Maybe a dumb flat question?
Comments
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**weeping from reading Bond's post on Legacy**Oh, DP,, you were so loved. I hope you can still feel it.
I'm glad you all liked the bird. Sorry for posting "green" pics when you are in a white-out. I do really feel bad for you.
Z: by "flocked", do you mean have a large bunch of birds dive bombing me for seed? I have not,, but seen it happen to people on the beach who are dumb enough to feed sea gulls. Pidgeons in NYC will do that too, but I didn't feed them either. Flying rats as far as I was concerned.
My eyes are weird. One eye has adjusted to far vision and the other to near vision. So basically I see distance only with the right eye and read with the left. Years ago I knew someone who had contacts to do that very thing, but somehow my eyes developed it naturally.
I raked 6 bags of leaves last night before it got dark. Believe it or not, I ran into my Rheumy at Home Depot when I went to buy more lawn bags. He said it was OK if I did gardening but to pace myself, that abrupt movements of my neck would be bad. So, YAY for having clearance to garden. Just gotta take it slow. I had cleaned out some behind the new neighbor's and when I saw him on Thurs, asked if he minded if I cleared out his path of the Boston Ferns,, and he said Great. So I am going to pot some of them up. Did not find anymore baby snakes yesterday.
We had a nice visit with friend. She's staying with her mom. Her brother, sister-in-law and new niece live on the property too so I got to meet SIL and the baby who is completely adorable. Big blue eyes! This friend is very spiritual and is trying to encourage me to think positively about my upcoming neck events. **don't think about what could go wrong, picture the good things, no more numbness in your hand when you drive, you'll be able to sew and write again** OK, I'll try this. It will be my focus at yoga tomorrow. There is a healing yoga class after the regular class. Going to both.
It's raining today. So I'll clean the office and start on my taxes. **waving to all**
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Around here, people get flocked on their birthday. They wake up to find a flock of tacky pink plastic flamingos in their front yard.
The Miami J collar is a real PITA. You have to sleep in the damn thing. I danced out to the trash can to pitch it.
Try a pressure washer with some bleach to get rid of the moss. They can be rented at Home Depot, Lowes.
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M, of course you walk around with a box-cutter.
So glad people are going to do the shopping event! Was starting to get Hurt Feelings. M, if you want you can watch on the internet, streaming, right? And then you can see what you want and I will buy it for you, right? Can you get American QVC?
Our princess sick yesterday and today. I'm pretty tired. Called dicktor and going for blood test next week; results appt on Friday.
In the bag and spreading the birdseeds today!
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That was beautiful Fia.. can't believe how quickly I get teary lately.. that is SO not me. I already made a small chewy donation, so I'm going to buy some skin cream or something from QVC, I think she'd approve... you know she loves her skin care. I was hoping today's special value would be something I'd have use for, but it's an Oreck Vacuum and I just bought a Shark.
I don't get the moss thing
Wren, that is so lovely, didn't upset me at all, it was good to see green even if it's somebody elses yard lol!
Glennie, glad you got the gardening approval and glad you are trying to see the positive side to this. Sounded like you had a wonderful visit
Be back in a bit.
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Aww, the princess... she have a cold.. flu? Glad you got the blood work scheduled.
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Dear DP - Listened to your Tori's "Pretty Good Year" and "Girl" and read some of your posts. There is such a void here now and I'm not sure we will ever be able to fill it. I miss your silliness and your fascinating views on everyday life.. I just miss you period. I wish you were here to comment on the delay of your service.. I think I can hear you now..... "FUCKTARDS!" Love you DP, thank you for all the smiles you gave me, and there were many.
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Scattered seed with BG around all the trees. Firebob and Shy Guy supervised. Love the Tori Amos sing Carry. "You are tattooed on my heart"
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You have my sympathy bobo. Sick kids. Ugh. Will eat a cookie for you.
Flocked here is a bunch of pink flamingoes in your yard. Can buy flock insurance. Local fundraiser.
Have sun today. Taking kids to park. Maybe can ride scooters or swing in the leftover snow.
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Nice letter, L.
I scattered birdseed and told her how much she was missed. It started raining. Heaven was crying.
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Well I fell asleep and woke up in a panic at 12:30. Ran outside and the birds were singing exceptionally loud. Sun is shining. Really a stunning day here compared to most. Just felt warm and different. Scattered the birdseed (ok.. threw it in clumps hoping they'd see it in the snow). I was feeling kind of sad and all "stupid girl, you missed the noon timeframe thing". Went into the upper cabinet to get my lighter to light some of my favorite incense from Nepal - then proceeded to turn around and hit my head on the cupboard door. I think that was DP whacking me for being late.
I can hear her saying. "of course it was me FFS - you fell asleep during my time?". Miss you DP. 0 -
I scattered half a package of seeds called Fairy Meadow. I'm afraid we'll have a freeze, so saved the other half to scatter later. I want to have flowers this summer to remind me of her.
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Hmmmm, my condolence on Legacy is not there. Weird. I'll have to try again.
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That's a pretty line Z.. enjoy your sunshine! Sunny here but extremely cold
PRB, Yep! She was whacking you upside the head for sure
Wren, those are perfect, I'll have to look them up.. fairy meadow.. so pretty.
Thank you, G.
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Idesim,
You are not alone. This time was my 4th cancer diagnosis. Over the years I have had chemo, radiation, countless biopsy's and medications and I have not once cried. Not even when my best friend died 5 years ago from BC. Her situation was very similar to DP (mets to brain , spine etc) .
I guess I am blaming this FOCKING arimidex for my emotional self . You can blame the tamox. But in a strange way for me it feels good to "feel" ...............
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Scattered A LOT of delicious birdseed. I only hope it will not cause Miguel to catch another bird.
Idesim, why can you not buy your cream during the ca and careers fundraiser event with us? Do not you understand it is fun to talk over the creams with a GF as you are buying them?
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That's true Fia, it does feel good to feel. Sorry about your GF.. focking disease.
I can Bobo, I didn't buy it, wish she was hear to yell at me
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Well, I will pick up the mantle of Sheila's yelling at you -- I will yell at you extra
FFS, please save your cream budget for the April fundraiser! Is it too much to ask to spend forty-five minutes to an hour talking to your GFs about the positive and negative aspects of 'cutting a bang'? April fundraiser $$ goes to charity! Cream now will go to QVC!!!
FFS!
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Morning all. I am going to plant today, I know she would understand me not doing it at 4am, between the fruit bats and the possums, digging in my garden in the middle of the night is a negative. I do have the strangest flower thing, which has just begun to protrude form a large spiked plant in my front harden. It has never flowered before, there are 2 of them. but it is just this one, which has the flower.
I can live stream QVC Bobo! Is our Princess OK?
Wren, it takes 24 hours for the legacy to appear, maybe longer, if it is a weekend, they have to check them before adding to the rest.
PRB, that's funny!
Lovely note to DP, ldesim. I am not taking any hormonals and I can tear up very easily these days, so not me, at all. I am also angrier than I probably should be. "Look out, stupid people", is my catch cry at the moment, I am so pissed at the futility of DP's passing and I am ready to launch at anyone, who says anything dumb about cancer. I got like this over Vi too, but for a totally different reason, I wanted to slap him up the side of the head, for taking his own life, talk about futile, so I know this feeling will pass. I just wish Mystique wasn't in for repairs, I'd take her out and anchor somewhere remote and scream very loud!
Waving to everyone, taking Dex for a big walk this morning, might chuck some rocks in the lake, or something!
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Been hibernating all day. Listened to Tori Amos, gave extra lovies to my pups, etc. no housework, nor am I making dinner. Birdseed will have to wait until the hard snow melts. Otherwise I am making it way too easy for the feral cats! Will do the QVC thing in April along with planting forget me nots.
Wish I could find something to take away my scalp pain. Yes, it hurts as my hair grows....only me!
Need some beach time to soothe my soul.
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Sc, you sound about as flat as I feel! Ouch, for the painful scalp, how about a head massage with warm oil, wrap in ceram wrap and then a warm shampoo? I'd do it for you, if I was there. M x
Meant to say, first day of Autumn here, so tomorrow is the start of your Spring!
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Morning all, M, I didn't get up at 4 am either, knowing that DP would be ok with that.
Ok, so I need to talk something out with you all. Sorry if it is a bit long. Last night DS went to a birthday party with some new friends at school. Pizza place first, then 10 pin bowling with disco ball, music etc. Because he is allergic to eggs and peanuts, and needs to carry an epipen, I hung around to A). Make sure the Mum understood and
to watch and check out these new friends lol. He has been messaging one girl a lot, so I think he has his first crush, aawwwww! Lol (he has just turned 14). So the Mum had planned that the eight of them have their own table ! and can do their own ordering of food, drink etc. The mum was on her own and invited me to sit with her and have a drink, at another table in sight of the kids. Anyway, sorry I am rambling. Her other DS passed away about two years ago from cancer, she told some stories about him Isaid how her remaining son (the birthday boy) had had to grow up so fast, he loved his brother so much, and he completely organised the funeral, and carried the coffin (at 11 years old). So I am feelings a bit teary by this stage and feel like I need to tell tell her about about my diagnosis, Full disclosure type thing. Anyway this is the bit i wanted to tell, , she started to walk with me towards towards my car, and said, I know I shouldn't but I need a cigarette. I made a deal with (deceased son) that if he could heal his cancer, I would quit smoking. WTF? She put it on a 9 year old to heal his cancer, so she would quit smoking ?! I can't stop thinking about that. Feeling sad and angryTyping going so slow, going to post now. Xx
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M first day of Spring is March 8th. Yes, I guess I am feeling flat, and angry. Had some supper so I'm not as angry! Lol Angry at fing cancer, my family, my limitations, my DH, DP's dicktors, my dicktors, don't think I need to go on. Anger is a waste of time, but I guess it does have its merits. I have made beautiful gardens, rooms, and blankets when I have been angry. Unfortunately I don't have these outlets open to me now. So I guess I need to find another outlet. Hummmm.....
Dawny that birthday boy's mum sounds a bit off. Maybe it just didn't come out right? Possibly bargained with God, not her dying child? As in if he is healed I swear I will stop smoking. People try to bargin in dire situations all the time.
Love the ghost hand spooky! That is priceless! I wonder how they did that???
Took a Gabapentin for my scalp. Pain has finally backed off a bit. I should be in a better mood now, oh wait, DD is due home in half an hour. Never mind!
Hope everyone is hanging in there today. I know it's been a tough one.
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Dawny, Hi Betty! I am so sorry that mom affected you badly. You sound so shaken up. You rarely talk about yourself, it is rare that I get a chance to do something for you...
Betty, I am sending you hugs. {{{dawny}}} It must have been hard to be about to share with someone, but then that someone turns out to be... a little unstable? Hard to get it out of your mind, I imagine. It takes a lot of mental fortitude to not visit that kind of stress on your own kids. Not everybody has it.
Come here! Have pizza with me! I will make lunches without eggs and peanuts -- our princess is allergic to both, but I would do it anyway. Poor Betty. I will be your friend! I'm hungry at the moment and I wish we could be eating some warm delicious GF cake with raspberries and vegan cream.
M, don't worry about not getting up in the night and fighting bats! DP would want you to sleep in. S, so sorry about your scalp! M seems to have a good idea about that. Have you ever heard of... I am going to spell it wrong... abhyanga? It's an ayurvedic spa treatment where they pour warmed sesame oil on your forehead and it drips down through your scalp? It sounds like a perfect idea for you at the moment.
DLLP is making the fried rice! It's her best dish. XXX
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That sounds unusual to me, we start our seasons on the 1st day of the month they fall on.
I would hope your explanation was the right one, for that Mother Dawny met. I was thinking that she was comparing her quitting smoking as being as difficult as healing yourself of cancer, but hell I am a nasty negative nellie right now, so what do I know?
That ghost hand is reeally spooky Spookiesmom! LOl That made me smile!
Still haven't made it out the door with Dex, he wants to go out, but I am procrastinating, my feet are sore! M x
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"Hi Betty". !!
Thanks S, I hope you are right, that it just came out the wrong way. I just cannot imagine having your young child so sick, chemo etc and then lose him to this stupid disease! Blah! I guess my/our Mums feel the same, even though we are not young children, we are still "their" children.
Thank you Bobo, I would love to come and eat cake with you! Is the princess gluten free also? Or you? Yay for DLLP making fried rice. I have just been for a walk, and am now enjoying a blueberry/choc protein shake. It has chia seeds and banana, so is very thick. DD just said eeewwww, don't eat that! Ha. Just woke up DS at 11am, seems he would sleep in all day if I let him. DH out racing on his bike, DD playing Minecraft.
Sorry you are having scalp troubles S, the fun never ends does it? Sorry you are feeling angry, I think the loss of DP has hit us all hard. I am feeling off too. I have Herceptin infusion tomorrow, and then full scans three weeks after, so I think the stress of that is getting to me. hugs to you S xx
M, how did it get to be Autumn already!? Did you get the storms last night?. I am a bit of a wuss when it comes to thunder and lightening lol
Group hug to everyone. Xxx
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Talk about it all "getting to us". Spring starts the 20th of March. We change the clocks on the 8th to daylight savings time. We used to change them later. I think I am totally losing it! Lol
M the hair treatment sounds wonderful! That won't get rid of the problem, nerve damage. Someone likened it to Fibromyalgia. All my nerve endings have gone haywire.
Bobo- I haven't heard of that treatment, sort of reminds me of water boarding! Drop, drip, drip! Yikes! I would love some fried rice! Sounds delish!
Dawny-Do your Herceptin infusions have any side effects? I usually come home and sleep for four hours. My last one is Thursday! In the bag for your scans!
Yes, DD came home and was her usual mean self. I was explaining why there wasn't any supper made, not to be confused with nothing to eat, because my scalp hurt like hell and she said, "Remember when we used to talk about something other than cancer." She then turned on her heels and left my room. Wow, it wasn't like I didn't ooh and ahh over her Ulta purchases, ask how work and school were today, and gave her an update on her dog, that I take 100% care of everyday. Yes, I need a vacation!
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SC, I commend you for not coming back with something really cutting that you would later regret. Several things flashed into my mind as I imagined the scene.
We took Squeakers to meet his vet yesterday. She looked at his teeth and didn't say they needed work. I was worried about that. He got his rabies shot and finally squeaked for her so she understood his name. I love it when it's time to leave and they willingly hop into the carrier to go back home. What a contrast to how difficult it is to get them in it at home.
I'm feeling the flat/down mood also. Found out they euthanized a cat at the shelter that I didn't think needed it. I felt like quitting on the spot. The other team leaders are equally unhappy about it. He was a very sweet cat and his former foster parent was willing to take him back.
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Oh Wren I am so sorry about the cat! I hate when they put them down for no valid reason. Rescue can be so hard and devastating! I was glad to hear that Sqeekers is doing well. You have a heart of gold
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Oh Wren, I am sorry they put down the cat and that you're in a flat/ down mood too.
I went for a big walk with Dex, in really high winds and I have managed to get rid of some of my aggro! I feel better, even chatted to DP while the wind was whipping up white caps and waves were smashing against the sea wall.
SC, can't daughters be such bitches, I remember when Bec had her "all about me!" phase and I could have walloped her silly. I found the silent treatment worked far better than a rant. I agree with Wren, you have to be commended for not saying something you may regret!
I have had the Ayurvedic treatment Bobo mentioned, with the fine stream of oil on your forehead, it is one of the most relaxing things ever. It won't cure the problem Sc, but you'd feel good! LOL
Hey Dawny, I know, Autumn already! We had howling winds off Bass Straight last night, but no storms or rain. I actually, really love to watch the big storms we get here, but one of Colin's carers is phobic about thunder and lightning and gets all worked up because there is nowhere she can escape it here, we have big roof windows and clear skylights in nearly every room so she can't really hide from it.
I am in the bag for your infusion tomorrow and for the scans in 3 weeks. Hugs to you, do you go to Melbourne for the scans?
I haven't found the right plant yet, so that is on my list for tomorrow now. I was going to do a big pot of Bush Orchids, but decided against that and want something more permanent and less likely to be fussy.
Need to do afternoon tea now, our guest is here till Tuesday. I have a Kangaroo roast for tonight or tomorrow night, depending on what everyone feels like. Catch you later! M x
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