Great saying about depression
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Hi mac - had a fabulous holiday - blue skies and turquoise seas- just what the Dr ordered!!! I fell quite rejuvenated. My hair is now long enough to blow in the wind - thrilled me no end, as last time we went I was bald as a billiard ball.
Have you had an X ray of your hands? I know they did the cervical spine, but did they do the obvious and start with the hands? Have they mentioned treatment for the Lymes disease again in case that helps? There was a report on TV here, that 40% of woman of woman stop taking their hormone therapy early as they find the side effects so awful. How much longer do you have to take them? Sending big hugs.
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Hi - sorry forgot to say I am so sorry about your friend - that must be so hard for you to see on many levels
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Here is the model made to depict the renovation we have submitted to the zoning and bylaws committee. It is really just changing the height and pitch of the roof and adding windows and doors. Now we have to wait until the meeting in Nov.
It really is hurry up and wait. maddie, I am so glad you had a good time on your vacay. Let your hair blow in the wind!!!!
Yes, I had xrays of both hands. Just regular arthritis. or how did they say it? degenerative changes suggestive of arthritis.
Oh, I have just about made it a year on HT. It was 6 months on, then 6 weeks off, then 2 months on and then 6 weeks off. And now a whole new med. It is what it is.
It is hard to see my friend suffer, and it does remind me of my sister at the end, and it brings the reality of this disease right to my face. But it also brings me joy to be able to help. She really asks for so little. Mainly just companionship. She is still planning ahead, she wants me to give her a ride to the docs in Oct. She can't drive anymore and her hubby does not drive off island. It helps me to realize how much I can do!!!
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Hey where'd the picture go? I'll try again.
so it's huge again. and you can see my messy kitchen and my cool zebra print chair.0 -
Hi Mac- well done you for getting the picture on - wouldn't know where to start! It looks gorgeous. Hope you have a lovely view from the big windows upstairs. Certain joints in the hand and thumb can be replaced if there is a joint which is particularly painful. I realised your friend's illness must be pushing the reality of the BC in your face- Big hugs for you and your friend. Did your sister die of BC?
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Mac, if your friend is only sleeping with the morphine then her dose is too high!! She will get used to it and not sleep if she gives it a chance. Quality of life, especially at the end is so important!! I feel for her...
And yes, all I notice is the great zebra chair!!!
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maddie, yes, my big sis died of BC when she was 54. (she was 6 yrs older than me) She is quite the example to follow, tho. Courageous all the way! It's been 12 yrs now. I can't even envision replacing a finger joint. I just got an appt at the rehab place in Oct. So we shall see.
barbe, We are looking for that quality of life, for sure! She is not sleeping too well at night, so I think some tweaking of her med schedule is in order. She has hospice in during the day. That is helping a lot. I just want to support her in any way I can.
My DD is coming back in Oct and we are going to a reclaimation warehouse. Where there is reclaimed building materials, wood, sinks, lights etc.... Very exciting!
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Mac - I am so sorry about your sister. Must have been so hard for you to see her suffer, I adore my sister and couldn't bear it if anything happened to her. I am sure it made your diagnosis even more traumatic than it usually is. Have fun with the reclaimation warehouse.
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I wanna see more pics of what you've done!!! Have you done anything new to the cottage???
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barbe, we are still in the planning stages. We have very strict zoning bylaws here, so we have to get through that process before actually doing any work. I do have a floor plan I can share with you. I will have to pull it up to flicker (whatever) and then I can post it. It's exciting.
maddie, thanks for the sentiment about my sister. It really did bring up the fear for me after being with her through her journey. But she also was a great role model.
The really exciting news is that the cobbler from CT is going to move here and work in my shop!!! He and his wife are moving here on January 1st. They found a year round rental and called me today. Now I have a plan!!!!!
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Hi mac - such good news about your shop. Hope they settle well .
Barbe- when do you start work?
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I am STILL being vetted for the job!! A month of background checks for heavens sake!!! Still going out to other interviews as I don't want my eggs all in one basket..... thanks for asking Maddie. Start date is October 15th if I pass everything.
Mac how great to have some company near by!!! Will it tempt you to want to help him??
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Barbe, what's this job for, selling state secrets? Lo
of course, I'll be down in the shop "helping" out. I will still own the business and be the "face" of the business, but I won't be stuck down there every day all day. My DD is coming back in a couple of weeks, she will help me clean up my organized chaos so he'll have space to work.
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I will be doing mortgages and mutual funds....with base plus commission! It's not like a $100,000 a year job for heaven sake!!! I emailed them to see when I know I'm approved and I haven't heard back!! Theoretically, I'd have to give my 2 week notice this week to start on October 15th with them....
I LOVE that you will still be the face of the business!!! You'll still be involved but it will be like "low impact" aerobics!! Maybe he'll buy the whole business one day if he sees how well he does! This way you don't lose total control. Well done, sweetie!!!!
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I was having a conversation with a Canadian friend this morning. She said how she hates that the US keeps us (people) in a state of fear over being able to afford health care or taking the risk of not having it and getting slammed with medical costs when something does happen. Is it so much better in the great north?
I don't even really know what a mutual fund is. LOL Are you going to have to be trained or can you take off running? (so to speak)
This new arrangement in my shop will be a real lesson in letting go for me. Because I will be in the shop but not doing much work, I'll have to let go of the outcome of the work. I have been know to stay late and take apart work that my employees had done during the day so it would meet my standards for my customers. I think there might be something seriously wrong with me. OCD much? But the way my hands and fingers are now, I just can't do the work anymore.
I did have a massage this afternoon and feel like mush right now.
edited for clarity.
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OOoh, I hope you enjoyed your massage!!! I had one every WEEK for 5 1/2 years until I just couldn't afford them anymore. When I stopped I had to start using a cane!!!!
Yes, our health care is amazing!! We pay through our taxes which are high. We can't deduct things like mortgage interest on our taxes like you guys can, but we get great health care. Paying extra at work gets you prescription coverage, glasses, hearing aids, etc which the government coverage doesn't pay. Once you are 65 your prescriptions are free!! We get the same tests and specialists that you guys get, but for free with no co-pay. We have to be referred to a specialist by our PCP which slows the process down, but once diagnosed with a disease (like cancer) you go to the front of the line!! I've had an MRI 15 minutes after I saw a specialist!! Physiotherapy is free only in a hospital location, not a clinic. Paying for extra at work can get you a certain amount of treatments each year. Eye tests are $60-$80, hearing tests about the same. I truly believe that if everyone got a free massage every week our healthcare expenses would drop!!!!!
Mutual funds are just a way to buy RRSPs through the stock market as a group. I will be getting a month of training and have to do the mutual fund course on my own time!! After I posted to you above, I emailed the guy and found out that they are hiring someone else for another city and want us to start at the same time, so we're looking at more to the end of October now!! This better pan out, or I'll be really upset!!!! I did go for another interview at another company, but I really want this local job.
You will have to learn to let go and let this new guy shine. He might not want you over his shoulder so check his work at night!! hehehehehehe0 -
Mac-didn't realise you will still own the business and have some involvement. How lovely for you, as I know you enjoyed it. As Barbe said- you will have to let him get on with it. Doesn't mean you can't give him some tips. Sure you would be a wonderful teacher!
Barbe- boy I hope they don't let you down now! Doesn't sound like it, if they are hoping to start you with the other lady.0 -
Thanks, Maddie, I can only hold the faith....0 -
Hi, everyone, I was off island for 2 days in a row with my friend. She can't drive anymore. Her arm is so swollen and she is on lots of painkillers. Her spirits are better and she is tolerating the chemo pretty well. Both the wound care team and the MO are pleased with the results so far. Her blood work is good and she is good to go for the next cycle. Man, what a way to change my perspective about my own situation. We had a good time, tho. Just laughing at the silly stuff that happens during a day. I did the driving. We laughed because between the 3 of us (her hubby came, too) putting our heads together we had about one good brain.
barbe, so they want to train you both at the same time?
Boy, that health care arrangement sounds good. Our health insurance is changing. So we will see what transpires.
I have a friend that is learning some sort of healing massage, she wants to come see if she can help me out tomorrow. I'll try it.0 -
Oooh, that would be wonderful to have your friend practice on you!!!!!!
Your healthcare will be better, like ours. We do have people who can afford private care and do so (which the government hates!!) but I say it lessens the load for the rest of us!!
How are you doing now that you're back home??0 -
Hey barbe, you working yet? Being trained maybe.
I saw two different docs in the last two weeks. They both think I have fibromyalgia. Actually the rheumatologist said I was a classic case. It would explain why my body has been freaking out during tx, I guess. I am not sure what to think. Part of me is thinking that it sounds crazy, and the other part wants to grab on to it because then it means I am not crazy. I have to do more research and I have an appt with my PCP this week to see what she thinks.
I had a dumpster delivered to my driveway and we are throwing out so much old dried out leather scraps and other stuff that I thought I would use some day. It feels so good to reorganize. I am going to get the washer/ dryer moved up into the house and put a bathroom into the basement, so the 2 spaces will be completely seperarte. After feeling stalled for so many months, I see some forward movement.
Hope you all are well. (and just busy or on other threads)0 -
mac, pretty sure I suggested Fibro about a year or two ago!! I have it and it is completely debilitating if you don`t get a LOT of sleep!!!!! Nap when you can and get at least 8-10 hours a night of sleep. Read lying down to ease the stress on your body as well. I took a 10 week course at the hospital about 10 years ago when knowledge was just becoming available. It was first confirmed as a syndrome in 1991 and had been hiding under the umbrella of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. It is serious in the fact that you HAVE to do only what YOU want to do!!! Any excess stimulation (fairs, concerts, weddings, etc) will cause GREAT stress on you. You will have to rest before, possibly during and definitely after if you want to join in the celebration. My family knows this, so they always make sure there is somewhere for me to lie down. I use ear plugs as well to take away noise stimulation when I lie down. You have to deaden your senses to be able to recuperate. Learn to say NO and don`t apologize for it. You are old enough to be able to say NO and not have to explain. It was much harder when I was younger!! No one knew what the hell my problem was!!!! I became a sort of pariah and it took years for my growing kids to understand. They are all in their 30`s now and can deal with it, but you have to educate the people around you as well as yourself. Good luck, sweetie! It IS doable!!0 -
yes, you probably did barbe, or should I call you dr. barbe?
I had no idea that this was so hard. I took my DD with me to a lecture that was presented at the FM clinic last week. So I think it finally dawned on her that I am not making this up and that I am not crazy. Actually, it helped me realize that, too. LOL
I am so glad that I have someone coming to work the shop for me.
My problem is that I seem to wake myself up every couple of hours. I can fall right back to sleep but I never get that deep restorative sleep that we all need. So end up taking naps during the day. Hopefully, my PCP and I can come up with some plan to ease my symptoms. She has all ready doubled my effelexor dose.
It must have been horrible to feel this way when you were young and had a growing family. I admire you barbe, for your determination!!!0 -
mac, NO one believed me until a lady with FM moved in beside my dad and step-mom. When they saw HER suffering the same way, then they believed me!! Now it is more accepted as a "disease" but 20 years ago I was just labeled as lazy. So sad really. I am here to help you in any way. Doubling your Effexor is a good start. I take 120 mgs of Cymbalta which helps. They used to just use Amitriptyline (sp?) which only made you feel loopy. Knowing the dragon you face is more than half the battle. Pacing yourself is the best thing you can do. Some are relieved by exercise, but not me, sadly. It just tires me more, but invigorates others. Go figure!!0 -
hey barbe, saw my pcp yesterday. Left there and was so tired just came home and went to bed. She has put FM on my list of dxs. We are going to hold off on more meds. She wants me to have a sleep study done. So that is first. Then she wants me to do a weight loss program combined with exercise. I told her I wouldn't start that until after my birthday. We (the 2 kids and I) are going to NYC. We are going to a broadway play and probably do lots of eating. That is next weekend.
I was really bummed yesterday. I think I was just way over tired. It is going to be hard for me to try not to push myself. I will have to surrender to my body or at least not do war with it everyday.
I was doing water aerobics this summer but found I got too tired. But I will try it again, but not schedule anything else afterwards.
thanks for sticking with me.
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Baby steps, sweetie...baby steps....0 -
Hi Mac - sorry to hear you are still going through all this pain. Pace yourself, but enjoy your weekend away. What is a PCP? Sending you big hugs
barbe - have you heard anymore about your new job?
I am well this side, and am glad to report I now have a mop of hair!!! Seems strange to have such different hair to my pre- cancer hair.0 -
Hi Mac - sorry forgot to say- I am so glad they are looking at your sleep patterns. Research has shown that if you are not getting enough sleep it has a direct effect on arthritis and joint pain.0 -
I did start my job this week. Today is day 5. I NEVER have to work 5 days in a row (in retail we always work weekends so get 2 days off somewhere in the week) so this is VERY tough. I also have a horrendous cold as does everyone else in locations I'm training in. We train for a month! 3 days in my city, then 2 in a city about 45 minutes away. It is overwhelming and being older I'm sure is not helping me to learn something new as convoluted as banking!! I had no idea this job was mortgages and insurance and all sorts of stuff!! The pay should be MUCH higher!! I get rewarded in commissions every quarter. At least I get a base with this job and it's so close to home. The horrible thing is I almost got fired yesterday!!! I left the code for the safe on the counter above it!!!! Only limited staff are even allowed in that area (NOT the public!) and there is NO cash, just paperwork, but still.....sigh. It was my third day and I guess they blamed the trainer for not being with me when I put the bag in..... I worry that my old brain is full and can't hold anymore new info! Pray for me.....0 -
Barbe- sounds really tough! I hate starting a new job.Don't beat yourself up about it. Has probably happened before. The whippersnappers may learn more quickly but they may not be so conscientious. Just keep smiling and be pleasant. You'll get the hang of it. Will pray for you. Sending big brain swelling hugs!0
Here is the model made to depict the renovation we have submitted to the zoning and bylaws committee. It is really just changing the height and pitch of the roof and adding windows and doors. Now we have to wait until the meeting in Nov.