My Husband, My Life, My Love, My Family, My Cancer

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  • micmel
    micmel Member Posts: 10,055

    Thank you Gracie Honey!!! My thighs are ok. I think I responded quickly enough to prevent it to be really bad. I appreciate the kind words about the style of the bra. I’m working hard on it. I would love to win. But I just feel happy to even do it. Hope you’re doing well this Monday. Hugs to you!! Much love ~M~

    Masons~Welcome to the thread. Hope all is well in your world...


  • Daniel86
    Daniel86 Member Posts: 207

    Just wanted to drop a quick hello to all of you gals! I see y'all are keeping strong through the hailstorm.

    Melissa, glad you are back ;)

    Minnie, what was your favourite place you visited?

    Mae, happy about your scans coming back stable!!

    Grannax, you go girl! Where was that? In Dallas? I remember you mentioning Canton but I doubt that's where it was hehe

    Have a good rest of day and week everyone!

    Daniel

  • masonsmawmaw
    masonsmawmaw Member Posts: 119

    I am bone mets only, but frequent this thread often. After 38 months of Ibrance/Faslodex, I apparently have progression in the form of lesions on ribs. I have searched for other threads on A/A, but can't seem to find much out there. This is what my onc wants me to start on as my second line. Just trying to find out what I can expect. Anyone have any suggestions on where I should look?

    Thanks to all of you wonderful men and women!

    MM

  • Daniel86
    Daniel86 Member Posts: 207

    Hey masonsmawmaw ,

    unfortunately the A/A 2013 thread seems to be the most recent one on the topic. Did your oncologist mention any other options?

    Btw, sorry about your progression.

  • illimae
    illimae Member Posts: 5,739

    DH and I had to put our last baby down today. Biggie was the oldest surviving member of the litter and 14 years is incredible for a bulldog. We are devastated but we have bourbon and a pack of cigarettes (former smokers), so we’ll be ok.

    Just FYI, I may not post of a few days. We like animals most than most people, so this is really hard.

    image

  • KatyK
    KatyK Member Posts: 206

    So sorry to hear that Illimae. It’s rough losing a pet, they do become family members. We haven’t had dogs in a while but I still remember the grief when they died. We have great memories of our four footed friends as I’m sure you do too. Take care, hugs and love to you

  • micmel
    micmel Member Posts: 10,055

    Daniel~Good to see you back.. How is your sweet Leslie doing? I remember you posting pics of your trip this summer and now it's fall already..my how time flies....welcome back as well...

    Masons~I don't usually google but try just googling the side effects of the medicine. Just to read about it, if you can't find any information. I hope someone has experience with it will come along for you!

    Mae~ oh Mae... not Biggie... I know how you love that sweet guy as a child. I am so sorry. He was the cutest bulldog I've ever seen. I know he is your buddy and i am truly saddened that you had to do this. I am sure I won't be too far behind with our old man Tag. I know this isn't easy for you... I'm sorry my friend... love you Mae!

    Much love ~M~

  • Daniel86
    Daniel86 Member Posts: 207

    Melissa, after a few weeks of extreme pain from her surgery, Leslie is now getting out and about and she is pretty upbeat, everything considered. She just finished her 4th cycle of Ibrance tonight, so she is looking forward to her off week. Thankfully she dodged a bad cold both me and my son caught last week! It's hard to tell a 7yo to stay away from mommy and not kiss her and hug her at all hehe, so the risk was there.

    Mae, really sorry about your doggie. My wife's dog was shot when she was in high school and she has never really recovered from the loss. I feel for y'all and I hope y'all can find some solace with time.

  • Minnie31
    Minnie31 Member Posts: 494

    Daniel, I enjoyed Genoa, I suppose because it was easy for me to get around on my little mobility scooter. Palermo was a nightmare, no ramps anywhere. Cagliari was nice too, but surprisingly Citavechia, where everyone bypasses to get to Rome was really my favourite. Little quaint shops, coffee shops, just lovely. I will add some photos. I have had a horrible cold and just getting over it x. Love to Leslie xx

    Mae, sorry about your little man. Haven't had a dog for so long, but remember the pain when we lost the last one. X

  • GracieM2007
    GracieM2007 Member Posts: 1,255

    Mae, I’m so sorry for your loss! They really do become like our kids! Hugs!!

  • runor
    runor Member Posts: 1,615

    Big hug Illimae, raising a glass with you, in honour and remembrance of your dear dog. It is horrible.

  • Egads007
    Egads007 Member Posts: 474

    Micmel - how do I put my order in for that gorgeous bra?? ;))) Really beautiful work...bet it’s the winner

  • Lynnwood1960
    Lynnwood1960 Member Posts: 1,107
    Mae, my heart is breaking for your loss. As an animal lover I know how they are not our pets but our babies. It truly is a terrible loss. The grief is real and profound. I’ve cried more tears over some animals then over some people I know. A pets love is pure and unconditional, something not found in many people. Sending you a big hug.
  • micmel
    micmel Member Posts: 10,055

    Minnie~Hello lovely. Was wondering what your weather was like. Today it was like soup here. Just gross. I already can't wait for bed. I can't believe that Halloween is right around the corner. Where does time really go?

    Daniel~ very glad to hear Leslie is doing well. I have been on ibrance for 22 months. The fatigue is a bear. But I'm hoping against hope to have at least 22 more if I'm lucky. I don't want to give up my first line. Someone else mentioned being on ibrance for 38 months wow! Masons.. I believe it was. I'm also interested in affinator and aromiasin (spelling). I always look forward to my week off for sure! I did catch the miserable cold and it lingered. Just miserable! Poor young guy! Those colds can be messy when kids are around. I'm so glad she didn't get it. Changes of season always brings the dreaded cold. Good to see you. Our love to Leslie!

    Waving to you Gracie my girl!

    Mae ~💔 I am in your pocket for as long as you need. Like you said to me. We will be waiting my sweet friend. 🍾🥃 toasting to sweet Biggie. Love you!

    Waving hello to Runor..... hello sweety.

    Egads~Thank you so much for saying that to me. I love to create things and things and designs just pop into my head. It does resemble a Victoria secret bra I have been told several times. I have been getting an amazing response from it. Which makes me so happy. It isalways good to see you here. Always ! 💙💙🌷🌷 ~M~

  • micmel
    micmel Member Posts: 10,055

    Giving a shout out to KatyK. Welcome back. I agree with you that the dogs are like children. Except this child I have woke me up going to potty on his dog bed. Woke me out of a sound sleep, not the way I Am used to being woken up. Nasty! But I am back in bed. Good to see you here again. Welcome back

    Mae~ thinking of you. Hugs my friend and much love to you and your DH. I know it’s hard, not to mention just plains sucks. Hang in there. We adore you!
  • Minnie31
    Minnie31 Member Posts: 494

    Micmel, still warm and sunny here in Spain! Occasional cloud, we have had a few light showers, but still t shirt in the day.

    All good for me today, bloods fine, usual treatment, so that's me sorted for another 3 weeks. :

  • Lynne
    Lynne Member Posts: 368

    Mae-So sorry for you loss. Hugs!

    Sunny and 80 here today. It was cloudy and in the 50s yesterday. Got to love New Hampshire. Just wait a minute and the weather will change.

    I've got to start packing. Leaving Saturday for 2 weeks. I'll try to get back on here before I leave.

    Lynne

  • Grannax2
    Grannax2 Member Posts: 2,387

    The Fashion show was held at Fruntiers of Flight in Dallas A unique backdrop for photos Samina Mogul is the designer who is letting us be at her shows Say Yes to Hope models have been to two in NYC and two in Dallas SMGLOBAL should get you to pics and more info All of the models in our group have stage IV cancer with mets to liver Most are Colocancer survivors I think there are sixty of us now They do have a retreat in December that I plan to go to Its in Canton, two hours from me

    image

  • KatyK
    KatyK Member Posts: 206

    Hello Michel and others. Beautiful picture Grannax2. This post goes fast and hard to keep up! I’m doing o.k. Damn tumor markers went up again, waiting for a call back to see if significant enough to change treatment or stay the course. Ugh, I really hate cancer! Very rainy day today so good to stay inside and getting some house cleaning done. Having a family dinner here tonight and friends over tomorrow. All have a good day

  • GracieM2007
    GracieM2007 Member Posts: 1,255

    Grannax, the pictures of your family are great! Very pretty family and its wonderful that they were there to support you!

  • 50sgirl
    50sgirl Member Posts: 2,071

    Lynnwood, I hope that today's procedure went well and that you are resting at home now. The results should provide answers to the questions that have been out there for so long.

    Mae, I am sorry for your loss. I know that dogs become members of our families, and losing Biggie is painful to you.

    Grannax, You looked beautiful walking down the runway. I am so glad you decide to participate.

    Micmel, The bra looks lovely so far. I look forward to seeing it when you have finished. I hope you win.

    Lynne, Enjoy your vacation. Take lots of pictures and post them so we can all imagine what it is like to be relaxing on the beach. Happy anniversary.

    Hi to everyone else.

    Hugs and prayers from, Lynne



  • holmes13
    holmes13 Member Posts: 192

    Micmel I love the bra! You are so creative. I always can think up the ideas just am no good at the follow through (someone else has to execute).

    Mae- I'm sorry about your dog. He was a cutie!

    Grannax- You look great! Love that gown on you! Did you say you get to keep it?

    daniel- I'm glad Leslie was able to dodge the cold. I have been having sinus issues for a couple of weeks but I believe it's due to this crazy weather and the leaves changing.

    Lynnwood- you are in my prayers. I hope you get the answers to all of your questions.

  • micmel
    micmel Member Posts: 10,055

    Hi everyone.... I slept all day. Wanted to let Lynnwood know I was thinking about her all night. Cancer is so hard on our minds. I love you friend.

    KatyK~ those stubborn tumor markers drive anyone crazy. I just want to get off of this ride we all never bought a ticket too.

    The weather here has been crazy Minnie. Do you all experience seasons in Spain??

    . Like Lynne (Man) said. It changes way too quickly. Have a great time on your trip. You are always traveling. You’re my hero. With this crazy weather, up and down temps, No wonder everyone is sick with colds.

    Holmes~I am convinced that ibrance plays with our sinuses. I am always having sinus issues since I have been on this medicne starting around month number 5 or so, I am sure it’s gotta be a side effect. I just started my #22 round of it. Everytime I Pop a pill....I hope against hope it keeps working for me. For us all. Good to see you here!! Thank you for all the Bra mentions. It means a lot to me. I love having a project. It makes my mind healthy.

    Grannax~Your grandchildren are perfect. Your Granddaughter is turning into a little beauty. Wow is al I can say. You truly looked amazing. I am so happy you decided to strut your beautiful stuff on the cat walk! I love your choices for jewelry and dress. Vaaaavaaaavooom!

    Lynne (50’s)~Hello beautiful... always good to see you here. Thank you for the wishes of winning. It would be awesome to have it displayed in the cancer center show case. I started seeing a therapist yesterday for my sadness and my up and downs of emotions that I want to get control of. I hate cancer so much, I can never get over the sadness and victim feelings. I am hoping this will help. I also had my Effexor upped to 150 mg. I hate being sad all the time. ITs depressing for me and for others. But how do we combat it ?

    Much love to all ~M~

  • runor
    runor Member Posts: 1,615

    Micmel, you nailed it. The sadness. There is a sorrow, a mourning in my every day that never was here before. The burden of Knowing. Oh, I have happy moments and moments when I forget. BUt nights are hard. Hub goes to bed early and I rattle around this house alone. My thoughts come crowding in and by the time I go to bed most nights I am laid low by the Scary Things I Cannot Control. Describing this to anyone is impossible. When people ask me how I am I say I'm fine, because it would sound nuts to say I am so paralyzingly sad I can't breathe! And if you DID say that to someone they'd say, shocked, but aren't you doing well? Well, yes. I am. But no, I'm not. I LOOK well and I might in fact be well, but then again I might NOT be well, shit might be going wrong, there is a statistical likelihood that it is, I am not a survivor until the day I die of something else. So how am I? Trying really hard to fake it and realize that nothing is ever going to be the same. Mourning, grieving, that's how I am. Tense and scared. Battling. Daily. And yes, the light does find me, but it's not without moments of shadow. How do you explain that to someone? You can't.

  • micmel
    micmel Member Posts: 10,055

    Runor~ Sweetheart.... you just did.

    I understand every single word, feeling... emotion.... I am there in the shit stew with you. My friend. So you just did explain that to someone. Me. I am with you. Actually, I know already that the little suckers made their way to my spine. Having a calcium eating party are they? Perhaps. I am scared every month I get higher on my ibrance months. Is it this month it will stop working? It's a Terrible way to have to live. Even though the light may find us... it's a tinted shade of what it used to be. At least for me. Love you chickie! ~M~

  • tanya_djamila
    tanya_djamila Member Posts: 1,540

    Runor and Micmel

    I was thinking today how to explain it without feeling ungrateful for the time I’ve been given this far. I’m hopeful and fearful simultaneously. There’s dread in every appt, blood PET MRI, etc.

    Micmel yeah that month number part how many ibrance cocktails will work. There’s a new thread for Ibrance survivors over 24 months. Actually a new test result says that it will statistically give us 27.9 months.

    And Micmel yes the fear and dread of new treatments and new side effects when that time comes.

    Today in spite of the cancer cloud I took a nature walk with hubby. Had a coffee with him out in nature. Grilled us some steaks and will accompany him to a meeting this evening. I’m making appts for a flu shot next week an injection of steroids in my spine tomorrow to hopefully improve my mobility, protect me from flu germs.

    Just straddling the fence ladies.

    Micmel I hope the counseling sessions are helpful.

    Tanya

  • micmel
    micmel Member Posts: 10,055

    Tanya~ I agree that being greatful for the time we have is very true. I guess my sadness and anger come in because of my kids and my DH. I don't want them to suffer sadness. I don't want to miss a thing, wether it be babies coming from My DD, Or my son eventually finding his person. And marrying. (hopefully the bride will include me) then maybe more babies. I want to love these grand babies. I want them to know me. Those are the things that crush my soul, or someone else in my place with my DH in the rocking chair on that porch, that was supposed to be mine. Somedays I hope that once I go... that's it. I don't know anything, can understand anything and do not feel. Just cease to exsist. Then in the other hand I want to guide my kids and protect them if I am able. To watch them love and live. Happily I pray. It's just devastating having to live like this. But at least it’s living ! Much love ~M~

    Much love sweet woman! ~M~

  • 50sgirl
    50sgirl Member Posts: 2,071

    Micmel, I am happy to hear that you have decided to meet with a therapist to discuss your sadness. I hope that it helps to bring some brightness into your life. You deserve to find some freedom from the darkness that you sometimes feel. Although there are reasons for feeling as you do, I do hope that you can find the key to get past it. Mbc sucks big time, and we all know that the dark thoughts accompany the disease. Although we worry about how we affect the lives of our family members, it is important to remember that we are not responsible for the impactsince we have no control over it. The best we can do is try to find a way to cope with it and make it possible for us to enjoy the good things we still experience. It is easier said than done, of course.

    Hugs and prayers from, Lynne


  • micmel
    micmel Member Posts: 10,055

    thank you Lynne from the bottom of my heart. I hope it helps me too. I need to find a medium place for my heart... and my life going forward. Much love darling. ~M~

  • bigbhome
    bigbhome Member Posts: 721

    Mae, I'm so sorry for your loss. Biggie was such a cool guy! I feel your pain, we are still reeling from the loss of Cooper. Try to focus on the good times you had together, that is what we have been doing.

    Micmel, I am always in awe of creative people. I have 0 talent. Show me a financial statement and I will tell you how your company is doing and what changes need to be made to improve your bottom line. Give me a business plan and I can tweak it. You get the idea. Good luck with the contest and the therapist.

    Lynne, I'm sorry we didn't get to spend more time together. I can't wait to see pictures and hear all about your trip!

    Lynne, Lynne and MJ, Thank you for taking the time to meet with me! I feel so blessed to have had this experience! If any of you find your way to Florida, you are always welcome at our house. St Augustine is not far from here and its a great historical town!

    Minnie, I'm sorry your trip wasn't all that you hoped it would be. We have been gone for 12 days and it was rough. No more long driving trips for us! I'm hoping that we will still be able to go camping though.

    Lynnwood, hoping all is well.

    Grannax, stunning, beautiful and poised, you did us proud! Loved the pics!

    We came home to batten down the hatches for Michael! We followed Florida emergency services vehicles coming back home from North and South Carolina to help out here after Michael. Kind of weird. These people have got to be tired!

    Tanya, I hope the shots work!

    Waving hi to everyone!

    Hugs and prayers,

    Claudia