STEAM ROOM FOR ANGER
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Okay, my next contact with that witch would be at her funeral and then only to make sure she is dead. Once confirmed she is, I would leave. If your hubby doesn't speak up, then I would let him visit on his own and avoid that aggravation you do not deserve or need.
Congratulations on finishing credits towards your degree. Once you earn it, no one can take it away and you most certainly do not have to limit yourself to the jobs the witch suggested. She is jealous and is not worthy of your presence. As far as her attacking your sister due to her genetic make-up, that is beyond cruel and tolerable. I am sure she was a beautiful bridesmaid and will cherish that moment forever. You are a beautiful person and that should be your mantra.
It took me years to make the break from my MIL but when I finally did, I felt liberated because DH was not capable of putting her in her place. When she died, I skipped the viewing and the burial. She did not deserve nor acknowledge my presence in life and I wasn't about to be a hypocrite at her death. Sometimes you have to honor yourself.
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Oh m0mmy I'm sorry, that's gross. I agree with the others, you can't have her in your life. She is plain wrong and gross.
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I agree it's best to just keep toxic people from being a part of your life.
I have a crazy friend who I just saw last night. She is 1 of 6 of us that have stuck together since high school. Luckily, she took off to FL and lives there now so I don't see or talk to her too often. I do truly care for her and her well being, BUT my goodness, it took me a good hour to decompress from being with her and get some sleep. Pretty sure she has major anxiety, always thinks she's dying. She does have an RA diagnosis, she's currently wearing a heart monitor, and she just lost another job. Someone she worked with. She obviously doesn't play well with others. How unprofessional is that? She has been estranged from her own daughter for years.
Anyway, the 5 of us were up early this morning texting and the word crazy was in there alot. I wonder if one day I will just speak my mind to her, but we do our best to be supportive of her and our life long friendships.
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Congrats Mommy!! Use YOUR degree as you see fit. Go no contact with the monster. I had to go low contact with mine, then when we moved to Florida no more problems.
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Thankfully, I see her very rarely as my hubby dislikes his step-monster as much as I do. His father is no saint either and he doesn't get a pass from either of us. I talked to my mom last night and told her the crap that was going on and she was not to happy to hear what was said about my baby sis. My step-monster in law better pray my mom doesn’t come back this way as it will be a smackdown and my mom would win, she spitting mad! As for step-monster in law and his dad’s funeral, at this point they are a no go for either of us! That was settled back after my cancer diagnosis as they were being very cruel to both me and hubby after they found out and their exact words and attitude was hubby would be better off if I were dead!
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OMG, mommie!
As a MIL I can't think of anything worse to say! You should be VERY proud of your degree! Congratulations!!!! All I ever wanted for my two children was a college education! Both earned their degrees, and I couldn't be prouder of them!
Pity your poor MIL, she has no heart, or brain, or both! I worked with special education students in our local school district for 33 years. They varied in their needs and conditions, but what your MIL said about your sister should never have been said about anyone! Those with disabilities, most have more courage and kindness in their little finger than the rest of us have in our whole bodies! Shame on your MIL!
I think it's awesome that you had your sister in your wedding! Weddings are about love, not only between the couple being married, but by all the people in attendance.
Next time your MIL makes a rude comment, look her straight in her eyes and say "I don't remember anyone asking for your opinion, especially one that comes from such a dark place inside you!"
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Oh believe me, I got a good one boiling just waiting for the right time to use it. When it comes its gonna be like a 2x4 between the eyes! She’s told so many lies about so many things that Karma is going to mow her down and I can’t wait!
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Clueless idiot barely knows me: Duh why do you walk with a cane now?
Me: um... Because breast cancer chewed my spine in half and did nerve damage and I'm full of metal...
Idiot: you know cancer grows on sugar so that be something to think about blah blah
I should say you know I've heard being punched in the face while eating cauliflower gives you perfect bowel movements.
Why do people believe this stuff and talk about that instead of anything else? Why can't people think before speaking or just shut **** up?
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mkestrel,
It’s amazing that so many people around us are cancer experts! Not! Amateur oncology? No, thank you.
I am not by nature a ranter but I got a text this past Friday night from a parent at my former school. Background: She had three children who attended my school but none were in my class. It was well known that I was open and willing to speak to anyone about breast cancer (yup, even let a parent cop a feel of my implant 🤣). About 5-6 years ago this parent came knocking on my classroom door. She’d just been dx’ed. Surgery, chemo but then mets to her spine. Many treatments, progression to liver, etc. Here’s what her text said, “End of the road for me”. She’s in liver failure and out of options and making hospice arrangements. Despite having a very clear eyed view of what stage IV is , I am devastated. Her youngest is still in high school.
It’s interesting that our initial relationship was based on both of us having bc but she is such a lovely person that I consider her a friend. This is hitting me very hard. If I got a stage IV miracle for 12 years why couldn’t she? I know there is no logical answer to that question but I am simply destroyed by the unfairness of it all. Nope, you don’t get used to it, even after 12 years.2 -
Wandered in b/c I was seeking a post to help someone else outside the community. Lots has changed in format. Not as easy as it was to follow your own topics or the all topics.
Glad I wasn't here in the pandemic. Likely would have been censored and or barred.
Lots of misinformation here and absence of scientific discernment re pandemic. The truth is coming out about what the government hid. I'll leave it at that. EXCEPT FOR:
KEYWORDS search: All-Cause Mortality and Morbidity increases (choose country or regions) Comparisons
Masks studies: Denis Rancourt April 2020 analysis of all studies produced post SARS1—-19studies— conclusion except for one study commonly known as the Nurses study proved that masks don't work. It was smeared as Rancourt was smeared. As anyone in the early two years that disagreed with the government narrative.
What is telling about Rancorts study is it was before the controversy about Masks. In a usual time, his study would have been a benchmark study. Which means it would have been greatly valued and cited in journal articles.
Governments, here and worldwide, without evidence, promulgated that masks worked. This resulted in mandates of mask wearing, infringed on individual rights, and disenfranchised people of their inalienable rights.
Initially, I watched four countries.
Italy b/c it has a national databases of it's population. Watched them for 20 years. When they produced data regarding covid info it was meaningful b/c they had everyone's info//quadrant/region/town.
Second, was Taiwan, Taiwan sent the earliest signals that something was happening and activated their emergency response plan in Jan 2020. They had experienced SARS in2003 and had established protocols. They instituted protocols before even China.
Third Sweden, they caught my eye b/c they weren't complying with the worldwide shutdown. So, what was interesting about Taiwan and Sweden is they were opposite ends of the spectrum. Interesting, they both did well.
The fourth country was Israel, they published oodles for a time. Then nothing, it's a blackout of news regarding Israel covid. But when they were publishing it was very helpful. Not sure what caused them to stop publishing.
What we can look at today that may discern what happened is, Total Cause Mortality and Morbidly per country. There are spikes that are VERY unusual. You may try to say no connection. BUT. It will take years to figure this out. If anyone says they have the answer they are full of cow manure0 -
Sas-schatzi-Good to see you back! So frustrating that Covid was politicized and we still can't get answers.
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I was sitting in Urgent Care the other day with vomiting and dehydration. Cancer drugs related. I had my barf bag and was using it. I was wearing my mask when I didn't have to pull it down. I apologized to the woman next to me, letting her know that my gagging was cancer related, not COVID. She started going off on the mask conspiracy. Sheesh, lady. I was just trying to let you know I'm not contagious.
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Sunshine,
some people have no filter and don’t think before they speak!0 -
I have been off for a bit since still recovering after my fall and surgery and not even where I can go on a walk yet. DH has to walk our dog now alone. She is happy I guess since he can go faster than I could anyway. I just got caught up reading posts though finally.
I agree it is more difficult sometimes and I kind of have to work at it to find where I want to be in here. I know they did it for a reason but for some of us any change is hard for us as well and we had to deal with so much already.
Have testing for MO coming up later this week for lab work and then will be the dreaded mamo on my non-cancer side that has already had issues they are watching right now. The fear never goes away.
I did see someone mention exercise issues and energy. If anyone has AARP access they have some great videos on there that are about 10 minutes and a lot can be done sitting in a chair even. Free and you can pause if you want to and do it on demand in there. I try to do a little bit every day sitting in my chair now since I can't walk and figure better than nothing at least and does get my heart rate going.
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@bcincolorado thanks for the AARP suggestion. Also Silver Sneakers website has lots of exercise videos for seniors
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Hi Chicagoan, the fog is lifting re the truth. Spain as brought their chief honcho up on charges, Scotland produced a report that was in the news yesterday effectively condemning the mandated stuff, Pfizer exec admitted during inquiry in Australia this week that a different batch was flown in for Pfizer people.
Just as in all research reading the actual study is the best, but not a guarantee the peer reviewed study is a good one. Recently a big wig doc from Harvard that was a world expert on Honesty has had all her research retracted for the last ten years or so b/c she falsified data. Untold numbers of other studies using her research are being retracted. Ironic, Honesty expert 's whole career a fraud. Another, professor at Florida State "renowned expert" on crime is out of a job and research being pulled b/c he falsified data when a research assistant ratted him out for playing with the numbers.
Plug in the word Errata should bring up the website that is the central place for info of retractions from peer reviewed journals. There are other specific websites that are watching for retractions.
The overall damage done by people that cheat in science is so sad and criminal, b/c once out into the internet all the info can't be corrected. People are harmed by the cheating
Can anyone tell me how to find "your topic list"
Bcincolarda, sorry to here things aren't good. Blessings. Thanks for the couple of notes I found in my inbox.
Anyone have Egads007 topic on Keto link???? It was the mostly perfect put together info.0 -
Hi @sas-schatzi!
You can find your list of favorite topics by clicking My Bookmarks in the Quick Links menu bar on the right of your screen on desktop, or at the bottom of the page on mobile. You can also access these by clicking your profile image, and then selecting Bookmarks.
We hope this helps!—The Mods
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Had mamo and us on non-cancer side this week. Fortunately they read it for me and I do not have to wait for results. The spot they are watching appears a little smaller they think. I have very dense tissue so it is hard to see. I call them stupid boobs. Looks like cancer labs were ok maybe. Hopefully when I see MO next week she agrees and lets me off for a bit but do not know if she agrees or not. Sometimes she is more picky it seems than the radiologists are. Seems like the testing and waiting never ends.
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Aw, bcincolorado, I feel sorry for you! I am at the point where I want nothing to do with anything even remotely associated with breast cancer! I still visit BCO because there are some non-cancer topics I like, and some, like this one which I still read.
I think the waiting and testing does get less, but never really ends. I had two mastectomies, so no real boobs and the testing and waiting hasn't ended. I decided to just enjoy the time between appointments and try not to think of breast cancer. Hope you can find some enjoyment free of breast cancer too!
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True so true, I think the key to survival is staying ahead of and top of approvals by insurance and knowing doc limitations. I'm here simply b/c I UNDERSTAND THE SYSTEMS. Didn't mean to cap i.e.yell. I made so many things happen in the firsts weeks of my DX. between docs and insurance. Breast cancer and brain tumor dx'd the same day. Breast surgeon said see you in three months b/c the assumption the brain tumor took precedence over the BC. B/C I knew as a nurse, I understood how to get things done, and I got it done, I was on the table 3 weeks later. That was 2009.
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I knew medical stuff since DIL is an RN and DH is a transplant patient and diabetic so we had learned a lot before I got bc or my dementia. I think the docs sometimes do not understand why we are not freaking out about something when a lot of people do and sometimes at this point it is almost "one more thing to deal with" and we have to try to keep going for our grandkids. and to at least make it until my parents pass away if I can. Dh has lost his already but I have mine and my mom moved here so know I will have to deal with that or DH will at some point. Just trying to keep cancer away and my dementia from getting worse if I can. The kind I have is like what Bruce Willis has, aphasia and there are different kinds and words are hard and typing sometimes. Glad not working on a computer and dealing with clients all day. Could not do with that.' DH has to talk to the docs sometimes for me since he can answer their questions and knows the answers they ask.
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Thank you for sharing all that bcincolorado. Hang in there! You've got alot on your plate, and appreciate your sharing.
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Wow, thise last few posts really triggered me. Guess you all don't believe that population density matters and that covering mouth and nose while sniffling, coughing, contagious with any upper repertory illness slows the spread.
Like most of us here, I have medically induced nutrepenia due to cancer meds. I am on subway every day. I appreciate others not coughing on me. I plan to mask on transportation for the long term. To keep my upper respitory infections of all varieties to a minimum.
I've been in rural places and I get it that it seems unnecessary. In suburban grocery stores, it's normal to be "socially distanced" just because there is space. In the ubway, I am pressed against strangers. Many of them traveling from places that don't get density.
Cities are different. Public transportation is different.
Not to get political, but SAS, I am glad you are not my next door neighbor.
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dancemom even though we are super vaccinated DH is a transplant patient and we pretty much live at home most of the time. Our local grocery is closed right now after issues during remodeling for a few months and we get free deliveries right now. Tip the driver and order is not always right but not going even to the store and they leave it at the front door even in a few hours after we order. Most of the time not even up to sitting in the cry room at church (alone) in a high back chair where I can put my feet up on an ottoman in there I watch it online at home which is easier on me right now and not even leaving for that. Wear masks at doctors I do in person and try to do virtual if I can at all. Of course those pesky tests you do in person but they are all good about masking even. I do live somewhere people are respectful of those who want to mask and keep their distance. I have even some of the older people when I was in the cry room who come in not only with a mask but also wear those gloves as well. We also have sanitizer everywhere in there.
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Ohhhh @dancemom Would it impress you that I had near a million views on the threads I started on BCO before I left in early 2019. I was the girl next door. I left at the time b/c 6 friends had died in about 4 months. Not that others hadn't passed in previous years with a feeling of great loss, but these were all phone friends too. Several I whispered in their ears at death or close to death. Three since then, from here.
The reason for that kind of viewing is I didn't make it about myself. For example, this thread. There was a cat fight elsewhere. We needed a no holds barred area that we could let it all out. Hence, we are here now. I got the science thread going, where we all could post research stuff. I suggested the Spanish language arm, which I have no clue where that is now.
I did a thread on how to evaluate studies. Can't find it. Bummer. I now did at least a favorites saving of some mask studies, but that would have to placed in the science group. It takes a great deal of time to pull one of those together. Maybe.
I get your density concerns. Gobbers, lots and lots of gobbers. I tried to find the study that gave numbers on how protective masks were. I thought it was the Denmark study. But couldn't pull the info. Doesn't mean it's not there. Just means my persistence wasn't there. It could be that it wasn't the Denmark study, that my memory is connected too. But these are the numbers I remember. Cloth masks about 6%, Surgical masks about 11%, K95 the number was close too N95 which was around 45%. The key for me was N95's that are considered the best were near only 50%. But I could easily understand it without a study.
N95's were developed in the 2000's thereabouts. Whether it had to do with SARS 2003- dunno. What happened through OSHA was that all hospital personnel had to be fit tested for the N95. The tester had to be qualified by going through a course. It was a hood placed over your head resting on the shoulders, then scent testing. The size of the mask was based on your ability to sense the smell of the testing agent. I'm particularly, sensitive to this info as I did not clear the fit test for even the smallest mask. My nose isn't weird, it's just small. Face appropriate. What was horrible and was a breach of federal regulations is the tester marked me okay for the small mask. Should I have contacted OSHA, the bosses, etc. The testing okay'ed us to work with respiratory illness like TB. Sars wasn't mentioned. I left there shortly after, perhaps I should have reported it, but now ancient history.
Here we are now. The public has been led to believe that N95's are the gold standard. Obviously, the best. But fit testing isn't talked of or done with the public. You perhaps, go on the subway and think a blue surgical mask is doing you good. 11% is good? N95 around 50% is good. It's a false narrative.
We all here have a greater risk factor. How we managed itis different based on our choices. I choose no vax . next post. :)2 -
I wasn't covid antivax initially. I was anti-new drug. I started in 1969 as an aide. Nursing school in 1971. The first week of nursing school they required updates on vaccines. I talked my way out of smallpox update b/c of data. The polio vaccine they said I either take it or drop out of school. I had polio in 1952. Well documented. I got horribly sick, missed a week. Not sure how many days into it, I asked for the PDR. Black box warning—NOT to be given to a patient that had polio. There was a kerfuffle about that for sure. Not sure if it changed things as my twin and I life long had many of the same post polio complaints. Early, in the 1970's I learned there was a lack on doc's and nurse part of carefulness with drugs. I became a stalwart of understanding drugs. Particularly, when it came to me.
Around 1999 when Celebrex was the new wonder drug. I lost my chiropractor. I thought it reasonable to seek a full-blown evaluation to see if Celebrex was a good drug for my musculoskeletal complaints. Neuro, Ortho, Rheumatology, GI. They all cleared me. Ended up with a colon resection. I had researched it on the internet and the Black Box warning never presented itself. But as I was going through the colon fiasco, I looked again to the BOOK PDR. Seared into my memory "Not to be used with a history of diverticulosis, diverticulitis, has been known to cause spontaneous colon rupture". I had a history of diverticulosis with a hospital admission. None of the doc's, even the GI doc, put the history together with the drug.
My advice to patients was always, consider waiting a couple three years when a new drug comes out to see what the aftermarket reports showed. I got caught by Celebrex. THEN we went on to the Aromatase inhibitors. I still remember the video of the U of M lead researcher saying "We never had the reports of musculoskeletal pain in our clinical studies, that we are hearing about now. We are going to have to look at that." The early days here about the reports were clear. Horrible. Docs denying that the pain was real. Then the denial of pain medicine.
By the time it came to taking the covid vax, I had the same attitude. Watch and see. New drug mRNA. All new novel(redundant) drugs have the potential to cause harm. The attitude was based on injuries to myself and innumerable patients by drugs. Watch and see.
Even though I had most of the risk factors: Hypertension, Obesity, Cancer history (BC 2008-9 and Thyroid cancer 2014, and nose cancer 2020) I was willing to not take the vax. Just b/c of my history of drug weirdness and history. My twin just died June 24 2023. She took two doses. Did that have an impact. Dunno. Will never know. She had a very serious history last 10 years. But also, a BC history that she survived from1996 with extreme lymphedema and liver loss due to alcohol.
So we each bring our own baggage to any conversation.
Did I get Covid? Yes, I did. July 4th 2022. Five of us shared a joint. We all were sick. Survived it. I know I will be lambasted for my statement that it was an interesting experience. But everything I experience apart of me evaluates what is going happening. My guess when I die I will be saying the same thing.
The interesting things were the first five days were predictable based on the written info. My experience was that there were three body places that were particularly affected: 1 Trauma to a calf in 1993, that area I've had to always watch b/c of compartment syndrome i.e a bleed into a muscle space that is contained b/c of the connective tissue that surrounds the muscle. It's been trouble spot for years, mostlly healed, but would get iffy at times. It was as if a gremlin was prodding it aggressively. Management for changes in the past was Aspirin. I took aspirin. The 2nd was the left Achilles, that was aggressively attacked. It had been a problem with a "something variant of eczema a year or so previous. Same gremlin attack. What still worries me is the brain. The feeling was the same gremlins popped all over my brain.
SOOO, the question is: Since there were two known areas with past histories of tissue trauma, what did it mean that the same sensing of the gremlin attack mean about the brain. Oh yeah, history of a brain tumor. So, previous tumor and crani. The gremlin attack at each site was something that had multiple appendages that was grabbing and attempting to pierce. Jumping as if to break something, That was my sense of it. The attack on the brain was the hardest. But my sense of it was that it was repelled.
Then the respiratory thing at the 5 day mark. lasted approximately 5 days with another week or so of recovery.
Dunno now why the story. It just kept flowing. Perhaps, I've come back b/c my twin has died. Hmm yeah. It sucks. The positive is she died on my wedding anniversary. So, my husband who was dx'd with lymphoma 3 months behind my BC dx and died in 2010 and her will always be remembered together. Even when she was progressing in dying, on the 20th of June I thought could she make it to the june24th. She did. I told my brother to whisper to her to come see me when she left. I prayed for my Greg to met here and all the relatives. She died early the 24th. The next day a thing that had been on the wall for 30 years fell with great force on the floor. The doorbell cover. "Okay you are here :)" but no other sense after that.
Do I feel better that I've written this. hmmyes and no. Mostly I miss her2 -
Sas-Schatzi-Sorry for the loss of your twin. Must be very strange now to have part of you gone. Glad she was able to "visit" you. Thanks for the discussion on masks and vaccines. I also worked in hospitals and have been fitted for N-95 masks. The proper fit was extremely tight and uncomfortable to protect me. I never understood how people bought in to cloth masks protecting us from a microscopic virus.
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Sas-Schatzi-Sorry for the loss of your twin. I am so sorry for your loss and know this has to be especially hard on you. Hugs to you.
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