Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?
Comments
-
Chevy, we have the "move over to the next lane when cop is stop with lights on" law here too......WA and Colorado passed leagalized POT sales....the stores in WA open Jan 10 -
A generous heart, kind speech and a life of service and compassion are the things which renew humanity.
Budda0 -
Coming in late today. Had to take Dh to Marion V.A. to have pre-tests done for his hernia surgery. Makes usually for a long day, but I think they prefer to do it at the hospital rather than the V.A. satellite office which is much closer. That is ok, for as a treat and if there is some time I always stop for a bit at a big thrift store in town. Found a great heavy jacket that can only be washed in the washer.........no dry-cleaning it said and it fits me so well. Only $5.00..........so my washing machine will be busy later on this evening.
Hmmm, on my list of things I wished I'd have thought of..........making a recording of my parents. Of course, I talk to them everyday -- but I don't see them when I do and they don't answer back. Still, I enjoy just 'blessing' them for giving me a wonderful childhood and all the work it took to make me an adult --- at least I think I am. They were/are the VIP's in my life and I always think......I'll never truly know, but the things that happened as I was growing up, and the life we were able to have together when I was able to leave home, it now seems could never have turned out so well if Mom and Dad ( each with their own set of faults ) had not been exactly like they were.
Sandra, I'd hate it if I could not drive. This from someone who managed to avoid driving until I was ???? 32, I think. My husband insisted ( 2nd. marriage ) and I finally gave in. Well, let me tell you.....I've never been without a car since and I'm 68. Never had a ticket or an accident ( have been in a couple not my fault ) and truly can't imagine a life where I couldn't take myself where I wanted to go. I do know though, that we all face a time when it is TIME and I don't look forward to it.
I recall the day my dad quit driving. He had just bought a new car not 6 months before. I was riding home with him to his and Mom's house....10 miles from where I lived. Going to have dinner there and so I left my car home and rode with Dad and Dh would come after work. Just a few minutes into the 15 minutes or so ride that it took......I could see that Dad was edgy for some reason. When he pulled up in his drive-way......he turned to me and said, if I want to sell this car, would you help me. I said of course I would.......and that was the last day he drove. Can't recall his age exactly but probably mid 70's. My dad was extremely hard of hearing so I think whatever came over him that day he instantly must have seen it as permanent and not fixable in any way. In hind-sight.....I think he was likely half terrified all the way home to his house. This was something he had been perfectly comfortable with all of his life.
I hope Sandra.....that maybe you will have a bit more improvement and be able to keep going.
Hope you all had a fantastic day.
Peace and love
Jackie0 -
We don't receive wisdom, we must discover it for ourselves after a journey that no once can take for us or spare us.
Marcel Proust.0 -
Jackie.... I remember riding with my Mom.... in her 70's on the San Francisco highways..... She looked just terrified.... She didn't have peripheral vision, so it made it really hard for her to drive..... BUT the funny thing is, she would NOT let me drive her car..... only my Brother, because "he was the boy in the family."
Don't ask. But after she passed away, Dad would let me drive her car.... Then we gave it to Dad's old black buddy, "Jim" when Dad passed away. He and Dad were just NUTS! They were neighbors, and got such a kick out of yelling and screaming obscenities at each other clear down the block! So Jim took care of Dad, after Mom died, and I was in Denver. Those two hooligans would go to their favorite bar together.... and just spend so much of their days with each other.
Even when they would see each other in the Safeway, they would yell across the whole store, "What the H are you doing here, you black B@$$$$$! All the clerks would just laugh! They KNEW those two! And they loved each other. Old Jim helped my Brother and I with a neighborhood give-away when Dad passed.
Looking back on it now, I don't know how we did it.
Mom just kept driving though! She even drove herself to the Doctor appt. at Kaiser.... THEY said she needed to go to emergency, because her CHF was acting up.... blah blah! But she had DRIVEN there! So then an ambulance took her to San Francisco.... heart surgery, stroke, and she never came back home again.
I know I shouldn't blame "them" but I do. If they just would have left her alone, with her meds! I don't see a "reason" for anything.0 -
Sandra giving up driving is giving up u'r independence and it's a horrible feeling. I can still drive just no car LOL-but it doesn't bother me really.
And Chevy I'm glad u got a chance to know u;r dad differentky as an adult--things change and u probably got the best years so u and u'r brother were lucky. I have to say I was always a daddy's girl so getting older with hime was just an addition to all the time we had together. It always made us laugh how when I'd wak in a room my dad would hear my voice and get so happy, and sometime he's think my sister's voice was me and then when he found out it was her he'd just say Oh thats' OK-no smile-But my mom lit up when my sister walked in so it all worked out--and of course the boys were boys and the oldest got the most attention and none of us really cared, it didn't hurt any of us. Oh we're really reminiscing OK-I do love that thos reading about families and the dynamics of the kids---US hhaha
BBL0 -
Welcome Widdershins to our entertaining and supportive thread.
I was so glad to get the book referrals! I love to read and have written down your suggestions. I just finished Fly Away by Kristin Hannah. It was a sequel to her Firefly Lane and I didn't think it was as good as her first book. I have just started Running from the Law by Lisa Scottoline. She's a pretty good mystery author. One of my friends told me that if you like The Help, you'd love The Kitchen House by Kathleen Grissom. It is her debut novel and I've got it on the hold list at the library.
My chiropractor/naturalist has my back fixed up for now. I'm sure you're right, Doc Chevy. I imagine that I'll go along pretty good for awhile and then wham! I'll get slammed with the problem again.
Jackie, the Indiana Covered Bridge Festival is in Parke County. The main towns are Bridgeton, Mansfield, and Rockville. They are filled with vendors and craft makers. I bought lots of unique Christmas presents. It sounds like you had a good day with your cousin!
It's cool and gloomy here today and we had snow flurries this morning.....now that's just not right!!! It shouldn't be snowing in Illinois in October. What's wrong with you Chevy? I thought you were going to keep that white stuff out there with you for a while longer!!! :-)
mommarch....loved the picture of the broom making. How long does it take an experienced broom maker to actually make a broom?
Welcome back bonnets. I missed you!
Well I have a crockpot full of chicken and noodles waiting for dinner and I need to get off here and fix some sides to go with it. It smells so good in the house. It's a new recipe that I've been anxious to try....and no, Ms. Betty Crocker here did NOT make the noodles from scratch.
Catch you all later!0 -
After handle is ready it takes about 30 minutes. We have to go out and harvest the handle from the desert floor, sand them and them dip them in varnish. If the handle is Choya cactus it will take several hours just to prepare the handle. It is Unique. We had an RV travel group in yesterday of 44 people, had a good day. I stayed home today and did the floor in the kitchen and a few other things. Just can not do what I used to. So I pace myself.
Hugs to all0 -
Live your truth. Express your love. Share your enthusiam. Take action towards your dreams. Walk your talk. Dance and sing to your music. Embrace your blessings. Make today worth remembering.
Steve Miraboli0 -
mommarch isn't that the most absolute truth. Was talking to some others I know a short while back and lamenting all the variety of things I could do in a couple of hours time. Multi-tasking like nobody's business. I think my multi-tasking is non-existent.....or has become can I even remember what I need to do. Sometimes even a list doesn't help me because I can't do things in the order I've written them. Sigh !!!!
I know at this age we are allowed to be less than we were but I miss the orderliness that I had in life and the ability to fit in lots of un-planned things.
Very chilly here today. Frost last night so we should start seeing some of those beautiful rich red leaves turning on the trees. The summer here was one of the better ones actually so I'm going to miss that part, but I do like all the seasons pretty much and like it chilly for when we have to be out in the yard dealing with the mounds of leaves that fall to the ground and other Fall chores.....putting up the summer yard decorations.
Hope you all have a fabulous Friday. I'm working tonight instead of tomorrow night so that is good for me. Tomorrow night is our little Halloween parade with 117 entries. For a town of 14,000 the three hour parade is almost too much. Biggest problem....I think it is going to be a really COOL three hours spent watching it.
See you all later.
Peace and love
Jackie0 -
Ah mommarch....now I know why you were hunting for choya cactus! Sounds like a fascinating process.
Believe it or not, I actually wrapped some Christmas packages today. I don't get as much accomplished anymore either so I start early and try to wrap as I go. I love the shopping but hate the wrapping. My little grandsons gave me some good ideas this year. That's great because two of them have birthdays that are close to Christmas so I try to get birthday presents at the same time. That way I can take them when we go and save postage which can often add up to the cost of one or two presents.
Brrrrr....it's cold out there again today. I need to get moving and take some library books back!
Everyone have a great weekend!0 -
Good Morning--I'm nice and cozy in my room, I went outside and when I came back I told my DD chit it's cold out--well that's how I felt anyway. So I'm appreciating my Katie-Kat and my comfy room more now.
I had my hair cut the other day and I enjoy that so much--cuz I keep it short now and it has to be cut a lot so all I have to do is ask my DD to do it and she's done in less than 5 minutes, so her school paid off for the family anyway.0 -
Tuesday, Wed., & Thurs. I accomplished some of my list, today was a disaster. We had to go to Alpine which is a 90 mile round trip, we ate lunch at a cafe here in town, it was awful. By the time I got home I crawled under my electric blanket and naped a bit. Up now feel a little better, I am going back to taking the Tamoxifen at night.
Was a pretty day here today. Need to fix some little something for supper and finish up dishes and run dishwasher.
Hope all are well.0 -
Ritajean, wrapping presents in OCTOBER!!! Isn't that against the law or something? (I'm secretly quite impressed.) I thought I was ahead of the game because I bought my first Christmas present -a Duck Dynasty t-shirt for my husband, but you win the prize! This is going to be such a strange Christmas. I've always enjoyed finding just the right gifts for everyone but this year there is no money. Since I had to quit work and apply for Social Security 19 months before my full retirement date, I get a reduced amount. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy to have it, but to have our family income drop so drastically so quickly has been a...shall we say, challenge. Ah, life...it's always something.
I had another fill in my tissue expander yesterday. Still completely painless at 680 cc's. My chest usually feels tight a few hours later, but it's minor and gone by morning. The plastic surgeon is pleased and thinks this may have been my last fill. He will see next week if I need to "top off the tank" or not. He said I can have surgery this time next month. Lovely news! I was afraid all this would drag on into 2014.
Warm sunny 80 degree day in San Antonio today. A friend I haven't seen in a couple of months called today and we met for lunch. It was great to see her and have a laugh. The restaurant had rhubarb pie so I was in heaven! It was such a nice day and good to get out of the house for something besides a doctor's appointment. Hope you all have a great weekend.0 -
Sandra, my husband would have been in heaven with rhubarb pie, too. The man is crazy about rhubarb, which doesn't seem to grow down south. It must need cold weather. He grew up in a Chicago suburb, and rhubarb grew in his back yard. His mother cooked it in various ways, always with sugar, of course.
I'm off to the farmer's mkt in a nearby town. Then I'll stop at a supermarket that has an honest-to-goodness butcher and better prices on meat than the bigger supermarkets. My niece with the three picky eaters (2 girls, 1 boy) will be at my mother's house for noon dinner tomorrow so I'll cook some spaghetti sauce this afternoon. With ground meat not meatballs! They don't like meatballs! Which are made with the same ground meat that meat sauce is made from. And I won't use diced tomatoes because they don't like tomatoes but they like sauce made with tomato sauce! GRRRRR....
I guess I have my nerve. I won't touch any food with raw onions in it and yet I cook with lots of onions, finely chopped so you can't see big blobs of onion.
Happy Saturday to everyone.0 -
The potential of the average person is lke a huge ocean un-sailed, a mew continent un-explored, a world of possibilities waiting to be released and channeled toward some grat good.
Brian Tracy0 -
Carole...so funny. We like what we like and I think ( it doesn't affect me much ) that some people are discerning enough to "notice" flavors in a different way with the same item....like the tomatoes versus, tomatoes in a sauce.
I know I was much more like that when I was young. I would only eat blue bell Bologna. There was another cheaper brand and being poor......my mother always tried --- even to the point of saving the Blue Bell wrapper and putting the cheaper bologna in it. Leave it to me ---- it never worked. I knew instantly.
Mothers and Mother Nature can not get it over a kid who loves only Blue Bell. Mom never totally understood that my 'palate' could be that refined when I was so young. Well, you know, it had a little to do with a texture that was different along with the flavor. Nothing ( no condiment ) could mask it.
Anyway......though more work to and for you, what an extraordinary thing......to cater to people by fixing exactly what THEY want. You know how to do a great good. I'm patting you on the back right now.
Hope you all have a fantastic Saturday.
Peace and love
Jackie0 -
Good Morning--Oh Jackie I like that one---I'm always telling my GS that there is nothing he can't do and the world is like a buffet and most poor suckers are starving to death--cuz they limit themselves.
Carole u'r DH sounds like someone in my family LOL we always had rhubarb and my mom would cookit (with sugar) and sometimes mix strawberries with them--good stuff.
OK I might wear something else tonite--My DD2 found a pair of big round sparkly pink colored lenses sun glasses and with all my jewelry and sparkly clothes I could go as Dame Elton June jst another thought--I can also wear my sparkly purple wax for my hair in streaks.0 -
You all are so funny! SO glad I found you. My husband and I are off today on a little adventure to Fredericksburg, about an hour and a half away in the pretty Hill Country. It's a lovely little town with a strong German history and lots of authentic old houses and businesses. They are having a Texas Food & Wine Festival. This is grape harvest time in south central Texas so all the vineyards will have booths. Music will be playing everywhere, food booths will fill the block with smells to good to resist, and artists & craftsmen will be displaying their wares. The weather is beautiful so it should be a nice day.
Some of the difficulty people have with food is texture. I've never known anyone who didn't like bananas but recently saw a guy in a reality show on t.v. who despised the texture of bananas. I think your example of onions is a common one. You like the flavor but not the texture.
My husband was an only child (and a rich kid) who was doted on by his grandmother. Whatever he wanted he could have. He remembers asking for something, getting it, taking one bite, saying he didn't like it, and having his grandmother ask what he wanted next. He was a meat and potatoes guy when we met but soon changed because he went into the military. (Viet Nam) The men were hungry and tired and either ate what there was or had nothing. No grandmothers were there to coddle them and there was no such thing as variety 44 years ago.
Kids go through phases and taste buds change. I remember when 2 yr old child #1 would only eat one food for a week then she was on to another one. The pediatrician said leave her alone and don't make a big deal about it. Continue to serve a variety of foods (plus a vitamin) to toddlers/preschoolers and they will balance out their diets over a month's time. It worked! The doc said so many parents get frantic about what small kids eat and that's where some picky eaters come from. Meal time becomes a battle of wills and the pattern is set.
I was the oldest of 7 kids in a poor household in the south. Six of us ate whatever was put in front of us and were glad to have it. But one brother was different. As a little kid he had refused to eat what everyone else was eating so my mother would hold his nose, wait for him to open his mouth to take a breath, and shove in a spoonful of peas. He would of course spit them out which made my mother madder and madder. He is still a picky eater today.
Once they were out of the baby/toddler stage and ready for school, my children had to eat a "no thank you" portion, which was 3 tiny pieces of something, usually a vegetable, that could be eaten in one child-sized bite. For the first time, they were about to go out into a world of school lunches prepared differently than they were used to. I knew that taste buds change rapidly during the 12 school-age years and if they didn't like carrots today, they might like them next week. They could dunk that green bean in whatever else was on their plate or hide it in their next bite of mashed potatoes, but they had to try it. We never made a big deal out of it and sure enough, we often heard one of them say they never liked xxx before but do now. They certainly had their preferences in the school lunch rotating menu, but they ate some of everything so no one ever went hungry at school. Now it's different...kids have a buffet at lunch and get to choose anything including a double helping of French fries and a coke. I wonder if we have more picky eaters today?0 -
Sandra, Have fun today. I remember DH speaking German with the gas station attendant when we stopped for a fill up. My German great great grandmother loved to cook. She would make something special and hang a red ribbon in her window. That was an invitation for great grandmother and I to go taste samples. I described her stove as big and black and her making a special cookie. The family looked at each other and said that was the stove at the farm. I was probably 2-3yo when she moved into town.
All my food problems were texture related. For instance, I detest hominy but love grits and polenta. My 2nd GS was evidently a clone because he had the same texture problems.0 -
Doing some reorganizing this morning, threw out a lot of stuff from our travels. Need to get around to washing some of my Depression glass collection, one of these days, when the urge actively strikes:o In the 50's and sunny, but with the wind feels a lot colder.
Carole, must be something about Chicago and rhubarb. My parents had a patch in the back yard when I was a kid. I like it, but cud never get any of my family to enjoy it! They also grew asparagus, which as a kid I didn't like, but enjoy now.
Sandra, my Dad lived in Fredericksburg. We always enjoyed visiting him and staying at b&b's. Close enough to Austin to make the visit when we visited my daughter there. Cinnamon Bun heaven. Stayed at a great little ranch b&b in Doss. Also like to visit Kerrville. Always enjoyed Fredericksburg during peach time, mmmmmmm!
Enjoy your fall Saturday.0 -
Oh Sandra u'r day sounds perfect and if u have the weather on u'r side it's even better, And I love how u write so expressive I can picture it. It's beautiful. Being Italian we always had that type of food and the house was open for anyone anytime cuz there was always enough. Not that we had money it was cheap food and much of it was made or grown by hand so it was not expensive and if u didn't really like it--to bad. My mom and Dad were both good cooks and we did like almost everything even veggies, cuz that was a big thing at our house, Now I like it way to much, it's my problem. And yrs ago I still cooked a lot of Italian cuz that's what I knew, but my kids have branched out but still like Italian. Well I hope everyone has a wonderful day and Joey and I are still planning on my other DD's party tonite. So I hope it's fun fr him0 -
I love rhubarb too. We have it in our yard here. It does need cold weather. My uncle in Okla couldn't grow it there. It grew in Kansas tho.0 -
I have rhubarb here, too and I love it, but I'm one of those strange people who deoesn't like bananas....not even banana cream pie. I think they are slimy and I have tried and tried to eat them because they are so good for you.
The Texas wine fest sounds like so much fun! Sure wish I lived closer! Have fun, Sandra!
The leaves are falling rapidly here. It's really a strange Fall because many of the falling leaves are still green. We do not have the brilliant colors this year because it took so long to get a frost. The red maple in my back yard has still not turned colors and the leaves are still all intact! Hmmm.....
Well I need to check the laundry and keep it going. I have a few loads that I need to get done today!
Everyone have a good weekend.0 -
I remember when I met my DH, we would have dinner at his family's house.... And I loved his Italian Mom's spaghetti sauce! But now, like 56 years later, I could MAKE it the same, but our tastes have changed so much! We just bought a can of garlic marinara sauce at the DOLLAR store, and it was delicious! Dang, I couldn't believe it! I made Rigatoni's, and will have left-overs tonight with tenderized pork cutlets....
I always loved Pineapple Rhubarb pie also! My Mom and Grandma used to make it....! I used to grow Rhubarb, but gave the tubors away last year, to my Chicken neighbors....Ha! When I make a cake or pie, we always have sooooooo much left over! DH and I usually eat a piece or two, then take some to our DD, and then the Squirrels seem happy with the rest!
Wren, I remember my step-grandmother used to make her own Sauerkraut after they grew their own cabbage. She LOVED cooking, even when she was in her 80's! And they always had Bacon and eggs for breakfast, and Grandpa would put a piece of bread in his plate, then cover it with canned-milk, and put sugar on it for dessert!
He loved his own rolled cigarettes, his whiskey and to drive Grandma nuts.... ha, ha! She used to make him sit in his rocker, with a big 9X12 cake pan on his lap, so he could roll his cigarettes, light them, and then the burnt pieces would fall in the pan, OR on his shirt!
How FUN to remember this stuff!0 -
Thank you for the welcome! I'm now almost 4 weeks out from my double mastectomy (nipple and skin sparing) and still in really annoying, distracting pain. I've tried to cut back on the Vicodin I've been on for over half that time, but can't stand the pain level going up. It's worst over the places that the drain tubing ran, but the main incision under my right side (cancer side) is hurting a lot today too.
The skin around the outer edges of the tissue expanders doesn't look good either. On one spot, the skin *died* and I have a large open sore that has to be treated with sulfa/silver cream twice a day. The rest of the skin looks weird--almost as though it's tanned/sun-damaged, though it's not. It also pulls all funny if I lift my arms.
Doesn't help that my (Kaiser) plastic surgeon is terrible about responding to either calls or emails. I get really depressed and feel as though he just doesn't want to know. In exams, he just kind of skips over my questions about why I'm still having such bad pain--like he's in denial or something. I'm trying my damnedest to be assertive and insist that something be done about it, but so far nothing has worked.
I've read so many posts here, but not seen anyone else with the problems I'm having this far out. I'm wondering if it has anything to do with my age (66) or with the fact that I'm Type 2 diabetic?0 -
I don't know too much about the issues your speaking about Widdershins, but wondering if you could get better responses from your Oncologists nurse. Often they know a great good deal about these things. and also as they are quite used to the Dr. ( I hope ) may know how to get him to address your problems with at least some semblance of a bedside manner.
I only had a lumpectomy and 3 lymph nodes out so have no reality on drains or anything like that. I would though think in general anyone with Type 11 diabetes could have healing issues that a lot of women would not have. It does sound like pain management is lasting longer than I would expect since you can't go with anything less.
I hope someone in your Dr's office can help you sort out these things. Does your office have a Avon patient navigator. She might be able to step in quite easily. I talked to the one in my surgeon's office long after they had quit seeing me and she kept my questions answered and told me what I needed to know, to do, or just what to expect at each corner I came too.
Hoping some one else will read your note and have other suggestions too. You should not have to have so many un-answered questions and I'm all for Oncologists who will offer good, positive realistic assurances to women. They take care of many of us, but we don't see this everyday and certainly not in ourselves.
Peace and love
Jackie0 -
Widder,
I've followed your progress on other threads. Most people are feeling much better at 3 weeks and you are past that stage with little if any progress. You may need to see a pain specialist. You should not be on narcotics a month after surgery. They are very addictive.
Some people think they should be absolutely pain free 24/7 and keep on taking narcotics way too long. When the drug wears off, their pain is worse and worse. Let the pain specialist work with you to get it down to a manageable stage where you are merely uncomfortable most of the time. That will be a huge step for you. There will be good days and not so good days, but you should see progress from week to week. Many people have gone back to work at your stage or earlier but it seems to take a good six weeks for most of us to feel back to normal. We older ladies heal a bit more slowly.
If you are being a whiney baby, we on this support group could "smack you around a little" and try to get you to snap out of it but if you have a real medical reason for your pain, the doctor needs to help you. It's beyond our scope here on this forum. We can sympathize and send hugs and prayers your way, though. Diabetics have more trouble healing but I don't know if that applies to Type 2.0 -
You know Carole I do not like meat balls either. Really do not know why0 -
Spent this morning in the desert harvasting yucca for broom handles. We have a festival to be at on Nov. 9th, in Edgewood, Tx they have around 5000 visitors to their heritage village. They called a few months ago and begged that we could come. Hope it all goes well.0
