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Topic: Single life after a mastectomy

Forum: Singles With Breast Cancer —

Singles with breast cancer who want to connect.

Posted on: Apr 29, 2011 11:32PM

txkari wrote:

Hello --

I'm a 47 year old single, who was diagnosed with DCIS grade 3 in early March. The affected area is quite large ... 15 cm in one direction. I have had two partial mastectomies and they still don't have clear margins, so I will be getting a full mastectomy on the left side in a few weeks.

I guess I took the Dr's assurances that I would be OK, a little too much to heart. I was ready for a little surgery and radiation. I wasn't ready to be told I needed a full mastectomy. The reality of it hit me a couple of nights ago.

I haven't met with the plastic surgeon yet, so I'm not sure what my reconstruction plan is yet. My questions are ... how did you prepare yourself to see your body after the surgery? I'm rather large breasted (DD) so the difference is going to be pretty dramatic. Have you found that men can look past the changes in your body? Do they understand? I just want to know if I need to resign myself to being alone. Is there love after a mastectomy/reconstruction?

Thanks

Dx 3/4/2011, DCIS, 6cm+, Stage 0, Grade 3, 0/0 nodes
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Mar 10, 2018 10:12AM NotBrokenJustBent wrote:

E, I love the pup. I wondered about the exam but when we did not hear I thought best to not ask. I am always thinkin bout you. Keep us posted on your doctor appointment. I have been having some anxiety issues and deep breathes, prayer and mediation are very calming to me. If your crochet is not enough maybe try that?I wish you had someone by your side for this doctor appointment. Hang in there.

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Mar 10, 2018 01:10PM Jazzygirl wrote:

Hi friends- just a quick check in. Ten days off the hormone blockers and adjusting. Did a little 5 year ceremony with a good friend last night at her house in the mountains. So many people don't get the importance of getting through treatment milestones. My five years really marks coming off the meds. We had a great evening of vintage wine, appetizers, and conversation.

E- I am glad you had your CT scan and hope the news is good at the doctors apt and that the medications are working in your favor. I love the crocheting too, I was a big knitter when I was a kid. Very therapeutic. I love the sweater and the other animals you have been making. I hope the closing in April goes without a hitch. Having the money will really help you.

June- I expect like others back east, you are in between storms. Do you live in a high rise apt?

Broken- I am so with you on the importance of breathing and meditation. Yoga breathing and meditation have done much to calm my soul in troubled times (which seems constant these days...)

Hello to all the others here and wishing everyone a good Daylight Savings change tonight (for those in the US...)

Dx 9/14/2012, DCIS, 1cm, Stage 0, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 9/14/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 11/15/2012 Lumpectomy: Left, Right Surgery 11/15/2012 Lymph node removal: Left, Sentinel Surgery 11/15/2012 Lymph node removal: Right, Sentinel Radiation Therapy 1/7/2013 Breast Radiation Therapy 2/25/2013 Breast Hormonal Therapy 3/21/2013 Arimidex (anastrozole), Aromasin (exemestane)
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Mar 10, 2018 03:45PM NotBrokenJustBent wrote:

Just when I think I have absolutely no sex drive left I saw this and thought "Oh Sweet Baby, what I would like to do to you"!!!


See the source image

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Mar 10, 2018 05:53PM - edited Mar 10, 2018 05:54PM by Jazzygirl

Broken- funny, I have a female friend whose daughters are trying to fix her up with someone here. She is reluctant to go (still trying to sort some things out with someone else), but she showed me his pic and he looks like Keanu Reeves. I thought later after the conversation, I should have suggested they send him my way if she is not interested. One woman's trash is another woman's treasure.

That fellow is cute!

Dx 9/14/2012, DCIS, 1cm, Stage 0, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 9/14/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 11/15/2012 Lumpectomy: Left, Right Surgery 11/15/2012 Lymph node removal: Left, Sentinel Surgery 11/15/2012 Lymph node removal: Right, Sentinel Radiation Therapy 1/7/2013 Breast Radiation Therapy 2/25/2013 Breast Hormonal Therapy 3/21/2013 Arimidex (anastrozole), Aromasin (exemestane)
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Mar 11, 2018 12:11AM Enerva wrote:

ahhh you girls are funny

Jazz glad you are doing well

No broken yea I do the meditation at nigjt before bed .it works

Aw I must find out about the class .hope I did pass I still have no clue lol

Love you girls

Dx 8/27/2012, ILC, 6cm+, Stage IIIA, Grade 3, 1/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Chemotherapy 10/17/2012 Cytoxan (cyclophosphamide) Chemotherapy 12/20/2012 Taxotere (docetaxel) Surgery 3/24/2013 Mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Radiation Therapy 5/30/2013 Breast, Lymph nodes Surgery 12/23/2013 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right) Surgery 8/26/2014 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right)
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Mar 11, 2018 08:46PM juneping wrote:

Bent - lol @ what you want to do to him....hahaha...

Jazzy - i live in a mid rise...and i think my UGG were ruined in the storm last wednesday. i hope that's the last snow this winter.

oh keanu R...i've read an article about him who is a very generous man with a big heart. he's been through a lot. it's always that kind of story i heard makes me have faith in humanity again.

E - that's very cute doggie...and keeping my fingers crossed on your scan.

juneping.wordpress.com/ Dx 11/15/2013, DCIS Dx 11/15/2013, IDC, 6cm+, Stage IIIA, Grade 2, 2/35 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Mar 11, 2018 09:42PM Jazzygirl wrote:

I went to see this NM native American artist today (Robert Mirabal) do a performance today with a local ballet company. I hope you enjoy this wonderful video and the filming in Monument Valley. One of my favorite places.



Dx 9/14/2012, DCIS, 1cm, Stage 0, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 9/14/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 11/15/2012 Lumpectomy: Left, Right Surgery 11/15/2012 Lymph node removal: Left, Sentinel Surgery 11/15/2012 Lymph node removal: Right, Sentinel Radiation Therapy 1/7/2013 Breast Radiation Therapy 2/25/2013 Breast Hormonal Therapy 3/21/2013 Arimidex (anastrozole), Aromasin (exemestane)
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Mar 29, 2018 11:58AM Enerva wrote:

hi ladies

Hope all ok here

I will start my gardening class tonight which I am looking forward to.

I finally got the results and I passed the accounting course not with a high mark only 65 lol but I am glad I passed at least all that work and $ were not garbage? Well maybe in a way it was cuz I can't continue now

Anyway also I little stress cuz I haven't hear from the lawyers regarding the sale contract

Hopping all goes ok

Tenants never gave any deposit yet I sent the status certificate to the lawyer but did not hear from him yet. I will call him up. I still did not finish the will papers so many stupid questions that do not apply to me and I keep ignoring the forms :(

Anyway I will get on it

Dx 8/27/2012, ILC, 6cm+, Stage IIIA, Grade 3, 1/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Chemotherapy 10/17/2012 Cytoxan (cyclophosphamide) Chemotherapy 12/20/2012 Taxotere (docetaxel) Surgery 3/24/2013 Mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Radiation Therapy 5/30/2013 Breast, Lymph nodes Surgery 12/23/2013 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right) Surgery 8/26/2014 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right)
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Mar 29, 2018 07:59PM NotBrokenJustBent wrote:

E, we sold a lot of properties and most by owner. As I recall you gave it away and accepted a low ball bid so not to inconvenience them and for a quick sale. Get on it or put it on the market. Sounds like you are getting the run around. F that! In my experience they are not serious.

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Mar 29, 2018 08:06PM NotBrokenJustBent wrote:

Oh, and congrats on the exam. It is an accomplishment and you did well. It is amazing that you were even able to focus given all going on.

E, again, get tough with these buyers. Sounds like they are playing games. Bought a lot of homes in my time and seems like you need to get the condo on the market. Without a deposit they are not serious.

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Apr 3, 2018 03:54PM Enerva wrote:

ha ha ha notbroken

I met the tenants this morning to sign a paper for their taxes and I asked them if all is ok?

They said yes and that the deposit will be delivered as soon as the lawyer contact their lawyers or as soon as the contract is signed so that is a good news.

Tomorrow I have my appointment with the lawyer and he will have the contract ready hopefully all will fall into place now. I will also give the chq for my will and get that done too. Just need to finish filling in the forms now which I have been putting off for the longest time .no sure why I have the fear of when j sing the will I will be signing my life away ? I am so silly but is how I feel lol

Dx 8/27/2012, ILC, 6cm+, Stage IIIA, Grade 3, 1/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Chemotherapy 10/17/2012 Cytoxan (cyclophosphamide) Chemotherapy 12/20/2012 Taxotere (docetaxel) Surgery 3/24/2013 Mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Radiation Therapy 5/30/2013 Breast, Lymph nodes Surgery 12/23/2013 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right) Surgery 8/26/2014 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right)
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Apr 3, 2018 11:05PM - edited Apr 4, 2018 06:33AM by Jazzygirl

E- good luck with everything on the apartment. It will be good to have this done and some more money available friend.

Dx 9/14/2012, DCIS, 1cm, Stage 0, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 9/14/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 11/15/2012 Lumpectomy: Left, Right Surgery 11/15/2012 Lymph node removal: Left, Sentinel Surgery 11/15/2012 Lymph node removal: Right, Sentinel Radiation Therapy 1/7/2013 Breast Radiation Therapy 2/25/2013 Breast Hormonal Therapy 3/21/2013 Arimidex (anastrozole), Aromasin (exemestane)
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Apr 4, 2018 07:30PM NotBrokenJustBent wrote:

E, the will is a tough thing. I do not have one, no need as I have very little and what I do have can be transferred just by noting a beneficiary. I am thinking I need a Power of Attorney though. When I went in for my surgery we had an understanding that my sister would be responsible for decisions regarding my care but I will need to get that done at some point. Verbal wishes may not be legal. Ugh...I hate lawyers but probably there are forms online.

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