My Husband, My Life, My Love, My Family, My Cancer
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Oh damn, I got roll-called again, lol 😆 I’m here micmel, been taking care of DH this weekend, he’s having intestinal pain, so we’re off to the doc today. Been bingeing Mindhunter and Black Spot on Netflix, good so far.
Rabbit, sorry for the turmoil you’re in but please don’t be too hard on yourself about the past, you were in a different place then. Feel free to share as much as you like here, as often as you please, we look forward to it.
Gumdoctor, sounds like that guy might have been fun, I was all in at “free drink” lol.
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Obviously the brown one is Mae! Lmfao
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So accurate! 😂
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Love the gif Mel.
Not feeling like exercising much so randomly doing little bits of marching on the spot. Then housework, then to the laundromat. Exciting day all around for me. Might also join a skype laughter yoga class. I keep forgetting those for when I feel down. They make me happy even when fake laughing. Body does not know the difference and gives same endorphins as real laughter
Edited to add, neighbours might think I am watching a hilarious movie.
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Mara~ maybe you should watch a hilarious movie or show. Try watching “The Mick". On Hulu. It truly is hilarious. Every episode I laugh a lot out loud. I love it. I steamed through the three seasons like lightning. It was that enjoyable. For those HBO holders. Divorce. With Sarah Jessica Parker and Thomas Hayden church I believe his name is. Very funny. Very. Clever. Molly Shannon is also in it and is very funny as well. Enjoying it. Cruising through that three seasons as well. My problem is I get sad when it's over, so I watch like ten different things but can never bring. Myself to watch the last episode.
Dexter. Still have last episode to watch
Sopranos three left. So sad.
Divorce-three left. Noooo
Handmaids Tale~two left from season three. 🥺🙀
Next up season seven of orange is the new black! Again the last season. Ugh!
Thank goodness for good shows but damn I need more.
There was a new show on HBO this season called Euphoria, really good show. Zendaya ? (Spelling) is fantastic in it. Recommend it highly!! Well nap time. A sunny day outside. But too darn hot. My ds is home sick with aches and fever. I'm like uh stay away-but love you! Lol get away from me please. My counts Are down. But my markers were so good I'm thrilled. Usually they are how it is for me. Paints the picture and always has. Funny how they aren't reliable for some and are for others. Kinda like how treatments are effective for some and not others. Now that I think about it.. that pisses me off! Can't even figure my own body out. Argh!
Lol Mae~ you know I had to be honest lol
And hey is DH ok? I know you don't usually mention him not feeling well. He's another amazing person always on the move. You guys are the neatest couple. Just concerned. Is all.
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The movie that makes me laugh most is a Fish Called Wanda. Can't watch that movie without tears streaming down my cheeks.
The youtube video that makes me laugh alot is the Scottish Granny reading The Wonky Donkey. If you need a laugh the book itself is really funny and the grandmother is a lot of fun to watch trying to get through reading to her grandson
I am currently watching Queen of the South, So you think you can dance and Wonder Woman (with Linda Carter). The wonder woman episodes are cheesy by today's standards but a fond memory of childhood tv show.
I also enjoy It's Always sunny in Philiadelphia
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best show EVER on Netflix is Offspring!!!
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Radagast- You can come here anytime and voice your fears, concerns, anger, questions, etc. We are here for you.
Grannax- Hoping your chemo goes ok today and the docs can give you something to clear up the Port infection.
Gumdoctor- I would have laughed hysterically in that guys face. I am single, have always been single. And I certainly do not need a man NOW. With all that I have to deal with I would find his advancements hysterical. There is definitely nothing wrong with your looks. But I think you made the right decision going to sleep- "ALONE".
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I am also single, always have been. Just was not interested in relationships. Just had the occasional friends.
I always find it strange to be hit on because if they saw what was underneath the wig and my uniboob (did not want reconstruction) they would find that strange. I just wear a prosthetic. I don't have all of my hair, male pattern baldness instead due to brain radiation. i do look quite different with a wig, don't look as sick as I feel sometimes.
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Hahaha Mara. I have my real hair (for now) but thin in spots. And I too was bald before with the chemo. And I too have the uniboob and prosthetic. Gotta love it.
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Micmel, Mae, Gum doctor, candy, et el - thank you
Gumdoctor, I will try and take your advise and hang in there, just waiting for ovary removal consult appointment date with big wig cancer center...Info was sent Friday afternoon last week. If I don't hear by tomorrow, I'll follow up call and bug...politely of course. This progression has stirred up all kinds of emotions in me: regrets, wanting to reach out but not sure how, wanting to support but not knowing how, wanting to talk but maybe too much and learning when to zip it, not wanting to waste opportunities but also try and enjoy moments in the moment when my mind lets me. Your right, this is a learning curve for me, i'm getting my experience and earning flare. I'll try and let things ride out for a bit. Maybe get some treatment under my belt and see how I feel then. I think I saw that your blogging too, is this something I could follow?
Mara/Candy - I'm a uniboob too, have been comfortable walking around with one boob, no padding on other side...I tried once to wear a knitted knocker in its place, my hubby told me once to fix my boobs because I looked like a bleeding Picasso ie: Robin Hood Men in Tights. - kept dealing with traveling boob, or I looked lopsided because the padded side ended up looking bigger than the natural side. Ugh. I slap on a camisole these days under my shirts etc and let my lone gal flap free. I wear dresses or maxi dresses with a jean jacket in the spring/summer so my lopsidedness isn't usually seen unless I take the jacket off. And I've even grown comfortable with that too oddly.I watch alot of youtube stuff.....Man+River who finds stuff and returns things to people who lost things in different rivers around him. My Self Reliance, a guy who built a cabin from scratch out in the woods in canada, who is sorta making himself a homestead for him and his wife, adorable dog Cali a very loyal and sweet Golden is in alot of his videos, I watch some Good Mythical Morning Skits, not the super gross ones but the silly ones, I watch Nalie, a young woman about my age who has Metastatic Breast Cancer (mets to lung), just lots of little channels. About to start some older sitcoms I haven't seen before like the golden girls etc, and I love watching The Wonder Years on hulu. Sometimes I feel like an old soul in a young body, most of anything I like is before the year 2000 music or otherwise - much alot before then...LOTR and Hobbit have been exceptions movie wise. I'm a quiet gal with a hidden humor streak I let out when I let me guard down, have been known to have alittle fiest from time to time.
Look forward to getting to know you ladies
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Hi Rad Rabbit!
I love Nalie too. She's very beautiful and has amazing energy. I feel like the world is watching her journey with MBC. Seeing her helped me realize that there are young people with MBC who I could relate to. I was diagnosed on my 40th birthday and it just threw my life upside down.
Humor (both dark and light) more than welcome here!!!
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Rabbit, I started out with knitted knockers but found the same thing, without weights, they moved about even with a stone put in to weigh it down. I finally just visited a store to purchase the prosthetic and mastectomy bra.
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I also once was a free flier. I got used to it. But I ended up having the restoration done with my own fat. I was on that table for 13 hours. Roughest surgery. Even over my liver resection. But I am still slightly in even. I need need to reduce the other girl. But I'm pretty much sick of surgeries. Yeah no More please. I found my prosthetic to be heavy and hot! I waited and tried it. But. Decided for me I wanted to at least try. I hadn't had radiation so it went well with my skin. Thank goodness.
I have been looking at old pictures. I found a picture of my Deeohgee. As a puppy. Just like kids... they grow so fast. Had to share for a smile. !! 🥰🥰🥰
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First day of owning him ! 🥰😢😀😁😄💚 🐶 🐾 now he’s ten!!0 -
Mel, such a sweet looking dog. Handsome member of the family.
I never wear my prosthetic against my skin but instead slide it into the pocket of the mastectomy bra. It doesn't feel too bad there.
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omg I love your doggy! I think dogs are the best ever. cats not so much, sorry kitty people. I had a tram flap too. In 1995 - and they are totally uneven. I never really noticed until my grandkids saw me in the shower once and asked me why my doctor didn't make both my boobs the same size. What could I say. Originally they WERE they same size but after 24 years and a bit of weight gain they just didn't come out the same. Now it's in my chart that my boobs are not symmetrical. Harumph.
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uneven for sure. I’m afraid of my surgeon again. I don’t want to be on the table for that long again ever. The tubes. And drains are a pain in the ass. Like torture. So if anyone’s going through that and they are reading. I get it! We get it! It does pass but ugh! During. Blowwwwssssssss! My kids begged for a puppy especially my DD for years. But I waited. Then we get a lunatic dog and blasting full of energy. Ripping up every surface possible. But is the sweetest most loving dog ever. Very big now. But a wonderful. Companion! Howls like a fog horn. More like a bellow. But I adore him and so do our kids.
I never got a tattooed nipple, they do it for free. I’m ok with how I am. Even though I honestly look like a stitched up paper doll! It is what it is!
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What a cutey MicmeI. I had a dog many years ago. A black lab, so friendly and loving. I thought about getting a pet but we are not home enough.
I had a tram flap done also. I wish I wouldn't have though. My stomach is all messed up and the boob is almost flat now. They told me that might happen after awhile, but I was young and still wanted to look "normal".
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Simone~ I find it incredibly interesting that you just said your stomach is messed up. May I ask what you meant about that. I feel exactly the same way about mine. I feel like an oompaloompah and a turtle about mine. The scar is so defined that nothing moves below the scar so it gathers at my mid section like a top! It drives me nuts! I’m just wondering if that Is how you mean as well. Mine is not flat but I do have an area that tugs slightly, and is con-caved in the chest area. Hurts sometimes. But I guess it’s better than nothing. Not sure I’d choose that route again. But also see so many young ladies and women suffering with implants as well. Once you have cancer. Shit just blows up!!
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omg that D-E-E-O-G-H-E-E-E!!! 😍😍😍😍😍😍
Sooooooo cute!!!!!!!!!!!
I’m a dog maniac!!!!!! I love them sooo much!!!
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Quick copy/paste from another post as I have little energy and flaky WiFi.
My temporary intrathecal catheter insertion was done early yesterday and so far so good. I was 24 hours bedrest as a precaution against headaches just in case there there was a cerebrospinal fluid leak. My low back pain was severe where the insertion was as well as my lumbar area where I have severe osteoarthritis. Once I got moving today it eased. The titration was started immediately through the external pump with two different drugs infusing. My hydromorphone and methadone and ketamine have been lowered (one through a butterfly subcutaneously and the others orally. and I will be monitored for at least 10 days. A big concern right now is withdrawal with all the narcotics still in my system. Once my doctor is satisfied that all is working, I will go back to the OR and a permanent catheter will be placed along with an embedded pump. This could take weeks but one step at a time. There is hope that next week I can get over to BCCA for chemo. Right now no one wants my blood counts to go down due to chemo. I am so glad to have less pain and the hopes of a permanent solution.
XXOO Marian
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Micmel, Yes, same here. Mine is not flat and the scar almost seems to be cemented to something under it and doesn't move either. It doesn't matter how much I weigh I always have that crease. The skin is pure white, no circulation. I have accidentally burned my stomach and didn't feel a thing.
I have been going to a acupuncturist to help with fatigue and nausea, which seems to be helping. She took one look at my stomach and told me that is why I am sick. They cut from hip to hip and did a poor job at it. She said everything is getting stuck there. She has been working on the scar, getting it to soften and it's starting to flatten on the ends. It is a very slow process.
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Yes yes and yes. Cut from hip to hip wow! Not a good idea at all. I agree it is like cement and it doesn't move. It does need to be softened, that's exactly how I feel about my scar! I'm so sorry you're feeling that way also. It seems all of my weight goes directly there !!! You're definitely not alone. Drat! What we go through.
Marianelizabeth~you have been on my mind and I am glad to see you're here. I hope everything continues to iron out. I hope you can feel back in the saddle again and I am so sorry you're having to go back and forth with the hospital. It's always something it seems, I completely understand the withdrawal. I had dealt with some of that on my own. It was a nightmare so watch the symptoms, they creep up slowly and hammer hard! It all starts with nauseated feelings and muscle aches. Thinking of you and your comfort. Hugs friend!!
Philly come visit Deeohgee. We'd love to see you!
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Micmel, DH is ok, just an extreme case of intestinal trouble, several over the counter remedies have been tried and he is improving.
Got my flight for Chicago next month, actually Milwaukee and my BFF will drive from her house. The music fest has lots great bands, should be tons of fun 😁
Night night everyone
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there she goes again. Off on another jaunt. You go girl. I’m glad that your DH is feeling better. We need our men strong!! I’m glad you thought the bear gif was accurate. Lo
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My sister noticed today in her fish tank a second pregnant mama swimming around. They counted 26, fish before this fish had given birth. They are in fish mania lol0 -
Pat G I go to that Cancer Center. Maybe someday i can be in a clinical trial like that. 💞
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Hi ladies! I’m new to this thread and you all sound like wonderful ladies! I am newly diagnosed with leptomeningeal disease. Had an ommaya Reservoir implanted on August 1st and just had my second injection of Herceptin today.
Has anyone else had this diagnosis and how are you treating it??
I have been stage 4 since 2016 when my Er/PR/Her2+ breast cancer metastasized to my pituitary gland😡
Thanks in advance
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Micmel: I need help. I planted Gracie's tree and took a picture with my phone but I don't know how to post. Any help you can give me would be greatly appreciated. Poor little tree looks a little sad because it is young and it is very hot and dry right now so I also wanted to post a link so people could see what she will look like next year once she has recovered from being transplanted - but I don't know how to do that either. I am feeling a little challenged today. Hope everyone is having a good day. Hugs to all.
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