February 2012 Chemo
Comments
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Momof3 yay, glad you are done.
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momof3boys - yes, it occurred to me that I better report hair loss here, if I know whats good for me.
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Firstcall, I think your great! I love your sense of humor!
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Lumpynme - LMFAO, I shaved mine already so I wouldn't leave a trail behind me! I haven't laughed like that in a long time.
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I love the term, for loss of nether hair, the exploding bunny syndrome, so fun for something that IS funny if you date to think about it.
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Hello my friends,
This week has been so hard emotionally that except for my cold I'm glad I feel ok.
As you most know we lost our 3 1/2 yr old dog lat sat suddenly to what the vet can only guess was a heart attack. Today we had to put to sleep our 15 yr old cat who had developed cancer in her mouth. We had the mass removed but in less than a month it came back so fast she was unable to eat.
My poor husband has had to try to be the rock in everything and I think it's taken it's toll on him. How do you help the men in our lives who are coping with so much too? He doesn't talk to anyone like I do. And my kids... 6 and 9. So much to deal with at such a young age. I feel lost in my role as a mother and wife.. Please send extra prayers and hugs their way.
Wishing many sunbeams for you all.0 -
sissydi - i have compazine and zofran for nausea, although i was told to not take the zofran for the first three days after chemo.
ali68 -
hope your arm is feeling better.firstcall - I'm probably paraphrasing forrest gump here, but if you want to run, then run, and when you are done, then stop and go home!
jap62 - I am noticing slower hair growth on my legs. Also I have hardly needed to tweeze any stray hairs from my eye brows this week, and the few that I did tweeze, came out with the slightest tug.
I'm going to be really bummed when I lose my eyebrows.
lisak - have not had any symptoms of menopause, but I've only had one treatment. No one told me that might happen, either...
dltnhm - holy cow! thanks for putting together that list! that's awesome! boy we have a big group. My treatment is TCH and I started 2/13.
katopet - sorry about your hair...and it is colder with no hair!!! weird!
myleftboob - hello furby!
lumpynme - lol @ your exploding bunny!
JenH13 - I know, I worry about my husband too. His sister passed away last April, both of his parents have had major health issues this fall/winter and his mother just had to move into a nursing home. What can you do? I just try to not ask for more than I really need, and on my good days, try to focus on all we are blessed with so he remembers too. He has had some rough days through this...but somehow we are getting through. It's a legit concern though, this kind of stress can make or break a marriage.
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Arrgggg!!!! I had nearly 4 paragraphs written and my daughter just hit something on the keyboard and it all went bye bye. So I start again and because it's late I hope I capture it all again!
So, it's been over a week since I last posted and I haven't been able to follow the site much since that time so I've skimmed about pages - a lot has been happening since I last checked in. Well, I had tx#2 last week Thursday (2/23) and all went fine. I have to say that this round has been much better than #1. Ali, I read that you're have a sore arm from you txs - my arm was terribly sore after #1 and there was no way it was going to last thru 5 more treatments so I had a port put it. This made it sooooo much better; like the others, I really encourage you to get one. Anyway, I was tired out and queasy for the rst of the day and on Friday as well, but nothing too terrible. The first time, Saturday was just plain awful but this time around, while worse than the other 2 days, my symptoms were extreme tiredness, no appetite, and some nausea; it wasn't great but it wasn't too bad. While the first time, I felt crummy for a week with stomach discomfort, fatigue, a headache, temperature swings, sensitive mouth and funny taste in my mouth, I only had mild nausea and slight fatigue this time. I feel rather guilty for having gotten off so easy this time compared with what so many of you are going through - SORRY!
But, it wasn't all rosy. I caught some kind of bug right before this tx which turned into a nasty cough which is still lingering today - its prevented me from sleeping well for the last week and a half. Also, because I had been feeling so good, I failed to monitor my BMs. (TMI alert!). So, on Tuesday, as I was leaving work, I felt I had to go but couldn't and that's when I realized I hadn't had a BM since last Friday. I drank some Smooth Move tea that night at it started to kick in at 4:00am. I tell you, the next 2 hours were some of the worst hours of my life - while my body wanted to pass something, I was so backed up that it wouldn't come out. I had horrible abdominal cramps and even broke out into a cold sweat - it felt like I was birthing another child!! At around 6:00, I finally was able to pass something - what a relief. Then 1/2 later I went running back to the bathroom with diarrhea. It was NOT a pleasant morning! Note to self - start drinking the tea daily starting night of tx!
Regarding hair - mine is pretty much all gone now. It starting coming out day 16 post tx#1. It seemed like a lot to me, but I also had a lot of hair to start with so no one noticed it was coming out. But, last week Wednesday (2/22), i woke up with that tingly/prickly acalp feeling and knew it was going tonbe the big day and sure enough, when i got int the shower and ran my hands over my head, they came back covered with hair. So, i just rubbed my scalp until most of it came out. I did do the preemptive haircut the week before- cut my longish curly locks really short so it wouldn't be soo traumatic and it turned out to be the right thing to do. I cried the whole day before the cut and a little bit during the cut, but I didn't shed a single tear when I was rubbing it out last week! But, there were still some patches hanging in there so it looked rather hideous. My kids' reactions were interesting - my 11yo daughter really wanted to see it and then said I looked like a burn victim; my 9yo son was initially shocked when he saw it (I really didn't want him to see it because I thought he might react this way) but, he composed himself quickly and then said I looked like a zombie!. I finally had a friend come by on Sunday to buzz the rest of it off - I still have some fuzz which irritates my scalp so I now just hope it all falls out soon. The hair in the nether regions actually did come out first though there are still stragglers there too. I shaved my pits several weeks ago and it never grew back! Now just waiting for the leg hair to go.
MSbelle (I think that's your handle), first, welcome to the board (and all the other newbies too!). Second, I have TEs too and have faced the same issues you have. When I had them filled the second time it was excruciatingly painful - I had been off my pain meds from the surgery but that procedure sent me back to them. One of the things I realized one night where I couldn't sleep b/c of the pain was that my chest muscles were actually trying to push them off - they were contracting so hard in the process that it was causing the pain. After about a week, the muscles finally accepted the awful things and the pain stopped. I did go thru PT, partly because I had cording but also to stretch out the chest and arms muscles. They gave me great exercises to do and now the tightness has gone away and I have full range of motion in both arms.
Well, I'm tuckered out now that I had to write everything all over again. I had wanted to address some of the other posts but gotta get some sleep now (even though I'm still coughing!). I hope this of you who are having a rough go of it feel better soon and those facing their next txs will have the good fortune I did this round and have very minimal SEs. Night, night!0 -
Oh yeah, another thing before I sign off. I have decided not to do wigs and instead just wear scarfs and caps. Everyone at work has been so nice, telling me how good I look, though one idiot told me I look like a pirate! People who didn't know I had BC have been questioning my "new look" so I have had to tell a lot more people, but they're all still great and tell me I look good. At home, I just go free and my wonderful son actually told me he likes how I look now - he also loves to rub my head.
On that lovely note, I now go pleasantly into dreamland (hopefully!).0 -
Good Morning!
I'm at the end of week 2 after TX 2. I feel pretty good, tired, taste is way off, hands and feet have pins and needles sometimes painful, but not too bad considering. I still have hair on my head although it is very thin. Armpit hair is gone, rest of body hair is thinning. I wear a hat or scarf to keep the shedding from being everywhere. Especially when cooking because who wants hair in their food? Also, I need to get some more of those sticky lint rollers. I use them to roller shoulders and hats and pillowcases!
Looking forward to next week as last time the 3rd week I felt good and food tasted almost normal.
I've been keeping a small spiral notebook journal of what I'm feeling each day. I find this helps me to know what to expect when. I know not to plan anything on days 3-10 after TX.
My sister was over yesterday trying to talk me into going to a St. Patricks day party. I told her I'm out as my next tx is 3/12 and that I would be on one of my not so good days. She said maybe I'd feel good and feel like a beer or 2. I said don't count on it, I know I won't be good that day and I really don''t feel like drinking anything now. She looked like she might cry. I know she meant well (she's a sweetie), but its not that big of a deal to miss a party right now! I'm not sure why people feel so bad about me being off the party circuit or missing events for a while. It doesn't bother me, I'm too tired anyways!
Judy
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Oy, i just lost a long post.
doing better, around supportive friends, and my liver numbers went down yet again (yeah!)
jen, so sorry about your losses. very sad.
galena, did you just finish chemo? good for you.
firstcall, too funny. my hair is coming out in bits. i wish it would all go, but patience is my friend. my sister sent me a wig. i bought a wig from one of those specialty shops for mucho bucks (insurance will hopefully cover). the wig meg sent was just as good. there's a site called paulayoung.com that someone recommended. good wigs for cheap.
hope all are well. i just had chemo yesterday so here come more se's. price i pay to live. woot woot!
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Good Morning everyone. day 14.....
I'm going for a long run. the YMCA is hosting a run today, Its a 5 mile loop, and you can run as many as you are able. I havent done a long run since I was diagnosed, so here goes. I have exercised regularly, mostly at the gym because of the cold weather, but its time to hit the trail. Will likely be rainy. I finally learned how to predict the weather in Seattle. If you can see Mt Rainier,it means its going to rain. If you can't see Mt Rainier, it means its raining! But, you can only get so wet. Next treatment is Friday.
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Everyone. I was out most of the day yesterdayso I read all your posts and edits and updates but I have not had the chance to make the corrections and additions yet. I need to do it on our real computer however because trying to edit with an iPad is very difficult on this forum. No prob. Hope to update this weekend.
Lumpynme. Omg you had me with tears in my eyes over the exploding bunny. In fact I believe I have to have an exploding bunny tshirt. No graphic graphic but it will be a private joke that I can wear and whoever else also. I'm going to work on that shirt and let you guys have the link when I'm done! Hilarious visual in the stall!!!
Gritgirl, Wahoo. Yahoo. I am dancing for you. So excited a out the liver numbers going down. You are going to astound all your doctors!
Firstcall. You better run. LOL about the weather predicting in Seattle! I am considering a run in the snow right now.
Momof3boys. Congratulations on your last chemo! Yahoo for you. My prayer is that your hair grows back quickly on your head because you are so ready for that. Did I e ER tell you I have "my three sons"? They are 21, 19, and 18 !!!! Love my boys!!!!!
Ymac16. I read your posts and feel like I am right in the room with you with your children, with your coworkers, looking in the mirror. Your family is great but I ESPECIALLY LOVEyour son! Zombies? Priceless! Maybe you should take a pic of Johnny Depp to that one coworker ;-)
Christina0001, I, too, am going to be bummed about the eyebrows and eyelashes. It is going to be hard. Haven't lost my hair but I know it is getting to that point. I'm just 10 days post tx #1. I think I will do the eyebrow stencil thi gy but I think I will create emoticon eyebrows so I can look like the little smileys with all the different expressions LOL.
Hair. Have lots of hats, one scarf, going to order a henna tattoo kit, the wig has been ordered by ACS, so I might actually be prepared in the stuff dept although the wig will be a close call if it arrives.
Decided I would like to cut my hair in different styles shorter and shorter so that I can take pics and see myself with shorter and shorter hair. I haven't had short short hair since I was toddler growing hair but I'd like to see a Mia Farrow me before the hair loss so I can picture what it will be like when it finally grows back. Of course I have curly hair so it will be more a very short Annie like Mia. ;-) Whoknows maybe I will get post chemo straight hair.
Tears and crying and probably sobbing are all in my future regarding the hair at least for one good cry. What can I say. I am a hair girl
But .... Came home yesterday and my dear husband had gone to the barber and had his hair taken down to razor #1.5. That's not 1.5" because he's been balding our whole 25 years and keeps it short, but now he is almost bald after yesterday. I asked him "what did you do?" ans he said he got a haircut and I rubbed His head and said "you did this for me?" and he had tears in his eyes and said "yeah".
I LOVE THIS MAN!
And I love you all, go search for a rainbow today. There is one out there for each of you. It's a promise!!!
Diana0 -
I sure do find comfort in reading all of your post. What a great site this is! Makes it easier to cope and you really do feel like you are not alone! Thanks to you all!! Will be praying for all and can't wait to say in year from now " we made it "
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Hi everyone, spent all day at hospital and a male nurse said I need to take blood. I said have you seen my arm? He said I need too, I said no bloody way are you touching my arm. I got up and said I'm finding my doctor. My doctor is gr8 and she was omg Alison your arm is so bad. I can't move it, lift it or sleep with it. The pain is so bad the doc said I needed more pain meds. It is so bad they have Taken pics for teaching as it hasn't happened in ten years. So now I will be able to get a line in or port. When doc was arranging it, it took so long because they don't use them very often. I now have to have tests and body washes, nose wash to make sure I don't have MRSA. So two week times more blood tests before it can be done and it's happening the day before my new chemo.
My doc said when you have it done make sure you get someone who does these all the time, now I'm shitting myself. So new line, new chemo, cold cap, bad arm, piles and thrush.
I want my old life back.0 -
Oh Ali- that is a BAD day.... Sending you hugs!
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Ali, are they putting a port in. How horrible about the arm. I had my stuff done under conscious sedation. That was a huge help.
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Ali, ((((((hugs))))))). Regarding the port, they are really doing overkill on the germ thing, but then again, I was cleared before surgery because of a previous infection and test, so maybe not exactly overkill, LOL. But I think you will be grateful for the port when you finally get it done. Your ARM will thank you. We will pray all goes as planned!
Msbelle, from your mouth to Gods ears,
next year.
Gritgirl, yay, I like good numbers! (Getting to know the meaning of FAR too many, though!) LOL
Diana, lovely story, wonderful man!0 -
First call, run,run,run
Jen, sorry about your furbaby. Ymac, love the zombie remark. To everyone else, sorry I can't adtess you all personly, bit my phone is dying, still on hospital and will be at least tomorrow too, maybe longer. Got to charge the phone up again. Much love to all and small SEs0 -
Moonflwer
Hope your stay isn't too too long. Wishing you a speedy recovery and at least you'll be well looked after. You've had such a hard time with so many SE's (((Hugs)))
gritgirl
So glad about the liver numbers!!!
Ali
Your poor arm!! You will be glad you got the port though. While I hate the lump sticking out of my chest, it will save you alot of grief in the long run. I've never had issues my whole life with needles but now that I only have one good arm I'm glad I did it. One of the doctors (can't remember which, there are so many) told me that chemo narrows the viens which is why they totally recommend it here in Canada anyway. I think I said it before I was surprised that they don't in the UK seeing that there are so many similarites having universal health care. Really surprised me. BTW I'm no doctor but is there not another way to take blood, like from the foot or something???
dltnhm
You've got a good man there!! I'm a hair girl too! I was out with the girls last night and one of them cracked me up when she said she could see that my hair looked thinner and how now my hair looked like hers LOL!! She has naturally thin hair. Mine is normally quite robust, not super thick but its the thing I get compliments on. Coming out big time now which is dreadful but nothing I can do about it so must suck it up and put on my big girl panties right?
JudyP
I always go out and enjoy St. Paddy's day celebrations but will pass this year too. What a drag seeing its on a Saturday night this year. I'll just be a week out from my 2nd TX and highly doubt I'll feel like partying. With that being said whilst out with the girls last night I had 2 glasses of wine. Man that tasted good!!! Had a sip last week visiting a friend and it tasted like crap.
Ymac
Your kids sound amazing, real troopers. I had to laugh at the text being erased because I've done it myself.
JenH
I'm so sorry about your cat. What a blow. I know its hard for the hubby's. Their bound to crack under all of this. I know mine kind of goes off at stupid little things so I just let him vent. I know it's not about the issue at hand but that's how he rolls. He works the midnight shift and has been working everyday renovating the basement. On Fridays I insist he do nothing but get some sleep when he gets off and goes out with a couple of buddies for a few beers and a poker game or some pool or whatever. He's home by 7 or 8 gets a good night sleep then has the rest of the weekend for stuff around the house. He needs it and I don't mind a bit. Gives me some alone time too or a chance to get together with GF's. Works for us!
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ymac - your post makes me feel a little less fearful of treatment #2
lol @ firstcall and weather predicting
Diana - your husband is awesome!
love the emoticon eyebrow idea ali - oh you poor thing, that's just awful. hang in there...somehow we will get through this and it will just be a memory
Trying to get motivated to clean the house today! I want it CLEAN before treatment #2 on Monday.
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Run report.....well I did get out there. I wasnt sure how far I would make it, but I managed to get in 16 miles on these chemo legs. I was tempted to go further, but decided not to push my luck. As I was getting ready this morning, I had a hard time figuring out if I had shaved yet. Thats never been a problem before.
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((((((Ali)))))))) hugs to you girl. You will be very happy with a port. I'm praying that arm heals up sooner than later!
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Ali- I am sooo sorry you have to go through everything with your arm. You will love the port! I had mine put in under what they call "twilight sedation" I felt like i was awake the whole time but I dont remember them doing the surgery. took me about 3 days to get used to this bump in my skin but then its been a piece of cake.
Firstcall- I am so impressed.. I couldnt run 16 miles BEFORE I had chemo let alone now. Good for you!!
Christina- I dont know if it helps or not but my 2nd TX was easier than the first. I seemed to rebound quicker, had about 3 icky days and now I am feeling pretty good and I am 9 days out. I knew what to expect and what to do to help what was coming. Claritan, immodiam ad, and I ate whatever sounded good(which wasnt much) I hope yours goes just as easy!
Ymac- I think your son and mine would get along! My son is only 6 and very curious what my head is going to look like since ive told them i will be bald. Its thinning a lot now so i started wearing hats and scarves and he keeps asking me to take them off so he can see if i am yet. Doesnt work THAT fast kiddo. The zombie comment reminded me of something he asked me a few months ago that had me cracking up. I apologize ahead of time if this offends anyone but its really just a curious 6 yr old boy trying to understand things.
He said mommy, Jesus died for us right? I said yes. He said and then he was buried and rose from the dead right? I said yes. He said so.. would that make him a vampire, zombie or a ghost? I wasnt really too sure how to answer it at first i was trying not to laugh to hard. The minds of kids!
Thank you all for your thoughts. I feel better today
I hope everyone is feeling better than yesterday, more sunbeams than the day before, and much love and support that all our family here can give!!0 -
Jen, well , which is it? Is he a ghost, vampire or zombie, inquiring minds want to know!!! LOL.
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Hi all, sorry I haven't checked in for a few days. Side effects were sucky for a few days. First there was a combo of nausea and constipation. My gastric system seemed to rebound after that, and give me a couple days of diarrhoea. Le sigh. I've also had some dry mouth / mouth ulcers, and dry eyes. Now I am feeling well.
Except that my skin has gone really acne-prone, but I'm not too bothered about that. My hair is still holding on strong, but it's only the end of Day 7 now.So many new posts to read! I'll reply to just a few...
Ali- Your poor arm! (((((hugs))))) Time for you to get uppity methinks! They need to take better care of you!
firstcall- Well done! I haven't felt like doing any decent exercise since starting chemo last week. I was feeling quite good today though, so tomorrow will hopefully be a new start.
gritgirl- Nah, haven't finished chemo... oh I wish! I had my first treatment last Monday. Only... 25 more weeks to go...
My next (Doxorubicin/Cyclophosphamide) is booked for the 19th of March.Everyone else- I hope your week has been okay, and that your side effects aren't too bad.
I'll try to read / reply better next week.0 -
ali68 - Of course you want your old life back. You are going through a really traumatic time with this right now ali. I am so sorry about the arm and that it has gotten worse, but incredibly thankful that you are getting the port and that you have a doctor on your side, and that you stood up to that nurse and didn't let him get your arm and make it worse!!!! Are you getting the port in your chest? That's where mine is and it really is a lifesaver. See if you can get a Power Port and even see if you can get a Slim one. Power Port is a brand name .. Google it and take a look. It is incredibly small but powerful and will save you in many, many ways. ASK ASK ASK....
firstcall - YAY YAY YAY for your run!!! 16 miles!!! You are a wild man ;-) That's not just a LONG run ... that's a training run my friend. I had to smile about the shaving comment. Ron always has a 5 o'clock shadow at 10 am, so the idea that you had to wonder if you'd shaved ... I had completely forgotten about your facial hair. (Sorry about being insensitive and forgetting that you would have other hair issues than me and the girls.)
JenH13... OMG that is priceless!!! I have to copy and share it with friends!! You have to give me permission. I promise that is Reader's Digest worthy for one of the sections!!! You might get some cash if you submit it. Do it right away :-)
christina0001 - I feel your desire for motivation to clean. I hardly ever have motivation to clean ... but thankfully right now it's actually there in order to keep germs at bay and also to bless my family in a way I've been shirking all these years (and me a sahm ... simply no excuses)
myleftboob -- I was LOL at your "suck it up and put on my big girl panties right" line ... because I kept visualizing the EXPLODING BUNNY syndrome and then the need for some extra vacuuming with all the hair we are shedding .... YOU crack me up. By the way ... I have been meaning to ask ... are you myleftboob because that's the one you had removed or because that's the one that didn't have cancer ... or an entirely different reason all together? I LOVE your 'handle' :-)
EVERYONE ... I hope you had the most incredible of days yesterday and found your rainbows!
Today I want you to LISTEN for the sounds of life .... laughter, giggling, even sobbing, birds singing, winds blowing, chimes, bells, whispers, heater fan kicking on, garage doors opening, hymns or songs being sung, music, music, and more music (turn on the radio, stereo, iPad, music on demand on the television) ... dogs barking, cats mewing....and the sound of your own breathing as you inhale and exhale (you don't even have to breathe differently ...
"JUST BREATHE"!!!
Love to you all!!
Diana
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Galena, You sound just like me after my first treatment! But around day 7.. is when I started to get better. each day was a little bit better than the last so I hope that holds true for you! Im sorry you have to go through it at all though.
Diana of course you can share it. It's too funny not to! and I forget what his father ended up saying it was.. he said jesus wasnt really any of them but it would have to be closest to a ghost but really this is how it kind of is...... At least my son didnt through in alien or ninja his other creatures he talks about! I love the way your mind works with the LISTEN. Right now even though its chillly outside and we are still getting over those terrible storms that went through. I hear birds outside my window singing (and the hum of the computers) singing birds = spring right? even though it was snowing yesterday?
Emily Dickinson
Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul. And sings the tune without the words, and never stops at all.Many sunbeams to you all!
hugs!!
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Hair, hair go away. Come back more beautiful and luxurious. Oh, well. A watched head never balsamic. I got 2 more months so it'll happen. Should I start wearing depends to prep for the bunny explosion?
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dltnhm
The left is the one that's gone. Since it was the one that was always the topic of conversation since October 18 (the day of the routine mammogram) and the fact everyone was asking which one, it just kind of stuck. Speaking of cleaning, honestly I don't think my house has been as well tended to ever LOL! Between the need to be busy waiting on test results and surgery AND preparing for chemo plus being a bit bored. Once this next round is done though my next task is organizing taxes YUK!! A task I hate, I really would rather clean LOL! Love the reminder to breathe, so true.
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