You know youre a cancer patient when....
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you know your a cancer patient when you buy new underwear at CVS because you are too tired to do laundry....
(yes ladies, I'm single)
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I love the 50 year old balding guy comment!! LOL!!!
when your husband's friend, who is staying the night, tells you how good you look (he and his wife thought I would look worse). So you decide not to ruin his lovely image of you and take a shower and put on your wig before going downstairs the next morning!
Only my family and backyard neighbors get to see the 50 year old balding guy image of me! when your friend (same guy) tells you that his 9 year old daughter cut her hair off and donated it to Locks of Love "to give Heather her hair" - this has to be the sweetest thing I have heard.
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You realise you have way too much time on your hands when instead of just hanging up on the telemarketers/con-people that call and you actually challenge them by asking heaps of questions about who they are actually calling from and where.......I actually had one of them hang up on ME!!
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I've been having a hard time keeping up on this topic! So many great posts and so many that I can relate to! To think I used to think it was crazy that they would list constipation and diarrhea as side effects of a med. I mean, how could you possibly have both?? Now I know....
You know you're a cancer patient when your insurance company has paid more money for your treatment than you have in your 401K. Sigh.
You know you're a cancer patient when you can use the cancer card at the ER and get the last bed in the hospital for the night. Even beat out the cardio patient. The others had to get transported 20 miles to the next hospital.
You know you're a cancer patient when your stuck in the hospital and your first hair appointment in over a year is scheduled for 4:30 and you are ready to lie, bribe or cry (whatever it takes!) when your PCP comes in to check on you to see if you're ready to be discharged.
You know you're a cancer patient when your favorite book is a cartoon book called "Laugh Away Cancer Blues". Every page pokes fun at the author's 5 year battle with multiple myleoma. It's a hoot!
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............you are cynically suspicious of every pink/cancer/sponsorships/research related charity that pops up/rings/knocks on your door, has booths every where you shop. This cynicism has taken a quantum leap due to press reports that only 5% of all donations actually go to the cause research.
Color me ungrateful but, the fact that we are all here waiting patiently after all the years and $$$'s raised world-wide, still looking for a cure for the major cancers, let alone the childhood variety, which should be top of the list.
Sheila.
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...when you dread the month of October because all the pink bulls^^t is everywhere reminding you of your cancer constantly. The pink is even on toilet paper so now it is "wipe for a cure". I want money going for prevention!!!!!
Peace, Love, and Blessings to all, Patty
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You rock DancerMel!
Patty, a line needs to be drawn and and the line starts at "wiping for a cure". Really. If any one from outside the sisterhood knew about all the bathroom issues, they wouldn't do pink paper.
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I was showing my DD how hard my MX side was and trying to explain why because she forgets and comes runnning up and hits me there. I tell her when I get my fake boob, it will be okay and it will be much softer. To her reply....will it be as gushy as your real boob when I lay my head on it?
When your childs Ped's and dentist seem more concern about you than they do your DD. Intresting enough her ped's Dr.'s mom is currently in treatment for BC and her Dentist's Dad had some type of cancer. I swear cancer is everywhere now days.
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...when you are out in public and find yourself checking out every woman's short hair do and wondering 1) how it will look on you (I'm 12 weeks PFC) and 2) whether it's "on purpose" or if she had chemo!
...when you try to use your "cancer card" to buy dinner for your father, sister, her family and the waiter DENIES it because your father already gave him his VISA, is a good customer and they don't want to make him mad! I was wearing a headwrap, pointed to it and said come on, please, I had cancer and want to buy my family dinner for all they've done for me. Still, he said no. After dinner, my dad said to me, well you didn't try to use your gift card tonight. I replied, I tried to use my cancer card, my gift card and my credit card and they were all DENIED!
Gina
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...when you spend the afternoon talking to your BC friends about upcoming RADS and totally forget about your Rad Onc appointment. Happened yesterday! Dang! Hope they can get me in again.
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Dancermel - sounds like an entertainming game: see how many minutes it takes to get the telemarketer to hang up on you! I'm going to keep a stop watch and paper by the phone to log those calls!0
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when so many doctors have advised you that most women are asymmetrical that you start to actively look for these women even though your DH has been forbidden to look below the chin
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after a week of insomnia you put some concealer under your eyes and your DH says "you look rested!"
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....when you would actually buy the 'wipe for the cure' pink TP - as you go so much, your donation alone could raise enough funds for a cure. (not to mention, it seems quite befitting of your attitude toward the pretty in pink bouncy 'never gave up'ers - full of $hit)
....when October comes around, you hide everything you own that is pink and are thankful your fur-child has a black nose.
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DancerMel, what a brilliant idea. Maybe we should all do that, think of the impact. I can just see the headlines now: Army of BC Warriors brings Telemarketing World to Its Knees!
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You know you're a cancer patient when: You look forward to the weekend so you can finally clean your damn dirty house and when it finally gets here you're to damn tired from working all week. So you let it go for another week and think okay maybe next weekend.
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You know you're a cancer patient when you bring your dog to his Vet and the first question the Vet asks is "How are you doing" instead of "What's going on with Spencer".
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KittyKat, Darn house guests! Now you have all that upkeep!!!
DancerMel, dutchgirl- you guys have me seriously cracking up!!! Too funny!!
Leisaparis, I say just forget about the housework and enjoy your weekends!
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You know you're a cancer patient when for the first time since you filled a C cup you're comfortable appearing in public without a bra.
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.....when your causal friend couldn't recognize you because you have hair now.
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When you're having a absolute complete emotional breakdown and major melt down, call for an emergency appt with your therapist (who you haven't seen in three months bec you can't afford it) and the first thing he says when he sees you is.....is that your real hair? This happened this morning!
in therapy today as we were trying to talk about my fear of having a double mastectomy...my male therapist suddenly thinks it is OK to stare at my boobs because they need therapy too. (F*ck Freud!)
And when you paid 150.00 for 50 minutes and you come home and still have to eat a half gallon of ice cream! XXOO, SV
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You know you are a cancer patient when your small company changes health insurance plans and you wonder if the money savings needed in the company - indeed, the high cost of everyone's new premiums -- are due to YOUR exorbitant medical bills. Not funny, sorry - can't think of anything as wonderful as the laughs I have gotten here.
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Athena, I've wondered the same thing as the ins. policy premiums are going to double next month at the small company I work for.
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...when you arrive for mastectomy / sentinel node biopsy with your breasts slathered in (generic) Emla cream and your torso wrapped in plastic wrap, and totally flip out the rad tech who's going to inject the radioactive tracer. He'd never seen THAT before!
{{{ SV }}}
edit to add an explanation - I had put the numbing cream on an hour before I showed up at the hospital, then wrapped myself in the plastic wrap to 1) keep that goo off my clothes, and 2) hold the active ingredients close to my skin, like when the beautician puts a plastic cap on your head during a dye job, to let the color soak in good. I am soooo glad I did that, I'm a total weenie about pain. The radioactive shots didn't hurt, and my last impression of my breasts wasn't ow ow ow! LOL!! badger
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you can't find the key to the wine fridge
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You lock your wine fridge?
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started locking up the wine after 17YO took a bottle of vintage brut Cristal to the beach
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Ouch! Probably worth more than my parents' Plymouth Valiant that my then-17 YO brother took to the beach and wrecked 40+ years ago LOL!
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OMG ROTFLMAO-on the wine fridge!!! And I have 22 years sober-when you truly know there is not enough alcohol in the world to fix what is going on with me. SV
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Still LOL, these are so great!!
You know you are a cancer patient when the pharmacist actually comes down from behind the counter when you are picking up your meds to give them to you and asks how you are doing.
When you pay ZERO for your meds because you have reached your catastrophic cap.
When you go to pick up your husband's wedding band that was being resized because he put on some much needed weight, and the jeweler (while watching your 2 young boys being a little rowdy, and you with a bandana on, and pale because you can't go out in the sun) kindly says, "don't worry about it" and tears come to your eyes at the kindness of others!
Oh, and last but not least.... chemo farts!!!
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