Radiation recovery
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Lemon I too am in your pocket and your prayers.
Joan thanks for the support. No BM today so I am in a lot of pain from laxatives and extra fiber.
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People, please - move over already ! Gosh, Lemon, your pocket is full today! I am thinking of you and hoping all goes well.
Hugs to everyone!!
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Feeling really down tonight.Pretty worthless too.Work was a nightmare as I suspected.My manager wanted an explanation for why I couldn't get more done on Friday.Then tonight she couldn't figure out why I only had time to add on 1 more for Wednsday.She wanted to see like7 more on the books not just 1 more.Never mind I had 11 Bone Densities today.
I flat out told her I was doing my best and it didn't seem to be good enough.She just said I guess you can't do it even after me getting you organized and just said I don't know what to say and walked out kind of like that's it for you.Maybe they would be better off without me.Maybe I do have problems staying organized .But I crack under that much pressure and I'm done.
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(((Lemon))) speedy healing...all our love!
Josie - ah...grr...what a Monday...what pressure...horrible work environment...hang in there...a new opportunity must be coming...keep those applications out there...bite your tongue...breathe...just do your best and know that we are in your pocket {{{squeeze}}}
Kate - sorry you are so uncomfortable and bms are so slow in moving things out...hoping your appointments this week bring a smile and relief...cheers 5/5
xoxoEnjoying the Voice tonight...gosh I wish I could carry a tune...guess I'll just continue to sing in my car...no one to critique...
Pocket Parties coast to coast!
(((Hugs)))
Cindy
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Cindy, Thanks for your support. I know there are people on here dealing with way more than me.I'm sorry I Just needed to vent.Kind of like a cyber hug.
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Cindy thank you for the support
Lemon I hope things are going well
I need prayers for tomorrow. at 4 tonight doc called me and said my CT scans were not good and I need a stent and to start chemo ASAP. I have an appointment to get a kidney stent at 4 tomorrow. I am also needing a port. Doc asked me if he thinks there is enough vein left to start one chemo treatment, and I said i hope so, but I don't know. That is how much of a rush he is to start chemo. Someone called me around 4 and I think she is from chemo, but I missed the call. I have an appointment wirth the clinical trial doctor Wednesday and if I qualify doc wants to start with whoever comes up first. Then this is very strange. I called my social worker and when I was talking to her I had the call broken into. The party said something about a stent and transportation or compensation, but he had such a heavy Indian accent I could not understand him. Then he got cut off and tried again, but we never reconnected. My surtgeon is Indian so I thought he would know something about it. I lleft a voicemail and he called back. I was trembling with fear by the time I spoke to him, but he put my mind at a little bit of ease. I thought I would be dying any second by the time I got to him. He said relax this is not an extreme medical emergency. You do need a stent and 4 pm tomorrow is fiine. yoiu have enough time for that. although He gave me some comfort, I am still cared. Every day since I have come home my face has looked worse. I thought I must have lost an incredible amount of weight, and have been stuffing myself with food. Now I realize it is not that it is a bad kidney that is making me look like the kiss of death. Please help me pray that everything can be done in time.
I
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oh Kate! Sending you a big cyber hug. I hope all gives well today and that you start to feel better.
Josie, I hope something turns around for you quickly in the job situation.
Lemon, I was thinking about you yesterday, and I'm hoping that you're resting up and feeling good after surgery.
Hope all is well with everyone! Love to all ---
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Josie, the level of stress this woman is putting on you is unhealthy. In my ever-so-humble opinion, it would be a great idea to tell her that you feel terrorized and will be contacting your doctor to discuss the damage her treatment of you is causing. I know you don't want to rock the boat, Josie, but for your own protection (jobwise and healthwise), I think you need to let this woman know that her behavior is damaging to you and needs to stop. She also needs to remember (or possibly be reminded) that there are laws addressing hostile workplace issues.
If (like me) you feel that the whole cancer experience, especially radiation, has left you a bit spacey and unorganized, it is absolutely time to communicate that to her (and your doctor) and ask for a "reasonable accommodation." I posted this somewhere, not sure if it was this thread, but I have a reasonable accommodation of a 20-hour work week. Because I am a commissioned salesperson (helping people with financial issues, especially with job change and retirement issues), this translates into a 50% reduction in my required production. It's just over a year since I finished rads, and I am still having huge problems with organization and concentration. And energy comes and goes. One day, I can work flat out for eight or ten hours, the next, maybe I'll be barely achieve one task. I never know which day I'll have. If you're having a similar experience, please don't hesitate to acknowledge that you're still healing.
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So sorry all this seems to be hitting at once, Kate. Of course, it's wonderful that you have all the resources right there, and that they can juggle their schedules to fit you right in. I know you expected all this to kick in right after your Chicago trip, but not all at once! This all-at-once thing would sure throw anyone for a loop. So today you have first the appointment with the trial interviewer and then the stent? Busy day! Once you have the stent and that first chemo, you should start feeling better asap. Of course they'll find a vein!
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Brookside, thanks I agree, I think I'm still recovering from my whole cancer experience.And the level of stress is getting to me.I haven't had any panic attacks yet but that may be next.I was so stressed around the Holidays when my schedule was full and They wouldn't give me extra hours I would have a panic attack just talking about work.At that time I was seeing a counselor at the Cancer center paid for by the Cancer center.But there was a limited amount of visits.
BTW, this nurse that is stressing me so bad used to be an oncology nurse for years.She should know better.It's not like I'm not trying.I know she may be ultimately making one last effort to save my job but is it worth saving?
She knows these doctors want more Bone Densities or they may close bone density.At this point I'm fine with that.It's not worth it to me anymore.
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Kate, I'm so sorry your having kidney problems.That is probably part of your swelling problem.When the kidneys aren't functioning you swell .
My prayers are with you.I hope they can get you feeling better soon.Why can't they at least get that port in for you? I didn't think the procedure was that big of a deal.They do it every day and you requested it.I am actually pretty shocked they did any chemo without a port.
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Kate-so sorry you are enduring such pain and anxiety. That was a bizarre phone call; at least your doctors are accessible. Of course you are scared but you also must know all us are praying for you non-stop. Not trying to sound preachy but it's in God's hands so please continue to have faith.
Josie- I had RADS too and almost 3 years out I still have issues like concentrating. You have said your peace - good for you. Doesn't sound like your boss is very sympathetic and it is surprising given she is an oncology nurse. I frankly don't think you can ever please her to her satisfaction. Maybe an exercise in futility. Regardless you can only do the best you can. Stressing out is making it twice as hard on you which all of us know doesn't help the situation we are all in. Praying for you too girl to find another job. Btw I had to quit my job because the stress was off the chart too so I opted for early retirement. Couldn't afford to have no money coming in. Husband has a good job but we need 2 incomes. College tuition for our last one was pricey to say the least but at least now we are done with that. Keep the faith. Diane
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Thanks Diane, I had a group interview today .Weird.I've never been to a group interview.She talked for like 30-40 min and then gave us a math test.I wasn't prepared for that.But did take notes and was the only one who asked questions.The one applicant turned hers in almost right away and left.I tried to finish.The first page I did fine on but the second page was decimals and percentages.It's been a while since I've done that so I didn't get to finish.But none of us did.Only once I interviewed and was given a math test.That was for my externship and They were so mean to me and asked me to leave or ended the externship about 1 week into it.They told my teacher a bunch of lies and he believed them.I did end up having a great place for my externship he placed me in a podiatry office and They loved me.I learned a lot there.
I hear you about needing 2 incomes.I really don't want to have to work full time but financially we need that extra income.
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Josie- I had a group interview 2x at FedEx. Both were disasters. In the first one they were just going through the motions because they already had someone in mind. They told me to go to this office and write the history of FedEx, I'm like are you flipping serious? The second one I really wanted. First phase of the interview went well; one guy interviewed me, the second phase they brought it all these secretaries in the department to drill me which was ridiculous and by then I was sick of it. I told them I wasn't applying for Fred Smith's job..good grief. Game over. You probably did better than you think. Good luck. Diane
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((((( Kate, Lemon, Josie )))))
In your pockets and in our thoughts&prayers
Cindy
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Kate, thinking of you. I pray these procedures will bring you much relief. I know you are scared but you are in good hands and you have so many family and friends supporting and loving you. Let's get through this and see how you feel after! Big hug, Kate!
Josie, I pray you get a new job soon! I cannot imagine treating someone like that, that woman is a nightmare and yes, I agree that this is bordering on harassment and terrorism. I think you can let her know in a strong and positive way, without letting your anger take over, that she is way, way out of line. I don't know if you have kept a log of everything that has transpired but just in case this might ever progress to a situation where you want to hire an attorney, something like that would be helpful. Hang in there, you know we all support you!
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Diane, Cindy and Big D, thanks so much for the support and encouragement.In a much better mood today since I'm off.
Kate, hope your doing ok.
Lemon, gentle hugs. Hope your doing ok sweetie.
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gemini14, brookside, josie, edwards, qndCindy and Bigd beating thanks for mthe support. This nis my packed in medical proceducre schedule for 1 week. tomorrow wed May 7 I am going for an appointment with the clinical trial doctor, Thursday I have to be at UCLA hospital at 9am for a two hour check in prosessl, 1 hour procdure for a port and then 1 to 2 hour recovery. period. Fri. Sat and Sun I have off. Monday I have to be at st Johns hospital at 2 pm for general anesthesia surgery to take place at 4 for the surgery to plACE 2 KIDNEY STANETS. I WILL STAY OVER NITE and either start chemo or the clinical trial on Wednesday. What scares me is how much more constipated will I be and that none of my doctors are talking optimisticially.
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Just popping in to say that Kate, I am thinking of you and saying a prayer that things will get easier. I know you have a lot coming up and I am keeping you in my thoughts. You are a champ!!
Josie, you are definitely working in a hostile workplace. I think it is time to talk to someone who might be your direct supervisor's supervisor. Mention what you have gone through recently with your health issue and that you are working as hard and as fast as you can. Also mention it is very difficult when your supervisor is following you around constantly and not giving you any space or room to do your job. You might even mention the words "it feels like a hostile workplace" to me. This person knows nothing about supervision and motivation.
I will write more tomorrow. Just wanted to check in quickly. I am in the process of cleaning the country house and getting it up for sale Hubby needs a place closer to the hospital where he does 3/4 of his work. The time has come. I am shredding paper like a mad woman and the basement is next. I will check in tomorrow. Cindy, I envy you! Fly fishing is my dream. Gotta try it soon.
Love to all of you ladies.
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Josie, please listen to Big D and Gigil. You really, really must tell this gorgon (in Greek mythology, anyone who gazed upon the gorgon Medusa was turned to stone, and isn't that about the effect this modern gorgon has on you?) that her actions must stop. It is important to use the correct language. "Workplace harrassment," "hostile workplace," and "workplace accomodation" are definitely called for, and possibly even "attorney," as is a very neutral tone. If you are not comfortable addressing her directly, go to her boss or the managing partner. I know you will have a new job really, really soon, but you owe it to yourself, to whomever replaces you in this sweatshop, and even to that manager, to educate her on this issue.
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Wow, what a whilwind schedule, Kate. I know you're in a scarey place, but isn't it wonderful that the medical system has all this great stuff to help you. So looking forward to having all this getting-down-to-business stuff behind you.
Kate, it's clear to everyone that you need a nurse more than once/week. Can't your gastro doc get someone else over to you? Or can you go to her office?
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Also, Josie, just because this woman was an oncology nurse, please do not assume she understands the long term effects rads can have on our concentration/organization abilities, or even associates them with youthful, vibrant, you. Chances are she worked with people in the middle of nasty chemo reactions or maybe post-surgical complications. It sounds as though she is aware of your BC history, but I think she is legally prohibited from treating you any differently because of potential post-treatment brain fog unless and until you clue her in that this is an issue, and a legally protected issue. In short, I guess she needs your input to help her become a decent manager.
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((((Josie)))) So sorry hon...hopefully you will get another job offer and be able to tell that manager to shove the job where the sun don't shine! I still have brain fog too, but I have been attributing that to the aromasin (exemestane) rather than the rads, but who knows. I did not have chemo so can't speak to that issue.
((((((Kate))))) Hon, you are in my thoughts and prayers. Hopefully once the chemo begins, they can knock back whatever is causing the kidney issues. Do you have someone who can come here and post on your behalf in case you can't? We want to know what is happening and we will worry like crazy if we don't hear from you for a little while. I know that you have been able to post from the hospital before, but if you can't, we hope someone can let us know how you are doing. Praying very hard for you to recover from this latest set-back as quickly as possible!
Lemon, hope your suregery went well!
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Hi. I finished radiation at the end of February. For the last month or so my skin on my back and the back of both arms has been feeling like it's sunburned. My husband said it looked a little red on one of the arms last night but it's not usually. I think it was because I had been rubbing it. Anyhow, could this be an after/delayed SE of radiation? Even on the back of the arm on the non-radiated side? I've been slathering lotion on but it's still bugging me.
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I haven't had a similar experience, but I do know that the rads department fully expects followup questions and concerns for many months after we finish treatment. You could call them, or maybe set up an appointment with your RO. In my case, it was a nurse practitioner who fielded most of the post-treatment issues. I saw her a few times over several months and she was wonderful.
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(((Kate))) In your pocket for the procedure. I pray it is successful and brings relief. It has been overwhelming for you.
Is it possible to just look at what you need to do for today and maybe the next day and not look at all the issues at once? One step at a time.... Sending hugs and prayers for today...and for great improvement in your situation.Josie, I am glad you can feel better on your days off. What is happening to you does border on harrassment. I guess you could keep a job journal. Is anyone else being targeted? It's happening to a friend's daughter who returned to a thrift shop job after 10 months of disability. There is a new boss and they have set her up for firing. They are shunning her, making her talk to the main headquarters about performance expectations, and saying she doesn't have the experience (heck, she worked there for years before the new boss came). Pure harrassment...they must want to hire someone else. It is just plain wrong. I have a union where I work, and it is nearlly impossible to "get rid of someone" unless the employee blatantly violates contract.
I wish there were some way to address this. A new job could be the answer. Still sending hugs and prayers.I am rethinking my cognitive impairment....I was always a multi-tasker and disorganized but I accomplished a lot. Now, I cannot even look at a "lot of things or chores" that need organizing.
Yes, BC, surgery (easy part), rads, and now the Femara are all taking a physical and emotional toll. I have a very active life and a job I like. But I feel like I have lost my edge. I think others may have noticed.Even now, I have a pile of papers to grade and record and must make a lesson for tonight...and I only have 4 hours. I don't know where to start. I can make it look good but there is always something left undone. And eventually, people see my weaknesses.
Hope to catch up here later...thinking of the recovering ladies....
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Hi Ladies- Just stopping in to say hello. Still in Grand Rapids at my cousins till next week. My laptop died so I have hijacked my cousins for a minute. Hope everyone is ok. Still cold here but supposed to warm up tomorrow finally. Allergies have been crazy here.
By the way my small pipe repairs turned into a complete redo of my leaking 2 floors. The house still had the original pipes and what a mess. Tore out 2 walls and the ceiling to get it fixed. Glad I am not there. Will back read what I can.
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Kate- your doctors are taking good care of you. I so hope you get some relief ASAP.
mcgis- It sounds like SEs from RADS. I had 33 treatments big never really had issues except fatigue. Def call your doctor.
Josie- good suggestions about contacting higher ups but in Tennessee where I live it wouldn't do you any good. Tennessee is a right to work state so if your boss doesn't like the color of your hair he/she can fire you and make it stick. Fair - not but they can and do get away with it here. Hopefully not the case where you live. Diane
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Read a few pages.....
Kate - Good grief!!! I am so glad you got to see your kids and family before starting this new chapter. I am in your pocket and praying for you. The weather is going to be hot and muggy tomorrow so be glad you did not get that.
Josie - That job has to go. That is so hostile and you do not need the added stress.Makes me want to get on a plane and come get them. I still have bad concentration issues. Feels like I am getting dementia all the time. Was tested a few years back and they blamed the steroids but now who knows.
mcgis - Sounds like a delayed reaction to me. I was worst after rads actually skin wise. They told me I would be. Keep slathering and using the cremes and aloe. My armpit completely peeled after rads. Two layers of skin came off and it took 3 mos for my skin under the breast to stop itching etc. I still use Kleenex under there to help with moisture and it has been over a year..
Lemon - Surgery went well I hope. In your pocket.
Gigil - We are thinking the same about these houses. Ick. They have to go. Mine would not have passed inspection if I do not finish these repairs. Then it is gone.
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Busy place today.Thanks for all the suggestions and encouragement.
I went into work with the determination to try as hard as I can to stay on top of it.
I felt like I did ok and after our little confrontation or discussion Monday.She has laid off a little and found someone else to do my benefits for me and add all the ones on that she wants.That's cool with me.
As far as a higher manager.We have an office manager who intimidate s the heck out of me and makes me look stupid any chance she can so yeah...about that.I could go to the docs and try to let them know but last time someone went over their heads she was written up for something really stupid.
I felt a little better today just having that extra stress off me.But I still pushed myself hard to concentrate and keep up.I was a little tense by the time I left.But my co worker reassured me there is no way the doctor that is in charge of all the bone densities would let them close bone density.So sounds like she's lying just to boost our revenue and make me think that my job was on the line.She also said that the past bone density techs didn't do near as good of a job as I'm doing and that was nice to hear.
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