -- Ho hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chili peppers at the last moment. **I should take note that I am worried about Judge #3. He appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably. Judge # 3 -- You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel a thing. I've lost sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili, which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava to match my shirt. At least during the autopsy, they'll know what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing.. It's too painful. Screw it; I'm not getting any oxygen anyway.. If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the 4-inch hole in my stomach.
CHILI # 8 - BIG TOM'S TOENAIL CURLING CHILI Judge # 1 -- The perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili. Not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence. Judge # 2 -- This final entry is a good, balanced chili. Neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge #3 farted, passed out, fell over and pulled the chili pot down on top of himself.. Not sure if he's going to make it. Poor fella, wonder how he'd have reacted to really hot chili? Judge # 3 -- No report.
0 -
babs, hilarious!!!!! laughing and crying at the same time!!!
0 -
Thanks Babs...good laugh...sitting at the breakfast table off the family room laughing hysterically while my family thinks I have lost my mind.
Maggie
0 -
Inmate - I am just so sorry you are going through this. Wishing you well.
Babs - loved it!
Riley - happy cats, too cute.
~~~~~~~~~
Today I am on the soft food diet, tomorrow colon prep, colonoscopy Tuesday. I hope I don't know what's going on or remember it.0 -
Inmate and Survivor2 Be....hugs to you both..so so sorry this is happening again. Fuel yourselves with our collective strength. You can do this.
Babs37...wow..a good laugh
Titan..so true...we read all the posts but soemtimes miss someone..everyone please keep asking until you get the info you need.
Riley 702....great pics..I am hoping to get a kitten once radiation is over and after we sell our house.
Dutcherman...so glad you can take advantage of oncology massage. I have a woman come and give me one at home every 2 weeks. It is fortunately funded by the town I am in.
LJ ...David sure is gonig to be busy. I have saved his number. I am so happy for you and keep healing.
Suze 35...would love to hear how your visit to the spirtualist with your BFF is going..wishing all is well tomorrow.
I thought I posted 2 days ago but think it never ended up posting... ..we did get an offer on our house and a second offer came in today. Inspection tomorrow so fingers crossed that all goes well and our house sells.
MJB....hope your arm is feeling a bit better. Was it the moving that did it? Not looking forward to our commute once we move but certainly needing to own only one house.
New painting....trying to figure out how to put it here.
0 -
Hello all,
I don't post much but I do follow all y'all. It is such a nice place to connect with others! I did get a little bomb last week, but I'm so proud of myself for how I'm handling it. I started a blog, so if anyone wants a peek, come on over! fightlikeandrea.blogspot.com
TEKA: I'm wishing 11/17 is over and done with soon. I have a feeling procedure #8 will be the knock-down one!
Doesn't that seem strange!! Before this whole BC crap, I was horribly afraid of surgery (I'm a L&D nurse and those C-S scared me!!!!) But now, wow: biopsy, port placement, BMX, ALND, TE, fills, biopsy, port replacement...... What's to phase you know?? Isn't that a testiment to all we women have accomplished and made it through, mentally stronger and physically thougher? Not to mention chemo, radiation. We are some POWERFUL bodies!
Stay strong ladies!
0 -
survivor2be i fel the same way about needles, surgeries and the like. i figure whatever they are gonna do it won't kill me, have at it. my favorite is when you hear "you're gonna feel a little prick". like it need to be warned about that. makes me giggle every time.
thank you everyone for you words of support. my birthday wish is for everyone to see how wonderful life is and enjoy each and every moment, even the shitty ones. but i raise my glass to less shitty ones!
what can i say...it's early! have a wonderful day!
0 -
Sorry to hear about the difficult situations inmate and survivor ar going through. I have gone through similar situation this year. I figured after unilateral masc., chemo and rad in 2009, finishing rad in Jan of 2010, that I would be done. Onc and supports were great and when all was done, "right now you are cancer free". Skipped PET scan last year and this year decided to have PET scan. Onc said it was a good idea. Feb of this year pet scan lit up in same area as the lymph nodes that were removed. In for lumpectomy in March, Dr. could not find it. In May, had radiologyst insert wires before going into hosp, again for lumpectomy. It was found. I was diligent in my three month blood tests, but unfortunately, it did not help. Not sure what is ahead. I am done this year, no more tests for now, I need to focus on the Holidays and deal with it next year.
0 -
Thanks, just needed to vent.
0 -
OK---I have been waiting WEEKS for a surgery date. Am I just antsy or is this normal? I feel as if I want to do something...anything...not just wait. What is a "normal" wait? Thanks ladies....
0 -
Three damned strong women, Survivor3be and Inmate and OliveO. I can't even imagine what you are going through! My hats off to all of you. Teka is right, we have to hold onto the good days.
I would like to just add a little story which greatly inspired me today. A very very popular, handsome as hell and highly famous Indian actor recently died. He was very famous in the 1970's. Learned that he was going through dialysis and died of kidney failure at age 79. Anyway, he was recorded a couple years back, saying "I go for dialysis 3 days a week and spend most of time at the hospital those 3 days, but I still get 4 days to spend as I wish,at home, having fun doing all the things I love to do. I get more time to spend having fun, than the 3 days, and I am totally fine with it". I thought he was such a positive man. Being so popular, so handsome at one time in your life, and then your beautiful body deceiving you later in your life. But yet he remained so positive till the end. I am the kind who would have looked at my old movies, my handsome body and become highly depressed wanting to go back to those days.
I found it really inspiring. All the days of our lives are not the same. Even today as you face these horrible problems, it will not remain the same, it has to change, and it will change. Sometimes change comes after some time, and the waiting is difficult, but just look back at our lives, we have gone through so many problems in our lives but things did change.
Hoping the best for each and every one of us who is on this unbelievably painful journey.
0 -
denjak - what is the reason you don't have a surgery date? I apologize for not remembering, have you had chemo yet? If not, then it is time to get on the phone and not give up until they give you a date, they can absolutely schedule something. Have you met with a medical oncologist yet? If so, it may be time to get them involved in getting surgery scheduled. But this is YOUR health, do not be afraid to push them to set a date. If you aren't happy with the response, I would start looking for a second opinion. You will hear the old "a few weeks won't matter" argument, but TN is no lazy ER+ tumor, and the faster out in my opinion, the better. Good luck!
Olive - I'm so sorry you had to join us, vent away! It sounds like your recurrence was still local, which is good! What chemo did you do the second time? Hang in there, and stick around to vent whenever you need.
Lovelyface - what a great story, thank you for sharing. It is very true - I may have down days in the future, but as long as I have up days too, then I feel content. I can still hug my kids, watch shows and read with them when I'm down, take them out when I'm up... And who cares if I have to wear a scarf, or move a little slower? Not them! You are kindhearted woman, Lovely.
Inmate and Survivor - thinking of you two today, let's kick some cancer a**! Survivor, counting down the days with you...
Painting - that is so great about the house, wonderful! Keeping fingers crossed that all goes well. I'm going to go back and check out your latest painting in a few
.
~~~~~
Had a great weekend with my BFF. We finally had time to really talk, without the kids around, and it was something we needed to do. The medium was very interesting! I'll write more about it later, but on a positive note, she feels I have more time than I think, and to keep up with the complimentary stuff I'm doing, it is the right thing. She feels I have a lot of living still left to do - and I agree! So it was a pleasant reminder for me to keep fighting.
I am sitting in the waiting room to have my CT done, but I probably won't hear anything until Wed morning when I see the doctor. I am expecting some progression, so I really don't mind waiting another day to hear. Amazing how I've learned patience in this journey, I never thought I ever would, lol.
Have a great day everyone!0 -
Hope you are all doing well. I had a big scar and went in for a bone scan because my hip had been really bothering me for a few weeks and my doc thought maybe bone mets. Nope, just some arthritis. I never thought I would say yea to having some arthritis at 38 years old, but compared to the alternative I will take it...
0
