August 2010...anyone starting chemo besides me?!
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Yes I have lots of bloating.In my display pic. it is really noticeable to me, I'm the one with the dark wig, the other is my oldest daughter. I have gained 15 lb. since July, I really dont like it.
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Amelia: you are more than welcome to join us. Just so you know, someone and perhaps even you, can start a thread for December chemo starters. You should not be shy about starting it yourself. If you have any questions about how to start it, send me a private message and I will explain. I will not be done until the end of December and then I am on to some more surgeries and then rads probably late Spring. More to this point, most of us are going to be around this thread for a while. Like I said, you are more than welcome.
Bloated face: yes, I get that as well. In fact, a creepy visitor a few weeks ago decided to tell me as much! I have gained 4 lbs since this started. The not-so-hidden "benefits" of chemo!!!!
Rachel: 90 minutes at the mall?!?! I would have fallen asleep AT the mall! I give you credit for being able to make it. Fatigue remains my enemy, too. I don't wake up with a big agenda, either. Perhaps I am not so fatigued but I do like to take it easy. This is not a time in my life for itineraries and agendas. This is a time for rest and recovery and I am not pushing myself to do anything else. Why would I?! I am only fairly convinced I did not get this sick because of my resting and relaxing life style! I am moving to better health through rest and relaxation. The body needs time to recover.
Calamytkel: Trader Joe's is the place to spend lots of money! Good for you-
I hope you all had a nice day
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Rachel, Calamtykel, Noticed that you both had some lymph involvement. I guess that is the thing that has me worried. I had one biopsied before neoadjuvant chemo and it was positive. So I will not know until after surgery if this is the only one. Keep telling myself that it was not detected in the ultrasound, not found until MRI. When the radiologist called me after the MRI she said one looked a little "PLUMPER" than she would like and scheduled the biopsy. My oncologist doesn't seem to feel that it is anything to worry about. I always thought the lymphies meant a bad outcome. Am realizing from all of you that ain't necessarily so. Tell me what experience/info you have.
Chemo 5 did award me with the swoolen bloated red face
Beth
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amelia93 what a beautiful little boy! Sorry you've had to wait, I was so tired of waiting and anticipating all the potential side effects that I was actually looking forward to starting chemo by the time my start date rolled around. As Lizzy said you are welcome here. I saw there is a November 2010 chemo thread so you may want to check out there as well for people who are starting at the same time. I go to Jan 7 so I'll be in it a for a while and you can certainly join more than one chemo thread to get different prespectives. Good luck tomorrow, let us know how it goes!
Carolyn
ps I seem to be having a hard time recently, can't tell if it's the chemo, hormones (or lack of) or depression. Is anyone else feeling blue on Taxol? Any of you done with chemo find your mood is improving. Just particularly weepy this week and can't seem to snap out of it.
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I am so sad and teary eyed... I am dreading chemo Tuesday...UUUGGGHHH....
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Sohard - isn't this your last one?0
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Hi Beth--I had 1 lymph node involved--was one of the sentinel nodes---all other were clear after biopsy during surgery. My Doc actually did feel the one lymph node before surgery and did mention that it seemed to be inflammed--and ultimately that was the one with the cancer indicated! Originally, I was upset that the lymph node had cancer because that determined chemo for me. Lymph node involvement doesn't mean bad outcomes---just means that the treatment plan is generally more aggressive (i.e. chemo). I had one sentinel node positive...Doc told me to think of the nodes as a drainage system and if cancer is found--then the node did its job....unfortunately, this did mean that chemo was a MUST for me.
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amelia93 it could be chemopause. Be sure and let your onc know. You might need meds for a while to get through this. Many women do.0
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Rachel Thanks for your words of support.I was chemo bound anyway since I'm HER2 pos. Oncologist said the same thing you did that lymph node involvement earns you a ticket to chemo. I am trying not to become extremely paranoid about this. I'm going to try to think positively about this i.e. fat pad removed from underarm:)Beth
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Sohardbnme: we have to go again this week
I don't know if I am getting nauseous and I don't want to eat anything. It has been like this for days. I don't know what the heck to do during chemo if I am already feeling like I am sick. Woe is me! I don't even like Boost anymore. I hope we have a good week, pal! May the force be with us!Libraylil: when I told family and friends I had lymph node involvement they immediately acted like death was imminent. Conventional wisdom said if it got to the nodes that it hit the highway to help it spread. Even when my father had lung cancer, I was in my 20's but really knew nothing of cancer. I remember my stepmother praying, each time he had a test, that it did not get into his nodes. She explained node involvement was a very bad sign. That was 11 years ago. I guess things have come a long way since then. I had 2 nodes involved of 18 and the sentinel was totally eradicated by cancer and I had extra capsular extension from the sentinel. No one in the medical field acts like it is an awful thing anymore. Perhaps they have learned more about it or it was never the bad sign that portends of such terrible things? I don't know. It used to be an ominous sign but I don't get that impression anymore. Like most things cancer, WHO KNOWS?!?!?
I hope everyone has a good week. Don't worry be happy
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This week in lieu of a poem we are going to enjoy the lyrics of "Don't Worry, Be Happy" from the great Bobby McFerrin
Here is a little song I wrote
You might want to sing it note for note
Don't worry be happy
In every life we have some trouble
When you worry you make it double
Don't worry, be happy......
Ain't got no place to lay your head
Somebody came and took your bed
Don't worry, be happy
The land lord say your rent is late
He may have to litigate
Don't worry, be happy
Lood at me I am happy
Don't worry, be happy
Here I give you my phone number
When you worry call me
I make you happy
Don't worry, be happy
Ain't got no cash, ain't got no style
Ain't got not girl to make you smile
But don't worry be happy
Cause when you worry
Your face will frown
And that will bring everybody down
So don't worry, be happy (now).....
There is this little song I wrote
I hope you learn it note for note
Like good little children
Don't worry, be happy
Listen to what I say
In your life expect some trouble
But when you worry
You make it double
Don't worry, be happy......
Don't worry don't do it, be happy
Put a smile on your face
Don't bring everybody down like this
Don't worry, it will soon past
Whatever it is
Don't worry, be happy0 -
Hi all! I've just been catching up after spending a few days north of here with DH. I had hoped to do a lot of walking and hiking, because that is what we love to do together, but I was just exhausted most of the time. I walk at the pace of an 80-year-old with a hip problem. I think DH is getting as tired of this as I am.
I also had a full-blown anxiety attack. I've had a few of them before, but this time, I took an Ativan which put me right to sleep, but it totally took care of the anxiety. I'm waiting for the results of my latest MUGA scan, because the Herceptin can have an effect on the heart, and I spent the first day and a half convinced that I was having a heart attack. The bizarre thing is that I knew it was probably an anxiety attack, but I couldn't make the chest pains go away. Which made me still think that it could be a real heart problem. After I took the Ativan on Saturday afternoon, and took a nap, no more chest pains. I also slept A LOT on this little 3 day trip. I suppose I needed it.
I go in for my FINAL TCH treatment tomorrow. DH is coming with me. He came to the first and he is coming to the last. I wish he could stay longer, but he is going back to work tomorrow evening and won't be home until Friday. I asked one friend to come hang out with me during the week, but she is too busy and can't. So, now I'm afraid to ask anyone else - I always feel like if I don't ask, I can't be disappointed in people. But, at the same time I don't want to be alone all week, so I will have to ask. As much as I am glad to be getting to the last TCH, I still don't want to go through it all again.
Watery Eyes: Driving me crazy. I didn't find the drops to be very helpful, but I only tried it for a day or so. Maybe I need to use them on a regular basis. But the really annoying thing is that the watery eyes make it impossible to keep make-up on!
Brows & Lashes: I'm about to go into Tx no. 6, and my brows and lashes are thinning, and much lighter color than before, but they are not all gone.
Blood Sugar: I have Type 1 Diabetes, and I would think that temporarily, if you can test your own blood sugar, watch it for a while. The steroids really wreak havoc with my blood sugars, but after about 5 days they are pretty close to normal again. I am only on 1 IV dose of dexamethasone, though - if you are taking oral steroids, it might last a little longer. If your blood sugar is high (over 100) for more than a week, I would really consider consulting a doctor.
Sending out lots of healing vibes to everyone getting tx's this week. SoHard, I'm totally with you - I don't want to go either, but we will get through this! WE WILL!
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I still feel bad, my hands hurt, knees, wrists, forearms, espcially, throat dries up, I hope this is going to pass now. I have 7 days until next chemo and an out of town friend coming next Saturday. I would like to enjoy his visit.He works for the mission I am a long time volyunteer for. He spent earth quake day rescuing teen agers, from a school that collapsed in front of him, with his bare hands.He is brave,and answers God's call when it comes it. I dont think he sees himslef as brave but I know he is. He provided comfort to girls who were not going to come out, ever, he rescued 6 that day, but the one he couldnt haunts him I think. He got baclk to our base and brought back thirteen worked and our generators and tools, they rescued many more. I am proud he is my friend.
Calamity how are you doing? Texas Rose , Iowa Sue everybody, too. Anybody doing chem o yet. I bought Emu oil, and Rosehips oil. My communication is a big mess on this Oxy.
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Good morning Chemosabes! And welcome, Amelia!
My face is as round as a pie pan! I've gained fifteen pounds since the beginning of chemo. Everyone on my team is happy about it, because I was underweight to start with, but I'm not happy. And with my lymphedema causing so much swelling, I feel like the Stay-Puff Marshmallow Man. And to top it off, I'm not allowed to do any kind of aerobic exercise at all because of the lymphedema. I hate it! I was determined to keep up my running -- knowing, of course, that it wouldn't be very much running, and much slower than usual -- throughout my treatments. I was able to do it for a while, but then my arm started swelling, the my back, then my side, then my hand, then my boobless (that's what my dh and I call my mx side), so no ore running or even walking at anything other than a slow, leisurely pace.
My doc and my OT keep telling me that a lot of this is water, and that it will slowly go away once Tx is over, but I have three weeks in between Tx's and none of it even starts to go away in that time frame, so I'm skeptical.
Had an out-of-town house guest this weekend. We had a nice time, and it was wonderful to see her. But she's going through a divorce and I wasn't feeling at my best, so it was a little low key. But the really good news is that she accepted my invitation to come spend Christmas with us! Yay! I've invited my parents, but know yet if they are coming. Either way it will be nice to have Terasa, and even nicer if we have my parents too!
Final Tx is Wed. I'm definitely happy about that. Hope everyone is having a nice weekend. I know we're not all feeling that great, but even so, it's still possible to have some nice days. Hugs to all.
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Blood sugar- I have never had high until the last 2 chemos 3 weeks ago it was 140 and last Fri. it was 150. The nurse told me they don't worry about it until it gets to be a lot higher, whatever that is.
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Good morning chemosabes and radicals-
Hope you all had a nice weekend-
Blood Sugars: while on chemo and taking steroids, blood sugars go crazy. There is no way to manage it or avoid it. I go to Yale and they must process an enormous amount of cancer patients. They told me they have seen it go as high as 300+ and that they don't treat patients who never had diabetes, for diabetes, while on chemo and steroids. It would be a false positive. Don't worry about any blood sugar results while on chemo and steroids until your doctor does. I get blood drawn every week and I am sure you all do as well. They are drawing that blood so they can monitor what is going on with you. If anyone is concerned about blood glucose numbers, as your onc to add it to the weekly draws. After all they are taking the blood, you might as well get it tested for whatever you want. We all have quite enough to worry about without adding "non events" to our list!
I hope you all have a nice day today. This is tx week for some of us present company included...ugh!
Happy trails-
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Hi All...
Tomorrow is my last treatment...Then herceptin after that...I was told that Hercrptinalone is not as bad as chemo...
December 13th...Breast removal, delayed reconstruction...This is overwhelming...
You all are in my prayers...I am glad to have you all to vent to...
I'M OVERWHELMED...I just show up to all scheduled appointments...God got me...
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Good luck to all having treatments this week and special congrats to those having their last treatments this week! I have my first Abraxane this Friday and I'm getting anxious about what the SE's will be. I had a lot of nausea with the AC and my onc tells me that should not be a problem this round but I am still worried. He is not giving me any Emend this time (though it only worked so-so for the AC) or any other anti-nausea meds but I do still have some left over Zofran and Marinol in case I need them. I did manage to get a good bit of cleaning & organizing done around the house this weekend (in between watching football) so I am happy about that.
Lymph Nodes - My docs did not feel any lymph node involvement or see any on the MRI but in the end it turned out there were cancerous cells in almost half of my lymph nodes. So that meant chemo for me. As others have said I prefer to think that it just means that the lymph nodes were doing their job and protecting the rest of my body and that it is not necessarily a negative thing. Long-term survival rates seem to be on the rise and with all of the treatment I am getting I hope to be around for a long time yet!
Sohard - I was on Herceptin alone for about a month before my chemo got started and it really was so much easier than chemo. Really all I noticed was that I would get a headache after the infusion. Other than that I felt fine and some Aleve took care of the headache. So hopefully the Herceptin alone will be just as easy for you as it was for me.
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jsw I had alot of nausea with A/C, took zofran every day until a full two weeks after it was all done. Now I really don't have any nausea on the Taxol, do get some aversions but think it may just take a while for me to 'forget' all the stuff that made me queasy during AC. Hope you do well on the abraxane
Carolyn
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Sohard - Big hug to you! I will be thinking of you this week and hope that you don't feel too bad!!!!0
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Lib: LN involvement means the cells were caught by the lymph node and can circulate in the body. Be aware also though that even with NO LN involvement, this can and does sometimes happen, through just the blood stream.
But LN involvement puts you at higher risk of it being elsewhere since lymph fluid moves around the body. It doesn't mean a death sentence though. I asked my oncologlist to level with me - tell me what the odds are, etc. She told me with 2 nodes of 12 involved that having chemo puts me down to the same risk as someone with no LN involvement and no chemo. I believe her - I don't believe she would lie to me. My cousin had LN involvement and had chemo and has been fine. That was 21 years ago, in 1989. The more nodes involved, plus the bigger the tumor, obviously, the "higher" the stage of the cancer. Mine was a IIa based on all the different things that they added up regarding the tumors (the initial one plus whatever was in the nodes.)
I knew my sentinel node was involved because that is what I felt under my arm. Neither me, nor my gyn nor my breast surgeon could feel the lump in the breast - it was very small with clean margins. The MRI did not show the lymph node; the ultrasound did. The mammogram also did not show the lymph node, but did show what they thought was microcalcifications in the breast. My lump was very small. I can't remember if it was under 1 cm or not. I was told after the mammo to just go for an MRI and that I was probably fine. I was told by the radiologist not to "worry" about the lymph node lump - that it was just a cyst and not worth biopsying.
Obviously if I had believed him I would be in serious trouble right now. Instead, I took all my films (and I will NOT return them to that hospital!) and sought on a breast surgeon for a biopsy.
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Lizzy: Thank you for the song
It brings back a nice memory. Shortly after diagnosis I was at my daughter's school, they were putting on a play, and there was a class that performed a dance to that song. We came home and took a dip in the pool and I was extremely silly dancing and singing that song in the pool. That was a nice day for me. Weight and exercise: I know I should have kept exercising during chemo but I did not. I took that hour as my extra rest time since I've not stopped working and I also have elementary aged children. 3 months of no running. And now AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. It is so hard to start it up again. But I'm determined to get back to my old self and I will be patient. I'm able to run 1 mile without stopping now
and then I run/walk 2 more. But the scale is NOT budging. I'm okay with that for now. I think my body is nervous since it has been through so much lately and it does not want to let go of any pounds. I just need the Florida weather to get colder so I can wear sweats all the time since my other clothes DO NOT FIT. I would like to think it is water, but when you normally run 5 miles a day and stop for 3 months and when you can't eat anything for a week and then allow yourself to eat whatever you want for the next 2 weeks ... well, it has to be more than just water.I'm officially a radical now. Treatment #1 of #28 today. It was really fast and uneventful. My tissue expanders feel tight today but I think that is just psychological. The rads don't go near my left foob and it is feeling just as tight as the right. I absolutely hate the TE. Had a dream last night that I had the plastic surgery done and was feeling so good to not have TE anymore.
Good wishes to all of you with a treatment this week. And feeling better wishes for all of you with SE right now.
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Sohard - I know it's overwhelming, but I think you've been through the worst of this. I had a mastectomy one side; reduction on the other. I don't feel that was the difficult part (and I'm a BIG baby about surgery!) The drains and all were weird, but I picked berries with my kids 48 hours later.
Most hospitals hospital are wonderful for taking care of BC patients - they pamper you! And the reconstruction will come....they'll take it slow, etc, and you'll be okay.Hang in there - you've been through a LOT and now the end is in sight!
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THANKSGIVING: Anybody having chemo Thanksgiving week? I'm having it Monday - no neulasta so I don't want to go to my SIL's and be in a crowd especially with the colds going around. I was going to cook for just my familiy here. I am hoping for Tuesday when I'm on the steroids.
It shouldn't be "too" hard......thinking of what I can make ahead. Anyone cooking this year?
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Thanks you all for the positive feedback and encouraging words...
I have to walk around without breast until next summer... CANCER is insidious... It came and took over my life...
I plan to get a diep flap six months after radiation...
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Cal - We're avoiding the crowds too. DH is making the turkey and DD and I will fill in the rest. I think Sara Lee is making the pumpkin pie!0
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Sohard- big hugs your way!
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Hi Ladies, I will be having my last of three mini infusions and my last of 4 chemos on Wed. the day before Thanksgiving. Gives a whole new meaning to the day this year. I will be off to the rad oncologist on Dec. 2nd. The first time I had the weekly minis the second round there were little or no SEs but this last mini kicked me in the arse. Swollen ankles and feet, that hungover feeling without the good times and just plain sucky, can't wait for this Wed. Oh yes I can. I am sooo over this whole thing as I know you all are. If I hear one more time how good I look bald I am most likely to go off the deep end and murder someone. I hope Gloria Allred isn't too busy because this truely would be justifiable homicide. This freaking journey is getting way too long and my wish is that we all get to the finish line standing up. Going to my eldest son's for T.G. and will trust in Costco to furnish what I'm supposed to bring. Talk at you all later.
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kel, I'm cooking for Thanksgiving. Just my parents and my FIL and SIL are coming. they sleep over which my son is thrilled about, and it's usually the only holiday we're home for so I want to keep things normal this year.
sohard I'm sorry you have to wait for reconstruction, hope it's here before you know it. sending you hugs
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hardbnme..... sorry I have a hard time calling you sohard. LOL I know slap me silly. I agree the hardest part for most of us seams to be chemo, Lucky for me that had been pretty doable can't wait until Dec. to get that lasr one out of the way. I had a bilmx and the recovery wasn'tso bad , I was out to wal mart ( LOL yes I shop there) and to get groceries. I didn't miss the boobs at first and even thought about not getting reconstruction, but seriously I'm tired of wearing mastectomy bras the double one are heavy to lug around, I know my own were not heavy. So I too will be having reconstruction. hopefully spring time. I want to be done in time for summer, I have to get back out and ski. Thinking of summer already when we just had 4 in. of snow : ( I know i need to live somewheere warm!!! I am thinking DIEP will be the surgery for me.
I have appointments up the ying yang over the next 3 wks. BS( for this lump) Thur.18th, herceptin Fri. 19th, Tue.23rd radiologist onc. Fri. 26th herceptin and finally last chemo Dec.2nd. That in itself is exhausting. I am hoping the radiologist says no radiation, that would be no fun to try to get to appointments 5 x5 in Jan. in Iowa, but if I have to I will be there!!!
I hope everyone gets back to normal real soon!!!
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