Have any of you found love after your diagnosis and treatment?
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Hang on to the speech. You will need it at some time or you can email it to him so that you declare your position.
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I could email it I suppose, was hoping for it over the phone but I'm not going to call him and well we know how he is!
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Yes, we know how he is. He doesn't even follow up on a simple statement like "I'll call you later" when he knows you are counting on him to call. I worry about you waiting day after day. That's why you have to take control of the situation
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So sending him my speech is probably best!
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It's either that or wait and wait and wait for him to call. How will you feel if you have to wait and wait? How much can you tolerate? How much is good for you?
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Your "speech" will have no effect on him. Ask youself what you are hoping to achieve by it? You need to walk away. He is with someone else now and just throwing you the occassional breadcrumb in case it doesn't work out. Don't make the mistakes I made. Every little phone call or email from him and I had hope in my heart again. Then he would blow cold again (undoubtably, while he was seeing someone else). Then I guess they would have a fight or whatever, and he'd be calling me again. I did this s*** for 3 years. Get off the merry-go-round.
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DF, I also had no idea that he was still on Match the whole time you have been dating. This guy was never committed to you. I am starting to think he was a butthole, after all. I thought he was a nice guy, but seems now he did mislead you, and that's not right.
Hadley, I will check out your thread....
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I know... butthole is for sure!
Thinking of you Hadley, keep us posted
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Yes, I can see why you had grown frustrated with his shennanigans....
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That is for dang sure! His loss, not mine. Even if I could go back to dating him now, I've lost respect and trust and that infatuation feeling! Which is why I don't even want to be his friend. I am super picky about my circle of friends, and would never tolerate this bs from them so I should never have allowed it from this loser.
Heading out to the aquatic park today with kids and friends, supposed to be almost 90, we've had an unusually wet and dreary summer so far!
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Hadley You are most certainly in my prayer! BC is the gift unfortunately that jus t keeps on giving, for me as well. You are in my thoughts and prayers! Ive been in (remission) for 5 years but also hospitalized 5 times w (complications) the last time 3 weeks ago. One other reason why I find this dateing stuff so mind boggoling....do I really want to bring some one into this mess? But still, so tired od being alone. Well that man who was mailing me from site box sent me his email address and phone number and I was going crazy about calling or emailing him. Just could not bring myself to do it, and told him so on site message. Got a message form him this morning saying he was so sorry he missed my call and could not find my number and was looking all over for it! I never called him soooo what is w that? Hugs and prayer Hadley Kiley
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I think getting women mixed up is not a good sign for me....Ha Ha Ha Thinking maybe just looking for man friend not bad idea at this point!
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Fearless - I read your post about getting off the merry go round. I did it yesterday - my guy was dating other women and even moved out date from tonight to last night so he could go out with someone else. I told him I've been on a roller coaster and I can't do it anymore. He's newly divorced and can't committ to me right now. Says I'm the woman of his dreams. Thanks for giving me the courage to make the right choice.
Karyn
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I think that's the hard part I go over in my head too Kiley, and I'd put money on that being in the back of that boys mind too. I mean he's just soooooooo over loaded, what if he had to deal with me too? I know we shouldn't think like that blah blah blah but how can you not?
That's interesting he said sorry he missed your call? I'd ask him about that one for sure. Please consider at least emailing and talking to these guys. Can't hurt, if anything you make a friend out of it all. I know it's scary, but that 1st time will be the hardest. I have no problem talking and emailing guys, but when it comes to meeting them. That does a # on my nerves. I need some more self confidence on that level.
Karyn, you're so awesome
I'm proud of you for doing the right thing. I didn't choose to get off the merry go round, but I fell off or maybe he's pushing me off? ha ha... I read some profile yesterday on a dating site, the guy said he will not even consider dating someone if they haven't been single or divorced basically for at least a year. I think I like that idea. I did talk to one guy and he said it's been 18 months since he got divorced and he's back on his feet, but sure still sounds angry or bitter to me. I would be too if I was paying 1500 a month in child support 
Anyway, funny thing is his name is Mike, my ex husband is named Mike and the LOSER I was just dating, his name is Mike. So he's already blackballed. I think I should put that on my profile. If your name is Mike = do not apply! 0 -
May be I would rather just be penpal on site inbox to find out if there is any real common ground, Ive just been thru way to much to play dateing games.
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Pen pals may be a place to start. Some of the guys only want that, I've talked, emailed and text guys but never met them. Just nice to have someone to talk to. What sites have you gone on?
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Trust is big issue w me. I think i want to get to know someone first and if ther to impatient w that...Then maybe they have string of women and not really looking for someone special or even a friend (if you know what i mean)! And im certainly not looking for a romantic relationship w just any man who has a nice profile. I think for me it is just better stick w messageing thru site inbox to see if I can figure out who they are and not just who they portray themselves to be....IF some one is really inerested in finding someone they should be able to accept that especially in this highly technical world. One thing that has not changed is hearts can still be easily broken...Ive spent years working thru that one!
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I'm on senior people meet... Tryed other sites got tooo many youngermen in 40's and such looking for a notch on their belt. So trying to meet someone older since I am older.
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I get that Kiley, if they are in a rush to meet and not wanting to really talk much before it makes me a little nervous. I liked to think before I was a good judge of character.....apparently I need to sharpen those skills
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I just checkedmy site box got message from man that did not even come up as viewing me! How do they do that!
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Depends on the site. I know plentyoffish.com you can set it to not show when you view peoples profiles. I have mine set up that way.
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Karyn, yeah, when someone starts bumping your dates to make room for someone else, it's time to say.....next!
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Soooo right Karyn! Your the women of his dreams and he bumps you! Not Cool! Thats whaat I mean these guys can say anything! I just could not do That! NEXT!!!
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2 things you ladies have to understand in on-line dating:
1) NO guy is looking for "friends" or penpals on there .
2) ALL of them are looking at other profiles and communicating with other women.
Personally, I think 2 months is a fair amount of time before becoming exclusive, but it varies by each person and what you are comfortable with.
If a guy was still looking after 2 months, I probably would not wish to keep dating him.
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Good points Fear one! Ive got to quit brainiacking this situation!!
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Remember also, there are some nice guys out there - But you will have to sift through a lot of jerks and pervs, too...
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I don't know, but I've emailed and talked to plenty guys that I've never met in person. I have always had lots of guy friends in real life. My daughter loves Selena Gomez, she's a young actress and also sings some pretty good songs. We were listening to one and it's SOOOOO fitting, it's called My Dilemma, you have to check out the lyrics: http://www.directlyrics.com/selena-gomez-my-dilemma-lyrics.html
I also have to say, I was chatting with a guy online for the last couple days and he said something about only having 1 picture on my profile. I added a few more and haven't heard from him since. Nice huh
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I'm convinced most those guys are players... I went back to reply to man who said he lost my number, to tell him it wasnot me who called. And theres another message says sorry we could not talk much the other nite, but its been so crazy here. I never called him or any thing what up w that. Nice lyrics btw . My favorite song at the moment is an old one by Carlene Carter "Unbreakable Heart" theyve done a remake by a newer artist. I like th old 1993 version on utube. I think we just need be very wary Dragonfly. We need to protect out hearts cuz they wont, we're just a word on a page. Really, don't know what to think of these guys. I mean sorry we could not talk much the other nite! Wonder who he was talking to and why he thinks it was me!
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Man I'd call him out on it. Say maybe you should be more careful when you're being a player! I'll look that song up. I think there's probably 1 good guy out of hundreds on there?
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I'm feeling kind of smart elecky tonite...LOL these guys say no baggage no drama etc...when all the time they're playin games! My big fear is I would start dateing one and find out he's married or something. I asked my handyman over for bar b que tomorrow . At least I know who he is "good' friend!
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