2013 Survivors!!!
Comments
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Sweggee... That feeling is really normal. I finished chemo in November and actually still have some of that. Hard to get motivated. No energy. Just kind of blah. I mentioned it to my mo at a followup last month and she said every one of her patients after treatment tells her the same thing. It's kind of like when you are going they treatment you are actively fighting it and giving it all your energy to get thru and see the end. But when we r done what are we doing to fight it? Even with the hormone therapy (I don't even have that cause I am triple negative) you are not seeing drs and going to treatment so frequently. It's hard to get passed it. But with time it gets easier. I see that I am better now than I was three months ago but still not as I wish I were but getting there. Hang in and let yourself have those bad days but then get back up and try to live your life :-). As time goes on there will be days you don't think about BC. Hard to believe but true!
Hugs
Melissa0 -
Hi ladies i need some advice/ as some may remember a few months back i looked into opening a healthy cafe. I was unlucky wit the premises and couldnt justify spending all our savings as the location wasnt great! Fastforward to now and my dh and 15 year old have given their blessing for me to try again as i hate my job and the way i am not in control of when i can be available to my kids due to the distance i have to travel! Now my problem is am i being really selfish to want to use all our safety net on my dream! Dh is going to cancel our new car tomoro......as i am gonna need every penny! What do u think? I am interested on independent views. Thanks
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Fellow Warriors,
Most of my hair fell out about a week ago and today my Sis helped me shave the rest off so I look like I have stubble. Now my scalp feels very itchy. Two questions: #1 - How do I get my scalp to look very smooth (no stubble) like a Baby's botttom? #2 - What will help this itchy feeling go away?
Thanks in advance. I hope everyone has a terrific week. Peace!
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cmbernardi, I've read of people using sticky tape/duct tape to get the stubble out. I didn't do it, and just let it fall out by itself. As far as the itchy scalp, mine stopped itching when the hair was shaved, so hopefully in a day or to that may go away by itself. Sleeping on a satin pillowcase is also recommended to minimize friction. I bought cheap synthetic satin and made two pillowcases. It really feels way more comfortable to lay your head on the smooth fabric. Hope that helps!
Swgwee, so sorry to hear you are feeling like this, but most of us experience something similar. Finishing treatment is a little bit like a dog chasing a car, he catches the car, and then does not know what to do with it. While we're in treatment, we are being taken care of by a medical team for months and months, and we are fighting so hard to beat this thing. Then all of a sudden it is over, we don't see our docs/nurses regularly anymore, we are 'set adrift' so to speak, and are expected to just get on with life on our own. Easier said than done! Bc is a lifechanging experience, and quite a lot of women suffer from PTSD afterwards. As time goes by, as our hair grows again, as we get physically stronger, as we begin to do the normal everyday things again, and as we begin to get past the 'cancer patient' mindset, we gradually get better. But this does not happen overnight. After treatment was over, I felt 'at sea' for a month or two, almost as if I was looking in to 'normal life' from outside, as if I was not part of it at all. It felt weird and upsetting. Then I made a deliberate decision that I did not want to feel like or wanted to be seen as a bc patient anymore. I started to go back to my normal activities that I did before cancer, started exercising to get stronger, and told myself that this cancer chapter was behind me. I stopped talking about it so much, then thought about it less and less. Other normal things started taking the place of bc which had consumed my life for nine months. For me it was a question of consciously behaving, acting and living as before cancer, and it worked for me. Hope this makes some sense to you!
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Cmbernrdi. I bought a lint roller as recommended by many on this site. I really hated that part for some reason; a few days with the rest of the hair falling out in the shower but then it got easy! Someone made a comment about how much easier it was after surgery with no hair to wash when no showers allowed. That was true. One of the pluses against the many minuses!
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Ireland - do you have a business plan? Has your guts kept telling you to do this? Is it something you love? Then I say what the hell take a chance! If it is your heart and guts tugging at you then it will be ok
scary but people do it all the time. Just make sure you get a lot of input to make the correct decisions. Like will you be able to work all those hours and love it? Do you understand the business side of it finanicially what is your goal for your business.
I am thinking about the same kind of thing and I am doing a lot of research so go for it!
You can't do anything with out risk but that is life! Without people taking risk where would we be:)0 -
Thanks for your input Melissa and liefie! I guess this too, shall pass! They just give you so much information when you're going through treatment, but no one said 'Oh, by the way, you may crash and burn after treatment, but don't worry, it's normal!' I just hope it's short lived . ((Hugs))
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Swgee- welcome! I hope you find our group entertaining and helpful as much as i do.
Believe- Love all my Vit F's too. thank you for that. Good luck tomorrow and let me know how it goes.
mcook- when did you say you were going to be in the Dallas area?
Cmbernardi- I am so sorry that you have lost your hair. I did not have to have chemo, but my hair is thinning from the Letrozole. That sucks!
Scottie, Tazzy, Ramols- Where are you?
Ireland- if it's something you can afford to do, DO IT! But make sure that you and your family are financially able to do it. I'm not a risk taker by any means. I'm a firm believer in going with your gut. If it feels bad in your gut- abort ASAP.
Aruba,Juneau,Joanne-I hope you all are still enjoying your vacations.
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Ireland - such a big decision. I too would follow my heart but then my head confuses me. The best advise I was ever given about BIG decisions is, which choice will you be happiest with in 5 years? I hope that helps. I know you and your family will make the best decision for you.
Swgee - I know the deserted feeling after all the running around we do during active treatment. I'm actually glad that part is over and that I am able to resume a normal life. I'm hoping that happens for you too, the sooner the better of
course.
Mcook - congrats on reading a book you really enjoyed. During my treatment stage, I read (audio, versions) of all Janet Evanovich - Stephanie Plum books. 19 books all together. I recommend them, so entertaining - laugh out loud funny! Haven't read anything else since ... A good book is a great companion.
Shari - you might try the books I just mentioned, while you wait. The books take place in New Jersey and the main character is about your age, I'm fact, she's the same age for all 19 books. It would be nice to never age.
Momof3: congratulations to your daughter, that's quite an accomplishment. I'm certain you are exceptionally proud. How old is she.
Cmbernardi - I didn't have chemo but satin pillow cases sound like a great idea. You are making good strides in this journey that no one wants to take.
Responding on my iPhone is challenging at best but I wanted to check in for my nightly dose of vitamin F.
Yes, Pocket Party with me tomorrow!0 -
Beleive - My DD is 12 and she has a learning disability as well as the epilepsy that makes things much harder for her, but neither are stopping her from doing what she wants to. The teacher in charge of helping for History Day told her that it would be ok if she did not finish on time, but not only did she meet the deadline, but finished 8th! Most of the kids that participate in History Day are the very bright kids so this makes me even more proud of her! What snacks do you want us to bring today for the pocket party? I also love the Vitamin F analogy and will use it all the time from now on.
Ireland - I am not a huge risk taker myself, but I say go for it if you still feel good about it once you have really thought it through, which I assume you have already done.
Cembernardi - I used a lint roller as well on my head and after a couple of days all the stubble was gone. The itchy lasted for a while, but part of that may have been from the hats and scarves I had to wear all the time for the first 2 months until my youngest DD was ok with seeing me without anything on my head.
Hugs for anyone who needs them.0 -
Hi gals...sorry MIA this weekend....
Momof3Great.....how wonderful for you and your daughter....congrats. My younger son
has ADHD and always struggled through school.
Ireland....I probably would not have said this before BC but I'm saying it now....follow your dream.....you have your husband and son's blessing, it's only money.
Swgee.....went through the same last summer when my rads were finished....Inhave heard so many women tell the same story......getting my script for anti-depressants
Nd anti-anxiety meds helped a lot plus exercise and generally keeping myself busy.
Hang in there, it will pass.
Have a great day everyone. ❤0 -
Ok ladies I can't catch up... Someone give me a synopsis please? I saw a mention of a bread and water diet... Oh yummy BREAD!!!! :-). Can I have lemon In my water?
My diet has SUCKED this week and I've probably Put on weight. Looking at the photos taken of me with my DH at Seaworld are SHOCKING!!!! I can't believe how big I am!! Makes me want to cry.
I ran the first day here, went for a 1 1/2hr walk with my DH The second, then rain yesterday morning, and we leave today. The chilly air has rolled in behind the rain; and I suppose I was meant to ha e that beach holiday after all. *sigh*.
I won't be weighing in yet; I'm feeling rather broken to be honest. Maybe tomorrow when I'm back in my own home I'll feel more grounded. The time with my friend and her family has been a blessing, but a challenge. Her parents kept a winter home here (they are from England), and he passes two years ago from prostate cancer recurrence. So there's been lots of honoring and talking of him; for me hearing about a recurrence all the time... Well it just fucking sucks...! And makes me mad! I loved Les and he is truly missed. Hard to be here without him around giving me guff.
Ok, gotta run. Who's giving me the synopsis????? :-)0 -
juneau I'm not a very good synopsis person and I haven't been on that much so I will leave it to someone else. But did I miss you meeting up with you? going to Seaworld? I thought last week I read you were getting ready and coming down in a couple weeks for some reason. Where the heck was I; guess preoccupied with worrying about my lump and sonogram and Drs appts? Dang girl hope you enjoyed your self some despite the broken feelings. So sorry I didn't get to meet up with you.
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Juneau, I'd love to fill you in but I can't remember a damn thing that was posted and it would take me all day to re-read the last four days or so. And then by the time I got to the end, I would have forgotten already...maybe a younger brain can do it!!! LOL
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2fried; yes we were in your neck of the woods Friday, but we ended up driving with our friends on their minivan. There were 7 of us (with two little ones) so unfortunately no chance of a side trip.
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Swgee: I felt the same way as you after my last treatment (an oophorectomy in December) and starting Arimidex in January. Others on this board were tremendously comforting. I could not get out of bed, was exhausted, and was feeling stressed about starting to work full time again (even though I have my own small law firm). It has taken since then to start feeling good again -- what has helped me were simple things: (1) getting a LOT of sleep - 9 - 11 hours per night -- it's a cliche but sleep is a great healer; (2) eating a lot of vegetables and fruit & home cooked real food; (3) reading some books on healing including the one at the top of the page and a couple on super healing by a physiatrist; (4) walking a little every day - only 10 minutes to start, now about 20 each day and very slowly increasing; (5) reading this board even if I can't post much - everyone is so supportive and it helps me to realize I'm not the only one going through this; (6) adding in -- very slowly -- some easy social activities, like just getting together with friends for a visit in the backyard on the weekends. The coming of Spring, and being able to get outside, helps my mood too. Finally after 3 months, I am having more good days than bed, and able to sleep only 8 - 9 hours and get up, and work a solid 6 - 7 hours. Not yet a full recovery, but on the road -- and you will get there, too. I think the most important thing is to be kind to and gentle with yourself -- and to give yourself permission to rest!
Believe: I love the Vitamin F analogy! Your many upbeat contributions to this board are so encouraging.
Shari: hang in there, we are all cheering for you! Sounds like your parents are really helping.
Juneau: you have helped us all so much here by starting this discussion and helping us all by being emotionally real and true, and you have give so much comfort and courage to us all -- sending you a big hug, and wish I could send a nice hot cup of tea with a scone, real butter and marmalade to cheer you up. The weight will eventually yield, but doesn't have to move every day, and dealing with fear of recurrence is really hard emotionally.
Ireland: having started my own business, my advice is think through it hard before you leap, make sure you are prepared for the tradeoffs ( you will work really hard for at least two years for not very much money to get started -- and then you'll work very hard for a bit more -- but you will in exchange get a lot of control & if your business succeeds, it will be immensely satisfying). But there is NO guarantee you will make money. My cousin, a retired teacher, started a small coffeehouse/sandwich shop in a small town in Iowa a few years ago, and really enjoyed it -- and did well. She sold it a year or two ago as she found it too hard to sustain as she got older. Your location will be very important -- I do some work for retailers, and the thing you will need is traffic. You should think about what you plan to sell, who will buy it, how much they'll pay, and how much (materials, labor, insurance, rent, advertising etc) it will take you to produce what you sell and figure out if that will yield enough profit to be worth it.0 -
Ireland: my iPad cut me off. I hope this is helpful: I am trying to encourage you to ask the right questions of yourself before you leave something secure for something insecure. I think having your own business is absolutely the best way to get ahead (and to avoid the entrenched sexism that is endemic in corporate life) IF you (and your family) are ready for the challenges. My husband is pretty supportive, and my business is finally making money, but the lack of holidays can be wearing, and the amount of time I spend dealing with administrative issues -- which don't make me any money -- is huge. The down side to your own business is that it takes over your life: you are always on call-- if an employee does not show up, you have to cover; if a delivery is mislaid, you have to track it, etc. It also can be a bit lonely. The positives are the independence, the freedom to do things your way, the pride that comes with starting and growing your own business (especially as a woman), and over time the money. So do your diligence first, then if you think that's what you want, go for it! It's worth it if you are mentally and emotionally ready for it. Best of luck!
Embok0 -
Blasted cold! I feel horrible and can't sleep.. Trying to talk with docs to see what medicine I can take so close to surgery... Just want fro b able to have surgery
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Hi all... I spent the day yesterday in the yard and my greenhouse.....bliss. The yesterday evening... sat with my DH with a glass of wine and watched a series from the UK we have on the computer. Had fun at the hockey and casino... although lost $70 but it was still fun.
Hugs to all who need them - will try and catch up on all your posts from work today
Jumping in for any pocket parties too.0 -
Juneau - Welcome back or almost back! I hear ya on the weight thing I was down 3 lbs and then gained it all back but oh well I will just keep trying and dam it I am not going to let it beat me up! I went shopping this weekend and holy heck that was a tough one but I prepared myself to say I am just buying a few things now so i can wear them and I will get back to my orginal clothes in time especially when this weatehr gets better it has been a tough spring and running isn't taking off my weight so I need to watch what i am eating as well... I really dislike my hair during ths grow out stage I can't do anything with it and i don't want to get it cut again because I want it to grow but it is so course and so unlike my old hair:( i hope that changes at some point! not happy with it at all so on top of being chubby I have to have ugly hair:) oh well who cares people who judge me for those things have never been through what we have been through. Easier said that done some days but i am trying to not beat myself up for that right now! Hang in there with me:) Some days it take all I can do not to let this new image of myself ruin my days and take me to the dark depressed state but I am going to do my damest not too! But I do hate it! my boobs look like crap and my hair and body is has not weather this storm very well and needs some major repair work:)
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Hi all,
Jumping in to wish Happy Passover to anyone celebrating the holiday starting tonight, and an early Happy Easter wish too. I am still down here another week to help my dad and prepare all the foods for this holiday. So hard for him without my mom around anymore, but he not leaving here to move north by me. This, I believe is the reason I lost my job after more than 6 years right at rads time...so that I can be here for him and make the many trips down. He is so alone here but feels comfort in the surroundings he shared with mom. So thankful for my DH too, that he totally understands and puts up with me running down here so much now.
I saw this video a 12 year old girl made and sang for her mother diagnosed with BC. I think it is beautiful...called HOPE
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TC2kB9n1LeI
Hugs to all ...Shari just a few more days...hunt for that afikomen :}
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Wecome back, Juneau! You are so not alone in your weight struggles. I have upped my exercise to twice what I was doing before every day, I am trying to eat/drink no more than around 1200 healthy calories a day, no sugar, no fat, low carbs, but the weight is not moving. Put on 2 lbs during my weeklong holiday, because one has to relax now and then too, right? I am going to contact the nutritionists at our cancer agency, and see if they can maybe help me get control of this. It is so hard to stay motivated when there is zero reward for all the hard work.
Shari, so sorry to hear you have a cold now. Hopefully it's not serious, and you can shake it before Thursday. Lots of rest and Vit. C for you! Same thing happened to me last year before my mastectomy, but it cleared the day before surgery. I was so worried that the long-awaited surgery would be postponed because of that, but it went forward. Wishing you the best!
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Thanks for well wishes.. Hoping to kick it before surgery as well.. All has been building to this surgery I am going to have it Thursday.. Tryig to rest but its hard to sleep when I cannot breathe thru my nose hahha
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Thanks Ladies for all the advice, I will take it all on board and try and organise myself, get armed wit a detailed business plan and keep looking for the right location.x It is good sound advice and i appreciate the time you have all taken to reply.
Janeau I have a bit of an understanding...... one of the reasons i left work at the hospice it was the constant reminder. I found it constantly on my mind which was a mindf@@k .mcook ur hair will get better although mine is extremely dry so i use a mask and oil and it actually shines!!!my hairdresser said we should be getting it cut every 6 weeks!
Shari you are in my prayers.
Tazzy have u been to N.Ireland? Gotta go and watch corrie street. Take care everyone♡0 -
Just leaving my Doctors appt. still NED. Yeah! Hope you all enjoyed your pocket putting. I loved having you with me.
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Wonderful Believe! We weren't going to believe otherwise anyway. The pocket party was ok but you didn't bring all those cookies and things you baked!!!! That's ok I probably gained weight just thinking about them!
Shari hang in there and ditch the cold symptoms- surgery day is almost here and you can't get out of a pocket party with this group that easily.
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Believe, YAYYYY!!!!! Always such a relief . . . so happy for you!
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Congratulations Believe!!!!!!! The pocket party was great!
Shari- rest and get better and I will be with you on Thusday. You better make sure to wear big pockets as there will be quite a few of us there with you.
Hugs to those that need them.0 -
Yay.. believe -that's the words I am waiting to hear on Thursday too.
Ireland... no I've never been to N.Ireland - always wanted to, still on my bucket list... one day. Although it would've been quicker and cheaper if I had managed it from England and not Canada.
Get well soon wishes to you Shari.
Hugs to you all. I am not saying anything on the weight issues. Some days just feel 'thinner' than others.
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Believe.....happy happy news!!!!!.....what I want to know is what happened to the choc jube jubes 😡
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