INSOMNIACS place to talk in the wee hours
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Sas, I glanced over the Pain and Other Things postings of yours. I just don't have enough experience to offer input, but others are fortunate you gave so much of your time.
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Thanks Tulip, The saying what I think isn't the problem as many know LOL. I don't do normal well. Maybe I'll let Loverly explain it or maybe Smarrty or Susan. I think they get it. Perhaps Shep or Junie, maybe Jazzy too.
I envy normal, life looks immensely much more fun that way, but I love that there are folks that accept me being abnormal. Maybe they couldn't put a peg on it. But putting it out there makes me feel better.
CHEVY where are you???????????????????
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A friend that has come back to BCO , I invited to join us. Her name is Fran her screen name I might mess up Fredtnan. Looks close. She uses Fran though. We were last active together on Pinktober Revolution. Then she went off to Texas. Told her I was posting a note
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Sassy- we all have different levels of social skills and ability to communicate. Perhaps your therapist helped you to understand a bit more about yourself. That is not a bad thing either, as understanding ourselves is a big part of why we are here.
I am a woman who has always communicated quite a bit, made me successful in my work, but also the one who gets to do the eulogy for every family member who passes. Pros and cons to being a good communicator.
Anyways, it's all good
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What is normal...I don't even know!
A friend of mine, one I've known for over 35 years, text me yesterday and said I've treated her like my spouse. She said I treat her as if she needs to be perfect and meet all my needs. I don't think it's true, but regardless, so sad.
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I dont know what that means Wildtulip.. spouces can be grumpy and make messes, but they can also fix messes and pick you up when you fall.
I was from the east coast last I talked to Sas. Had gotten over stage 3. had some pain. My oncologists did nothing. said I was exercising too much. Found a place I could get scans. He blew us away when he told me it was in my bones. we had caught it early.
I dont want to talk about the inbetween. scans every 3 months. had my bone and CT scan today. They looked good to me. Nothing big popped out at me. worked in interventional radiology too long. wish I had paid attention more. My markers have been good . My girls are here and pretty much back to normal. Hubby gets to move here at end of year pretty much. I'm feeling pretty good. almost walked 2 miles today. me and depression know each other. I have been NED over 2 years. he puts me out of misery thursday.
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Hi Fran, nice you were able to walk today. I guess my friend is saying I've leaned on her too much, emotionally.
I have a sick child.. better get sleep while i can.
Take care, everyone.
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there is a song with a great verse. Christian worship song..the phrase....we are meant to be here......so simple yet so beautiful.
Nighty night ladies...
Lovely, hope,you stayed for the festivities and are having fun...not to,many tears
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Can I hear an Amen?
"Normal people terrify me, because they haven't had enough problems in their life to know how to handle problems when they come up. Something little happens and they snap."
"Screw normal. You know why? 'Cause if you're normal, the crowd will accept you. But if you're deranged, the crowd will make you their leader."
- Christopher Titus
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AMEN!!
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There was an author (whose name escapes me) that wrote a book about 30 years ago titled "Normal is just a setting on your dryer!" I'm going with that.
By the way, Hello Ladies!
Today was my appt. with the Ortho's PA. And she said that my surgeon is not concerned by the bone scan report saying that my hip hardware is loose, or the thing about there being a bone sliver near my acetabulum (hip socket). She told me that the sliver could be from the surgery or the dislocation. Also, they do not want to do any further surgery at this point. They're hoping that if I maintain strict hip precautions, the soft tissues, ligaments, muscles, etc., will scar over and therefore stablize the prosthesis. Also, told me that if I continue to experience dislocations, they still want to wait until I am 6 mos. out from my last surgery to consider placing an actetabular cup. So, I guess you all know that I'm gonna do everything possible to maintain those hip precautions. NO MORE Gardening, or anything else that compromises my future functionality (i.e., Cairn puppy momma).
I see knitting and sewing type stuff, along with the paperwork at my volunteering job in my future for the foreseeable future.
Welcome fredntan!
Susan - Are you feeling any better today?
Jazzy - Communication is NOT my strong suit. The thought of standing in front of people causes my brain to freeze and fear to overwhelm me. When I went back to college a few years ago I took a communications class and we were assigned group projects. Each group had to pick a charity, go and volunteer as a group, then create/present a Powerpoint presentation to the class.
When it was my groups turn, I had an asthma attack and had to leave the room right in the middle of our presentation, then I returned and barely made it through my portion without passing out. The the next semester I took another communications class, this one at a local men's prison where the class was 50% inmates and 50% non-inmates. Again, a group project. The group I was assigned to put our project together and this time I took Xanax before doing our presentation. It DID NOT help! I again barely made it through.
I am happiest when I get to work in the background providing support/preparation for the lead person. Then let them shine.
Loverly - Are you back from So Cal?
Smaarty - It was a glorious day here today. It stayed in the mid 70's. But the mercury will be heading back up for the next several days. Drats!
Chevy - I second Sassy. Where are you????????
Hey Sheppie!
Well I'll say goodnight to you all. Hope everyone gets a restful nights sleep.
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I never thought that dropping a child off to college was so emotionally draining. Yes Susan, we did stay for the festivities and said our goodbyes on Saturday night. Many tears. It was so sad to see both DDs cried uncontrollably while hugging each other tightly. It hit me the night before when DD1 told me that she was not ready to leave home yet and askedif we could take her back. I was tempted to but had to keep calm. It hit DH when we arrived home on Sunday. It feels weird that DD is not here. All of a sudden our house seems so huge and quiet. I think we all woke up with puffy eyes today.
Queenie, wishing you many years of celebration of your covenant. We need to keep up with Ms. Chevy.
Susan, Elena looks like a baby doll in that dress.
JunieB, how was your appointment today? Hoping for no surgery.
ShepK, praying you get the surgery soon. I love the beach too.
Jazzy, we live in Northern California, but DD goes to college 55 miles from San Bernadino. The sky seemed clear when we were down in LA this past weekend. Maybe the wind blew the smoke East.
WildT, is DS the one who is not well. You are blessed to have a second mum . I love your PS.
Need to go to bed. DH is reminding me to go to bed. Nite
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Hey JunieB!
Ack...Happy you won't be having to face another surgery right away....Sad that you won't know for sure until 6 months have passed. I was thinking of you today and had hoped your bone sliver and slippy hip would be fixable right away. Cool that that the sliver and hip may remedy on their own. Too bad there isn't a super-duper booster shot that could speed your healing up
Give yourself a bit more time to recover. Maybe there still is a puppy in your near future. Classes at the men's PRISON? Gah! I would have wanted a Xanax just to sit in the room! FF retired from the Sheriff's Dept - they run the jail here. He spent 25 years working there; first as an officer then as a supervisor. I can't imagine any scenario where they would have let the public mix with the inmates like that. I'm thinking that the men were non-violent offenders? No poo throwers? (ahhh, I have stories) One of the women in my dog training team had a great saying about speaking when in an uncertain/uncomfortable situation. "Fake 'n Quake" She always came off as super confident when speaking to a large group - comforting to know even she had her moments 
Wishing you a pain free and restful night of sleep 
Susan ~ Lovely, lovely pics of you and your family. And such a beautiful bouquet Claire The Beet Queen is holding! Hope you are feeling better after your treatments and that your cold has cleared up.
WildT ~ Sick kid, sore you, odd friend...... (((hugs)))
Jazzy ~ Hope the weather co-operated and you were able to properly "break-in" your new patio set!
Sassy ~ I only hang out here at BCO. I came thisclose to drowning one of my dear friends in a bucket after she kept posting some really asinine things on the other social media place. That "other" place is like a never ending year 'round version of those puke inducing Christmas newsletters some people feel so inclined to send out. Bragging, boasting,....all just a big "show" for those insecure imbeciles to make them feel oh-so-good about themselves.
Loverly ~ Posted and then saw you snuck in before me. I am soooo sad for all of you. But then again, there would not have been so many tears if you all didn't love each other so much. DD1 is starting out on what should be an exciting time of her life. May her nerves calm quickly and allow her to settle in. In the "olden days" it was hard to keep in close contact when the kids went away. Now we have so many ways to easily communicate. Not the same as being together face to face, but you can check in with each other as often as you like. Big (((hugs))) to you all. Mitzy too
Rory ~ I saw you over on the Cats thread, welcome!
Fran ~ Howdy!
Waving "hey" to all the Owlies
Finally got my call back from the surgeon's office. All is good. There had been concern about me having to wait too long, that is why the other hospital was mentioned. The vendor my cancer center uses for outside equipment had folded. A new vendor has been found and the paperwork processed. Still waiting for a date. At least I know for sure one is coming.......
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Wildtulip- wow, who says that to someone going through cancer treatment? Interesting she chose to text you with that vs. talking to you about anything in person. I would expect more from a 35 year friendship, but have had issues with my bff who has been my friend for that long too. Have you asked her for a lot of help? If yes, maybe she is telling you she is maxed out and cannot do any more right now. If she is not someone who has been around much, then my guess is friendship to her is about her needs and no one gets to have any of their own.
You have a sick child right now and need to focus on that. Next time you happen to see her, you should just ask her "I got your text and need to understand what you are saying to me?" Hear her out and see what she says. Then decide what YOU want. We all have suffered friendship losses here after cancer. I had to cut a few folks out of my life because of the way they were treating me before and after cancer treatment. Life is too difficult to waste time with people who don't care, even if we have known them a long time. I had to cut off a friend of 25 years because of the way she treated me during treatment, and then came back later acting like we had lost touch. She even said as much. We have been done for a few years now and find I don't miss her. Not all friendship last forever.
Loverly- I hope your DD has a great year at college.
Gotta run but here is a rainbow after a big storm yesterday that extended from one end of the valley to the other. Big rains yesterday!
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Okay, abnormal or the normal about the abnormality, is acceptable as the normal, and there will be no more profundity or conundrum related to the question:)
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Junie, status quo seems to be okay. Good. If you ever have to do a presentation again ask for Inderal 25mg. Usual starting BP dose is 50 mg. Inderal has been use for presentation anxiety/ tremors for a few decades. But I would suggest trying it before the presentation to see how it affects you.
Oh Loverly, sorry it was so hard to leave DD1 at school. HUGS Skype?
HI Fran, don't worry about catching up Glad you came.
Off to dinner and Star Trek Beyond.
Swam a 1000feet YAY That's = to ten houses on my block.
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Sassy ~
Sage wisdom, logical, deep
Inmates, asylum
Owlettes reign inclusively
"So say we all"
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Being kind to Loverly - this pic may or may not include pants 😌
Edited to add a P.S.....
Sas ~ Please report back immediately upon viewing the new Star Trek. I am a hard core purist. So many things I have issue with regrading this new incarnation. The little fake Chekov boy was always adorable though.... Rest in Peace dear Anton Yelchin ......... I blame Chrysler and their abomination of the sacred "Jeep". (hard core Jeep purist too)
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Hahaha....perfect timing!!
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I had to reciprocate.
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Rory, welcome! I get stressed out in crowded place ever since I could remember. I do enjoy quiet time, but I also enjoy spending time one on one with a friend. I do have mild self-diagnosed ADD. Always struggled in school. Didn't realized I learned differently from the normal people until I became a mom.
Welcome, Fran! Did I read that right? Your family and DH live apart because of his work. I need to go back and reread.
WildT, wanted to comment last night about your friend of 35 years, but wasdead tired. It is insensitive what she said knowing that you are no longer with your spouse. Friends supposed to build you up not tear you down when you most needed them. I'm sorry. I hope this is not the same friend who came over to spend the night two weeks ago. I'm so glad for big Sis Jazzy.
JunieB, hopefully your body does its job with the healing so you can avoid surgery.
Thank you Ms. S for checking on me.
Ms. Sas, I can't believe you spent that much time researching. It must be the O of OCD in addition to the caring and nurturing blood in you.Bless you.
Oh....thekids are dismissed from school. My turn to be the carpool mom today.
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Oh my goodness! Loverly.......momentarily paniced that you had somehow snuck in and snapped a pic of FF! Came to my senses when I remembered FF would never get that close to the stovetop. And those counters are clean. Underpants clean too.............
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Oh, my...before I re-read and write I have to tell you girls, you made me giggle for the first time in days!! Those man pics/words and your comments Shep...too funny!
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Lover, how far up, but n northern cal. We go to eureka once a year. My fav uncle lives there. Don't think you can get any further north:)
Still not feeling great. It's amazing the amount of energy it takes to stand these days. And the. There's the puppy. While exhausting her I think I am killing myself. Can't wait for this chest cold to be gone:(
Lover, I know they usually plan a freshman thing soon for the kids. I remember it was no big deal when we dropped Claire off. That 7 week visit...oh my, she buzzed me in, ran to the landing to meet me and hugged me,and wouldn't let go. My shirt was sopping wet with her tears. So much for thinking everything was ok. It seems they settle in after Christmas. Put your seatbelt on, and get those tissues ready.
Jazz, wish I could help you stay still. Hard to do. Be good:)
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Hi, Susan! Eureka is about 300+ miles from where we live. I have not visited Eureka. Must be pretty. Bummer about the chest cold. Make sure it doesn't progress to pneumonia. I thought about you the other day...the time when everyone was waiting to see where Andrew would be placed for his residency. Now I completely understand your pain/anxiety. At the beginning of our trip, it was droplets of rain and by the end it was Niagra Fall. I get to do it again with DD2, Lords willing.
So expect she willsettle around Christmas time? Thanks. 0 -
Wildtulip- Loverly makes a good point, talking about her being like a husband with you when you don't have one. Good question too about whether this is the same friend who is well known to cancel on you a lot. One in the same?
Susan- ha ha, slow down? Me? How is that baby?
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Shep - the inmates that participated in the communication class I had taken were men convicted of everything from murder, theft, to drugs manufacturing/sales, etc. But no poo throwers to my knowledge. ;0) They were allowed to take these classes because they'd demonstrated excellent behavior while incarcerated and had been accepted into the college degree program for AA's in I think 2 or 3 different areas.
The program served the purpose of training inmates skills that they could use to find employment after release from prison. At the time I was there, approx. 30 former inmates that had graduated with these degrees had successfully reintegrated into society. A few had even started their own successful businesses. At that point not one had re-offended either. The thought was that if you release an inmate without improving their coping skills and preparing them with education, they would simply go back to what they were doing before prison in order to make a living.
At the time there was one anonymous private benefactor, but I heard about a year later that that person had withdrawn their financial funding and the program was looking for alternate funding sources.
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Loverly - Glad you got your DD off to college and had an enjoyable time, even if there were some tears too.
Susan - So sorry you're still feeling puny. I sure hope you get some relief soon.
Wenchie - How's it going girlie? Miss seeing your posts and your humor.
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