Starting Chemo September 2019
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Exodus14:13-14 "Do not be afraid stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today. The Lord will fight for you, you need only to be still". I hope all have abetter day and week God bless
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Gamb - love it!!
Maggie - yes ma’am you can do this!! This chemo business is temporary!
Snaffle - glad to hear the red devil is in the rear view for you!! Hope Taxol is kind!!
Lifting you all up today and hope you all have a good one!
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All -
I'm sorry to see this past week has been a struggle for so many of us. They weren't joking when they said the side effects were cumulative were they?
I'm coming out of my funk.... I'm back at work today. Just tired and achy, and I have thrush again
We can definitely do this ladies.... we will not let treatment keep us down for long.
Tracy
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I made it past the worst of TC round 2. I still have a lot of sinus and chest congestion from the flu/cold. I'm sooo tired! I made it to phycial therapy and work today though!
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Tomorrow is first of 4 Taxotere and Cytoxan chemo treatments and I find myself more resolved and less controlling now. I plan to do all i can to diminish SEs but I know I can't control these. I dread it but also appreciate every little bit I can. In fact, I've often said "Thank you Cancer!" when people do nice things for me, because they know I'm going thru this! It works for me and gives me a laugh while appreciating whatever nicety my sister (dahlias every Sunday since my surgery), son, daughter or DH do for me.
Anyway, reading all the things we feel and do to cope, I cannot say that I would begrudge anyone whatever works for them. Confession here: I've been a bitch lately with the anxiety before my first chemo. Now I'm on steroids to decrease chance of nausea and allergic reaction to chemo and I warned our youngest son and my DH that I'll be even more wired!!! Our son said jokingly (?) he'd be out with friends today!!!! Ha! I also have taken Paxil for years due to anxiety which started when our middle child developed schizophrenia. That was the saddest thing ever happened to our dear, sweet son and family. I'm not sure even cancer trumps that, but I sure don't want to leave my DH alone! We also have a transgender adult daughter who just had surgery last week and is doing well. I delayed my chemo start one week to make sure she was in a good place first. God knows I need my Paxil now!! I have insomnia at times also, but not too bad now, but will ask for something if it gets bad. Maybe the fatigue is a good thing for me and my family now!?
Whatever works for you, don't be ashamed or guilt yourself over it. We are dealing with the Big C here ladies! We are on the carousel of feelings. I have talked about this with other women and it's amazing how many have had breast cancer and are thriving! Talking to these ladies gives me great hope for my future when I see them 1-2 decades older than me and physically fit! They are my inspiration. Hoping we all find some inspiration to keep us going.
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Wow! kaaadams you have a lot on your plate! Good luck tomorrow!! I hope you only experience minimal SEs.
Glad your daughter is doing well after surgery! I know that must be a relief to you.
I agree - these survivor stories give me such hope! We’re all in this together
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Thank you, Gamb. Needed that.
The past few days have been horrible, especially yesterday. A physical and mental struggle. Just walking up a flight of stairs or going to the bathroom left me exhausted and in need of a nap. I felt very helpless, useless, out of control. I kept trying to remind myself that God is in control, but it's so hard when I'm out of "fuel", sweating from hot flashes, feeling twinges of pain, and unable to string a logical sentence together.
Finally started to come out of the fog after lunch today. It's amazing what a difference a tiny bit of energy and mental clarity makes. I still feel horrible and I'm really ticked that I have to do this one more time, but just that slight improvement is lifting the dark cloud and it really helps.
Praying for you all. I thought of all you fighters as the darkness tried to take over. I would not let it. I am a fighter, too. Hugs everyone!
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Lms, I agree, not good for me this time,, but I can see the light!!
Hugs Ladies!!
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Maggie and Gamb: thanks for the encouraging and honest words. Angie and Snaffle: you speak for a lot of us, too. Shared experiences help us realize we are not alone. (Cliche-esque, but so, so true!)
Started Cycle 3 of TCHP today. Uneventful with the usual drowsiness, restless legs for the first 2 hrs, and boredom. Tomorrow I should roar awake with such energy, it is funny. Wednesday will start out ok, and deteriorate quickly to diarrhea by late afternoon. I'll return for shot and fluids that morning.
We see patterns in this and predict accordingly. The first cycle I did just as ordered and popped Immodium at first sign of D. Second cycle, I waited until I felt my gut had emptied, then started the Immodium. I think the result was better: less cramping, gas, and quicker D recovery with less Immodium. It also helped that I got fluids with steroids on Day 3 and on day 8. That's a lot of fluids and steroids but a good result. We'll see how this time goes.
Finally, went out for first time with the wig. Very nervous, but had lots of affirmation and the wig fit and felt good.
I have rambled. My mantra for today: “This is temporary!
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Turkeypoult, love your smile,, wig looks amazing, good choice for you,, ask for lomotil it’s a script, has done wonders for me, hasnt helped the stomach pain, but I can deal with that,,
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LMS, so sorry for your struggle, but happy for you coming out the other side.
A little story: over 2 years ago my DH came to me with the idea that his retired self would feel complete with a vintage car from our youth. Long story short, I said OK. (After all - he's put up with me for most of 5 decades - why not?!) Months and months (years) of delays and much $$ later, the car is going to be revealed when? At a car show on day 6 - historically the worst day if the cycle (tied with day 7.) I am so angry at chemo!! All I want is to see the expression on his face when he sees it. (Has not seen it in a year.) Hopefully we'll work something out.
I know this sounds sotrivial and I know I am a fortunate person, but I'm so angry.
End rant.
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You've earned the right to rant, Turkeypoult. I hope you can work something out to see it (video chat?) And, you look wonderful! Love your wig. I wouldn't have guessed it was a wig if I didn't know.
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LMS I’m so sorry for your struggle but glad you are coming out of the fog!! You are a fighter!!! Getting through this just proved it! Keep on going!
Turkey - you and I are on the same treatment! The diarrhea is more manageable if you let it all go and then take an Immodium. It’s amazing what we all get used to when anticipating the SEs. I hope you get to see your DH’s face when he sees his car!!
Good night, all!! Have a peaceful night!
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Tough day today. Day 21 since starting chemo, and lost most of my hair in the shower. I felt like I was handling it well and pragmatically asked my husband to buzz the rest down to an inch, which he lovingly did ... at least until I I literally passed out cold and had to be carried unconscious to my bed, eyes rolled back in my head and everything. Woke up a minute or two later, sweating and my ears ringing super loud, then immediately slept again for two hours. Apparently I was not as prepared as I thought for this step...
But closed out the day with retail therapy, ordering cute bandannas on amazon. Here’s to a better day tomorrow.
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Turkey - I would've never known that was a wig if I hadn't read the responses.
I always have you ladies in my prayers but I'll make a special request that you get to see that look on your hubby's face. 
manda - *hug* I love retail therapy. I'm ready to buy more cute hats!
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mandamaybe, I have experienced tinnitus (ringing in the ears) for years, but I noticed the effect was louder and more completely surrounding my head with chemo. My MO suggested Claritin every day, rather than just days 1-5. I was skeptical, but I tried it and I do think the effect is reduced.
Love retail therapy"! I have quite the collection of beanies, etc. One that I bought surprised me. It is really for cooler weather and looks better on than in the pictures. I'm no model, but here goes:
Comfy and goes with sweats or jeans. Amazo
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We're hat twinning today! Although the material on yours looks more comfy.
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Cute, Brilee!!! Love the detail
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Mandamaybe, I hope you are having a better day today.
Great hats, ladies! I just got a couple of similar ones in the mail yesterday.
Tonight, hubby is going to cut my hair super short. I still have a decent amount hanging on, but it's shedding a lot and feels so damaged. I figure in about 14 days it's all going to fall out anyways and hopefully I'll be mentally ready to go bald at that point!
Today's mantra-this pain and discomfort is temporary. We'll get through it!
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kaadams
You have a lot on your plate. I hope your daughter is recovering well, and your first TC has minimal side effects.
(((hugs)))
Tracy
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LMS - I'm right there with you. Today is the first day since this latest infusion that I've felt anywhere close to normal, and that's not saying a lot given that I have no energy and my mouth is raw from thrush. Like you, I'm seriously dreading TC # 4 in 2 weeks...… but at least it's only one more.
Wishing us all strength as we fight through this kicking, screaming, crying, or napping.
Tracy
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Turkeypoult
I don't think it's trivial. Cancer and treatment just robs us of so much... of course you would want to see this.
(hugs)
Tracy
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mandamaybe
I think losing the hair is a hard blow for all of us... until then, we may feel like crap, but we don't "look sick". Losing our hair is like hanging a sign over our heads that shouts "I Have Cancer"....
Tracy
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Turkeypoult and Bridget - Love the beanies/hats!
I think I went overboard when I bought mine. I have about 20 in all different colors LOL
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No such thing as overboard.
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I second what Brilee said! I have about 15 in various patterns. I don’t like wearing the solid color ones because I look like I’m about to break into your house! 😂 I’ll just save those for working around on the farm.
I’m having my first consult with my plastic surgeon Friday. I’m having a double mastectomy with reconstruction. Any pertinent questions I should ask? I’m just now starting to do a little more research before I go. This appointment snuck up on me
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Hey all, glad everyone is feeling better, Angie I did t have reconstruction,,but I did wind up with dog ears, so I would ask if your surgeon can make sure you don't wind up with those, it feels like I have a rock under my left arm and I will have to have it removed later on ,maybe, I was hoping it would go down but no such luck.
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Gamb, I ended up with dog ears, too, even though I was adamant I didn't want them. So disappointing. I will have a revision next year.
No such thing as too many hats! I only have 8 at the moment, but planning for more! We deserve them, right???
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I just had my husband cut my hair short, maybe about 2 or 3 inches long, in preparation for losing it all in a week or two. I already have several bald spots, but tonight I don't care because now I get to wear this new beauty. And I'm ready to get more hats and a sassy wig!
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You are all looking beautiful and rocking your assorted headwear choices and your baldness! You all inspire me. 😊
My hair has been gone for a week and a half or so and I haven't been able to go out in public since, even with a hat/beanie. I hope to soak up some of your braveness! I've ordered a wig and I hope that once it's here, I will feel ok going out with it on.
I am trying to enjoy the last couple of days before AC #3 on Thursday. Still struggling mentally, but trying my best to get through it.
I am going to a Look Good, Feel Better workshop tomorrow, so I'm really hoping that helps. I'm very anxious about going, as I have always had social anxiety, so it's ramped up right now. But I know I will feel better afterwards, so I'm determined not to talk myself out of it. I'm also looking forward to seeing my brother and 3 little nephews tomorrow.
I hope you are all doing well. 😊
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