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  • shells43
    shells43 Member Posts: 499
    edited February 2012
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    Ok, Windlass, now it is on. I just found "adult" candy molds online (for bachelor/bachelorette parties, it says).  I will refrain from posting the pics...
  • Denise2730
    Denise2730 Member Posts: 320
    edited February 2012
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    Don't refrain!

  • shells43
    shells43 Member Posts: 499
    edited February 2012
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    First, I want to apologize to CancerKicker for hijacking her post. I do hope that some of the information has been helpful, it was a serious post, and I think we all understand the frustrations (sexual and otherwise) that come with this diagnosis. I hope the other discussions have at least given you a laugh!

    Just do a search on "adult candy molds". There are also erotic ice trays which actually look better at nawtythings.com, and getsuckered.com is having a sale on....wait for it....cocoa butter!!!

  • suz45
    suz45 Member Posts: 85
    edited February 2012
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    Shelleyj43 - I had a look and it is colored cocoa butters that are on sale, so Im thinking there would be food coloring in it?? Hmmm yellow (sounds scarey) blue (blue kitty sounds bad) red (something we havent seen in a while)..lol. Where would I find just plain old cocoa butter... dont think Ive seen it in the grocery store and I dont get out much (besides Costco) Would I need to go to a specialty type store.

    Hugs Suz

  • Denise2730
    Denise2730 Member Posts: 320
    edited February 2012
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    I found cocoa butter at my local pharmacy. The only problem with it is everytime I use it I start craving chocolate.

  • Gingerbrew
    Gingerbrew Member Posts: 1,997
    edited February 2012
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    This may have been addressed already.  Effexor will stop your ability to have orgasm. I was previously on 225 mg and had no libido at all.  Previousy if I had nothing going on while awake I would have orgasm happen in my sleep, but not with Effexor. I am on 150 mg of Effexor now and all remains quiet.

    Perhaps you need a change of antidepressant to one less likely to interfere. 

    Good luck to you

  • suz45
    suz45 Member Posts: 85
    edited February 2012
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    To follow Gingers post... Gabbapentin definately affects the libido. Ive now gone 3 days without it and things are definately looking better. Just about fried my awsome lil "wii vibe" the other day. This toy hasnt let me down yet so I was shocked when I actually overheated it. Wasnt sure if the gabba was helping anyway with HFS and night sweats.

    Hugs Suz

  • JulieLynn
    JulieLynn Member Posts: 86
    edited February 2012
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    Thank you for such a great thread! Completely understand but I've also been LMBO at some of the posts! So nice to be so upfront about the crappy BC SEs, especially this one, but still able to laugh at the same time!

  • flannelette
    flannelette Member Posts: 398
    edited February 2012
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    Have just been having a great time on saturday night reading all these posts while my DH is asleep upstairs (he went to bed at 7) and as usual Apple you are honest to the core and very funny. 360? huh? surely you meant , say, 36, tops? I think you were pulling our legs...

    As for me, a while back my DH and I were being interviewed by a nurse for a program my DH is enroling in. She asked us kindly about our sex life and I said well, I'm dry as a bone cause of arimidex, and he can't get it up because of Cymbalta, and then I nearly fell off the chair laughing.

    The good thing is - we LOVE each other!

  • Myleftboob
    Myleftboob Member Posts: 983
    edited February 2012
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    Oh flanellette

    You just made my night!  LOL!! I love this thread and although I'm a newbie and only about to start my infusions this week, I am interested in keep "this" part of my life a little interesting.

  • windlass
    windlass Member Posts: 1,813
    edited February 2012
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    Where to get cocoa butter:

    I bought it at the local health food store in the skin care aisle. You can get it at Whole Foods, too. It comes in a squat, low, cylindrical white plastic jar. I can look up the brand if you'd like. I am betting you could also buy it at Michaels or another craft store, in the cake and cookie/chocolate molds section, since it's a common candy ingredient.

  • suz45
    suz45 Member Posts: 85
    edited February 2012
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    Great! I have a Micheals just a few blocks away.. will stop by tomorrow to see what they have. Thank you Windlass :)

    Hugs Suz

  • exbrnxgrl
    exbrnxgrl Member Posts: 4,858
    edited February 2012
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    Effexor may, not will, effect some women's ability to have an orgasm. It has not effected me in that way at all but is worth thinking about if you are taking it and having problems.

    Caryn

  • Anko66
    Anko66 Member Posts: 30
    edited February 2012
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    When Apple mentioned 360, I thought she meant 360 degrees, as in a super fabby sex move on the part of her husband (honestly!).

  • apple
    apple Member Posts: 1,466
    edited February 2012
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    sadly 360 is a correct number.  I always count.  I always have and I try to guess ahead of time how long our sex session will take and select a musical piece I am working on and try to have the ending of both happen at the same time.. It's the only way i can even participate in sexual activity without lying there like a dead fish.  i try.  my hubby is worth it.

    I hope this thread has been helpful cancerkicker.. I don't know that levity is appropriate when you've posted such a serious and heartfelt request for help.  i think talking about this sort of thing is good.

  • debstar
    debstar Member Posts: 2
    edited February 2012
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    Cancerkicker - I told my onc. I cannot climax and I to have no drive, she sent me to a sex therapist (I am being treated at Sloan Kettering) at my cancer hospital, I only went once so far nothing yet but I refuse to give up I actually miss it but mostly its for my husband. Maybe they have something like that where you are being treated? If not maybe the scream cream will work, I guess its worth a try. I am going to ask about it at my next appt. Good luck to you. Debbie

  • tenaj
    tenaj Member Posts: 365
    edited February 2012
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    Scream cream does help!!! Also been using olive oil, now switched to coconut oil.

  • windlass
    windlass Member Posts: 1,813
    edited February 2012
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    And I should clarify that cocoa butter does not take the place of lubricant. You will still need Replens when the moment arises.

  • jap62
    jap62 Member Posts: 993
    edited February 2012
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    thanks for the info windlass

  • windlass
    windlass Member Posts: 1,813
    edited February 2012
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    Shelley: Talk about making a sailor blush! I could barely even look at those adult candy molds. Do people really make those candies and EAT them?  Egads. I'd totally lose my appetite with one glance at those bulging veins. (Sorry to be so graphic.)

    jap62: I hope the advice helps.

    I think we BC ladies could use a bit of help in the Valentine's Day arena. It sounds like we all have great husbands, and just wish we could be more, um, responsive as loving wives.

    Good luck to us all!

  • suz45
    suz45 Member Posts: 85
    edited February 2012
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    Ahhh Apple, I can see it now.... counting instead of playing. Really wouldnt know how many? Do you count both the downstroke & the up stroke or is that considered one. (gotta get an accurate #)

    Hugs Dear Buddies, Suz

  • apple
    apple Member Posts: 1,466
    edited February 2012
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    just the downstroke.. otherwise the breaking point would be 720 and the beat would be too fast to play songs along in my head. (playing in quarter notes).

  • windlass
    windlass Member Posts: 1,813
    edited February 2012
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    Anko66: I just read your post about Apple's 360-degree husband. Ohmigoodness that is so funny!

    (Though definitely not fun for you either way, poor Apple!)

  • windlass
    windlass Member Posts: 1,813
    edited February 2012
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    Oh - Apple, now I get what you meant about "music you're working on." So your husband is like a living metronome of sorts. I dont know whether to laugh or cry with you on that one!

  • apple
    apple Member Posts: 1,466
    edited February 2012
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    i don't like waste time.. i'm just practicing while time is passing. 

    It's a good thing we get along.  He's a German/Norwegian combo if anyone is thinking about mating for life and considering genetic stock to invest in.

  • windlass
    windlass Member Posts: 1,813
    edited February 2012
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    We really need to make sure husbands never, ever read this board unless we allow them to or ask them to! *laugh* BCO needs to add the ability to create a private thread with gender password questions required to read "certain" things.

    I was just goofing around this morning and came up with 20 questions most women could answer, but few men could. (If you can't answer at least a few of these, you're probably a guy.)

    Here are the first few:

    • What is Summer's Eve and where would you purchase it?
    • What other product does cheap Cover Girl makeup smell like?
    • What might a young girl recite while twisting the stem off of an apple?
    • How does a woman wear "Candies" and what are they? (Hint: They're not edible).
    • What can you put on pantyhose in a pinch to stop them from running further?


    Then I was having so much fun, I decided to make it a new thread, in honor of this one. Here is the link:

    "Girlie Secrets" - Questions only Women Can Answer
    http://community.breastcancer.org/forum/31/topic/782600

  • chele
    chele Member Posts: 132
    edited February 2012
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    OMG!  I must be a guy!  I couldn't answer all the questions!  Must have happened when I cut my boobs off.

  • jstunme
    jstunme Member Posts: 11
    edited February 2012
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    Windlass .... While I understand what you said .... I disagree .... I love that some husbands have responded on here.  There have been a couple men who placed EXcellent responses here ... 'bout made me cry when I read them.  Thanks guys 

  • windlass
    windlass Member Posts: 1,813
    edited February 2012
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    Chele: It's less about answering them all and more about knowing the answers to any of them. Hopefully a guy couldn't answer any of them -- unless he was in the fashion business.

    My goal is to refine the list to where women can answer close to 100% of the questions and men can't answer any.

    If you get a moment, could you go to the thread and post which ones did you not know the answers to so I can revise them?

  • BelaT
    BelaT Member Posts: 44
    edited February 2012
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    Haven't started my hormones yet but I guess this is what is going to happen. I was never into it any how , I will have an excuse now.