Radiation recovery
Comments
-
BigD/Joan, you're sure using your stress well--newly gorgeous hair and newly uncluttered cosmetics cache. If this whirlwind keeps up, you'll have your whole house decluttered and organized and spiffed right up.
Bunkie,one of the things to keep in mind is that sellers do not always get back the amount they have invested in renovations. Putting the house on the market as is makes it available to a larger group of buyers. If it does not sell right away, you can continue to renovate and raise the price as you go. And you can breathe clean indoor air somewhere else. Are you serious? Did someone really offer you $20,000? Creepy! I imagine him/her going around seeking out desperate people who will do anything for a little immediate cash, or naive elders who have no idea what their homes are worth. Double creepy!
0 -
Bunkie - I can believe an investor offered you that paltry amount. Some investors think if they offer money upfront without any negotiating or even offer cash a homeowner will jump on it. One of my neighbors has a house that was appraised at $230,000 and they had a Craigslist offer of $100,000 - CASH. As if paying in cash would offset $130,000. On the flip side another neighbor sold his house on Craigslist for $189,000..and that one was a good deal so you never know. Granted $20k is insulting.
Josie - bless your heart you sound so tired and defeated. You are getting it from all sides so its no wonder you are on overload. Something has to give. I hope your meeting goes well and not intended to further beat you down or force you to resign. Stand firm. Years ago I worked for a company that I knew was trying to push me out. Long story, short one of my brothers had been the CEO and was very well liked and respected. He died suddenly and they hired this guy. He wanted me out from the getgo and he finally got his wish but when he called me in his office with my sorry excuse for a manager, he told me he was firing me. I sat there for a minute and said okay don't agree but its not the end of the world. He was taken aback and said don't you want to discuss it? I said no there was no point I would just find a job somewhere else. I have to admit I amazed myself not getting hysterical - serves no purpose - or fighting for my job. Thing is I guess I didn't really care and I wasn't about to let him see me sweat...as they say. I did land a job soon after and a much better one.
I know you are so ready to do the Johnny Paycheck thing(take this job....) and you should get the chance to resign - just make sure its your idea not theirs. We all know how tough this is for you that is compounded by your medical issues. Also don't let them use your medical concerns as an excuse; that makes it easy for them to do what they want in the name of she just couldn't perform the job. You will get through this like the champ we know you are...we are right there with you all the way? Keep the faith.
Diane
0 -
BROOKSIDE, thanks for the support.
I just want to call in sick tommorow.I know I should just face the music but I know their going to say well you had only 4 bone densities on Friday why couldn't you get it done? So I have to make sure I have my defense all lined up.I had phone calls, results to be charted and also if I didn't get my provider list gone through to get potential add ons I knew I would be in trouble.So it's like "what do you want me to do first?" I tried to concentrate on my benefits for Monday.I did that and finished but the ones for Wednsday are not all finished I got 4 done for that day but have 7 left to do.I know this will just add to their fuel.But maybe I could just try to get some benefits for Wednsday as soon as I get there Monday morning.Unfortunately when I get on the phone with insurance companies there is no telling how long it will take.Some are in no big hurry and will make you repeat everything back to them even if you just told the computer prior to that.
Diane, thanks for understanding also.Thanks for sharing your story with me.Your right I am to the point of "take this job and shove it " but can't since I haven't found anouther one yet.My goal was to stick it out at least until vacation so I could use some of my well deserved PTO.My kids haven't had a vacation in like 2-3 yrs.My mother in law gave us $$$$$ towards our trip.Way more than I ever expected and my hubby got some of his money owed to him for extra hours/ vacation.Unfortunately we've spent a little of it but I get paid the day before I leave and he gets paid Friday.We will do ok.I plan on having at least 1 alcoholic beverage.We are leaving Thursday June 19th.Kentuckylake here we come!!
0 -
Josie, Brookside gives you excellent advice. You need to remind them that you are recovering from the trauma of the breast cancer treatment, and you are not quite yourself yet. And then the rest that she said. You really do have a temporary disability. In talking amongst ourselves, I realize I have been dealing with a temporary disability too. I thought I was just losing it, but it seems quite normal for us at first, doesn't it? We need time to come back from something so earth shattering and body depleting. You are a bright, capable woman who is doing her very best. Always remember that.
Joan, you and I could be night time prowlers together. I am up half the night as well. I don't settle in until 1:30 or 2:00 a.m., no matter how hard I try. Today I lazed in bed a bit, since DH is off working. I went to the hairdresser yesterday and that was so nice. I got a scalp and hand massage as well. I haven't had a haircut and color professionally since before Dad took a turn for the worst - about a year ago.
My sons seem to be having their Father's Day celebrations today. One is making the rounds to fathers and the other is having his daughter over for dinner. Wish one of them would think to invite me. I am home alone. Poor me, huh? What I really need to do is go out and buy some healthy food and drive through a coffee place. I have no food in this townhouse.
Those of you who have husbands and fathers, give them a special hug today. I sent my DH a nice message to wake up to. Now, for that coffee...
0 -
Joan - trip to CA is for our 6 month check ups...plan only a few weeks. Hubby invited friends for a summer visit to TX ...I had fingers crossed for late August, but they announced mid July...so my pacific coast dreams just went out to sea:( so after their visit will rethink escape from TX heat. Admire your late nites...I crash at midnight and jump up at daybreak...
Happy Fathers Day ...to our dads, sons, brothers, and men of influence!
Off to dance...those sticky buns somehow made it in my mouth now have to work them off!
(((Hugs)))
Cindy
0 -
Gaaaah, don't mention those sticky buns...but they sure were good
0 -
Josie, you've gotten good advice, and I want to add another idea. You said that when you get on the phone with an insurance company, there's no telling how long it will take. How much do your manager, and anyone else who might be in that meeting, really know about how your job unfolds from hour to hour? You might try writing a little timeline of a typical day or at least afternoon. Maybe type it up so it's easy to read, if you can. 2:00, Called Dingbat Insurance; on hold; done at 2:12; completed paperwork until 2:20, and so on. I'm picturing you doing it this evening. Then during this meeting you can say, "I thought you might be wondering, so I sat down and wrote out what it takes to get this work done, and here's what it shows." You can imply that you, too, were surprised at how long it takes--that puts you all on the same side of the question, at least potentially. Then move directly from the data and narrative you've taken control of into Brookside's problem-solving mode: "So since it takes this amount of time to do 3 cases, it would reasonably require X more hours a week to catch up with 7." Also it's important, again, to emphasize that the accommodations you need for your BC recovery are temporary and reasonable. BC recovery doesn't make it impossible for you to do the job, but it does require a bit of flexibility, and if you can roughly quantify that (you need 10% more time for the next 4 months, or something, which is within the reasonable accommodations contemplated by the XXX Act, whatever was in those links I posted), so much the better.
Perhaps you've done all this, not sure. I just know that staying calm, doing what you can to control the picture that's being painted, matter-of-factly and peacefully pointing out your legal rights, and offering solutions would be good moves for a meeting like this. And of course you'll have your whole posse with you at that meeting!
I'm reading along and sending my best hopes for beating all the challenges faced by the rest of you, and cheering triumphs like Lemon's thankfully normal recovery. BigD, in your pocket big-time. Off on a two-day college trip with my daughter, back Tuesday night. Might be wired while I'm gone, might not.
0 -
Gigil, thanks for responding.I know that Brookside had a lot of good ideas and good points.I'm glad you got to sleep in a little.Me too
Hope you got your coffee.
RunFree, thanks also.Thanks for the good ideas too.I promise to get my speech and defense in order.I promise to put my best foot forward and no matter what happens I will walk away from the meeting with my pride in tact.
0 -
Hope you all had a nice weekend. Seems to go by so fast.
Josie, I will be thinking about you tomorrow. I can't believe what you are having to do through, it just is not fair. My boss is not the most understanding person but would never treat me like what you are having to deal with. Keep your cool but stand up for yourself. Give them the facts. I so wish you could find a new job. Please let us know how it goes tomorrow.
RunFree, thanks my pocket pal. Have a wonderful trip with your daughter and we will see you in two days.
Cindy, sorry you have to put your trip off but you sure will appreciate being out of the Texas heat in August. Geesh, sticky buns. Love them.
GigiL, glad you got to the hairdresser, I went too this weekend. Doesn't it feel good? Sorry you were alone, I know the drill there
I did go out this evening to do my shopping for the week. Bought lots of fruits and veggies, some nuts, and was watching HSN tonight and decided to invest in a small order of the green boxes that are supposed to keep things fresh for literally weeks. It seems lie fruits and veggies in particular go bad so quickly, and I hate having to discard them if I do not get them eaten, so I am going to try these green boxes and see if I like them.Brookside, thanks, I am determine to do a little at a time, and actually might hire someone to help me go through some of my things and get them out. I used to do a lot of scrapbooking, and I have literally thousands of dollars of supplies and paper and tools, oh dear. I spent wayyyyyyyyyyyyy too much money on things and sure do wish I had some of that money back now. Was so dumb. I may donate all of it to a school, it is really good stuff and needs to find a home.
Bunkie, I agree with Diane, that $20,000 offer is just crazy. Amazing that someone would even think you would take that. You are in my thoughts. Praying you get relief from your dizziness and a good offer on that house.
Lemon, how you doing? Thinking of you.
I have a big project to keep me occupied on Monday and Tuesday at work. And my boss, to my great surprise, has installed two really nice stationary bikes and a treadmill in one of the empty offices that I can use on my breaks. I intend to take full advantage of that. I am in pretty lousy shape, but I am dropping weight and the exercise is going to be exactly what I need to get stronger and better.
"Keep looking up, cause that's where it all is."
0 -
Big D thanks for understanding.I hope I don't get fired or so frustrated I quite.I even dreamed about it a little last night.I went on a pre vacation cleaning spree tonight.Not sure what was wrong yesterday but had more energy this evening.I cleaned my countertop until it was spotless of clutter and sparkling clean.We have ants again.And that's the first thing I do is start cleaning when I find them.Don't see quite as many after a little cleaning.I even did part of the floor and DH helped with the kitchen table.It seems to be a catch all for clutter since we have a tiny kitchen and 1counter top.I think DH and I had maybe a slight virus.I had it in my tummy tonight and my sinuses drained all night which had me wake up with a sore throat and a little dizzy. Well enough about me.Sorry
All this talk about hairdressers.I called mine last week and we haven't connected.I hope to get a cut and color Tuesday if she can.
0 -
Wishing you strength and peace, Josie. It might be helpful to "assume" that they are really trying to be helpful, just too dumb to figure out how to do it. Keep strong. Keep calm. You have nothing to lose (that job is toast anyway), so you might just as well smile sweetly and gently repeat that, your key points. In that pocket!
0 -
in your corner Josie! It sounds like u r well prepared for your meeting. As others have said, your supervisors don't know your job, you do. It's not just a matter of seeing patients and billing. I know you will calmly make your case. Don't let me out of your pocket, or I will give them a good kick!
0 -
Thanks everyone for the support.I will update everyone tonight after work.
0 -
No way to catch up since I have been off the boards a few days although I did try to read back a little. Saw that Kate accepted your friend request...awesome!
Josie, just wanted you to know I am thinking of you today. Hopefully everything goes well for YOU, not them. xo
BigD, what a confusing state of affairs for you. Happy they did not definitively say it is mets though...still a chance that it might not be mets or MM either. Hugs and know I am thinking of you.
Bunkie, so glad to see you! 20K?????? REALLY????? Sometimes they are just feeling you out to see if you are desperate enough to take that lowball offer. Sheesh, that is a really low one though. Yikes!
To everyone else, since I don't remember much of anything else I read/skimmed, just going to say I am crazy about all of you (((((RADS BOARDIES))))
Update about my son/daughter-in-law/grandchild, the only thing we know definitively at this point is It's a GIRL! The penis they saw was obviously an arm or something..LOL. As for the Kell+ blood issue, still waiting on more news. DIL has to go to the doctor at least twice a week for a while and I know they will be monitoring the baby very closely in-utero for anemia and if the baby gets to a certain level, they will transfuse in utero! I am terrified of course but hopeful they know what they are doing.
OK, at work so gotta run. HUGS!
0 -
Josie...big supportive hugs headed your way!
I am alive and well, will write more as time permits. Getting ready for our yard sale this weekend. Lots of work, but I am really in the mood to get rid of stuff. Even books, which I have a bad habit or hanging onto. Not ones I love, but tons I haven't even read. No brainers mostly, a lot of true crime and mystery/suspense. Time to say goodbye to a ton, which leaves me with about another ton!
Thinking of each one of my special friends. Much love to all of you.
0 -
April, I m so glad mom and baby are doing ok.Thanks for the update.Thanks for the support also.
Janis thanks for the hugs!! Good luck on your sale.
OK so here's my update.My morning was busy but I kept trying to work on my benefits for the next day and finished but 1 done.My manager wanted to have that meeting this afternoon.But instead my office manger left early and my manager was busy with ultrasound s so she asked me if I could come in for about 3 hours Tommorow.I guess I'm getting up early and going to work.My son has a Psychiatrist appointment tommorow at 12:20 it's actually across the hallway from our office.So I'll be going in at 8am and working until 11:00 .Then I have to go home get my son and come back.Yay me! I thought they had all the days blocked off while I'm gone.But now they opened up those spots and They will be training someone else in the office to do bone densities while I'm gone.Probably my replacement.After hearing that I'm almost positive they may be getting ready to fire me.Bring it on folks!!! BTW I asked my manager what exactly she meant by being caught up for 1 week.She said not only benefits but going through provider lists adding on ect...Silly me That's pretty much impossible and They know it for 24 hours a week.
I am keeping a log of my phone calls to insurance companies and logging start time and finish time so I can prove how long sometimes I can be on the phone to insurance .I didn't sleep well last night but I'm not going to lose sleep over them tonight.
0 -
Josie - oh, what a day
sleep well and go in prepared...I pray there is a happy silver lining...in your pocket! Give your son a hug! Hope he is feeling better and his visits are helping him..gosh it's so hard to be a teen.(((Hugs)))
Cindy
0 -
Good for you Josie- you've lost enough sleep over them already. Good luck tomorrow. Hope your son's dr is helping him. Had to do the same thing when my youngest son was having issues; it really helped him and us - we were at w it's end!
Diane
0 -
Thanks Cindy and Diane.
Actually I'm not sure why we're still going to the psychiatrist still.All she does is ask how he's doing and talk to him a few minutes.It's only a 15 min appt.She really thinks he should be on meds but I don't.She wanted him in counseling but that didn't work out either.I hope he is getting the care he needs.I go upstairs and talk to him and ask him how he's feeling.He seems better than he was last summer.
Well I guess I'll get this 3 hours over with.Thanks again for the support.
0 -
Logging your phone time is brilliant, Josie, and the extra three hours is a positive sign. The new hire is sort of a creepy fly in the ointment. Not that the ointment is that attractive to begin with. At least the managers will be busy managing someone else for a while.
April, it sounds as though they are right on top of things and are taking super care of that baby. How on earth did they discover it to begin with?
Big D, keep hanging in there. Cindy's hubby too!
0 -
Brookside, April,BigD and Edwards - I agree the offer was crazy. Gigil had an idea that I should counter so I did at 80,000. I am sure he will be done once he sees that but at least he will know I am not trying to dump my home. Lansing was hit hard when General Motors went down several years ago and then the gov made us a right to work state and busted the unions. So homes have lost almost 1/2 the value but when I moved here in 04 it was at about 160,000 and not in great shape. I have done a lot to it but I know it will be a as is sale when it is all said and done. I do not have the energy or the funds to invest the other 20,000 it needs to bring it back to its original state. My parents just did not do what was needed to keep it up. If I had a hubby or boyfriend that liked to do that type of stuff it would be different but living alone and being disabled AND retired is too much for me.
Josie - Good grief!! I am so glad you are keeping records. I really can not add anything that has not been said but am offering my support to you. it has been a long hard road.
I sent Kate a card also. Lets hope she can get through this chemo and get back home.
Cindy I hope your hubby is doing ok. BigD hang in there.
0 -
Bunkie, I think you should consider reporting this guy to your State Dept of Aging (or whatever it is called). If he really would have given you $20,000 for your house, that is financial abuse, complicated by the fact that you are (I'm only guessing here) over 60. If you are under 60, there's probably another department, but whatever it is, they'd no doubt adore checking this guy's history.
0 -
Well no meeting again today.I came in did what I could and left.My son was sleeping when I got home.We got back in the car and went back to his Doctors office (right across from my office)Only to find out the DR wasn't in and she said someone from the office called and left a message they had to cancel.We never received a message.I was mad.
0 -
Bunkie- Tennessee where I live is a right to work state too and while we don't have a GM here it has had an impact on even non-union workers. As one attorney explained it to me..they can fire you if they don't like the color of your hair. Comforting. Btw is there no end to the recalls by GM?
Good move with the counter. At least now he knows its not a fire sale. I'm sure your parents did their best with keeping the house up. By the time my parents had theirs paid off they were relieved and not willing to invest more money in an aging house. It still looks good- one of my brothers got the house in the will- he was their primary caregiver. You will find a buyer who has a handyman for a husband or boyfriend. I am blessed to have one of those- my DH.
Diane
0 -
I'm in the last week of radiation, doing the "boost". I went through the same thing on the other side three years ago. This time fatigue set in earlier. I worked full time through both diagnoses, but I did start using the cream (Aquafor) daily when I started. The skin in general looks better this time. There are a couple of irritated places but a prescription cream (sulfa dine) has helped with that. For new folks, get rest when you can; it also helped if I went bra less after I returned from work until the next morning. Radiation is not an easy thing, but it can be manageable. Don't let anyone make you think that "there's nothing to it." Oh, be prepared to explain many times the difference between radiation and chemo. Good luck and hang in there!
0 -
Blessedteacher welcome! What a crummy break going through it all again on the other side. Did you get a lumpectomy this time? You certainly know what to do this time, don't you? Take care of yourself and rest a bunch while you hydrate.
Josie, what a pain! I was thinking maybe either Brookside or I could draft a letter for you to use to put your employer on notice that you are requesting an ADA mandated modification to your working conditions due to your recent breast cancer. In the letter you can offer to present medical documentation if they require that. That way you can put them on notice that you know your legal rights. If you would like that, PM one of us with your email address. Of course I can't speak for Brookside but she is very up to speed on all of this. I have done research too, and if you want, I would be glad to draft a letter that you can personalize and print. it is an option that might fet the ball rolling for you.
April thinking about and praying for your grandchild on the way, and your son.
BigD you are foremost on my mind too. Prayers for this situation just being a benign oddity.
Cindy please keep us posted on your DH.
And of course our Kate. Run, any updates?
Bunkie, good job on that counter offer!
0 -
Yes, Gigil and Josie. The ADA supercedes any right of the employer to fire you at will. Once you have invoked that protection, they need to work with you to establish a reasonable accomodation. I live in a employ-at-will, or whatever it is called, state, did not make my company's sales requirements last year, and am still here, on a 50% standard. If I had not exercised my rights under the ADA. I'd have been gone, gone, gone.
Now that someone else is coming to fill in on your off days, this is a perfect time to download those pesky telephone calls. Gigil, would you please draft that letter for Josie?
So glad you're nearing the end, BlessedTeacher. Bummer that it's the second time, but I guess it's a blessing that you know exactly (almost) what you are in for. i'm hoping you are the kind of teacher who has the summer off and will be able to make the best of that fatigue?
0 -
Good to hear from you, April, congrats on the little girl!! I will pray that they do not have to do the transfusion, but if it is necessary, she will be in good hands and well cared for.
Josie, still no meeting? I don't know what to make of that. As far as them letting you know they are training someone, I think that is even stranger. Where I work, the few times they have let someone go, the last thing they want to do is give them any indication that anything is out of the ordinary until the day they do it. I might almost think that was a good sign that they told you. Or maybe they are trying to intimidate you. I am so sorry you have to deal with people like that. I still love the idea of a log and if you can get help with that letter, wonderful. Get it ready. I wish I knew more about labor law, but I just do not. Keep us posted. I hope your son continues to do well and I agree with your opinion on medication. There is a time and a place for it, but I do not even like to take it and I think we over-medicate our children these days. Fix everything with a pill. How on earth did we all survive? Geeesh, we did not even have seatbelts back then.
Welcome BlessedTeacher and sorry you had to go through the rads twice. Glad you found our thread here.
Thanks everyone for your well wishes, means a lot. My forehead is a little sore now but only really when I press on the area. I got a call yesterday from my MO's nurse and she gave me the name of the neurosurgeon I am to meet with. I called but was told they will not make an appt. until they are faxed a referral and records, so I called the nurse back and left her that message. This was late in the afternoon, probably around 4:30. I was working late and did not notice I got another call until 5:15 and when I listened to the message it was my MO saying, "Joan, I have a plan. Call me." I thought what???? What plan? I thought the plan was for me to get a biopsy. So I called back but the office was closed so I left word with the answering service. Ten mins. later his nurse calls again and asks why I called, was I okay? She said she had faxed over the info necessary to the neuro doc, so I told her about the call from her boss and something about a plan. She had no idea what he was referring to. So at this point I said (and this will give you all an idea as to how strange my humor can be at times, both the nurse and MO are VERY conservative but nice people). I said "Please tell him tomorrow that I have a plan too. My plan is to remove the forehead completely, put in a metal plate with some twinkling colored lights in it, and make me look like Robocop, but prettier." She just laughed and said she would tell him. I have not heard back from him - LMAO.
I am exhausted, had a huge project to get out these last two days, so getting ready to have a nice dinner and go to bed early tonight. Love you all a ton!!
0 -
Thanks Gigil and Brookside.I will PM you my e-mail.I hope it helps.I almost feel like it may be too late. I hope not.
Funny thing is.I have just come to the realization that I don't think that it's me anymore.I really think that no one could find the time to do everything they are expecting me to do.I also made up a list of the tasks being asked of me to do daily.This is in addition to doing all the bone densities .
0 -
We had a family dinner Sunday night for Fathers day and my in laws 50 th anniversary.
The blond on the left front row is my oldest DD Sarah
0
