My Husband, My Life, My Love, My Family, My Cancer
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Elderberry, glad you had a good PET, stay away from google. I was doing the same when trying to look up enhancement showing up on my recent brain MRI. I know it could possibly be radiation changes, scar tissue growth and other more innocent stuff so I cannot entertain looking that up. Three months is a long way away for me to wait for the next one.
I did get the Costco order and did give the guy 10.00 more than original tip was. Litter will last a long time and is still cheaper than the other brand I would use even with the increased tip.
Candy, you have been through plenty and feeling crappy all the time is a high price to pay. We all decide whether it is worth it or not.
I too grieve my old life and condo I had but cancer took it from me too. Surveys help pay for some stuff. I have an app on the fireTV that plays cooking videos and I get paid for the ads. Mute the TV and can use another device while it is playing, earns almost 5 dollars USD a day by itself which is pretty good. I know how to stretch all of my supplies to last longer and usually pretty good at finding other stuff to do to make some extra money. It allows me to buy groceries I need without having to rely on charity to help. I try very hard not to dip into either my savings or investment trust account as that has to last me until I die. Bills and rent have gone up too but that is to be expected.
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Candy: Philly was shock.
At least we are though Pinking. I saw on the news Amy Klobuchar and Debbie Wasserman Schultz talking about breast cancer awareness and getting checked early. They both used the term survivor. I like Sen Klobuchar and I wish her well but saying you are a survivor one month out of lumpectomy and rads seem a little premature. I hope she continues to be cancer free. One of you ladies said "survivor" should be changed to NEAD, It is more accurate, even if it is 10 years after the first diagnosis. You never know when it will come back.
I saw an encouraging ad the other days about MBC. findyourmbcvoice.com. I haven't checked it out yet so it might still be a pharmaceutical company pitching its products but it used words like "advocacy".
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For a bit of fun.
I really wish my glow in the dark spray painted brain radiation mask would hold the glow longer. Could you imagine seeing me standing outside your window at night, lol. Sadly, this pic will have to do.
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Feeling very sad for Philly ( Brenda)….yet another loss. Goes with the territory for us but not any easier at all.
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Mae, I so love your sense of humor!!!
Candy, I’m sorry you’re still feeling so sick. I was feeling really nauseous a lot with Xeloda and some burning. Someone told me to take a Pepcid AC in the morning before I eat. It has really helped me. I’m not sure if it would help. I only take it once a day, and it’s the maximum strength. It helps with the acid in my stomach
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My daughter took my grandson out trick or treating for his first time, and we got to go too.He’s just a little over two. He had the best time and walked a really long way and did not want to go home. He would say trick or treat and say thank you after. He is so precious. It made me forget for an evening and just have fun watching him enjoy life.
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Thanks for the scare Mae.
Candy~ you sweet woman. Do what you can like Mae said there are NO expectations for any list.
Philly~ hit me hard. I knew she wasn't letting on how serious it had become so quickly. She took a trip in late August to the beach with her brother and. Sister. In law as well. She dipped her feet in the ocean. She twirled in the wind. She knew. She knew. Heart breaking . She thanked her family and said that cancer was on the move. Without saying it. She said it. She posted pictures and she didn't look sick. If it was spreading so fast I don't know why they took her breast. They should have left her in tact. The cancer moved so far, so fast. She was the closest person to me in proximity and we had tried so hard to meet up. Her being a city gal ( which she loved) didn't drive and my being a country gal. Don't drive in the city. So it never worked out. I wish these cellular assholes would dry up and die. Killing us is enough. Rest In Peace Philly. Sweet sweet woman. Friend so difficult to know she's gone
Love to all you sweet sisters.
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Philly was a beautiful presence and will surely leave a large circle of grief. Condolences to you, Mel, and her other friends.
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Well it turns out I don't have a fracture in my arm so I have to have a ct scan to see if it's a problem with my rotator cuff. I'm starting to get nervous about being off treatment for so long but my oncologist won't start up again until my lung infection clears up.
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KBL- I do take Pepcid 40mg each day. Have for a long time. This nausea from the Lynparza is just nausea, not additional heartburn. Just plain nausea. Hoping the lowered dose will help. Hope.
Kitty- Woohoo on the no fracture. Sorry for the rotator cuff issue. I have issues with my left shoulder-- torn rotator cuff and torn labrum, did a MRI to show that. Not fun. You take care. Hope they can start your treatment back soon, that would make me nervous too.
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Kitty~ I’m glad there is no fracture and hope it’s a muscle out of whack. Hope your lung infection clears up soon you’ve had a hard time of it. Lately.
Good morning to all
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Kitty, healing vibes for your lung infection clearing up and yay for no fracture.
I am so PO'd at myself. I have a credit card that does my rent and phone plus internet. I use it because I can get points for money off groceries. I usually pay the credit card off on the 1st of the month. Well, checked my bank and it was overdrawn by 900 dollars. I checked the transactions and for some reason I paid the amount twice. Now I have a huge credit on my card. I took money out of savings and cleared the overdraft but now will be busting my butt to replace the money I spent. Yes, paying twice is better than being late but really annoys me that I missed this. Working harder on surveys to add more money back to savings and will use the credit on the credit card toward groceries I suppose.
On a positive note, I bought some canned chicken and more of the Summer Fresh 7 grain and beans. Needed something different. I put some mayo and greek seasoning and warmed some chicken with the beans it was delicious. Canned meat makes sense because I don't eat enough actual meat to justify buying a chicken breast etc. I am liking the variety in my meals. I also stopped buying peanut butter because it was the last thing I really ate way too much of. Still trying to lose some weight and have been tweaking the food. Gave up chips, chocolate bars unless I walk across town for one which I may do today but will not keep junk in my house because I will just eat it all. We will see, so much to do today. Purging a lot more stuff ruthlessly and if it is not being used, will get rid of it. Also utilizing my dressers into storage, the unworking dryer has become another end table and may put some storage up there. Trying to clear under the bed out. Lots going on here today.
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Kitty- if it's not one thing it's another. Yay for no fracture but now to clear up the lung infection
Mel - I feel your pain and know your pain losing a wonderful friend even though you never had a chance to meet. When I went through BC the first time my very best friend with whom I shared everything was struggling with her MBC. She tried everything possible and at the end she wanted to be at home. She was a single parent as I had been for many years. I saw her every day. We would lay in her bed and talk and talk. She spoke of regrets and we started singing the oldie golden songs she wanted at her funeral. We laughed and cried and would even smoke a joint. It helped our pain inside and out. I helped her daughter with the funeral and it was a classy send off just like she was. I think of this all of the time but have never ever wrote it down or spoke how my true self feels at this point in my life.
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Sad for the bad news, but glad for the good news. I guess I missed a lot of yesterday, except to read about Philly's passing/murder.
Mara, I'm so sorry about your double payment and the hassle it created.
I have a brain MRI tomorrow, I'll definitely take the wine and dark chocolate (in that order! - haha).
Love to all this morning.
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Having a Mara-inspired lunch. Chicken salad made with Kirkland canned chicken on a bed of baby spinach-I have bunch of cans stockpiled. This one expired in 9.2020 but still tasted good. Protein and iron for the win!
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Candy, now that you mention it, I remember you have said that before. Sorry. Darn it.
I am here for pocket duty for anyone who needs it this week.
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Kittykat, a few years ago I had an x-ray to see if my arm was broken, and it wasn't. A physical therapist then diagnosed frozen shoulder. It made my arm hurt really bad but it was actually frozen shoulder.
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Chicagoan, I bought the Kirkland canned chicken as well, really tasty when combined with the Summer Fresh 7 grain dish this morning at breakfast. Yours sounds good too, been a while since I have enjoyed baby spinach, I just use the regular spinach frozen then chop it up to put on foods.
Just got back from a lovely and cool walk, 6 miles roundtrip to get a chocolate bar. I like the fact I did not tire out there or back and met a neighbour as I was coming the neighbourhood. Just a lovely person. I also enjoyed the many dogs in my neighbourhood on the way as well. Other than that, getting my bedroom reorganized. I want stuff brought out from under the bed for me to review if it is something I will need or want to use in future. If not, its going out. Not sure sure what I wish to do, might move some shelving so I can put a desk on the other side of the living room so I can do my surveys AND pedal the elliptical. Does not work to be bouncing on the couch while trying to fill stuff out. We will see.
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Have any of you noticed you don't think as clearly as you used to? I used to juggle several things at once. Now I make myself notes, all the time.
Today I made a list of when my monthly bills are due. Each bill is due on a different date. Some pay in person. Some by mail (our Postal service is having issues and things are late). Some bills paid online. I just cannot keep up anymore. I feel so foggy headed.
Then I worry when I get sicker will I be able to keep all the balls in the air.
This sucks.
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mara: I always say I won't go to Dr. Google. I am a liar. But I do try to go to Mayo Clinic or Johns Hopkins. My MO's office called today to get my weight and height prior to arranging my MRI appointment. Dr S called a little after for our pre-arranged tele appointment. He has been musing about the PET finding for awhile, He thinks it might be related to me having NF1 and not cancer related but wants to do MRI ASAP so as to shorten my scanxiety. I adore that man. Of course I went back to Dr Google and looked up NF1 and bone marrow disorders. Why do I do that?
candy: Taxol gave me terrible brain fog but now I just try to attribute it mostly to age. I was sent a meme "Why can I remember all the lyrics to songs from the 1960's but I can't remember why I walked into the kitchen?" I guess I am not a good as I was. I do find it necessary to write things on the calendar. I ordered my 2022 day timer a few weeks ago. How am I supposed to remember I have a ECHO in the middle of January 2022? . So many things are off in the future. There is a company in Montreal Quebec that makes the best day timers. W. Maxwell. I have my 4th one ready to go with entries in it already
Pocket duty for folks. Salted caramels in dark chocolate?
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Candy, yes, definitely. I have so much less to do compared with when I worked, but do feel more absent-minded in general. I just wrote a list of things that DH named off and even my handwriting looks terrible. I guess I don’t write a whole lot anymore, just type on a keyboard. Forgetful for sure.
Elderberry, Great news on your PET! You can breathe easier for a while 😊.
Mel, Philly sure was a human force, even to those of us who only knew her here. She’s one of those rare people we connect with right away because of her openness, joy, and empathy for others, and her way with words. For those of you who knew her more deeply, her loss has to hurt so much. I’m glad to have known her here.
KittyKat, Thinking if you as you find out more about treatment for your shoulder. Shoulder pain is rough.
Sunshine, in your pocket for your brain mri tomorrow.
Mara, That’s a good goal on organizing stuff in your bedroom. I’m sure you’ve heard of Marie Kondo who had a show and books on organizing. She has some questions you ask yourself in deciding whether to keep something. The big one is does it bring me joy? I think that’s hard to say on some things, but her method is a little more thoughtful than that too. I admire you for a 6 mile walk for a chocolate bar!
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Elderberry, we search things because our brains want to see what may be going on. Dr Google must be taken with a grain of salt. WebMd, mayo clinic etc are good sources.
Candy, I am able to multitask better after a walk. My multitasking usually doing a survey while I play music for money and other activities. I do think aging may have slowed some things for me as well as chemo fog.
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I have my credit cards on autopay since the penalties are so steep if they are late. My late mother put almost all her bills on autopay which was a blessing to me when I had to take over her finances. I'm thinking that if my health declines I will do that too just to make sure things don't fall through the cracks. For now I like writing out my bills so that I am conscious of how much I am spending on phone, heat, etc.
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That's why my rent, phone and internet are done by credit, I do get some money back in rewards but it helps to know they are done. I usually wait until the first to pay the credit back for the rent and phone but for some oddball reason, I did pay twice. Will use the credit for groceries which makes the most sense and use my surveys to pay back the savings account that paid the 1000 overdraft.
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Interesting article on potential for bee venom to be used as treatment for BC
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Ladies, good afternoon. I’m so sorry to hear about Philly! I hope she is at peace and her friends and family can find solace.
Elderberry, congrats on your PET scan! That’s great 😊
Kittykat, glad you do not have a fracture. I hope your lung infection clears up quickly so you can resume treatment. Sending you good thoughts!
Sunshine, in your pocket for your brain MRI tomorrow. I’ll bring all the Kit Kat’s!
I am still having a hard time. I was in a lot of pain this weekend, mostly in my right ribs but it started to wrap around to my back and creep up into my neck. I started taking the extended release meds Friday night and supplemented them with the immediate release pain meds. My pain went from an 8 yesterday to a 5ish. I called into work this morning because I didn’t want to drive on these meds and because my pain can flare up higher. My MO agreed to order a PET scan to see what this pain could be, I’m just waiting for them to call me back with the appointment. I just need to get this pain to a manageable level so that I can go back to work. The pain and the not knowing exactly what is causing it is stressing me out. It helps to know that y’all are here and understand what I’m going through. Thank you
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Katy, yes we do understand, yes we do. Sending you a hug.
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Katyblu, I'm so sorry for your pain. I sincerely hope they can find a treatable cause for it soon!
Carol
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How do we tell the Mods to add Philly to the memorial list?
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Candy, you can go to this link and ask the mods to add her name.
https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/56/topics/694012?page=37#post_57124080
