Maybe a dumb flat question?
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omg z! Thanks for saying that about the dots. I thought it was another vision issue. I see little points of light all the time. Ha
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oh I forgot to say z, can you bribe boy or make a game out of him giving you a foot rub?
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Zills, hope he comes to his senses soon!
I am jealous that he holds you every night, and tells you he loves you. The last time my hubby said he loved me was about a week after my diagnosis. It was also the first time in over a decade. Except for the obligatory "I love you too" when I won't hang up the phone until he says it back.
As far as holding....had a lot of quarrels about that. I really needed to be held for months after my diagnosis. He might have done it half a dozen times...but never without me pleading
.He jumps out of bed early and works on his computer before heading into work. He would program in his sleep if he could, lol. Don't remember last time we kissed....pretty sure it was in 2014 tho.
But he looked after me when I came home from hospital, and he likes to do the grocery shopping...so I will keep him.
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I get lots of cuddling from my grand kids all summer though!
Oh, I told my husband I was going to hire a professional hugger...he was not impressed. Lol!
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The kids are so cute!!!Laundry finished,,, will take Ava out and hopefully go to sleep.
Night all.
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The kids look so cute in the patch. BIL in Cinti says frost warning tonite, the kids look like it might be chilly for you too?
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Ariom, DP has a good suggestion about Bec & Mary. There's a statue here of people waiting for the interurban (streetcar back in the 1920's). The sculptor was feuding with another man and put his face on the dog. It took years for him to get paid because of that. People dress up the statue for all sorts of celebrations, birthdays, holidays etc. In fact the statue is dressed more often than not. We dressed it for GS 18th birthday and had breakfast at the restaurant looking out over the statue. I'm sure Mary could use an umbrella, scarf, raincoat, etc.
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Wren and DP, I love that idea of dressing Mary up. I will tell her tonight and show her the picture you posted Wren. I don'tt know if she will be able to do it because they are always home. She hasn't been able to get the picture of the first Mary looking like she had been mugged, for that reason. I want to know where the original one is, Is she in the trash, or is she hidden somewhere in the garden with her decapitated head in the bushes for someone to stumble across?
You're going to love the Pap story girls, it could only happen to me!
I get there and Libby does all the other stuff, blood pressure, weight, height, asks all the relevant questions and then says "Moira, we have a student Doctor from Monash working with us and I was wondering if you would allow him to do your test today, I will be here to oversee it, it is so important that they are able to work on real patients?" Of course I say it's ok, Gosh with all the gyn stuff I have had done over the years, I am not embarrassed any more. Anyway this gorgeous young Cluneyesque young Doctor, with jet black hair and lashes that sweep his eyebrows, comes in and introduces himself and thanks me profusely for allowing him to do this test. We get underway and there's a slight cafuffle going on at the other end because he is left handed and he's approaching from the right side. Libby is trying to explain that we should have had me the other way around, so he wasn't doing it backwards. He kept apologizing, but he managed to get it all done with no pain for me and Libby made certain that each step was followed. It probably took 3 times the length of time it should have, but hopefully this guy will get better with each attempt. Oh and he did tell me I have a really healthy looking cervix! I was rather flattered by that! Libby hugged me and told me I was the first and only, to say yes, and allow him to do it. I feel like I've done a good deed for the day! lol
Zills, those Pumpkins look sensational! Did you carve those faces into real Pumpkins? I love the pics of the kids, BG looks so cheeky!
Colin is very huggable and kissable! I actually love that I can snuggle into him and I can feel his heart, through my flat side.
Just last night when I was putting him to bed, I was running around in just a pair of knickers, getting his stuff together, I know, I know TMI LOL, but it was hot last night and I have to share that part, because it is part of the story. Anyhoo, he looks up at me and says "You know, I am so used to seeing that flat side and scar, it is just part of you now and I don't think of you any other way, any more, it doesn't put me off in any way, I don't find it unattractive!" So, I am basking in this lovely moment and guess what he says next? "But I sure do, still like the other one!" He got a slap to the side of the head for that!
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OMD LMAOROF
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OMG,, thanks for the morning laugh! (laughing helps cancer, right?) You had a good looking man between your legs and then the quips from Colin! love it!And I LOVE the idea of dressing Mary up. Too bad they are always home.
Reporting in on sleep: went to bed at 9. Took melatonin 3 mg and Valium 2.5 mg. Only woke twice. did not get out of bed until after 8AM. So I don't feel too badly today. Will try only the melatonin tonight as I don't want to take the V every night.
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M, Where can I sign up for the hot intern???? And I laughed out loud at your story too! Wait! Don't you have big windows in your house? Flashing the neighbors now are we?!
Glennie, glad you had a better night. I don't remember what it feels like to sleep soundly all night either.
How are you DP, Zills and Bobo?
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laughing at Colin. He he good one. M did you tell the gyn about the deep discounts you normally get by letting students at you? Like the facials and such?
Glad you got a little rest glennie. How is Ava?
Bentley the dog tested negative for Ebola. Whew!
Fun pic wren. Those people have to sleep sometime m. Im thinking she could make her a toilet paper mummy. For Halloween!
Back hurts as usual. Don't know what to do about it. Going to lunch with bonds elderly girlfriend today. Id rather just hibernate but I've been putting her off for two weeks.
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Hi guys! G just paid me a visit and it was soooo nice. Popping in to say I am okay and hanging in there, no fever, but pretty beat. G brought me juice and soup! Major MD drama. Z when is your nitty gritty appt? Can't wait to hear about doggie! Hi DP! **waving**
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Good news about Bentley!! Ava is limping. Neighbors noticed. Gave her cookies, which made her very happy. Then we hobbled home.Deep discounts for students to observe/perform procedures?? Great idea!! I'm all for that. Bond's elderly girlfriend?? Lunch? Hope it's good lunch. Sucks about back,,, no meds help??
And I saw Bobo and Bobo dog. Both happy to see me. Bobo got juice and soup, forgot to bring something for Bobo dog. *bad me* next time.
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Morning ladies, glad you enjoyed the story of my Pap test, Bec was mortified!
Andrea, we have blinds in the bedroom! lol No neighbors to see in anyway, just water in front and tinted windows too!
Glennie, do you know why Ava is limping? Glad you got to sleep and also managed to get to see Bobo!
Bobo, I am glad you're not suffering after the procedure, but that you have to suffer MD, what happened?
DP, I hope the lunch was nice and that your back isn't giving you too much grief.
Didn't have to mention the discounts, all free!
I am being driven around the bend with bloody Sand Fly bites again, I hate those things. I didn't do the hot water routine fast enough, so they have really kicked in.
Catch you later..M x
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sitting outside. It's the end if October and mosquitoes biting my feet. Grrr. I hope they get cancer. (Did y'all read that? That if people without cancer touch the chemo drugs, they get cancer in 20 years or something)
Poor Ava. How old is she? Arthritis? Displacia?
Bonds girlfriend is a 80 year old German woman. she loves dogs. He lives several blocks over and somehow encountered bond when he was walking Reggie a couple years ago. She gives him treats. Lots of treats. Now Toby gets treats too. She comes and feeds them when we go out of town. I call her his girlfriend because early on in their relationship she insisted on taking him to dinner. So he took her to Red Lobster and I said it was a date. She checks on me and makes sure i don't need anything since I can't drive.
Good to hear from you bobo! Glad you have soup and hope you get some rest.
Hi everyone. Bingo legs. Goin to scratch my feet now.
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Ava is a rescue,, so we really don't know how old she is. I've had her almost 4 years,, and we "think" she is about 7,, but we could be totally wrong. She was with the rescue group for a year,, and she had at least one litter of pups,, so who knows?? She does have bad hips. We x-rayed them last time and they have shallow cups so her hips are not well seated in the joints. not good for her. Maybe she needs more arthritis meds? Anyway, I will see what the vet thinks on Sat.Yes, you can get cancer from chemo drugs. I know this cuz I am a pharmacist and have had to mix them before. Is this why I got cancer? Who the hell knows? But you have to put on gown and double gloves and mask and eye protection, etc etc to mix it.
Damn mosquitoes,, should be gone by now. It's October. We still have them too.
Ok,, break over,, back to work!!!
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PS. love Bond's girlfriend!!!0 -
Hi Glennie! Just in from shopping, boy is it ever hot out there today. We don't ever get any warning, just goes from cold to hot!
You know what? When I had my first shot of Methotrexate, the Doctor was all suited up with gloves and a visor on, it scared me shitless and it didn't make me feel confident about having it injected into me at all. I learned to inject myself, because I couldn't take the tablet form and every Tuesday, for over 7 years I injected myself with it. Do I think that's why I am here now? Yep, and also those chemicals I was subjected to in the tint room, when I was doing my hairdressing apprenticeship.
I love Bond's girlfriend too, what a nice lady! M x
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You never know, M,,,, you just never know. No telling what crap gave it to us. Just the bad luck of the draw.0 -
My Gyn told me I have cancer because I pissed off God. Lol
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what???? Are you joking???? I would have been really pissed if someone told me that.0 -
well guess we all pissed God off huh?? This is an interesting subject as with the chemicals,, never heard that before about handling it anyway, sure could be tho. There are so many chemicals surrounding all of us anymore, hate it but what do we do? So ironic that chemo can cause it but is what they give us to cure it?? Find a cure. I see on news where they are frantically working on a vacine for ebola (dont get me wrong.. hope they find it) but where is the big push for a vacine for cancer, diabetes etc. I get so skeptical at times that the big pharma companies dont want a cure because they wouldnt make all the crazy amounts of $$$ they do now! What do you think Glennie??
Hi Bobo, hang in there, you have us all just waiting for the MD story... must be a doezzy! SP?
Love bond's girlfriend too DP!! how is the ear?
Well my pap smear is in the morning, but I know I wont have Ariom good luck with any good looking young man,. mine is a woman!!
Ariom has all the luck! just kidding, I hate these test, guess bc must have changed the rules because thought if I was 65 didnt have to have them anymore.
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Zills, love your pictures, sweet kids! Thanks for sharing.
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i think if they found a cure they would be charging huge $$$$ for it. They would make money, no doubt.And they are frantically looking for an Ebola vaccine NOW,,, cuz it is affecting places other than Africa,, Ebola has been around a long time,, and now there is a rush??? **call me skeptical**
edit:: wrong word,,, cynical,,,, that's it. I tell you,, my brain needs estrogen,,, I'm worried.
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Rains here have begun in earnest. My bus from my painting class drives thru the U. of Washington campus. Just as he started into the campus, huge raindrops began beating down, really hard. Students ran like roaches in all directions. Our sweet bus driver stopped at every crosswalk to let drenched students cross. I saw a few students get on and get off 2 stops later. It passed over and let up just before I had to transfer. And the next bus was there when I got to the stop. Wednesday the rainfall broke the previous record for that date.
If my gyn told me I had cancer because I pissed God off, I would have a new gyn and that one would have been reported to the powers. That's what I like about my HMO, there are higher ups who would listen and reprimand.
I was taken aback when a lab tech wearing lead garments brought up the radioactive tracer to find the sentinal nodes. I wondered just how radioactive that stuff was.
My guess on cause is all the chemicals and DDT we were exposed to as children. Gasoline had lead, preservatives were put in the food, and people bought more food at the store. My mother's oldest brother came to her funeral and looked wonderful. He was a wheat farmer who ate from his big garden and spent his days outside working. He was mid 90's and looked 70's.
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I've thought long and hard about causes. Being triple negative, that means I got cancer for no reason at all. Sweet. Perhaps I really did piss god off. It wouldn't surprise me. But I've come to the conclusion that it is stress. A lot Of interesting things about cortisol and I think the dots connect for me. Anyhow..
Ear still stopped up. No call from ENT still so it will likely be late next week before I get an appt. after the poisoning resumes. I know it is so early on in this treatment to have these feelings but I don't know how much of this chemo I can take. I'm so tired of being miserable every single day. What's the point? I'm not contributing anything to society. I'm being a burden to my family and friends. And for all of that, I can't even have one day of feeling good. And if I'm lucky, these drugs will work indefinitely and I get to do this for the rest of my life. I know I need to stop being negative. But damn it I'm tired and havif a moment. I'm mad that this is happening to me. I've run every bad thing I ever did to anyone through my mind and try to think if it makes me deserve this. I know. It's really just a crap shoot. Pity party not helping the snot factory. Have to stop.
What's going on on the farm z? And yes this MD story is highly anticipated.
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bobo! Who is this hag presenting with the philosophy lady? Surely this isn't supposed to be a replacement for Lisa!
Rant over. Was trying to soothe my nerves with qvc. That did not work!
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omg. Over reaction update. I just realized it's Jane! She doesn't even look like herself. Don't know what she did but it is NOT flattering.
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I figured I got breast cancer because exactly a year before I was diagnosed my 27 year old daughter had a cancer scare. When she had her biopsy I begged God to give me cancer instead of her. I guess he was listening that day. I'm thinking I should have prayed that neither of us got it. Damn!
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