Have any of you found love after your diagnosis and treatment?
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Will do... My ex just bailed on this weekend so now I'll have my girl this weekend unless I can figure out something else.
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DF, that must be difficult for your daughter. What a jerk! One day she won't even want to spend time with him.
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It's annoying for her and I, it's not his weekend though. Last weekend was and he bailed. This weekend he wants her but can't come pick her up or bring her home... Grrrr! May not need to worry if I don't hear from the dude.
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I agree, sex talk is a deal breaker. Gross.
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Good Morning Ladies
Anything interesting going on in the men department?
The guy who was talking about sex left me 2 messages on my phone yesterday to try and go out with me again. I did not call him back. Definitely don't want to see him again.
Today I am going to meet another one at a restaurant at 2 pm. This guy is 70 years old. Maybe he will not be so fiesty. Hope he doesn't take Viagra lol.
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Nothing here for me, haven heard from the guy I'm supposed to meet on Saturday in the last couple days. Seeing a trend here...
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I think they are dropping offf the edge of the earth.
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We need to start a dating site for impotent men & ladies who have no sex drive. Hmm, what could we call it: LimpDicksRUs? DateADud? NoSexPlease? Any ideas?
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I saw a dating site that is for only people who want marriage as an outcome. Forget what is was called but I'm sure you could Google it.
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Nothing new here. I am still deciding to hold off dating. I don't think it is lack of interest in men particularly, just not wanting to get to know somebody new. I will need a revision in June and will probably get a tattoo in Dec. I am still missing my ex- BF, the jerk, (why?????) and see my ex H occasionally. He is having some health/performance issues that have him concerned. I am encouraging him to take care of himself and go to the doctor, if anything for the kids. He hasn't had a physical in years. I am not feeling ready to go out there either. Don't trust, busy with life, tired a lot still.Sorry to be a downer here.................
paintedlady - I am enjoying hearing about your adventures. Am hoping you meet someone interesting but really nice!!
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Hi Ladies
Denise you had me laughing so hard after reading your post that I was coughing. You have a great sense of humor .
Mybee I really hate dating. It is work or thatis what it feels like to me.
The guy that kept calling me on the phone, left me a voice mail today. He said that he
"feels like lost my(his) best friend" when I didnt call him back. Omg, what a con artist.
Red flags are waving all over this guy. No way will I speak to him again.
Guy that I was going to meet today (the 70 year old) had his eyes checked the morning;
so he had a headache from his eyes being dilated. Meeting canceled but he wanted to meet tomorrow but I had other plans (nothing to do with men).
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Well the guy that has blown me off twice and wanted to meet up this weekend.....I haven't heard from him since Monday. He last said let's do Saturday night but we need to figure out where and a time still. I'm thinking this boy has serious issues and has no real interest in meeting me. His loss! What the hell is wrong with this guys?
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Dragonfly...maybe he justs needs an ego boost. I've had guys do that too. Don't know for sure what's up with them. Anyway, we deserve better treatment than that.
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Dragon
Sorry that this guy is behaving like a jerk. I wouldn't stress out over it. It is good that he is showing you right up front that he isn't a man of his word. Throw him back in the pond!
You don't need to accept unaceeptable behavior.
Have a great day.
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Thanks ladies, it's annoying more than anything because I wasn't looking to date. He emails out of the blue, last chance though and he blew it. When we first talked on the phone a few months ago he seemed really nice and it sounded like we had a lot in common. Apparently not
No worries, back to working on me from the minor distraction! Lol0 -
Denise you are so funny! Love your sense of humor. Ok, I am in a good mood, date tonight with Frank for a movie and dinner then I am staying over. Screw common sense.
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DF, He is probably a very nice guy and you might even like him.....but when a guy shows such blatant disregard repeatedly, I would suggest he has huge emotional issues. We all have unexpected things come up but we communicate and explain. When a guy drops out of sight like that - well it reminds me of someone I know and it turned out that (IMHO) he has Asperger's and has trouble with personal, intimate relationships. Not saying your dude is the same ... but 3 times does show a problem of some sort. And this is when he's trying to impress you.
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Yeah he's doing a smashing job of impressing me
I totally agree with you!0 -
DF, you know me .... at least you gave him a chance. I think everyone deserves a second chance. Although if a guy talks about the number of orgasms on the first date ... well maybe not that one.....but for normal stuff a second chance is ok .... this guy had his. I am convinced he has a lot of emotional issues. So move on....nothing lost....just getting info for another chapter in your book....which will of course be turned into a movie and make you a million dollars......so who would play you in a movie? ...some young Hollywood superstar.....I think Angelina and you are the same age....LOL
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HRF you're the best
Angelina is too hot to play me lol....the boy answered, asked if I could come to him to meet. Says he has his boys and can't leave them for too long alone. What do you think? I'm really put off by it.0 -
I know some others might disagree with me but.....without any emotion....just factual....he asked you out for Saturday....you agreed.....he waited a few days to work out details.....nothing wrong with that. No real reason to communicate more than that although you would have liked to hear from him before this.
So you have several choices I think. (1) tell him you have your daughter and also can't leave her for too long either and suggest that you reschedule (2) tell him you are put off by his waiting 4 days to get back to you and don't want to meet him (3) make arrangements for your daughter and go to meet him.
There is no right answer here. Each of us would probably handle it differently. It's hard not to bring your other negative experiences to bear on your decision but try. If he seems genuine (as much as you can tell at this stage) and you want to meet him, then try to make it. If you are already totally pissed off and don't want to meet him, then tell him. But before you make a decision, list the pros and cons of each plan of action and make sure you won't have any regrets. So if you don't meet him, will you regret the decision. If you do meet him, what could your regrets be? Only you can answer these questions and it is totally your decision.
And no, Angelina is not too hot.....she'd be fine. Although I think she is too skinny to be sexy. Who would you suggest?0 -
I guess it's how I operate, not everyone does. It is an issue though when you have a planner and a procrastinator (especially with his track record) You ask me out, say when and where and I'll be there. I'm a single Mom, I need to make sure I have a sitter lined up or arrangements for my girl etc... I don't like to sit around and wait until Friday to know where and when. But again, that's just how I function. I know not everyone does so I would normally cut people slack but this guy?
This is what I sent him: Hi there
My day has been CRAZY! Had to leave work early to take my girl to the doctor, and we just got home. Would you be available next weekend? I won't have my girl, so I could meet you in your town or if you could sneak away, there is a great wine and food festival up here in my town that I was thinking of going to next weekend. I like Meg Ryan, or Kate Hudson?
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You all are so great! Just found this thread and feel like I have already learned tons about dating sites just by reading posts.
I am 51 and 2 years out from BC. I also have MS. divorce with 3 teenagers, one who is special needs. I was dating a man 13 years older after my divorce but even though I really care for him a great deal and when things are good we get along great. It was all the rest of the times, like when I actually needed someone - such as BC, loss of my precious dachshund,burgulary, car accident.... times like this he just didn't know how to be there or support someone else. He is selfish and narcesssistic but when times are rough he becomes even more so. It is so stressful, hurtful and disappointing that I have called it quits. I know he doesn't believe me and will try to come back. So trying to keep myself strong and not give in.
It would be so much easier I think if I could start dating or trying to date. However I don't have a huge amout of experience in dating usually was with someone for a very long time even if they weren't the right person. I don't mind being along but since my divorce/and then BC 5 years ago I have found many of my female friends ran away and some couples don't want to get together with someone single, I think they prefer getting together with other couples which I do understand but not helpful to me.
I do not think in general I understand men at all. I have looked at sites like Match and I think don't they go back and read what they wrote or think about having someone else give an opinion on their pictures. Also always annoyed by men who are in their 50's and say they are looking for women 20-30. Really? Have they looked in the mirror? Why on earth would a 20 year old want them?
Anyway, I think for me finding a guy who was actually thoughtful and caring would totally blow me away. I recently was in a bad car accident where I was sandwitched between two pick up trucks. They both drove away without a scratch and my car was totaled - only 3 years old and a Toyota so a safe car... well my SO was supposed to be going by my house and letting my puppy out as I had two early morning meetings and he was off. So I call after I got out of my last meeting and he got a call to go out to eat with a friend so he decided not to go let my puppy out and didn't see why that was a problem (better offer and all) so then I have the car wreck - takes me hours to get home. He has turned off his phone so is unreachable(at lunch) I finally get home and he is there. Doesn't ask me a thing about the accident(left him messages) just has to tell me he finally got to my house(I had found someone else to let the puppy out)to tell me how great he was for coming over and letting the puppy out and took him for a walk but now he is hot and is going outside to cool off. Still no asking me about the accident. That is the type of man I find..... Ugh. Sorry this is so long... So not sure about dating. Most of the time I think - would someone really want to date me with my medical history and a disabled child?
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Welcome Stanzie. Sorry about all your problems. I'm sure the ladies here will have lots of advice for you. My only comment is that staying with the wrong guy in order to not be alone is a recipe for disaster. You need to learn to feel good about yourself first and not depend on a man.
DF, loved your response. It's true and it's honest. Ball is in his court. If he is smart, he will do something with it. If not, no loss. I may be old fashioned but I think communicating on the phone is so much better but I know that's not what people do these days.
Meg Ryan is way too old to play you. Kate Hudson would be fine. Have you started writing chapter 1? LOL.0 -
Welcome Stanzi,
Of course someone will want you!! Sounds like that one deserves to be kicked to the curb! This dating thing is wierd, sometimes tiring. I am meeting a match guy of coffe at 3pm, and I am forcing myself to be positive about the encounter and keep an open mind. Love to all my bc sisters!! xo
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True true HRF He did respond:
I could defenitely do next weekend. My sister should be available to watch my boys so I could sneak up there. I hope your daughter is ok and you have a good weekend.This is my response:
I'm so glad next weekend works for you Let me know what night you want to get together. If you're interested in the wine & food thing it's Fri-Sun or we could do something else too, I'm open for whatever. She is doing much better now, thank you for asking! Have a great day!Kate Hudson is awesome, she's hilarious.
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Dragon,I'm sure I've missed this but why must he sneak up to see you?
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Not sneak as you're probably thinking. Sneak as in get away from his kids for the night and come to see me. I think I originally used the word sneak when I suggested we reschedule til the next weekend. He's a single Dad to 3 boys, and I'm a single mom so time away is precious
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Stanzie - So much of what you wrote could be me. I was dating a narcissist for 4 years. It was only after I broke it off with him that I truly realized how badly he had treated me. Only wanted . the good times, was really awful during my breast cancer. I am a mother of three teens, one has Aspergers Disorder and lives with his father. I am a bit shell shocked. I think someone will want you. It is more a question of waiting for it to be a good someone. I would write more but my mouse is acting up!! Cursor keeps jumping to the left!!
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Hi Ladies
Welcome Stansie
Hope this works out for you Dragon: If not, there are more where that one came from!
I am going dancing tonight just to get out of this house.
Have a meet with an old geezer tomorrow. talked with him several times on the phone. Ho Hum!
I haveI don't expect fireworks with this one.lol. Who knows maybe I will be surprized and he will sweep me off my feet.
Now for the good part: I have spoken to his one guy on the phone This was the third time he called I thing this guy is very handsome. I cant believe I think someone is handsome!
Only thing is he lives 4 hours away from me. We are suppose to meet half way a week from this Sunday. I am getting excited, but dont want to get carried away. I dont want to jump to conclusions until I see him in the flesh. He just turned 64 today. He looks like a hunk. I talked with him for hours on the phone. He told me he usually does not talk much on the phone.
I don't expect much tonight. Probably will dance with some old geezers.
All I am looking for is my soul mate lol
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