Im bitchy, I moan, I groan.....anyway.
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Pinky: I like your answer to asking for a donation, you already "gave". Have you seen the t shirt with something like: Yes, they are fake, My real ones tried to kill me.
Saint: great limerick. Sheri: celebrate, celebrate - even if "belated". Enjoy and congrats.
Neuropathy SUCKS. I have it in my ring and little finger on my left hand - notice my "lefty" nick name... Yes, I am very left handed. Which means I am in my "right" brain ?... but it seems to have a lot of chemo fog clouds going at present.
Others: THAT SUCKS, and I can't remember long enough to post individual replies.
A SOI: the last 3 rides to chemo, there was a nice shiny penny on the floor when I got in. I put them in my chemo bag and am not sure if they are a "sign" or what. And we had a great Pah Tee for Christina and Bonnie for their last tx. No one complained even though there were 6 of us hanging out together.
Hugs and Blessings and THAT SUCKS as needed. Nancy
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Pinky I can one up your cashier story. About two weeks after my husband died some guy called to sell him life insurance. When I said he wasn't home he started talking to me about life insurance. I let this guy go on and on, must have taken a good thirty minutes or more of his time. And then I asked the key question, do you pay out for any reason of death? He assured me they did and I pushed, you sure there is no reason you would deny payment? He said there was no reason. I then asked what was the max policy I could get. Needless to say this guy was getting excited. I then told him I wanted the max amount, cost didn't matter, blah, blah, blah. Then I said, how fast can it go into effect he said immediately. I doubled checked that no health checks nececessary and he said no. I acted estatatic and said this is so awesome because he died last week. How soon can I expect a check? He kind of lost his words after that, but I laughed my ass off.
I'm sorry too all those with trouble. the normal leakeage, WTH is that???? I never heard anyone use that term. I just wish men had to deal with normal leakage down in their pants near their penis, bet they would find better ways to deal with all this crap.
And skipping birthdays is just NOT ALLOWED!!!! We must celebrate all out birthdays. You never know when it is your last and life is precious. Enjoy it no matter how sucky the day. come see us we will help perk you up! I loved all the happy bday songs I saw!
Saint, tell your family to get that seizure problem fixed now! Sounds like a time for a new doctor because random seizures are just not normal. Especially if they didn't start at birth.
I hope I caught it all but I keep watching these darn politics and working myself up.....why would I do this????? I know they upset me yet I turn it on every night before I go to bed. I really think I have some serous mental issues that someone is overlooking! LOL
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Rock - My laptop will never be the same. you slay me.
Shari - No fair. You shouldn't have things coming out of orifices no matter what...and when you want to skip your birthday no no no no no. A hug and a toast. I'll even wear a silly party hat.
Pinky - I'll fix you a whole tray of shrimp. Hoping you're driving soon. I'll say you gave - and then some. I can just imagine the look on the guy's face.
Cristine - That sux..Sometimes you wonder what on earth people are thinking...or if they're thinking.
Nancy - Shiny pennies have to be good luck.
LuAnn - Pain pump doing ok? TG it's only another week and a half before we're done for another 4 years. I swear every commercial is political and they go pro/con/pro/con...totally sick of the whole thing. After my dad died, we kept getting calls from the blood bank - he had an unusual type & was on their donor list. We told them I don't know how many times that he'd died, and they kept calling. Being the obnoxious teens that we were, the last time they called we gave them the number of the cemetary. When certain things happen to you, you're given carte blanche to do whatever the hell you want.
Who did I miss??? It SUCKS.
Thanks for the good wishes and candles. A few hacks and coughs today and (dare I say) no leaks.
Drinking down my last Fresca, going to brush my teeth, and then (hopefully) sleeping through the night. take care all
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Quick pause just to say: Saint, nicely done! Nicely done! ("freakage" and "leakage" was INSPIRED.)
May your suckage be minor today, women!
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I have decided "it's just normal leakage" will be my response to any complaints or comments from anyone today.
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cmb: you could say it is your IOS or IOL - issue of leakage... better than needing Depends (diapers for adults)...
Everyone -- have a day free from sad, lonely, pain, and all things that are a downer. May the day bring smiles, warmth, love and blessings. Nancy
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Yeah, for me, everything today will just be a "leakage issue."
I had my first tx this morning.... finally. It was scary but not painful and so far all's fine.
Hugs and thanks to all,
Shari
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Hi everybody- I'm back.................. Can't keep a good woman down.
Thanks everyone for your prayers and thoughts. Must be working, as I am able to get to the bedside commode and a few steps w/ walker.
Its getting easier to get into the car but still can't do it by myself. Met w/ my boss yesterday to get short term disability (75% salary) startedn for 13 days then 50% for 13 days then the long term disability kicks in. My boss and client have agreed to pay me 2 weeks vacation until the disblity kicks in. This is a big major relief. Finally got most of the things moved (Grant & my sister moved while I was in the hosp but i found em anyway
Was the house I found about 12 miles east of where we were w/ no steps. It was boiling down to no steps or skilled nursing facility until my arm healed and w/ a met fracture who knows how long that is going to be. Talked to my reg dr ( not on staff at same hosp as onc) Told me to stop all the crap they put me on and go back to reg regime. I am feeling better in that direction as well and getting stronger each day. Still get extremely tired and horribly bored, guess I'll have more time to spend on the computer 
, but it will give me a reason to get out of bed each day.As soon as everything gets back to semi normal I have to have my port replaced. A nurse that had no idea what she was doing tried to inject some D 5W with out opening the port so it blew out. Dr Talley wants to do it immediately and start back on the chemo. I just cant yet. Chemo puts (doxil) me on my butt for a week when I don't have any other issues. one step forward and 7 steps backward. If taking a chemo break for a few weeks is going to cause that much loss, don't think its working that well yet. We are getting some response on the lung mets, but not any on the bone mets yet. It just seems to go on and on w/no relief in sight. Don't know what I would do if it weren't for you ladies.
A BIG IOS FOR THE ENTIRE MONTH OF OCTOBER W/ A COUPLE OF DAYS IN SEPTEMBER JUST FOR THE FUN OF IT!!
Helen
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WhaSux??
Rock----I know better---but now there's pea soup on my monitor---inspired you say??? hahahahah
LuAnn--you rock! I loved you b4, but since meeting you I can just HEAR you now------stop cranking yourself on the politics kid! or do I need to open this can of whoopass?????
AKA---love your sense of humor---even in deep suckage it still glints thru-----wish we could all be at your PAH TEE at your last tx! HUGS
Helen!!! So great to see you posting! NO, no one can keep a good woman down--& YOU are da bomb!!! Keep slinging it, girlfriend! We wanna hear all about it. So happy to know you are healing--When I broke my femur last year they stopped everything! I needed my body to focus on the bone healing----big hugs! I agree with your attitude about the chemo break----heal & feel well.
Carte Banche says it well---after over 8 years of this $hit someome (who knows my story) recently asked me very sweetly, "And what have you been up to??" So I replied as sweetly, "Growing cancer, I'm quite good at it--and you?" Yeah, well I already admitted: ain't no saint--LOL
I say everything has to have SOME redeemable value-----take it where you can find it!
THAT SUX to all who need it .....Be well & stay strong!
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Hi everyone and a big that sucks to all who need one. I'm looking back and can't believe how long it has been since I posted. Sure has been a busy week.
Helen1: I had no idea you were going through all of this. I'm glad you are out of the hospital and starting to feel better. I'm sending a big that sucks and a big hug to you my dear friend.
Hey to everyone else. I am really so behind, I will never, ever catch up - so I will start from here.
Nicki
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Hi everyone.
Survived the surgery ok. Went in at 7:15, had the wires inserted around 8:30. They kept asking me if I was ok...sure, as long as I kept my eyes shut. Got back to admitting and they took me back to pre-op. Surgery at 10. Ha. Surgeon was down at Outpatient doing another procedure and was delayed. A switch of anesthesiologists. 11:30 went into surgery. Had a General, thank God. Finally got home at 5:30 pm. He took a golf-ball size mess o'tissue out of me. Path in about 5 days. A few darvocet, but feeling ok.
Helen - what a month.. Good for boss and client giving you paid vacation til disability kicks in, but sad you need it at all. Hope November is better.
Saint - growing cancer...ha. You are my kind of lady. Keep on with the zings.
If we didn't laugh, we'd cry. And I'd rather laugh.
IOS to a minimum.
Pam
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{{{HELEN}}} Prayers and good thoughts, and thank heavens your boss and client were so supportive. I'm sure it some relief! Big THAT SUX to you
{{PAM}}What a long day for a surgery! Geepers, my mast/sln was quicker than your day! Hope you are recouping well at home now? Prayers for the test to as you'd like!
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Just checkin' in to say surgery sucks and recouperation sucks more!
I have chosen to ignore any work issues right now. They are lucky I show up at all.
LuAnn - My mom used to tell telemarketers who asked for my dad that he had died and she did that even before he was dead...lol!!
Hoping for only SOI's over the weekend!
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Hugs and minimal or NO IOS today or over the weekend. Nancy
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Saint
I remember last year w/ your broken leg. Seemed like you said it would take longer because of the metastises. How much longer? My arm doesn't hurt that much, I just can't use it to push out of the chair or use it move the wheel chair. Have Home Health Care coming Monday to see about an electric wheel chair. Ins. nurse liasion says she can help speed things along, so here's hoping. Once I am able to walk some on my own and am able to get in and out of the car w/ out help..I will have a lot more freedom of movement an wont be feeling the need to pull my hair (whats left of it) out
Helen
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Hi Helen
My femur broke because there was a lesion in that area. It was a very bad break since so much of the bone was already gone. I am quite pleased with how I have healed, tho I acccept I will never be a runner again! I was indepedant farily quickly-actually driving within 2-3 months. I think it would have been slower to heal if I had not stopped tx for a few weeks (onc just said that that was what we were gonna do--no option) I feel the healing slowed when I restarted chemo, but that is standard with most chemo. It was my choice to go back in tx as soon as onc allowed it tho I knew it would heal more slowly.
HUGS! hope you are up & at 'em soon----rather---- I KNOW from your past experiences you will be up & at 'em soon!! LOL
Be well & stay strong
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My arm also broke in a mets spot as well. Diagonal complete fracture mid humerus on the left. Has a rod thru the entire bone from the shoulder to just above the elbow.
My onc wanted me to get the port put in right away and continue the same schedule of doxil every 4 weeks. I missed th one due on 10/4. I just cant face the idea of dealing w/ the side effects from the chemo. They are bad enough on a good week. I feel that I at least need to be able to get in the infusion chairs. Plus if skipping 2 or 3 treatments is going to be such a set back, why do them at all. Like I said , I jsut need a chemo break
Helen
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HUGS--then take the break!!! I agree-if a few weeks really could make that much difference when we take a break how come it doesn't make a bigger difference when we take it for months & not cure us!!???
I also have a rod thru my femur-knee to hip (it's fuschia colored! LOL) . The length of recovery time is due to how it was put in----I know my hip was not broken--but the rod had to enter THRU my hip & that is where I still have occasional pain.
Take a break, girlfriend!!! Be well & stay strong.
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Hello everyone,
I haven't been on in a couple days. Had my drains removed yesterday and my first expansion. Last night I just didn't feel like logging on. I did get some prozac from the doctor along with ambien. The ambien didn't seem to work last night, but I hope tonight is better. I had hoped the mere fact that the drains were out I would fall into great sleep. My back is still sore and the expansions are tight and hard.
I have started taking an online class to keep my mind off my troubles while I wait to become a new person.
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Hi everyone - big THAT SUX to whoever needs it.
I am scrambling to get the two quilts into action in case of hospitalization..... going prepared with pre-cut pieces to sew.... ne'er waste time.
I am worried because I don't know what else they can do to a lung..... I have had 2 thoradesis and 2 pleuradesis on this one. The other one has only had it done once. I start crying at the sight of a chest tube.
Im not sure what to do if they put me on oxygen.... wouldnt it hamper my activities. Thank heavens for the scooter or I may have been grounded.
Enough about me... sorry to hear about broken bones and fuschia coloured rods. But if they have to put one in, the colour might be fun to know.
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Hi Y'all,
Well I had another round of Taxol on Thursday. It seems Abraxane nor Xeloda have been approved or not approved in a way that Medicare will not pay for them. (I am on medicare due to being on disability with MS.) So it was Taxol, Taxotere or stop and do surgery - which she doesn't feel I am ready for.
So I sucked it up and did more Taxol. It went a llittle smother this time, except I didn't sleep from Wed. night until last night from 10:30 p.m. to 4:20 this morning - woohoo! The bone pain has started, and so far the neuropathy is at about the same stage. I am prepared with lots of topical meds from the Wound Center if I develop all the open sores again. I also have been taking B6 and L-glutamine.
I can't remember anything I read right now - thanks chemo brain! I read and it falls out before I get a chance to write about it.
A big that sucks to all who need it, followed by hugs.
Love to all,
~Bliss
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Good morning and a big that sucks to all that need it because they are here.
I did get some sleep last night but this ambien is not doing it. I took one Friday and tried two last night. I guest I will have to call and get my doctor to call in something else. I also started taking some prozac. I hope it works fast.
I feel like screaming this morning, but have to cook breakfast and do the laundry. Since my drains are gone, i plan on going to visit my house today. I know I can't stay long but a a good visit and an exchange of clothes will be good. It has changed seasons here since I went in the hospital. I don't have a coat or any closed toe shoes or any fall clothes. That also has kept me pissed off. I like having all my clothes
The muscles around my back feel like a bra that is five sizes too small. The expanders are pulling at the skin on the bottom of my breast. Feels like it is tearing off of my ribs.
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I used elavil for quite a few years and it helped me sleep really well. It is also an old antidpressant so it wokrs on a different part of the brain than most so it was kind of nice. I recently stopped taking it when my slepp troubles seemed to go away. Right now I'm havingin real trouble trying to stay awake. I am going to try not to fix any typos to show you how bad my concentration gets as I try to type. It is awful and I about fall asleep doin just about anything....
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A big huge giant fat pile of that sucks to all! (That doesn't sound quite right!)
I'm pissy tonight. Actually, I'm bitchy, I moan and I groan (and not in anything close to a good way!)
Funny how it makes you feel better even to just be able to say it, that sucks! Life sucks! My life is pretty much sucking right now. Suck, suck, suck!
hhhmmm, I feel better already!~
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I
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A real f...ing that sucks this morning!
I spent most of the night propped up on the corner of the sofa because the expansion is making it hard for me to breath. I had so hoped that I would sleep this weekend since the drains came out on Friday. I wish the ps had given me a couple of days between removal and expansion. I could have used one night of sound sleep. He gave me ambien and that has not worked.
I so hat the entire world this morning, especially anyone who tells me how "lucky" I am. So what, that I am now cancer free. I hate cancer! Everyone close to me has suffered from this shit. My Aunt who raised me until I was 13 died from breast cancer, my sister died from breast cancer, my younger nephew is taking chemo for colon cancer and I am still sore from my bi-lateral. sorry right now it is hard to find lucky in all of this.
I am thankful to be cancer free, but lucky and ungrateful I am not. I am pissed that I had to have my breast removed to save my life. I am pissed that I ache and I am pissed that I am tired and can't sleep. I am also broke and behind in bills. All I can say, is "Thank you cancer for coming into my life."
Thanks for letting me vent this morning. I really need it.
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Vent away Pinky thats what were are here for!!! I will add a big that sucks today because it was tx day
Even though my tx is pretty easy it gets so tiring doing this appts that you know will never ever come to an end.... 0 -
I'm so sorry for everybody on this entire board that is going through so much s*it right now. It just sucks. I'm so freaking sad for everybody. Did anybody see Amber's pic of her gamma knife procedure on her blog? OMG!!!!!!!!!!! That picture just got to me. I'm not complaining....I related to that picture.....who of us couldn't????. I have one very similar only I didn't have the freaking head gear screwed into my skull! THIS DISEASE SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You know what else sucks? (And, I hope they read this too!!!!) I am sick and freaking tired of everybody in my "real" life that I mention a bcsister who has passed away after they ask me what is wrong.......when they tell me "you need to get off that website!" BITE ME!!!!!!!!!!!! The girls on this site (and my 'lil sis) are the only people who can freaking relate to what I am saying, and feeling!!! It's a FREAKING SUPPORT GROUP GET IT????? LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!! Fine! Stop asking me what is wrong!! EVERYTHING is wrong!!!
>>>>>>>>>>>deep sigh<<<<<<<<<<<<<0 -
You are right traci!
Everything is wrong. I am so tired of people who aren't going thru anything walking around telling me how I should feel and what I should do. How the f do you know what I should do.
I just mentioned to the person I stay with and I had to listen to a lecture regarding my not eating to build up my blood. He is hot so why am I cold. He is walking around drinking a vodka and cranberry juice down by the fireplace.. dah,,, how would you be cold.
I hate mylife right now. When this ass isn't drunk he is a wonderful person, talking about a candidate for AA. he has no idea what an ass he turns into. I know it is hard to deal with a sick person but becoming drunk and judgmental willnot help.
Since I don't eat right, I now am going toput together a grocery list of things that I need from the store.
Lord give me strength. I have to remind myself that he hasn't left since I have been sick. That he has taken me to all my appointments, he stayed by my bed and has been supportive, but his drinking is out of control and he doesn't even know it. I would love to have one evening, just one damn evening with out haveing to deal with the change in personality by the time the sun goes down.
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WhaSux???
WAY too many IOS's for ppl here~~~This is the place to vent so have at it sisters!!! We are here to support & empathize--- I will do my best not to offer any solutions- I tend to be one of "those" & it really pisses my sister off when she just wants to VENT!
Big HUGS to all here & a MIGHTY, COLOSSAL, BEHEMOTH, EAR-SPITTING: THAT SUXXXXXXXX!
Be well & stay strong
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