Single life after a mastectomy
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June- oh so lovely, thanks for sharing! I was in DC for a conference many years ago and got to see the cherry blossoms. Just nothing like it anywhere like there!
Glad you got to get out of dodge and enjoy yourself!
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BB- I forgot about the rowing group. A woman's BC group will be a good thing for you. Finding like minded folks to share things with is a great way to meet new friends and have people do things with. Wishing you luck tonight with the meditation group too!
I have a handful of girlfriends here I do things around music, gardening, outdoor activities, travel, etc. Several of these friends went through the BC with me, so they know I am not able to do everything I used to do. Some other friends want to go, go go and don't understand that is not my new normal (can't and don't want to). I think being in a group of women who have gone through bc will keep you from having to explain yourself, especially on the energy front.
I am going to the gym in a bit to do my weights and swimming. I have some meetings tomorrow and hope for this to be the week my new work comes in. Very close on two viable options. Fingers crossed.
Wishing everyone a good week!
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ok ok I have been gone for a week I think and so much went om here.
Jazz I am sorry about your friend
no words can make us feel any better when we lose someone we care for.Bb, I must say I admire your courage to have sex again lol I became so dry when this dame flashes came and only now that my period came back last month I am feeling a bit normal again.
Ok so so much happening.
Firs I had a phone conversation with HR. They were unless but directed me to another health service department within my company. I then contacted them and asked for their help. They then asked me to contact my doctor and request a second letter with specific details.like my diagnosis, prognosis medication etc the why I should no work on call after hours during the night etc etc.
I did send a fax to my doctor explained what I needed. Then she call me back and said no to worry she could provide me with the letter but the coming week. Today is Monday and I still did not get it so maybe tmw or wed. My doctor has been very supportive so I don't want to bother her too much. I will wait for her to contact me and then go pick up the letter I guess. Then I ll forward to that dept the lady there said I do have a legit case and that she will try to get me out of those night extra hours or try to get me to transfer.my only concern is that the a s s h o l e of my manager comes back tmw and he will be looking forward to bullying me around since by tmw he will be contacted by that lady. Anyway we will see what happens.
I had an open house on the Saturday and it went well I met a few people who I am praying they contact me to see properties.
Then Sunday it was the first nice day of spring here finally reached 19 and sunny so I was able to install my motorcycle battery and I took her for a spin not to far but it made my day.
There is more when I went to my underground and I installed the battery my bike did not start and I got so frustrated then as I sat in my car watching youtu.be video to figure out what to do about the bike my ex sent me a text telling me he spent the night in the city and that he was close by so I told him what happened with the bike. Then he offered to come and help me and off course I said yes lol well
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this is what he did: Chain was too loose and the axle was not incline. Had to square it up. Nut fell off the clutch cable adjuster. Been off a while. Clutch lever was not releasing the clutch far enough causing motor to stall when you put it in gear. Set that up and installed the lock nut so it will stay in place. Had to charge battery. Bought a volt meter and booster cables for car because I am crazy he said and should have had them in my long ago lol
Anyway after he fix all that the bike started no kidding lol we then went to eat at a restaurant we use to in the past and we went for a ride together around my area. Then then I rode my bike along the hiway he took to go home to a point we're I turn back and we part.
I have to say it was so nice to spend the day with him. He did invite himself up for sex and that was great cause he actually showed me he care about doing stuff for me he never did in the past. Anyway I looked at him and I was chocked lol dame bb he looked good lol
Ok ok no sex I was always keeping my distance but off course it was not easy lol
So tonight here I am trying to study my book very tired since had a crazy few days but I am surviving.
No no I am not back with my ex it was just a friendly visit. He did asked me again if I was seen anyone and made silly remarks but no he never said he wants me back for real so that is that.
I haven't hear from milky.ll text her tmw to check on her.
Keister chemo is tomorrow
hoping this is the last one Will let you know.
Thanks June and all for asking about me I honestly hope this issue with works gets resolved
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Enerva- it is a good day when you can see your ex, have him help you and not go back to the way things were. I am glad you got the bike fixed and can ride it again. Whoot whoot!
I am glad the people at work are helping you with getting the doctors letter to help you have better hours at work. The a-hole manager can't do anything about forcing you to work those long hours if you are unable to for health reasons and with the letter. Give a call this week to see when you might expect it.
The company will be careful with you as they can sued for stuff like this, and your HR people know that only too well. You just keep in your integrity and hopefully HR can get the hours thing worked out soon. At least that way, you won't have to be there all time and can look for something else if you have to. And if he makes your life miserable, just don't stay. It is not worth working in these bad situations.
I hope you get some good news about the open house this weekend. Fingers crossed!
Thank you for the kind words about my friends passing. I am doing better about it, just will be with me for awhile. I talked to a few folks from that era including an old friend I lost touch with a few years back just this morning. Connecting with friends and colleagues who knew and cared about her too helped.
Good night everyone!
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E - call your doc every other day....mention you had some issues or the boss did something. You need the letter so don't wait....they are busy so you need to remind them. Usually the secretary picks up the phone so she can remind the doc
Jazzy - sorry about your friend
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thanks ladies I ll call my Dr. Office this morning for sure.
I honestly hope this issue goes away, I can't afford to lose my position now. I will also see about getting another job soon. I haven't send any internal application since it could look as if I am creating a big deal before things get resolved but as soon as possible I will leave.
I am just waiting for my train now.
Hope you all have a great day and week
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Enerva- the other thing you can do is offer to put something together in draft for your doctor, so all she has to do is add the medical part. Maybe a bit about your job and it's regular requirements, plus the extra you are being asked to do. Then all she has to do is add in is the medical part. Ask the secretary if that would help them to get it to you faster?
One thing I did not like that HR lady said to add in was about your prognosis. That seems like they are asking for a bit too much information there. I would see if she can just speak to the immediate issue here "E had cancer, has completed treatment, she will have 5 years of follow up care and we recommend our patients to not work excessive hours to protect their health for the longer term."
I do understand you need this job and need to keep it going for income. Know that my recommendation to you to not stay is to leave WHEN you find something better.
I am sorry that you have such a bully boss. I have had a couple in my life and every time, those guys did themselves in with their behaviors. People would report them to HR, good employees would leave, etc. Maybe this guy delivers results for your company, which is why he has this job to begin with. But bad bosses usually do themselves in. Not yours to worry about, you find the best way to take care of you.
June- thank you for the kind words!
I just got a referral for some new work from someone I worked with here for another client site. Sounds like one of their affiliates lost some folks on a critical initiative so will explore where that is at and see if it may be an option.
Wishing everyone a good day!
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BB- the thing I am really interested in is moving along per my call today to my contact. They are trying to sort out a rate with the client for this level of work, and then will continue the conversation. They hope to have nailed down this week. Got contacted about another opp from a colleague today too that I am waiting to hear more about. One local one dead in the water, but am okay about it (was not that excited to begin with). I think the first one is going to happen, it feels very positive to me and decided I really want it!
BB, all those questions are illegal now, thank god. I began my career in the oil industry back in the 1980's, and I had so many men ask me those questions during job interviews. I remember thinking "what does this have to do with anything?" When asked, I was just vague like "I don't know, I am finishing grad school and looking forward to my career with a great oil company!" They used to coach the married women in my grad school program to not wear their wedding bands to interviews to avoid discrimination. Well, oil companies are not the place for women and they still are not.
With respect to cancer, I still think the overall perception most people have is "you are going to die" and so they go on a witch hunt to get information to support that assumption. Well, we are all going to die some day of something! I am sure the doctors will be careful to not disclose too much. They know how employers are.
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Just for fun!
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jazzy - lol so funny
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Several of my friends said the guy holding the cat had the best chance of a wife as he is pet friendly! I loved that!
Going to a business dinner and then to the gym. Well, the gym if I am not too full from dinner that is. I want to swim tonight.
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i should travel back then and there....haha..
btw, did any of you know disability is a taxable income?? i got hit...0 -
June- oh no. Was it disability insurance income or something else? Do you have to pay a lot? Darned taxes (I pay a lot as as a self employed person....)
BB- I plan to stay single. It has worked for me up until now.
Had a great biz dinner and another collaborative set up in the works. They introduced me to this fabulous restaurant on my side of town that is wonderful italian food. These folks are out of NYC. I will be going here a lot more, that is for sure!
I ended up having just a tad of wine which nixed out going to the gym tonight. Oh well, there is tomorrow.
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yes it is. Quite a lot to me. 1200+.....
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June- ugh, sorry you had to pay. Unexpected for sure.
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Lily, you go, girl. With you all the way. I think of it as making love to myself.
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BB- yes, Piper has been gone for awhile. I think I heard from her last on PM in January and nothing posted for months. I knew she was going to the New Orleans jazz fest earlier this month and hope she had fun. I have not seen her on any other threads either.
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I have given myself a goal to get through a box a day in the garage every day this week to consolidate/purge and finish what I need to here from the reno and de-cluttering. Four so far as of today, and have two containers freed up and tossed a box. Lots of purging going on along with all the rest of my activities.
At the end of my day, a little stop for some pampering and new turquoise toes!
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BB- no don't give up hope. I never realized people lost finger and toenails from chemo, until someone else on another thread mentioned it. How awful. You are still healing, they will come back!
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nice pedi!!
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BB - lol...work is keeping me busy....i try to read every post but only post here and there....
oh i am getting more and more into using my blender. i have a smoothie in the morning. and another at work in the AM. and at night, i have a veggie smoothie. trying to up my veggie intake. i've been eating more sugar (dried mango) this week...sigh. i crave for junk food this couple of weeks. did i tell you i just love shake shack?!...
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June- I try to smoothie and use my juicer but sometimes less disciplined. Never been to Shake Shack but heard it is divine.
Hope work is better, that micro-manager off your back?
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not really. It really depends on what we are working on....and I hope the biz works out. Meaning you will be coming to NYC? Sounds fun
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June- I might be getting to NYC at some point if I am doing work in PA. Will let you know.
I have a few friends to catch up with in the city, you being one of them!
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oh great....
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Went to see a great jazz performance in town with Branford Marsalis and his quarter. It was SOOO good. June, I could have been at the Blue Note down in the village the way that music made me feel tonight......
I hope everyone is ready for Friday.
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hi I just got home I am so tired this week stressed the crap out of me.
Ok so when I left a msg to my doc on wed to remind her about the letter she left a msg for me saying she had fax the letter directly to the woman at hr on April 13 th. So that explains how mad was the manager on Tuesday he again was very much fighting with me in front of the other people. He basically told me that when I came back my job was not longer there which is bs. Then he said that is why I belong to the new team since that is the only job he has. I kept calm I then said if that is the case I would like to receive my new job description since this is news to me. He wanted to kill me lol if there was fire in his eyes I could have burn. Anyway he then when om saying he is chocked to see how we are reacting that if what we want is for him to do things in writing from now on that he will. And when on and on it was brutal.
Then yesterday I email the woman from that dept asking her if she received my Dr. Letter and she said yes but my manager has been avoiding her msg figures. So I now have no idea what is going on I get sick to my stomach every time he comes by.
Next week I have an appointment with the new director and I can only imagine what they have told him. I just hope he is able to see my work and judge by that and not by what he will hear this week.
I am tired and so down. This hole thing is so not nice. I am working my a s s not even taking a lunch and jumping when I am told to jump to now be bully by a man who no offense has no people skills at all.
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E - the HR cannot play coy. You have to write down all he's been doing to you. And you tell HR if he still goes after you then you need an employment lawyer or go to the government.
Another way is go on STD and look for another job. Money wise is not good but healh wise it's great. Ask your doctor of all your symptoms and you need to take STD
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I am so sorry E. It just upset me when I see another human being acting so cruel to another human being. Karma will catch up with him
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