INSOMNIACS place to talk in the wee hours
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Oh no I've lost my ability to print---it shows up originally then when I hit submit whammo it's gone, when I hit preview whammo it's gone Oh mese oh mice I' m a fraudulent failure for fun photos==phooey.
Ahh my job is calling me--ring, ring, WTF do u want, interrupting me---no I didn't say that
TTYL
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Little Cammi.... don't fret none.... just let us do it for you... You will get it back again... Sometimes that happens to all of us.... Well, maybe it doesn't, but we don't care...
So is this you?
Actually I did this in 1955-1958!
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BS confirmed that is just the drain I was feeling, but she also assured me that I wasn't a weirdo for need reassurance because of all I've been thru. She said I may be able to start chemo late next week, but it is just all going to depend on how the infection is looking and how the other doctor's feel/think its going. This is hard having 4-5 different doctors at the same time!So, dh just took the 4 year old out to church for the evening. I have the house to myself for a couple of hours!!! weeeeeee!!
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T&C, of course you're not a weirdo, BC only makes us think that. So happy it was an easy explanation. Enjoy your time alone
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yippee !!! I'm going in Monday for my exchange. He had a cancellation. So excited to get these expanders out.
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Rah Rah Smaarty. Monday will be here soon.
Tangerine - sounds like your BS is just what you described her as. Not a stupid question, you've never had it b4 or at least it didn't feel like that. Glad she was able to reassure you. Hope you enjoyed your quiet time. I think the wind has finally died down. We may get sleet/freezing rain on Sunday. Oh joy. Just need some rain please. I'll take it in the freezing variety in small amounts.
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Well, I can't sleep tonight. I'm tired, but my brain just loves to go and go and go! I'm waiting on my xanax to kick in, so hopefully soon.Luvmygoats-I think you are further north than me, you probably have a better chance at the sleet/freezing rain stuff. The lakes around here are crazy dry though.
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Smaarty, happy dance for you!
Tang, hoping the Xanax kicks in quickly and does its job.
The last couple nights, I just pass out watching TV, even before I get to take my melatonin and getting a decent night's sleep. Don't know why it's different, don't want to jinx anything.
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it was a good thing I made my bran muffins this morning for the freezer. Also got 1 bridesmaid dress basically all done. Was going to start another next week, but not happening now. I'm heading off tomorrow for a short sewing retreat, so got to get a few things done now before Monday. I'm so excited, I might be on here tonight!
The place were going to I think doesn't have wifi, so you probably won't hear from me. Everybody be careful out there in all this crazy weather. I have a new SIL that has to go to Minnesota next week in -20 degree weather. I don't think he has the kind of clothes for that weather. Brrrrr
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Some good news here---See Tang sometimes things are scary but always talk to u'r Doc and things don't seem to bad. so I'm glad. Tang try tot to think to much, it helps a lot.
Smaarty Monday is the exchange"" That's good right so it will be done. Isn't this exciting. U've already completed a dress u'r fast Smaarty, u'll have this done in no time I'm sure.
Oh Chevy I wish it was that easy answering a phone I do remember tho on a smaller scale, and well yea I used to plug in the wrong people or disconnect people, but I could hear and understand them so it was all me that did it. Oh it's still me, but I don't even know what people are saying to me anymore. It's kind of funny, cuz I am so capable of doing this job (normally) but now if my brain freezes for 3 seconds I've lost all train of thought and I can't admit I'm all off in what is going on, only cuz my life work was so much more complicated and I had no problems and I worked for 4 months with chemo weekly and well I'd get sick and take off, but I could handle my job. then when I restarted my chemo a couple of months later with different stuff I noticed the change and I couldn't work anymore or think and now I see I still can't-when I didn't do anything I didn't notice it as much plus it could be funny, now I feel responsible to someone Responsibily + me is a double edged sword.
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CAMMIIIIIiiiiiiiiiiii! Are you still there? Wave your hand out the window so I can see you!
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Morning goils! Teka, I STILL don't know what some of those abbreviations are! Those are there for us to ponder.... maybe?
Cammi, did you see what Littlegoats said? She called her TANGERINE!!!!!!!!!! Ha, ha! Good one!
Wasn't there some code word about Charlie Tango or something like that? Somewhere?
Okay, see? I was almost nearly right! She looks like a tramp to me.
Tangerine, you can't be a weirdo! That's what Cammi and I are...! I have to tell you, if it would have been me, wondering what that was in there, I would have called the Police! Glad they figured it out...!
And you had some "me" time! Good job! I get about 2 hours every day... and I love it.. even if I don't do a thing.... which is hardly never ever.
Morning Teka and Smaarty.... You are getting a..... let's call it a "revision"... So expanders must be where they have like a balloon???in there, and they fill it??? to a certain degree??? to probably stretch your skin???? And then they can "exchange" all this after the skin has made room for more permanent ones? I'm happy FOR you...even!
Going to go have fun sewing, right? And it snowed here last night, probably about 6 inches... But we are staying in!
Isn't that awful about the icy roads in Atlanta? Man, that Governor is taking a regular "beat-down!" Aren't those guys in charge supposed to have their heads out of their BUM, and LISTEN to the forecasters, and take preparations accordingly? It's called something like Monosodium Glutamate... or maybe I'm ... wait, I'll look it up.
http://www.coloradodot.info/travel/winter-driving/faqs.html
Well, maybe in his lame defense, he has never seen snow and ice before.
2ndTime! Wait! Could we just call you 2222222? Glad you are able to sleep better! It's like when something GOOD happens, I'm afraid to talk about it, thinking that it will go away.....
Cammi, you don't need to know anything more than what you do...
WHAT? Do you want to sound smarter than the rest of us? We know everything you say, almost, and wouldn't care if we didn't.
You've lost your train?
Did you gals hear that? Cammi lost her train.... No WONDER! No, it's because you go back and forth through doors, and then you lose your "train" of thought..... THERE! Whew! I got you out of THAT one!
You are responsible only to you and us! Well even Joey and Katie-Kat. That's all you need. And we can help you with that....
It's like I'm talking to myself here! You guys still asleep?
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lmg-and Nj--well yes on holding the shoulder ,but each is holding it a bit different. The schematic is show there are oodles of places in the shoulder that can be cause of pain. Maybe using the one finger approach when showing it to the doc. Point with one finger to that pain area
Problem to the PCP this is going to mean something different than to a orthopedic doc------other specialities involved with us--MO, RO, CARDIO's---none are going to have a clue.
Oh well thought a pic might help maybe not
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Maddy, Thyroid issue picked up as a goiter-enlargement last may in yearlies exam. 3 ultrasounds and a bx. I just can't figure out why this test thyroglobulin wasn't done before. I know Cea's arean't used for screening, only after cancer dx'd by pathology. But until I'm given a rationale why it wasn't done. I'll question it..
Both docs reacted to it immediately, changed oars. Well WTF then why didn't the order it earlier. I asked b/cI wanted Hashimoto's ruled out. if both would have been abnormal----hashi's. I had no clue about the neg anti's and positive tH being an indicator of cancer. Till I read. Poop.
Maddy read about the trapezeius(sic) muscle. it's the stinker for what you describe.
Cami I'm okay , no knives. Seriously, I want to retire from all this intense learning. I want to learn how to play. Got a book on it? LOL
Chevy-----sorry had a thought lost it---now I can add low cortisol to chemo/anestesia/drug brain. for memory loss
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Good morning ladies (or goils)! Just waking up. So happy it's Friday (need dancing smiley here)
Chevy, you are in good form already this AM, loving the 50 shapes of grey cartoon! Shouldn't have said anything, difficult time falling asleep last night. Oh well. Not sure I'd catch "2" meant for me, is "2nd" too much?
The much-talked rain we were supposed to have: disappointing, just a couple sprinkles. Much ado about nothing.
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No, okay.... never mind the 2222222! 2nd is you gal! No, maybe we shouldn't have talked about your sleeping.... It HEARD you!
I slept better last night..... Just keep thinking about Lacee, and wondering if I "missed" something... like if I should have noticed she wasn't herself! But she would always snap out of it.... So It's too late now.... at least she isn't having any more problems.... She's just asleep......
We got 7 inches of snow, and it is a HEAVY one..... another storm coming in.... I'm fooling around in my closet.... just organizing.
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Chevy, please stop thinking you missed something. While we love our furbabies as our children, they can't tell us when something is wrong and we can't read their minds. A lot of things appear as againg, who's to know if it's normal aging or something more. The best thing I can do is tell myself I did the best I can at the time. I can't add the burden of thinking I missed something to my sorrow as nothing productive will come of it.
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Chevy- love that photo! My fantasy man comes with a hammer and mop!
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Cami, Just write stuff down while they're talking. That will get you back on track after a brain fart.
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Good Morning all...home from rads..
Chevy, is DH a football guy? Is this a big deal for him?
Smaarty, I am so envious of your sewing runaways.....the swap on Monday also, well not envious for that, but it gets you closer to the finish line, and that is what we want, to be done with all the bc bulls~^t.
Cami, our little one, I picture you being 5'1", why is that? Short and mighty...
Tangandchris, do you have one child? 4 yr. old, how fun...hope you have an easier day, get that pesky infection cleared up and on to chemo. Cami said it, try not to think!
Sas, you had to buy a BOOK to teach you how to play? Yes, an intervention is needed here. I have spent the most of my adult life playing...taught my kids how to "play", maybe did to good of job on that. They both are compulsive about there sports.
Teka
Wavy hello to 2ndtime/Maddy, SweetPea, Enerva, Luvmygoats, Wren, Jazzy & all here
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Aw, thanks, Hi1!
Wish you all lived closer, we have a natural hot springs spa really close, then we all could play. Sassy, don't you remember how to play and have fun? We gotta change that.
** warning! whine and cheese (say the cheese for grilling) follows:
Thanks for making this a place to "just be." Don't have to put on airs or pretend I'm something I'm not. Ok, just gotta release this: there are times I just want to shout (at some people, not all of you, of course): No, I'm not ok and yes, I still hurt (way longer than I want! This isn't a ploy for attention), I've had cancer (not once, but twice, the first time I convinced myself I was cured, but sadly that isn't true). The smile I sometimes have is just a game because you tell me I should be happy. Yes, it's about my attitude, but what about yours that you just can't accept who I am? Some people.... (End of rant, thanks)
TTFN (ta-ta for now)
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2ndtime, natural hot springs are so relaxing, I love hot water! We have a hot tub, on our patio, I have not been in it since last spring, could not during chemo or now during rads, but once I have healed, I am turning on Eric Clapton and having a adult beverage and let the relaxing begin
We could take Sasafras for a sunset walk on the beach, build a little fire ( is there places in S. Calif that still let you do that? )
I have lots of fun planned for next summer, hopefully my body & mind will cooperate...
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Hello, fellowlettes!
(Sorry if that sounds too weird, but it seemed more practical than fellow owlettes...)
Anyways, the herceptin made me very drowsy, I sleep very much, so less present around here, which is not a good idea because there is so much encouragement and understanding here.
I feel quite low today, not because I had the second herceptin treatment. But because my "lovely" onc wants me to have hormone therapy, even though until now she was averse to it since the tumor showed responsive toless than 1% of both ER and PR. And she said it must be 0% in order to be negative.
I really feel reluctant to the hormone therapy because of my age and even more because of the side effects of the tamoxifen. She wanted me to have zoladex as well, but a fellow onc she consulted told her that tamoxifen would do given my stats.
I want to refuse the tamoxifen, but I'm worried the onc might get furious and what if she stops the herceptin? Can she do that? Do I risk a change of oncs?
Sorry for this drop of desperation, maybe I'm having the wrong attitude in feeling little enthusiasm about hormone therapy. Maybe the fellowlettes can lead me on the right path if I stray?
Thank you.
May the force be with us!
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We celebrated our wedding anniversary (observed) by going to a hotel that had what they called a soaking pool heated to 102F. It was 3 feet deep, huge, and had islands in the middle. The weather was in the high 30's and the pool created steam that made it seem otherworldly. We stayed one night and managed to soak twice. It was saltwater with very very little chlorine. We both really loved it. DS has a hot tub that we enjoy when we visit, but I don't think we would use it enough here to pay for heating and the work of cleaning.
Where is the hot springs? SIL lives in So Cal (Claremont), so if it's close to her it might be worth a visit.
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Sas, Cami Chevy pls never leave us, i need you lol I am slow to keep up but this is one of my favorite forums lol
I am down cuz one of my sister may have bc. We dont have the biopsy results yet. We were to get them today and some as s ho le doctor went home and didnt sign the report so the lab refuses to give my family any info. ;( i am very upset cuz i dont want any body to get bc. Also i was the only one in my family and now there could be 2 of us. ;(
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Stellina, there is no way she could or would stop your herceptin. I know so little about this, but with your dx, and the fact you had chemo, your potential benefit is not as large as a more involved dx, (positive nodes ) as mine. I do not know if I am explaining that properly but I'm sure you get it.
Lots of ladies on this board are very well informed, they will have some good advice for you. You can think about it all, if you do decide to give it a try, you always have the option to quit. That is common.
My SIL tried for a few months, then stopped, I was shocked as she had 16 nodes (?) with cancer, cannot remember the exact #, but alot. I start Arimidex in 2 weeks, keeping my fingers crossed for few SE..
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GolfGirl! You mean the Super Bowl? I guess we really like the Bronco's, because they ARE in the Super Bowl... but we don't really sit and watch the games!
I don't even sit and watch Nascar, even though I listen, and have the TV on.... and then I run in the room when I hear something going on...Ha!
And Sass needs an intervention? Or is it you? What "game" is she playing? What am I missing here?..... do I have to go back even further?
2ndTime.... You know, actually I don't know how you guys do it.... Especially you, that have already gone through this once.... Then to face it again! And to get tubes, and implants, and go through chemo? I don't know how you gals can even get out of BED, much less try and be strong!
You don't have to be happy..... not all the time.... maybe just once in awhile.... Nothing wrong with your attitude.... YOU have been through more than most women that I know!
Sometimes ..... like today, my attitude just sucks! I get so mad at DH, for just acting stupid! I mean I don't MEAN to, but today I just can't help it! So today is not a good day for me. And it's just stupid things! Maybe when he gets back, I will be more patient.... My nerves are just shot... and I don't want to listen to any chit.... So how's THAT for an attitude!
Okay.... if you can shake it, let me know how you did it...
I'm going to go fix a chocolate coke....
Stellina! You can be in a bad mood too! I would not like to start anything new either! My Oncologist wanted me to take Tamoxifen also..... So did I! But after 14 months, it didn't work out.... So I quit it myself. You can TRY it, or anything else.... Most women are normal, and have no problems... but I'm not like the rest. Some women take 1/2 the pill... or maybe every other day.... Ask your Doc.... See if she slaps you along side your head. I felt that taking Tamoxifen would HELP me not get breast cancer again.... but we just don't KNOW that for sure.... NO-one does....
We just watch, cross our fingers, and HOPE that it never comes back, or starts somewhere new.
Cammi and I might lead you astray all on our own!
Wren, how fun! You should have taken Stellina with you...! And 2ndTime!
Now Enerva! Why would we ever leave? Isn't that Owl upside down? Or is it just me? Ah man, don't worry about anything yet! That A--hole! See? They just don't care! And tomorrow is Saturday? That jerk! Call again tomorrow! That would make me mad.... in fact it did. I'm just generally cranky today.... And I hate this snow... Okay, what else?
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Blessings, you are in my thoughts.
Hi1, there are still beaches with fire rings, but that may change by summer. Beaches are trying to eliminate them.
Wren, she probably knows - it's Glen Ivy (less than an hour away I would think). Week days are best, less crowded. DD went last week - turns out it's free admission on your birthday. Wish I would have known that a couple weeks earlier. The main draw is Club Mud, fabulous on a hot day (but bring an owl swim suit)
Enerva,thanks for the wonderful photo.
I need to put down the iPad and get to some errands....
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