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STEAM ROOM FOR ANGER

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  • sas-schatzi
    sas-schatzi Member Posts: 15,879
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    I have permission from TresJ to repost this. Hope I don't get banned. This is the most classic post I have seen. She followed up to say that it shut them up.

    5 hours ago , edited 5 hours ago by Tresjoli2

    I am on taxol and while my hair has thinned, and I cut it short...halfway through treatment I still have plenty of hair to not need to cover my head. If I get one more " but you still have hair" "or are you really on chemo I don't believe it" I'll scream. Ive resorted to running my fingers through my hair and dropping a chunk in front of the persons face to get them to shut up.


  • Smaarty
    Smaarty Member Posts: 2,618
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    mini, try one of these, Bali Women's Comfort Revolution Wirefree Bra. Amazon has them for half off from Kohls prices. Has back hooks, very comfy and keep the girls firmly in place. I get the x-large, I'm basically a c cup, 34 rib cage. (I think there's a wire version too)

  • queenmomcat
    queenmomcat Member Posts: 2,020
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    Bleep: sports bra sizing. I'm a 40 band, and gave up on finding anything more supportive than the shelf bra in my swimsuit years ago. I predict a multi-paragraph fulmination about bras coming up when I start radiation

  • ddfair
    ddfair Member Posts: 65
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    Sas,

    Is it ok to vomit in the steam room ?Because my coworker is about to make me puke !

    De

  • sas-schatzi
    sas-schatzi Member Posts: 15,879
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    De let me get the bucket. What did she do?

  • meow13
    meow13 Member Posts: 1,363
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    you can use the pink puke bucket a friend of mine gave me.

  • justmaximom15
    justmaximom15 Member Posts: 89
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    sas-schatzi

    Sorry for such a delay in response. My after chemo weekends are pretty much spent doing nothing and napping all weekend. I should have said MMJ - Medical Marijuana. Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against it but it really irritates me for someone who isn't going through this to insinuate that if they got the diagnosis they would refuse all conventional treatment and move to a MMJ state.

    As for the COBRA info, yes please share and I'll be happy to answer any questions.

  • sas-schatzi
    sas-schatzi Member Posts: 15,879
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    Thanks, JMM LOL Look at your initials

  • ddfair
    ddfair Member Posts: 65
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    OK ladies get your pink puke buckets ready, we don't want to make a mess in the steam room.

    To my attention whore coworker who had a NON CANCEROUS tumor removed: 

    Do you really think the entire staff needs weekly email updates on your progress?

    Have you ever heard of using private email for personal stuff instead our office email system? Especially since you are also posting multiple times everyday on Facebook.

    Did you forget that we have a coworker who has been dealing with serious cancer for over a year now?

    Did you forget that we have coworkers with family members with stage4 cancer?

    Wasn't it enough that we had a bake sale for you?

    Wasn't it enough that we took dinners to your family?

    Did you notice that our coworker fighting cancer doesn't have to be the center of attention every day?

    Has it ever occurred to you that you are NOT the center of the universe? 

     

     

     

  • sas-schatzi
    sas-schatzi Member Posts: 15,879
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    What does Human Resources say about this?

  • YJ2012
    YJ2012 Member Posts: 12
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    My rant today is I feel disconnected from everything . Yet I have always these deadlines to meet, clients to please to have pay check coming in Weeks are passing by and but I constantly feel I am stuck in a twlight zone. This diagnosis made me lose some close friends, as they were not up for supporting like a true friends should, so I am alone with no one to share my fears. I have to put brave face for family and friends and pretend that everything is OK. Sometimes I end up buying into everything is OK part as well , then it hits me nothing is OK , I am just a shell of person I use to be. However fake I realize my relations were , I want them back. I really don't know how to move forward with this new norm , I feel alone for most part..

  • farmerjo
    farmerjo Member Posts: 239
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    YJ2012 -

    Ditto here. I lost friends AND a sister when diagnosed. My sister...I cut her off because she handed me the scissors.

    I feel like a recluse. I am NOT the same person. I think it's more of a medication (letrozole) side effect because that's when it started.

    Everyone acts like it's ok but it's not. I tried to talk to my daughter about it and she automatically assumed I was depressed. I am not depressed; I'm just tired. I have periods of sadness, and that's normal under the circumstances.

    This is our new normal and NO ONE will understand unless they've gone thru it. It won't change and I have accepted that.

    I want to ask everyone how they would handle this situation: I have dealt with MANY "Did they get it all" comments, but how to handle a gesture? I was at lunch with a few co-workers and my manager asked how I was doing. I said that I needed a revision in the fall for fat-grafting and an exchange. As I said this I subconsciously placed my right hand at the TOP of my breast, by my collarbone. One of my co-workers looked at another and rolled her eyes. She doesn't know I saw. Now I won't acknowledge her when I see her. How would you handle this moving forward?

  • jjontario
    jjontario Member Posts: 156
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    A rant about Tamoxifen causing wicked pms that I'm afraid I'm driving my DH away but I'm so friggen angry that I went back to work and we are moving again on Saturday...with a house DH loves. He is so really inconsiderate and I'm so really tired of following his plans. Who the frig puts their house up for sale while your wife is in the middle of radiation. I'm tired of looking good and people saying that you don't look tired. I'm tired of being stressed and wondering in that tiny corner of my mind if the constant craziness of the past 2yrs somehow brought this on? However irrational that might be....I'm sick of what the past year has done to me and to some degree my marriage. How can anyone call this just a bump?

  • kittysister
    kittysister Member Posts: 88
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    Turn up the heat and pass the pink puke bucket, please .. to my facebook friend who was freaked out that you might possibly have a lump that would require a big surgery and you didn't know what you would do, how you would handle it, etc. etc. etc. post after post .. guess what .. your mammogram was clear and you didn't have to even have scans, biopsies or anything else .. which, I am happy for you .. really .. but I wish you wouldn't keep posting the pink ribbon pictures and "liking" everything about BC that comes your way. You really are over-doing it, especially since you don't know squat about it. I can't (not) wait for October. I may have to stay off of facebook that month. Maybe the pink ribbon is pretty and cute to you, since you were free and clear, but not to me .. I find it offensive. Yeah.

    I too feel isolated .. maybe it's partly because of people like you .. and I am tired .. so tired. What I wouldn't give for a good day when I don't hurt anywhere or always have the C word on my mind. I want to be normal again, so much. I want my energy back. I want to go, do, be me again. And even if I can't have all of my energy back, I would at least like to have SOME energy. This is for the birds!

    To whichever medical professional told me ( can't remember which, I've seen so many ) told me I may have cracked ribs in the future because of rads, I think you may be on to something there. I haven't gotten a cracked dx yet, but they sure by God ache like crazy and it's getting impossible to stand wearing even a stretchy bra for over a couple of hours.

    Speaking of bras .. who in the world decided that they all have to be so hot and full of spandex now .. that's what hurts my ribs. Yes, I've bought bigger sizes, but as my breast swells during the day, they end up too tight anyway, right along my scar line and ribs. And they roll up at the bottom .. what the heck is that all about. And .. who decides which is an XL and which is a 1X .. I've compared them by holding them together and there really isn't much difference in the size as far as the width at the bottom. Wearing a wire bra like I used to is out of the question and I have to have stretchy because of the swelling. The Genie ones won't do for me. They may have worked out when I was 20. What's a well endowed girl like me to do!




  • meow13
    meow13 Member Posts: 1,363
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    Have you tried the coobie bra? I find I like them but the one size doesn't always fit.

    I am ready to scream over my ear ringing today. I thought stopping the exemestane would help but it didn't. I love to have a good day with no pain and irritating ringing.

    Pink puke bucket ready.

    image

  • kittysister
    kittysister Member Posts: 88
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    No, I haven't tried the Coobie one. I've tried Bali and some of the cheaper ones at WalMart. The pink bucket is very fitting!

  • sas-schatzi
    sas-schatzi Member Posts: 15,879
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    Look in the topic box. it's perfect     Thank you Meow :) sassy

  • tangandchris
    tangandchris Member Posts: 934
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    Jilly-to your co-worker that rolled her eyes...I'm so angry about this for you!! I have gotten a vibe from some of my co-workers that they are rolling their eyes at me too and while I think at times I'm too sensitive, I wouldn't be surprised if they were. ugggg I hate mean girls at any age.

  • kittysister
    kittysister Member Posts: 88
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    Jilly, I'm guessing it isn't you .. it's them. Those that have never had BC or weren't close to a loved one who had it can never understand.

    SAS .. I noticed!

  • kittysister
    kittysister Member Posts: 88
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    Tang, same as your circumstances, too. I never cared for eye rolls anyway.

    Scared

  • shorfi
    shorfi Member Posts: 437
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    I am sitting at my desk, so drained emotionally because of this cancer crap. Had it twice in 2004 and 2013. Second time diagnosed with triple negative breast cancer. Now I am really living on the edge. Everyone thinks it's over, but I sit here waiting for the other shoe to drop. I am fat, tired and suffer from severe spinal stenosis, which leaves me helpless because I can no longer walk about like I used to. I am only 60 years old...at least that is not too old, but my quality of life sucks. I am tired of smiling and reassuring others that I am fine. I want to scream and cry until somebody understands me. I want to be "normal" again!!! Those days are over. Every ache and pain I get I swear it's coming back AGAIN. I am so tired of living like this. I do have good times, but in the back of my mind I am afraid.

    Wish I could wake up and not feel any pain, tight breasts like a million rubber bands are around my chest, fat as ever. I have never been this heavy in all my life. I eat junk food, and it satisfies me for the moment, then I feel like crying afterwards. I am so sick and tired of being sick and tired. I wish the old me were back SickTiredAnd to put the icing on the cake, now I have a mild case of lymphedema. I'm DONE :(

  • letranger
    letranger Member Posts: 166
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    Ok. here I go. I'm new, but this steam has built up and I'm ready to vent. Only 2 and a half years ago I was enjoying being a new mom, excelling at my job, and just loving life. A month after my 40th bday I get a f@53d! up gift called breast cancer. I don't usually swear but this steam room seems to bring it out in me!!! Anyways, how is this fair?!?!?! I lose my breasts - Okay take them both - I lose my hair, I lose my self-confidence, I lose ME!!!!!!!!!! But more importantly, I lose TIME with my only child. The one I waited for years! Seriously, already broke up with God, how many times are we going to break up. Losing faith. Losing hope. Oh, did I mention I also have brain mets! Really, I don't just need one, give me 11 lesions!!!! I just want to be with my son and watch him grow up! He's only 4! He needs me! Our children need US! I'm not asking to win the freaking lottery. An average life is all I ever wanted. All I think about is his life without me. Ok, tears flowing. Signing off.

    (BTW thank you to the person who created this room.)

  • SuzyBlue
    SuzyBlue Member Posts: 84
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    letranger, I'm so sorry that you are having to go through this, there is nothing I can say that will make you feel better, the truth is it sucks! Life has dealt you and your son a crappy deal. You are not alone, we are all here to help and support you. Feel free to come here to let loose those emotions that other people may not understand as well as we do. Big hugs to you

  • Beachbum1023
    Beachbum1023 Member Posts: 364
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    Shingles anyone? I scheduled my appointment to get the vaccine just in case. Two weeks before that appointment, I end up in the ER with shingles. Yikes! Sucked big time, and the pain is unreal. No joke. And I have the uncommon side effects from it, my whole side is numb. Nice but at least the whole damn side is numb now, it just connects to my chest wall and armpit. Barf..............


    My MO insisted on the flu vaccine, insisted on the pneumonia vaccine, insisted on the updated tetanus vaccine. So if BC patients are high risk for shingles, why didn't she ever mention it, or insist on the shingles vaccine?? WTF? I found it on Google..................but shingles found me first. Ask your MO about this sucky side effect, you don't want it! And the good news, I can't have the vaccine for at least 12 months since it is live and I have a compromised immune system. Bite me!


    NO END IN SIGHT, EVER! SO THIS IS OUR NEW NORMAL, IT BLOWS!

  • Jennie93
    Jennie93 Member Posts: 263
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    shorfi, letranger, and Beachbum, I have tears in my eyes right now for all of you, all of us. It just sucks, it's not fair, and life just doesn't seem worth the effort sometimes. Somehow we keep on keepin on, but it's so hard. Vent all you want, this is the place. Maybe there's nothing we can do to help but we all understand, we get it, we are crying and screaming along with you.



  • mebmarj
    mebmarj Member Posts: 143
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    It's been a while, thanks for the steam room, I really need to purge.

    To all the people who told me at age 32- "you're too young, I'm sure it's nothing"- and then it wasn't, nice big junk punch for you and that's been since 2003 so they'll not see it coming.

    To all the people in 2011 who said, after a new dx at age 39, BMX and hyst- "now you can get some free big ones"- my friends and I here would love to wrap your torso in Saran Wrap, then duct tape it thoroughly and see how comfortably sexy you are feeling tight, short of breath at times, without your nipples or ability to feel your SO's touch. (Saving post hyst and on AIs undercarriage conversation for another time.)

    To the people who said "did they get it all?"- please feel free to check. Oh does that make YOU uncomfortable? Huh, well better check yourself then. Because NO IT DOES NOT RUN IN MY FAMILY!!!

    Had some surgery last week to correct symmastia and muscle damage, so I'm just a bit cranky with shingles as an added bonus right now. But my most favorite dumb comment lately is, wait this is a good one and I have to set it up. So I'm in outpatient recovery, dosed with dilaudid- can't keep eyes open longer than 10 seconds, haven't urinated either and the nurse keeps asking me, "do you think you're ready to go home yet?" To you sweetheart, I would love to see your eye dr and tell him to see you quick, cause honey you must need some new glasses.

    I have a very short wick these days. Have to see a new onc soon and that has me just thrilled as well.

    Pass me another towel please?

  • letranger
    letranger Member Posts: 166
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    thanks suzyblue and jenny93! I feel better today. Maybe I really needed to blow off some stream! It worked!

  • PoppyK
    PoppyK Member Posts: 1,275
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    I used to be fearless, now I know what fear truly is.

    When my babies were born, I prayed to God for my babies. The only thing I asked for myself was that God allow me to raise them, be with them until they grew up. My first thought when diagnosed with BC was that God was going to let me see my boys grow up, but then the cancer would kill me. I still think this. My youngest is only 12.

    To the frickin' eye rolling mean girls: So sorry our disease is inconvenient for you! Your reaction says a lot about your character.

    If I see anyone rolling their eyes about me, I call them on it. In front of anyone. I say in a voice loud enough for all who saw the eye roll to hear, "Why did you roll your eyes in response to my comment?" I want them to know I am aware. If you are tired of hearing about it, I'm even more tired of living with it.

  • shorfi
    shorfi Member Posts: 437
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    PoppyK...I well know about the eyes rolling. My two so-called girlfriends. We went out to dinner one night and as I was telling my experience I saw one of their eyes roll, and they started to kick each other under the table. And I PAID FOR THEIR DINNER. That spoke volumes to me and needless to say, we are not as close as we once were. I guess my disease was inconvenient for them too. But I wish I had the guts to call them on it. Oh well, better off without them.

    Hoping I get some relief for my spinal stenosis tomorrow.


  • letranger
    letranger Member Posts: 166
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    if you don't mind, I'd like to kick them under the table (hard!)