You know youre a cancer patient when....
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Astorm - your bed sounds like mine (except I don't need the pillows anymore - that was for the reconstruction last year). I have a couple cats that usually like to sleep next to me (hubby moves too much at night). Then, our dog Bear sometimes sleeps with us, all 40 lbs of border collie madness. I started putting my Ativan in the nightstand, so I don't have to go downstairs, when I forget to take it! I get so mad when I forget my bottle of water!!!
when you get p'od at whatever man in the chemo suite leaves the seat up in the bathroom. Really???
when you think it's funny that 2 of your friends got in the newspaper (they're doing an article on our onco). Then, you narrowly escape the camera crew yourself because the chemo nurses tipped you off that they arrived, as you were leaving!
when you think it's cool that you can give your chemo nurse advice & encouragement on getting a lump in her breast. I hope it's benign!!!!
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YKYACPW... you pull up to the AT&T store because your cell phone quit working and you start to say a little prayer that they'll give you a new phone without a big hassle or expense. But before you can finish the thought, your mind turns to a chemo-sister who is having a scan today, and you realize how totally unimportant your cell phone problem is, and you sit there praying for your bc-sister...
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when you think you are not up with the times because you don't know what YKYACPW means. You think it's a new acronym like LMAO. Then... you realize that you really have chemo brain because you just figured out it means "you know you're a cancer patient when..."
LOL!!!! Chemo brain is real!!!
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HI Kittycat,
Thanks for explaining that one, I've seen it a few times over the last few days and just couldn't figure it out, and it's 21 months since I finished chemo!!! The Femara keeps the chemobrain syndrome going - it's so true chemo brain is real & I forgot again to take me little orange pill this morning.
Got my follow up onc appointment today and for some reason I am anxious. I had my annual mammogram & ultrasound a little while ago and I haven't had the results. I hope no news is good news but last time they waited to tell me there was something suspicious, turned out to be nothing but they wanted to keep an eye on it, so now I'm paranoid!
YKYACPW .... you go for your mammogram & ultrasound and the tech wishes you GOOD LUCK as you leave, and you become paranoid about the results.
Best wishes everyone!!
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Thanks Kitty for clearing that up I wasn't sure if it was a fellow BC babe or and acronym as well...
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YKYACPW - you take a nasty fall and hit your head, have to go to the ER for stitches, and the ER DR orders a brain CT scan (to be sure there is no subdural hematoma) and all you think is "oh good, this will rule out the brain tumor I worry about in the middle of the night."
I love all you guys and your spirit. You always make my day. How is it you can make me cry and laugh at the same time?
pam
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YKYACPW- you can laugh and cry at the same time! Sometimes daily!
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"YKYACPW" -- wow, not only are we keeping up with the times, we are creating them!
prayer... you find yourself praying for good foobs. Can you really pray for foobs? I say yes. And it works.
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Lowrider- I think Designer Mom has hit on a 1st rate idea for a TV show. I can just see all of you at the dinner table and scooter hubby zipping up and down with zany little quips thrown in. Start a journal and then maybe send it to Hollywood. We would all watch it!!!! TOO FUNNY!!! Someone needs to come up with a catchy name for the show.
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Oh, and I thought YNYACPW was the name of someone posting and I could not find them anywhere. What a ninny I am. That is so funny I may fall of the couch. My dog thinks I have totally lost it because I am typing and hysterically laughing.f
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OK, good news - mammo and ultrasound all clear, we are going to wait and see results of bone density scan next March before making any decision on treatment to resolve loss of bone density and I only need go for 6 mnthly check ups from now on - hurray!!!
Gaynor
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YKYACPW gee lol I don't remember seeing that.
glad your scans where clear Gaynor.
YKYACPW you think it is funny seeing Kate plus 8 espisode where all the kids and crew got sea sick. Not sure why I find pure joy in that. lol
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......when you are at an AA meeting bitching about the coffee not perking fast enough and decide to be clever and pull the pot out anyway to fill your cup....then start talking feeling so pleased with yourself to get over on the coffee pot....only to realize,,,,the driper thingy has no stop if the pot is pulled out and coffee is now flooding the floor of the church! And you stand there just staring at it until someone says 'back away from the pot and go sit down" and they clean it up for you because they know you are chemotarded.
....and damned, we've already put together 36 pages. I though someone actually counted until I just realized there are page numbers at the bottom!! Chemotard and i love the Chemo fart-remind me never to bunk with another BC survivor!!
.....people keep telling you that you are absolutely beautiful but its only bec your hair has gone from bald to and inch long in 9 months! XXOO, SV
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Gaynor Great news on the results
lead in....ok, so my prospective boss calls me & we are talking about wearing street clothes on the job (t shirts in particular) ......
ykyacpw......your prospective boss is stammering & stumbling over the words nothing 'revealing or offensive' & you get to fill in the blanks for him LMAO !!! #1 he seemed chemo'd # 2 wouldn't they CRAP if I did. ( I am 1 sided )
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Gaynor 0
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YKYACPW... out doing an errand this evening, you pass a coffee shop where you enjoyed meeting another BCO-sister several months ago, prior to her surgery... and you suddenly remember that she had PM'd you last week and invited you to lunch -- yesterday. On top of that, you know she didn't do chemo, so you're worried that she may not even understand your chemotard excuse for completely spacing out her invitation.
YKYACPW... a client calls and asks if you're sending something he thinks he asked you to send earlier in the week. You spend the rest of the day wondering what happened, because it's not simply something you forgot to do, it's something you have absolutely no recollection of even discussing! And you're left wondering, which one of us is the chemotard? Do I assume it's me, or am I just paranoid and maybe he actually forgot to ask me?
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YKYACPW...you convince yourself that you have a tumor in your nose because you can see it. Then you realize you're looking at normal nose bone and the reason you can see it is because you have no nose hair.
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I just had to post this. It sounds like both of these people could be chemotarded.Lizard babies
Saw this on a work related forum I visit and was ROFLMAO. Hope no one has seen it before.
Overview: I had to take my son's lizard to the vet.
Here's what happened:
Just after dinner one night, my son came up to tell me there was "something wrong" with one of the two lizards he holds prisoner in his room.
"He's just lying there looking sick," he told me. "I'm serious dad, can you help?"
I put my best lizard-healer statement on my face and followed him into his bedroom. One of the little lizards was indeed lying on his back, looking stressed. I immediately knew what to do.
"Honey," I called, "come look at the lizard!"
"Oh my gosh," my wife diagnosed after a minute. "She's having babies."
"What?" my son demanded. "But their names are Bert and Ernie, Mom!"
I was equally outraged.
"Hey, how can that be? I thought we said we didn't want them to reproduce," I accused my wife.
"Well, what do you want me to do, post a sign in their cage?" she inquired. (I actually think she said this sarcastically!)
"No, but you were supposed to get two boys!" I reminded her, (in my most loving, calm, sweet voice, while gritting my teeth together).
"Yeah, Bert and Ernie!" my son agreed.
"Well, it's just a little hard to tell on some guys, you know," she informed me. (again with the sarcasm, you think?)
By now the rest of the family had gathered to see what was going on. I shrugged, deciding to make the best of it.
"Kids, this is going to be a wondrous experience, I announced. "We're about to witness the miracle of birth."
"Oh, gross!" they shrieked.
"Well, isn't THAT just great! What are we going to do with a litter of tiny little lizard babies?" my wife wanted to know. (I really do think she was being snotty here, too. Don't you?)
We peered at the patient. After much struggling, what looked like a tiny foot would appear briefly, vanishing a scant second later.
"We don't appear to be making much progress," I noted.
"It's breech," my wife whispered, horrified.
"Do something, Dad!" my son urged.
"Okay, okay." Squeamishly , I reached in and grabbed the foot when it next appeared, giving it a gentle tug. It disappeared. I tried several more times with the same results.
"Should I call 911," my eldest daughter wanted to know. "Maybe they could talk us through the trauma." (You see a pattern here with the females in my house?)
"Let's get Ernie to the vet," I said grimly.
We drove to the vet with my son holding the cage in his lap. "Breathe, Ernie, breathe," he urged.
"I don't think lizards do Lamaze," his mother noted to him. (Women can be so cruel to their own young. I mean what she does to me is one thing, but this boy is of her womb, for God's sake.)
The Vet took Ernie back to the examining room and peered at the little animal through a magnifying glass.
"What do you think, Doc, a C-section?" I suggested scientifically.
"Oh, very interesting," he murmured. "Mr. and Mrs. Cameron, may I speak to you privately for a moment?"
I gulped, nodding for my son to step outside.
"Is Ernie going to be okay?" my wife asked.
"Oh, perfectly," the Vet assured us. "This lizard is not in labor. In fact, that isn't EVER going to happen... Ernie is a boy. You see, Ernie is a young male. And occasionally, as they come into maturity, like most male species, they um....um....masturbate. Just the way he did, lying on his back." He blushed, glancing at my wife. "Well, you know what I'm saying, Mr. Cameron."
We were silent, absorbing this.
"So Ernie's just...just... excited," my wife offered.
"Exactly," the vet replied, relieved that we understood.
More silence. Then my vicous, cruel wife started to giggle. And giggle. And then even laugh loudly.
"What's so funny?" I demanded, knowing, but not believing that the woman I married would commit the upcoming affront to my flawless manliness.
Tears were now running down her face. Laughing "It's just...that...I'm picturing you pulling on its... its...teeny little..." she gasped for more air to bellow in laughter once more.
"That's enough," I warned. We thanked the Vet and hurriedly bundled the lizards and our son back into the car. He was glad everything was going to be okay.
"I know Ernie's really thankful for what you've done, Dad," he told me.
"Oh, you have NO idea,"
Closed mouth, my wife agreed, collapsing with laughter.
2 - Lizards - $140...
1 - Cage - $50...
Trip to the Vet - $30...
Memory of your husband pulling on a lizard's
winkie.....Priceless
Moral of the story - finish biology class - lizards lay eggs!0 -
OMG...I was laughing the whole time. This is soooo funny. I could just see it, from the description. ROFLMAO
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I was laughing so hard the tears were rolling down my cheeks and I found it hard to read on. The word pictures are just great and the story....well that is just priceless.
YKYACPW....
All appointments, meetings, important phone calls, birthdays and visits with your family are all entered into your mobile phone calendar and the alarm set for each thing or else everything is forgotten.
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OMG mcbird, it's 5:15 am here and I'm trying not to wake up my DH LMAO at your story!
YKYACP when your night sweats give a whole new meaning to the "wet spot" in the bed.
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posted twice...BCO hiccuped
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YKYACPW you request the same day off work 2x cuz you forgot you already put in for it and they know you have chemo brain and just say yes twice instead of pointing it out to you and you finally realize it a month later and say something and they just laugh
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ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!
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OMG I am choking I am laughing so hard...that just made my day.
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YKYACPW
you know there was something you meant to do before driving to your rads appointment and you can't remember it, but when you're half way there the petrol light comes on and you realise that duh you had to get petrol!!!! Luckily I made it to next town but so stressful thinking I was going to be stuck on side of raod and end up being late for my appoinment.
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YKYACPW you think YKYACPW is someones screen name! did someone already say that? i know you guys were talking about it but i still didn't catch on!!! LOL
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YKYACPW you see the gas gauge gettling close to "E" and you start worrying about where you're going to get money for gas for the rest of the month because you spent your gas budget on co-pays and paying the difference between the insurance payment and the doc's and hospital's and lab's bills. . .
YKYACPW you start looking for a second job in order to pay the difference between the insurance payments and the doc/hospital/lab bills.
YKYACPW you know that one trip to the hospital to have blood drawn will generate 3 bills, and you know which one is missing when you are sorting your bills and only have 2 for the blood draw day.
YKYACPW your credit is trashed and you wonder if you'll live long enough to make it better again.
I read someone once that people with insurance often have more financial difficulties from treatment costs than people with no insurance. Now I know why. No insurance = get put on Medicaid and pay $1 per visit, $1 per prescription, no deductible, no pre-authorizations needed, everything covered. With insurance = $20 copay every visit, $2,000 deductible, $who knows how much difference between insurance payment and bill, plus all sorts of other surprise bills. How can I work full time and carry "good" insurance and be financially ruined when someone with no insurance can end up getting everything for just about free? (In Maine if you say you can't afford the $1 copay no one can go after you for it.)
Sorry for the rand, just really frustrated with trying so hard for 2 years to get out from under and getting hit with more bills out of the blue and finding out I'm even further behind than I was a year ago. No possiblities of vacations in my forseeable future. . .
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My deductable ( major medical) jumped to $5,000 just in time for BC
ykyacpw.... you laugh so hard & loudly (reading these posts) that your little one comes out of bed an hour after lights out & asks what's so funny & let me see & with tears of laughter on your face he turns quickly sollom & asks what's wrong mommy & gives you a hug. You can not stop laughing & poor boy got a bit confused. Gotta love em!!
Thanks everyone for sharing your stories & making me laugh SO hard!
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Hilarious!!!! Thank you!!!
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