January 2017 Surgery Group
Comments
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Hey everyone--sorry I've been missing in action. Got through my surgery and am now dealing with weekly fills in my left TE. I am done--they have one more fill to do next week (which will be the overfill) and so my size is fitting a nice B cup (350cc). The surgeon called today to schedule my implants on may 30th. When I get my implant on the left, they will augment and lift my right breast as well. I cannot wait until this hard, uncomfortable TE is OUT of my body. Hurts now that it is pretty large.
Has anyone had a switch from TE to implants yet?
I've been having quite a few hot flashes on the tamoxifen. And extreme dry mouth and skin. I go back to mo in May to check in. Since my cancer was mostly DCIS and very limited invasive, I wonder if it's even worth taking it for 5 years. And I have a few more months before my period will be gone for a year so maybe I can get them to switch me over to the post-menopausal medication.Glad to see everyone is doing ok--thoughts are with you!
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Darling babies!!! Love the pictures Vargadoll!
Happy 44th Fightingirl!! Good to hear you are doing well and staying on track w/new diet.
PugsMama, I am glad you don't mind the saline, its not too terrible!
Leftocoastie, I am praying you can ditch the vac on the 4th!! I am not fond of the TEs either! It is weird feeling when I try to squeeze by someone and my rock hard chest almost knocks them over!! Hang in there!!
3Bears, I hope the PT helps, I am sure it will!
Flabby arms....hah, I am flabby everywhere!! Got to get moving!!!Pyrrh, congrats on feeling NORMAL!! I have definitely had some days where I don't think about it. I see the light at the end of the tunnel, and I am so glad we all seem to be handling all of this so well!! My daughter gave me a bracelet 2 years ago with a little charm on it that says "It's not about the journy, it's about the destination". Little did I know what kind of a journey life had in store for me!! I am starting to gain a lot of inspiration from all my bc sisters though, and know this fight is toughening me up. Here is to whooping cancer!!!
Annoyingboob, I love the motivation you give to get started exercising! I really do need to do more than I am currently. I haven't wanted to put forth the effort only to have to stop when I have my exchange. I don't know if I read it on this thread, if so, just disregard. But a young girl Paige who underwent PBMX due to BRCA1 has an awesome Instagram journey. She just started posting an exercise regimen with nutrition tips to get her back in fighting shape for her exchange. It is a 90 day challenge.
Paige_previvor to anyone who didn't see it. I think its fun to follow along and live a bit vicariously through this young woman, she looks to be half my age or more! The most I have done is just bodyweight squats. I really feel squishy all over except my turtle shell chest!!
I just got my new exchange date today. The PS (thankfully) had a cancellation so instead of May 4, I go April 25. I am so excited!!
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I've been checking in but not commenting lately- busy - but still crave the connection to y'all. I just got a re- beginner fill on my radiated/nipple USA loss side, which I really appreciate for the sake of heading toward symmetry. I've found bra top camisoles from uniqlo to be comfortable and helpful for creating a more normal look to my current irregular lumpies. They wash well, too. (Sometimes I get a little weirded out about my cadaver tissue lumpy bits but I know it will be good eventually...)
Varga- the babes! So adorable! I know you are loving watching those little siblings interact. It totally melts your heart, doesn't it?
3bears- arms! You're so right about the warm weather and showing arms that used to have some definition but not so much right now. I still haven't seen PT but am adding more to whatever it is I'm doing to stretch and regain 😫
Pugsm- I hope you continue to be happier with saline now that you see it's not too weird!
Leftcoastie- the queen of vacs!You've been carrying on life while having your own personal carry-on!
Annoyingb- my ❤️ on a boob shirtbenefactor and continued inspiration. Thanks for the exercise suggestions!
This is the place (all the threads I've followed) for true strong, no nonsense, get it done women who can make you laugh at just about any point in this journey. Love to you all!
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Aaah 3bears . Sorry you had a dark day . I am sending good healing vibes your way . It is never easy , I am sure , but you are plowing toward the finish line. In that lies a beautiful bc-less future. I workout at home as well . I have the total gym fit machine . I also have a treadmill , stationary bike and a punching bag with gloves. I workout for about 45 mins a day . I too, will never take my health for granted again after all is said and done. ❌⭕️
Leftcoastie thank you for thinking of us all in your post . I miss everyone so much .
Happy Belated Fightingirl . Hope you had a blast🎂
Annoyingboob .. keep the laughs a coming . You always crack me up . It is so refreshing when you are here. 💗❤
Yes Prryh cancer talk does bug me too. I used to be so scared of the thought, but having been through this has given me so much hope , I never knew there was. I was like the others , scared as hell of cancer! I am so grateful for the treatments and my medical team and have a new outlook on the topic now! I am on tamoxifen too . Still hoping for minimal SE's .
Oh Vargadoll,
Those babies are so precious. Thank you for sharing the pics with us .
Goodnight ladies .. thinking about each and everyone one of the January surgery girls always . Love you all
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almost forgot - HAPPY BIRTHDAY FIGHTINGIRL!!!!! how great to put CA in the rear view mirror of 43 - later, 43, you sucked!!! cheers to 44 and all the healthy ones to follow!!
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annoyingboob - I have just completed my second bottle of tamoxifen. It seems things take more effort these days and I feel drained. I get frustrated and then emotional, I am going to ask my MO what she thinks the reduction in my reoccurrence risk is on tamox versus not.
I will need to stop for my exchange surgery in about 2 months so that should help me better determine what SEs I am having are from the tamox and which are just because of what my mind and body are going through.
I have a lot of muscle issues that started in my back after my TEs were filled, I hope that gets better with exchange.
I feel worn out…much more emotional….I am back to work too so I have that added stress.
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I had my last fill today!!! I now just have to wait 6-8 weeks for the exchange surgery.
It feels great to finish this step!!!
My doctor said waiting 8 weeks might let things settle more, he had originally said 6 weeks, but i think I prefer waiting 8.
A break might be a good thing and I can continue to focus on addressing my cording issues before surgery.
Hope all of you are doing well.
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Congratulations farmdream! It has to feel good to be finished with this part of your journey.
I have been on tamoxifen for over 2 weeks and haven't noticed any SE. I finally got the call for my radiation. I go Thursday for my dry run then I assume the real deal starts in Friday. I have had my markers in place for 2 weeks! I have done a pretty good job keeping all but one in place
We took the kids to Dollywood yesterday and I was so tired! I had a little bit of a belly ache but thought it was because I had fell of the wagon and had cake the night before. Well, this morning grandson has a major stomach bug and is blowing from both ends! I haven't done a sick kid in years! Waiting on a prescription of Zofran to be delivered now!
Hope all you other Jan/Feb girls are hanging in there!
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Anoyingboob - I do recall seeming sluggish (with heavy legs) the first week or so back trying to train; I pushed through it over Spring Break by doing a personal practice session each day and building up my endurance. The last few weeks I have felt pretty normal (other than out of shape, which I am working on).
My 30 day Tamoxifen followup was late last week. The doctor kept asking me about SE's and I kept saying no. Eventually she asked "are you taking the pills?" and I laughed. Haven't missed a one. I guess she's more of the type who expects the worst, while I am pretty much the opposite. I did tell her that the minute the SE's start showing up she and I would have a serious conversation where she'd have to really charm me into continuing. She told me that normally the SE's start up in the first 30 days. I am hoping she is right about that!
My mom asked about hot flashes, I told her I woke up one night and was hot ... but the next morning confirmed with my husband that it was actually just hot. Mom told me that I'd 100% know if it was a hot flash. So I guess that part will hold off until I hit actual menopause...
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thanks pyrrh!! I had my period last week which I think added to the heavy feeling, plus I felt like my uterus grew up to my diaphragm, lol. feeling better this week and had a really good/hard pilates class today. the silver lining is that period only lasted 3-4 days, whereas normally I am a solid 7 days, so yay!! (tmi?) im trying to power through and forget im taking this thing, but like you, when you notice symptoms, its hard to know what to ascribe it to - pill, brain, or something real? who knows... I do get some night sweats and my cuticles are so crazy dry and cracking. I just need to pay more attention to lubing up, lol. I think the trick is lots of exercise and drinking tons of water, so im just doing my best to get out and about - extra long dog walks and more pilates and trying to do the weights at home.
mind over matter - we can do this!!! I have my 30day mo followup later this week, so ill pop in with any words of wisdom from him!!
xxoo
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annoyingboob - I have felt like my hair is getting dry ends. I have always had thick shiny hair and I have been wondering if it's the tamoxifen making this change. When I read your post about having dry skin I doubled up on my lotion! (Thanks!) I always drink alot of water I have been super slack on getting back to exercising. The new grandbaby and my mom staying sick with upper respiratory illnesses then my Dad got the flu. ( he's NEVER sick) has taken up what time I would have to exercise. I start the rad train this Thursday for my long ride of 6 weeks. ALLLLLL ABOARD!!!
I am starting to get a few medical bills rolling in and have been surprised twith the amount I owe. I guess I was expecting to have to do a second mortgage to cover them but right now they seem doable. I won't be buying many new shoes this summer and we probably won't get to do our big beach trip. This will be the summer for a staycation.
Have a beautiful day!
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Hi , Glad to hear everyone is doing well . I don't have a 30 day follow up. Mine is scheduled at 90 . I wonder if that is ok! I do have a radiation follow up exactly a month to the day of completion. I do get the hot flashes and also a feeling of tingling in the nips like when I used to ovulate . Those are basically the two things that seem to stand out with me on the tamox.
I am execising everyday with weight , punching bag and some cardio on treadmill and bike . I need to up the water intake. I know it is good for us.
The fatigue has dissipated, boy I am glad about that. It was very debilitating to me! If I keep busy , I seem fine .
Take care ladies ❌⭕️❌
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Annoyingboob----You make Tamoxifen sound so wonderful! lol!! I am not going to like tamoxifen at all if that's what it's going to do to me. I ageee..... you do have to ask yourself if losing weight wouldn't be better than some pill that makes you gain weight and not be able to be as active as you should. I don't know about this.....................
Pyrhh---You had an oncotype of only 2?!!! Wow!! I had a 32. Which was my ticket to the chemo train. You are so lucky!!
I'm feeling good. I just went through my closet trying on shirts to see if I'll be able to wear them with a mastectomy bra this spring and summer. I found a handful anyway. Does anyone know what I'll be wearing after I have my TE surgery? A post surgery camisole again? Do you wear breast forms AND TEs at the same time? Or do I just have to look small for awhile until I get fully inflated ? These are the things I'm thinking about now. It is a lot more fun than chemo. 😃 It's a good thing us girls haven't lost our sense of humor , right?
Vargadoll-- your grand baby is precious !!
Life is good!! We are strong!!
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3Bears: you'll come out of surgery with probably an "A" cup. You'll probably have to wear a bra for a while. it won't take long for you to start getting the TEs filled, you probably won't use the breast forms. Hopefully you won't need any drains. You're right, this sure beats thinking about chemo!..I sent you a PM re: a pre-pec surgeon recommendation btw...
Glad to hear all you gals are doing well with rads, Tamoxifen & life in general
Love you all!
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Wow. I have missed a lot! I'll have to go back and read everything. I just did radiation #19 of 31. My energy is pretty good. It is actually helping my insomnia. I am starting to burn. I am a little jealous of those that didn't have nipples during radiation. That is what hurts the worst by far.
I'll post more once I have read everything everyone has been up to. Working and radiation every day and trying to find time for my horses has been about as much as I can do. Oh and my daughter changed her wedding to August. Was supposed to be December and my other daughter announced she was moving to Colorado in August. Don't they understand the not stressing your mother out during treatments. Lo
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Cowboy-Up I was thinking of you last week. We made it to my grandmother's farm in Ohio. It was great to see the horses even if I can't ride, love the smell of the barn. It reminds me of when I was a kid and all we did was ride. My mom used to yell for us a night to come in from the horses.
Congratulations on your daughters wedding
, even though she moved to August.I hope you can find some relief from the radiation burn.
Take care
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Hi to all... it is so good to continue hearing about how everyone is doing... and sending positive energy for continued transitions toward recovery for all of us!
Question to everyone: has anyone been experiencing panic attacks? I've had several over the course of the last two weeks. I was so in control through all the biopsies, diagnoses and surgeries... but I think the stress of it all is finally catching up to me. Initially it was a little bit of a relief (i.e., was a little worried that I hadn't responded more emotionally to the whole thing... this felt more normal) but now it is just a pain. Any thoughts or suggestions most appreciated. I have a call in to my primary care doc about upping my (currently low) dose of Lexipro... but feel like I need to get this in check.
XOXO Happy spring everyone.
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Dcbc: I had to up the brain meds too. I don't know if it's PTSD, cancer, chemo or whatever but all this BC BS has definitely taken a toll on my emotional state. I was thinking about this last nite. I was dxed on Dec 1, stressed before that of course waiting for the test results, resulting in 4 solid months of non-stop stress & anxiety...imho, it's totally understandable that our brains might need a little extra help in calming down the anxiety....xoxo.
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oh, pugs mama and dcbc, hang in there - it gets better!! i had some panic pop thru when i started xrt, but have had a solid month now free and clear of mind games! go up on meds if needed - i totally agree that you have plenty of reason to panic, but im here to say it gets better on the other side!! i went up to 10 mg of lexapro during all the chaos of surgery and xrt, but am now back down to 5mg, and may go off completely at some point. md says he likes to see people with no symptoms for at least 6 months before tapering off completely, so i have 5 more months to go.
i had a weird nipple thing develop - the non radiated, but lifted, nipple got white and painful - the areolar part on the lower inside. i was wondering if it could be some vasospasm or a little clot from the tamoxifen. I've been doing massage and hot compresses and stopped tamoxifen and popped an aspirin and its much better, but has me a little freaked out. just when i felt like i was coasting along and managing all the se like a champ. will see what the experts say - weird for it to just develop out of the blue after 3 months of doing well postop. drat. without seeing a pic, ps wondered if it may be a reaction to a stitch being resorbed - anyone else have any weird areolar changes (aside from bevmoms usa necrosis, lol) or tight stitches stories?
good luck on the last chemo round 3bears and pugs mama!! good luck with first xrt tomorrow vargadoll and hang in there cowboy! i am certainly feeling like i need a vacation and some pampering. stat!! the weather here is starting to get gorgeous and springlike - hope its the same for you east coasters. sigh of relief we did our surgery in the winter and could hibernate for a few months. now its time for spring renewal - bring it on!!!
xxxooo
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annoying - that's just plain crazy for the non radiated nipple to go funny on you - what you'd least expect!! Hope that little anomaly was just an overnighter and all better by tomorrow.
To Pugs, dcbd, and anyone else getting wacky;
The rant: It helps me to know others are having delayed reactions. Sometime I've wondered if I've just been too matter of fact and mostly-calm, too. I'm starting to remember that my mode is to do well in the moment and then have my reaction later and I think I'm coming into that phase. I feel like everyone around me is thinking that I'm all better except for exchange but I'm not better, I'm weird! Like I have a clothespin on the tip of my nose and no one sees it but me and I can't get away from it! It's like pregnancy- you can't step out of it to take a break, it's always with you
The positive:Thanks ladies, for continuing to share your feelings and experiences of all kinds. It really does make us stronger to know that in this saga -- we are not alone... (Oh dear, now I'm singing Michael Jackson ). (( and now some of you are, too😉))
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Annoyingboob - cancer, it just keeps giving! You had done so well I'm sad to read you had a nipple issue. Do you think you will start the tamoxifen again? I am have not noticed any SE. A few weird things are happening. I've lost weight and I'm not cold all the time.
It was spring here for a few days now cold again tonight and snow flurries tomorrow.
I'm exhausted! I will post tomorrow. So good to hear from all you girls ♡♡
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the nip pinked up a bit today, but still a bit painful - not excruciating, but noticeable discomfort. maybe it is just an internal suture getting degraded, bc its in an area that is sewn a bit tighter than the rest. who knows. but im going to hold off on the pill for a few weeks bc im flying to france soon and the last thing I want is a dvt or pulmonary embolism or a stroke from the flight or worrying about everything. ill discuss restarting with my mo on fri, and maybe ill give it another go once I land. frustrating, bc I really felt like I was starting to get in the groove and felt like I could handle the big T. stay tuned...
I feel you bevmom - I went through an initial postop euphoria - like yay, no more ginormous boobs, they will be smaller and perkier - thanks BC for the free lift! but now that ive been staring at my nipples for days, im realizing how the scars are so noticeable and im getting self conscious. I haven't seen my bf since before all of this and haven't even really said anything to him about cancer, so im dreading that whole first encounter. don't get me wrong, im thrilled to be disease free, but now the petty is kicking in. im sure we are all going through post op adjustments, so there is nothing special about it - just need to appreciate my new normal. AND I went to dinner with a platonic boy friend the other night who said all my symptoms were probably in my head. thank you, sir, for mansplaining my BC meds symptoms to me. im so mad about that comment, (even if its true, lol.) sooo glad I have you girls, my breasties, who really 'get it'.
glad you are doing so well varga!! good luck tomorrow for day 1!!! its a bit unnerving only bc its something new, but once you get in the groove, you will be fine!! bevmom, I see that clothespin on your nose and still think you are gorgeous, but damn you for getting michael jackson in my head!!
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Dcbc--I'm glad you brought this up. I have been amazed at how well I've done emotionally through all of this too. I keep thinking it's going to hit me eventually. But so far that hasn't happened. I have gotten myself worked up over so many much smaller things. It's strange how this hasn't phased me too much. I'm afraid that it is eventually going to hit me. When this is all done , I just want it all to be done. I suppose I am a bit afraid of the future. The word recurrance scares me.But I don't want to live in fear, just joy.
Vargadoll-- did you start tamoxifen ?
Annoyingboob--so sorry to hear about your trouble you are having. They don't know what's causing it? I hope it clears up soon.
I can't wait to graduate out of chemo! One week from Monday!
Pugsmama-- thank you for that link about the Pre pectoral TEs. I haven't read too much yet but I will. It does sound like a lot more Drs are doing this now. Thanks for the info on what to expect after TE surgery. An A cup? Sounds so small and yet that will be huge compared to the concave holes I have now!
Cowboy up-- sorry its hurting. So you're like 75% there! Yay!!
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3bears - yes I started the tamoxifen almost a month ago. No real side effects I'm sleeping fine, have actually lost a little weight and have had no hot flashes but at times I feel warm which is way out of the normal. I'm always cold. There's been a few times my chest has gotten hot and I can feel it creeping up my neck and I kind of get this oh hell no attitude! Then it stops LOL so happy that you are almost done with the chemo train! When that train hits the station there will be a celebration! !
I have felt fine up until this point. Nothing's really bothered me not even the SNB. All of a sudden I feel like I have a golf ball in my armpit my boob hurts and I think I've got some cording going on. Pretty sure it's a seroma. Thank goodness for the ladies on the lumpectomy Lounge thread they are a big help with things like this. This is the first time since surgery that I'm really tired and really don't even want to get dressed. I want to play the C card to get out of everything kind of hard to when nobody knows you have the C. I still have not told my parents or very many people. I called the cancer center last week's about my arm because I knew it was the start of cording. They never called me back. Their message States please do not leave multiple messages so I tried to respect that. I thought I would just wait till my appointment today with my RO and have her look at it. Now I'm sorry I wasn't a pain in the ass cuz it's hurting all the way up my shoulder!
Thanks for listening girls got to get busy got to deliver Meals on Wheels and get to my radiation appointment.
Have a cozy day! Cold with a chance of flurries here today.
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I love you ladies!! So nice to know my weirdness is normal
I'm setting an appointment with my doc asap, we'll get to the bottom of the anxiety. I totally agree that the whole silver lining of a lift and smaller boobs seems less silver these days... I'm feeling the disfigurement more than I thought I would. Of course, we MX girls are not fully through reconstruction yet, so perhaps the reality of scars, nipple absence and the like will fade over time... but I hear you on the feeling like you are the only one that sees that something is off... at some level, no matter the support, this is a solitary journey. It is so good to know you are all out there with a clear understanding of what I am talking about!!!Keep healing -- heads, hearts, and boobs!!! xoxox
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You know it's strange, I go about life lately as though nothing has happened. I've finished my neo-adjuvant chemo, had my double mastectomy, had my TE's filled every so often. Today I was driving home from work and my hand touched my port and I just lost it. I think it's ecause of me one of my co-workers will be fired tomorrow, the day I'm scheduled to get my Herceptin infusion. I suspect that she's stolen money from my purse twice this week and I had to report her to the office manager. My heart is broken and I just want to sit and cry and cry and cry.
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Docmama - (((((((Hug)))))) extra big hug for you! It's strange how BC just becomes the norm and then wham!! Something bumps it back into "this is not normal". I am thankful for this thread so we can all share these moments like this realize all the girls here understand.
Sending you peaceful vibes and love!
Teresa aka Vargadoll
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welp. No one knows why my nipple went nuts but it's fine now. MO doubts it's bc tamoxifen. He also said leg and elbow aches were unusual and seen more with arimidex. Said even if I lost 20# he would still want me on Tamoxifen.
I'm going to take a little break for the moment and think about resuming. The guilt of stopping it is HUGE!!
Varga, hope day 1 of rads went well. Docmama sorry about your coworker. Is next week the chemo finale for pugsmama and 3bears? Seems we need to have a bungalow party for that for sure!! Keep your mental game strong girls!! 3 solid months are Xed off the calendar. We got this!!!
Xxxooo
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3Bears' last treatment is April 17 & mine is April 19. Counting the days until we're off the chemo train!
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