Single life after a mastectomy
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june you are so sweet.I honestly I have no idea why he is after me. I promise you I get there on time I live late I work on the weekends when he asked me to and he is been so mean.it all makes me think the sneaks are on his back making him be so mean. I am not sure I don't even sit in the same building. They are acting very strange specialy for him to say he will now create a new job description for me. REALLY!! I came back October 06 2014 and now u ll write a new job description to include on call cell phones and guess what is not only one it is two cell phones one which supports wss prd issues and one to support efx issues. I just can't believe it.if I show you the projects I am working on now. The name of the owner who do you think it is? Me I am working on regulatory reports which I was the one who created wrote the requirement for it in 2011. My name is all over this documedocuments. And he come and says I am not doing my old job? What a joke. I am doing my old job plus.
Anyway yes I will see what happens then I may figure a way to get out even if it is short term.
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ok so I sent you pm. You guys can see how I have try to reach out its crazy before that email I sent to two other dept within hr. And had not luck I hope this lady now that she has my Dr. Letters can help me out.
This is been the hardest few weeks ever.
My peers also have so many concerns but Noone ll help.
Unreal.
Anyway thank you for letting me vent to you ladies.
I am not sharing with my family cuz they have enough with what my sister is dealing with back home.
I also don't mind sharing with you guys all the info so you can review and give me your opinion but u have already helped me by all your comments.
At least I see I am not the crazy one here
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Enerva- feel free to share with us here and I responded to your PMs. I am sorry you have had to deal with this. I had to deal with so much crap on that big project I did when I went back to work after surgery. Here we are, struggling to survive, and people are trying to kill us with long hours and all kinds of abusive treatment. You have us here to share with and probably best to keep this stuff away from your family with the struggles your sister is going through. That way they can focus on helping her get through her treatment.
How is she doing by the way? Is she almost done with chemo?
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my poor sister had her #9 chemo two days ago and her Mo was not the one to give it since he was forced to take overdue vacation. The Dr. Who gave her the chemo said he sees the tumor still to close to her big arteries in the neck and that it is to risky. On top of that she told him her hip is been sore then he suggested to do an mri in case c is there. So she was very sad and depressed yesterday. I told her not to listen to a new Dr. To wait for her mo and to try no to let it bother her till she knows for sure. But I don't know.I am so worry she has lost a lot of weight and like Bb she did not quit smoking so I really worry. I try no to think of the worse but it's just not so easy.
How is milky? I must text her tmw so I know she is ok
Good night all I am so exhausted I ll go to bed
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Enerva- get some rest. What a hard week for you and sorry things are still tough for your sister. Keeping her in my prayers. All of you actually...
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omg I love you all I feel better today. I will go for a good ride then be back to study.
Bb, I am so chocked by your ex poem. Wow you see he did had feelings I am speechless
Ok I ll be back later
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BB - be glad you had a spiritual connection with another human being. someone never did.....
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Yes BB what a lovely soul connection and as its on a different plane it will always be there with love.............
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Enerva- glad you are better today.
Life- I was thinking of you today, are you doing okay? How are the proceedings going?
Milky- are you out there too? I think you are heading into the end of the semester/finals.
Melp and Kasa- how are you doing this weekend?
June- I was talking to a friend who was at the Met this morning before she heads back here from her biz travels. Made me wish I was in the city this weekend.
Lily- is it spring yet where you live? I know Europe tends to be a bit later than the US.
I have been on a mission this week to clean out some boxes and containers of storage in the garage. Some things had orderly storage like files from old jobs, careers, etc. Other containers were things I think I just threw things in and stored when I needed to get some things out of the house that were piling up (you know, the box of everything you tell yourself you will go through later?) Well, later has become now. I am looking at everything with a new eye as to whether it needs to be retained, recycling, thrown out or shredded once again.
Lots of memories come up along the way. Today I threw out some things around an MBA program I applied to and did not get into here around 2002. I already have a Masters and wanted this to be able to qualify for some better biz work at that time I was trying to do here at that time. I took 4 classes with them and had a 3.8 average but one class I got a B- in was why I was not accepted. One of my good friends from back east was visiting and said something was not right. This was right after 2001 and the recession then and so lots of folks were going back to school. I was upset at the time I did not get in, but it turned out to be a blessing. I later got accepted into the Stanford Certification program. A much better experience and credential to have, and I had a far better academic experience there. Hard to know when things don't work out, that there is usually a good reason we learn later. I still take certification courses through the local university for other things where I need some niche education.
Also came across some really fun and also sad old pictures today too. One picture made me LOL and I have to scan it as one of the gals in it just moved back to town and it will be fun to share with her on FB. A group of all of us dressed up in wild west gear. We look like a bunch of train robbers and lady's of the evening.
Got really windy so I had to stop working outside and in the garage. Time to head to the gym for weights and a swim.
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i went to a coffee place where bikers usually hang out.so it was nice met a nice lady we exchange # to ride together in the future. Then she left and other groups came I gave my real estate card out to two of them and it felt good to at least give my card out
I must try to give it so maybe someone says hey I need an agent lol Happy I rode and now I will study. A few pictures
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ha ha ha bb yes I hear you it is hard my clutch is a bit stiff and if I am on traffic it gets in my nerves but I love my bike so cool she is really good even though she is not new she handles very well. I love it. Today those guys where all showing off their bikes hahaha man are so funny it's like their expensive toys. One of them asked me what year is my bike hahaha I told him you should never ask what year my bike is she is great, looks amazing and that is all it is to it hahaha he smiled and said oh okay.
For me it's all about the freedom th ride makes me feel not about how expensive she is or how old what ever. But those man are like worse than woman and shoes hahahaah
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Enerva- I hand my business cards out like candy on Halloween. Always have them with you because you can meet people all over the place that may want your services or know of someone who is looking for a real estate agent and pass it along to them. I keep them in my wallet, extra ones in other spot in my purse, or in the car, etc.
I am glad you had a nice day, good for the soul! Nice to meet like minded friends to share things with. New friends! You go girl.
After the yard work, garage work and 2 hours at the gym, I am pooped! Good night my friends!
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oh everyone was out yesterday to enjoy the weather. Me too....first time going out without a jacket yesterday.
I am such a chicken to go alone networking.
E - I tried that kind of bike once and broke the tail light too heavy for me. It's my college crush s bike. I always wonder how he's doing. He's a good man.
Jazzy - wow you are on a roll....how far along? I live in a tiny apt but when I moved it was killing me.
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Good morning friends- I am going out for a bit this morning to a coffee shop that has some live music going on. I love this little place I discovered a few months back, and they told me about their music stuff in the spring and summer. Going for awhile for a fun break, before I come home to continue on with the house and yard stuff. It is a nice day out there, a bit on the cool side starting out. I think jeans and a sweatshirt will be in order this morning.
June- I am making good progress here. I have to chunk it up into small peices as it can be overwhelming I got through all the containers on one side of the garage and now I am going to work on the other side today. Not as much there, more consolidation than purge, or so I hope. I really want to finish the part where I need to review and throw out, and then will do the consolidation work starting tomorrow.
So cool June you had a nice warm day in the city. Temps have flipped and the east is the warmer one now, west got a blast of cold still working it's way out!
Another sister on BCO posted this yesterday and just love it. Here is to all you beautiful women on this thread. You all inspire me.
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BB- meditation can help you to be more present with what is. I don't think we can ever understand why people do what they do. I certainly have not with much that I have seen in my life. BC taught me the kindness of people I hardly knew, and some not great behaviors with people I thought were friends. Whatever anyone does in life has more to do with who they are, and not who we are.
I have been struggling with a friendship I feel is over and trying to find the right way to let things go. This friend was very much there for me with my appendix surgery, etc. but I know she has never been comfortable with me around the whole BC thing. And has kept her fair distance since and there have been other challenges. I talked to my friend I met this morning for the coffee shop music, and who knows her (but is not friends with her) and my friend clearly said "she has not really been part of your life now for awhile." So am going to just stop with all of it. Life is too short to spend time with people who don't care. My friend this morning is one who does and we always have fun together.
Music at the coffee shop this morning was SO fun. It was a young band called Cactus Tractor and featured three men and three women. All young folk and they did folk, rock, blues, etc. and harmonize well together. My friend came down about 45 min after she was done with church and we visited for hours. It was a fun morning! Good food, music and conversation.
Now back to yard and gardens and more paper review and purge! I stopped at Home Depot for some mulch and few other supplies and it was a mad house!
Hope you are all enjoying another lovely spring day where ever you are here in the northern hemisphere!
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well ladies today I went to the lake it was cold I did my usual pole walk wearing a sweater and did not enjoy much due to strong wind but felt good to do my walk and found out I am in pretty good shape. Before I could struggle to do the long walks and today I felt as if I never stopped. I haven't done it in so long. I look forward to the warm days ahead.now I am trying to read my book. Had some fruits for dinner and I can't wait for tonight to watch game of throne show. Lol how existing my life is ha ha ha hoping I won the lottery so we could all go to this hotels and relax need to share this amazing places I saw on fb today.
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Enerva- I have seen the one with the yurts before but sign me up for the place with the giraffes. That looks awesome!
I love Game of Thrones too. I am huge fan of everything on HBO.
BB- that show True Detective is going to be launching season 2 in June. It will be tough to top that first season. I was riveted from the get go.
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Bb, I love to dream lol of places I would love to be at. Look at these
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Enerva- where do you find all the cool travel pics?
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there is a Facebook page wait I ll give you the name lol
This one is in Canada. Not sure where
Milky let's goooo
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check this out
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Wow- what a great web site! That is a place I need to spend more time on!
I have a friend who wants me to go with her to Croatia and my sister wants me to go to South American to the Gallapagos Islands next spring. Not ready for any big international travel at this time, but I do think about traveling internationally again. This web site stimulates all the cool places out there I have yet to see.
Where is the most interesting place any of you have been? Either in the US or overseas? What did you like about it? Would you go back and if yes, why?
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i like the mountain one the best.....i think i am a mountain person. never like the beach that much.
the most interesting place....hm...actually the most interesting travel experience was my backpacking europe because i joined the school foreign study program. the whole thing lasted 7 months. i missed it so much. never been back but i will go back again.
i love the beautiful people quote/image. it's so true. i got very annoyed by those young, full of sense of entitlement people. they don't understand hard work but want to get to the top in a blink.
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June- wow, 7 months in Europe. How wonderful was that. How many countries were able to get to? I love Europe. I have been to France, Monte Carlo, Italy (twice), Malta, Greece and England so far.
I have traveled to the Middle East, Europle (couple times), Central Amercia (couple times), So America (Venezuela where our friend Enerva is from). My trip to the Middle East was my first overseas trip in my late twenties and still the most incredible trip to date. We went to Jordan and spent time in Amman and visited the ancient city of Petra. We went all over Israel, then took a bus across the Sinai Desert to Egypt.
Egypt was a place I always had a dream of going to as a young girl, so it was the first big trip I took as an adult. We were only there for three days in Cairo, but we did so much. Went to and inside the Great Pyramids. There are also some other pyramids there that are even older than the well known ones. The Museum of Antiquities that has all the things from the pyramids and upper Nile areas, including all the gold and statues from the shrines. I would love to go back to Egypt and do a cruise and see Luxor.
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BB- too bad about the rowing getting cancelled. It looks like we may get some t-storms here, although not forecasted.
When I went back to the gym after no exercise for a while, my arms did not look to great. I just wore t-shirts with short sleeves.
Have you thought about getting some inexpensive free weights to start doing some work on the bi-ceps/triceps and the like? I know the rowing will be a great upper body work out.
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BB- which friend?
Don't answer that other girl's calls. She sounds weird and stalker-ish. If you tell someone you don't want to keep in touch and they persist, something ain't right. Don't let these people fool you into thinking they care either.
I had a guy I knew from work back east that I connected with when I moved out here. We did a few things together, never dated, but he became extremely possessive of me. I would not hear from him for months, then he would call up and demand some of my time and be angry when I told him I was not available. I just told him I was busy with getting my new life started and did not have time to see him anymore. He left me angry obsessive messages for 8 months before he finally gave up. He did tell me at some point along the way he had some mental health issues. I just felt unsafe around him.
I am having some ongoing issues with a friend who I have been having issues with since last summer. The friend is not being a friend and just tired of her BS. Talked it through with my friend I saw yesterday and she pointed out this other woman has not really been part of my life much for awhile and by stopping things, I should be able to coast away. Ready to let it go.....
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i traveled in Italy extensively...many small towns and major cities. i went to Sicilia as well....and most of the western europe. the east europe was Prague only. it was still september but snow on the ground already...i had a great time. especially in italy. when i was sitting in a small theater in sicily, a bunch of little kids came visit as well. they basically sourrounded me and asking me questions. my italian wasn't good and their english was better than my italian...haha....i really cherrish that memory. that's 18 years ago. they're all grown up now. one thing i noticed that after i went to germany and north than that, the showers were hot....i took many not so warm showers in italy and france. may be it's a youth hostel thing....i actually want to go back to Rome and Florence...very romantic.
and i spent 2.5 months in Liverpool. the custom gave me a hard time passing the border, the whole bus was waiting for me....i was ready to take my stuff and head to the airport. and they eventually let me in. i think i told them that i had a US visa and had no interests staying in the UK longer than i had to....what i really wanted to do was to give them my middle finger. and i think some english were very pretentious/hypocritical. there's this old guy offering me room and board, just the way he articulate the whole deal was so elevating his intention (with a hole in his sock) BUT he wanted $. and there's a french young man overheard it and helped me out. i have no intention ever go back to england. French were arrogant but still think english were just something else. i had much better time in europe (mainland)....i could understand my classmates in liverpool perfectly but liverpool accent was hard to understand, reminds me of the movie "trainspotting"....my classmate one day went to buy some model supplies and he got a black eye.....someone randomly just punched him.
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BB- I do believe we have friends that come in and out of our lives. My best friend from college and I have been like that. She is back in the picture again and has been interviewing out here for work with one of the national labs, so we got to see each other in Feb for the first time since around 1999. My best friend from grad school and I were not that close, but she was right there when I got diagnosed and came to help me with my first rads trip to AZ.
The friend I am having issues with feels to me like she no longer respects or wants the friendship. She has not been that close for awhile, but our lives have also had a lot going on the past few years that have had us consumed. She had a failing mother she was care giving, and it was part of our bond. Elder care stuff. Her mother was failing the year I was finishing up treatment. We lost touch for awhile as I was dealing with recovery and she had her mother stuff going on. We were both trying to cope and survive in our situations. I really got that. She did call me when her mother died, and I did go to the services. I also did a few other things for her last year as a response to that loss to help her.
Later last summer, I found out despite asking her to keep my health issues private that she had shared some of them with a card group she is part of. I will tell you I was shocked when she mentioned it, and said she knew she should have kept her mouth shut. I re-interated that my health issues were not up for public discussion. I was really pissed. I decided I was not going to share anything more with her on the health front. From that point on, I took a step back. I decided we might only go to a concert once and awhile but no longer someone I could be close with. Because the trust was gone. I found out my friend is a gossip.
She has filled her life up with volunteer work to fill the void in her life with her mother's passing last year. I realized she really does not have any free time and really have not been trying to initiate anything. We tried to snowshoe earlier in the year, but the fresh snow melted quickly so that was a bust. I was told the only time she had to see me was on 3 day weekend as she is too busy with her job and her weekend volunteer work. Made me want even less to bother.
What sort of made me say "enough" (although a confidence being betrayed is more than enough itself) are several requests to get together for my birthday that I knew would never happen. Lets get together, you figure out when, I won't respond, but then surface later and try to get you to plan it all over again. I mean really, who wants to have a birthday get together be this difficult and put on me to figure out? All my other friends who wanted to acknowledge it did so in ways they wanted, and well, my birthday was almost a month ago now.
One of my OTHER good friends I met at the coffee house music yesterday was sharing a similar challenge she had, and something she decided she just need to stop trying with. I told her I had stop trying with this other friend (who she knows but is not friends with). I told her I am at the point I just am going to stop communicating all together. Just does not feel good anymore between the lack of trust and the way she makes me feel like she is doing me a big favor by getting together. One should feel equal or better when spending time around friends and trust me, I have not felt good around her for awhile now. The friend yesterday said this other gal is really has not been in my life very much for awhile so if I just stop taking the hooks to get together (which are always mine to figure out anyways), it will just suspend. She is very right so I will now go silent. I do have tix to see a concert with the woman and her neice in July and will go but decided to just let everything else go until then. And I believe after too.
Been doing a bit of review of people who used to be there but are not, and have no problem letting things end when they need to. I do believe people are in your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. I feel the season of this friendship is ending. I just feel life is to short to spend time with people who don't care. I am at much more peace with it today than I have been which is good as it means I am finally ready to let go. The connection is gone. I have some nice friends here I see regularly and whom enjoy my company and don't make it hard to connect. That is where my energy goes now.....
Thanks for e-listening!
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I have let many ppl go when I felt the friendship was beyond amend. For some reason I was always being used. I think ppl just took my kindness as being desparation.
But I also come to realize that no one is perfect. So if the friendship is still on mutual respectful background I would still let it unfold organically. I learned not to expect much.
I do enjoy this support group....no judgement no expectation.
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hi ladies, milky is fine she sent me a text.
just busy with her exams but good health which made me happy. I also wondering how is piper? Hope she is also ok traveling or busy with life.
I have to tell you about friends..... Hum well I just came home from picking up my tires from a friends place. This man is a great guy he offered to store them for me last year and he actually offered to keep them there if I want to keep storing the tires at his garage. I won't, I thank him I told him he is a great friend but I feel I can't do that. BTW I know this guy in the past kind of liked me and he is also like you described some friends a bit posesive so I made up the story that I found a small storage place close by which works fine since I need to store my real estate stuff too. He was kind of pics and very pushy almost to the point I was getting annoyed lol now driving home it actually made me depressed hahahahah the fact that I have no one where to store my tires that it's always the same always a dame straggle for everything. Then I remembered when my ex and I broke up and he sent me my tires with his uncle one day. I felt like crap cuz his uncle gave me the tires and also gave me my keys.my ex no only sent me my tires which he used to keep at his huge garage. He has a 15 cars garage huge anyway. All of it came back to my head like a bad movie. His uncle extended his hand and said oh ya he sent you this. It was my Place 's keys. He had a set which he never really used but still.
Anyway tmw I must bring my car to the mechanics to change the winter tires then rent a storage place to store my tires.
Good night ladies
I agree I also have no patience for friends this days.
My girlfriend the one that I had to babysit her dog, not sure you guys remember I had to sleep over her place to care for her dog. Anyway she got upset cuz last Saturday she invited me to go out with her, her hubby and a friend and I told her I had plans. I honestly don't want to meet any man right now and she is trying to introduce me to her husband said friends. I just have not mood for any of that.
Good night
Oh I have not news yet on the hr thing my stomach hurts everytime I get an email from the manager he has giving me 4 new task in 2 days mayor issues I need to resolve. On top of all I had already
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