MIDDLE-AGED WOMEN 40-60ish
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Welcome Juannelle, we certainly have great women on this thread and we get some pretty exciting conversations going. Hope all goes well with your testing today!
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OmahaGirl, thanks for the welcome. I am on several threads, but this one seemed very interesting. It is about life and I like that. I am on page 9 reading the posts, so I will be at that awhile, but I feel that I am getting to know each one of you.
Juannelle
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Another post about the age thing...I was going through Wendy's drive-up window, and the cashier asked me if I'd like to buy coupons for frosties. I said "no, thanks," and she proceeded to tell me, "Surely you'd want to buy some for your grandchildren." I think the look on my face must have stopped her, and she added "or nieces and nephews." I am 45 years old, for goodness sake! Surely I don't look old enough to have grandchildren, although I realize that it is biologically possible...
I have to give kudos to my hubby. He was wonderful during treatment and not only took care of me but also drove our daughter everywhere, grocery shopped and did mounds of laundry. Fortunately I didn't have any nausea or vomiting issues - I don't think he would have done so well with that. We probably would have had TWO messes to clean up!
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Good afternoon everyone! I am from Mass also - from Hubbardston which is just nw of Ffitchburg/Leominster toward NH border.Right near Mt Wachusett. Jean151 and I r both txed at mgh by same doc - small world!
My daughter was born in Lowell- we lived there for a while so I know Chelmsford pretty well Where r u getting tx? Deb? Did u go local? I tried but mds around here were really scary - I knew more about bc from surfing the web so I truck into Boston (won't for radiation tho-2 far away)
wish u all well - Valerie
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Leominster...Does it still hold claim to being the pioneer plastics capital of the world? It's been a while since I was in the neighborhood, so maybe they no longer hold the distinction.
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My gosh, you stay off this board a day or two and it's an hours worth of reading!!! This has got to be the best thread ever, or is it the best age ever??? I can't begin to remember everyone's names. Please excuse me for that. I'm getting the book mentioned for sure. A man is questionable, but the book for sure!
Wnt to BS Tuesday and this is Th. Had partial MX on LB so am definitely having MX on it. After some lively discussion after hearing i need sonogram and possible biopsy on RB we have agreed in three months to do a BiMX in Jan.
He finally understood that I cannot afford to wait until i need rads or chemo, which so far if MX's don't find anything else I don't. I cannot afford time off work. Besides, listening to all the treatments available and trying to decide.......I'm more than willing to joing the so called "lucky, guilty, whatever" group.
Have to wait 3 mos. to let my body get over trauma of partial MX. Fine. I'll go into training again, just like i did for a few wks before the other. I'm using this time to get as healthy and strong as possible to fight whatever may be found. I'm hoping it's no more than DCIS which is where i'm at now. Why in God's name would some male dr. think that rushing to proactivity is not smart when two of my sisters, who are fine now, didn't have that chance is possibly not thinking about this enough? I've been thinking about it since my grandmother aunt and first sister got it. Men! My breasts sure must be more important to them than they are to me. My life is important to me and if i ever do find a man.....(was married once for 20 yrs)....who really loves me, he won't care. I know this because it wouldn't matter to me if i loved him if something was not perfect.
I do believe we get smarter as we get older, and more accepting of ourselves as well. I really like men, i do. All there funny quirks, and i enjoyed being married. I also enjoy the freedom of not being married as well. Havent had a date in ages with breasts, so what's the big deal w/o them? I'm happy.
Some of the posts here are so darn funny! Love the exercise tip! All of you, even if i'm bad at names, are great!!! Keep on posting because i'm sympathetic, can go where you need me to be, but i also love to laugh and this thread does laugh.
Elimar, thank you so much for starting this.
If you want to call me lucky, go ahead. love to all and well wishes. (Hoping i stay lucky)!
Marian
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I got my double mast 6 days after diagnosis. Why would I want to wait? I got them both at once so I only had to heal once. When I had to go in for an incision revision I was strapped down talking to the "team" in the OR telling them how well I was doing without breasts when another doc walked in and said, "Breasts? Breasts are so important!" They put me under as I was laughing......
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If you have just made your way to this thread, let it be known that we've reached the 1000th post milestone. Anyone is welcome to go back and start at the beginning, but as a public service I thought I would issue a recap of some topics past, in no particular order: the shock of the Dx, friends and family that don't "get it," red wine (with and without Cheetos,) kids, grandkids, husbands who act like kids, going thru' various treatments with our ever-changing emotions, writing a country song about it, Pinktober, pink hoo-hoos, no insurance, rads tans/burns, Honey Crisp apples, cute pets, our elderly dads and moms, homecoming mums, insomnia, hot flashes, hot wea... (you know, the "W" word, has it's own tv channel,) ...this thread is a real cornucopia of cancer experiences with some crazy ornamental gourds thrown in just for fun.
As this threads founder, I have to take the opportunity to thank you all for keeping my spirits up during my rads Tx over the past few months. I may need some further support once I get the Tamox. coursing thru' my body. I hope I have gotten a few of you thru' a tough spot with a chuckle now and then.
So many of the posts have been memorable for me. You might wonder (or not) if I have a favorite? I'm still gonna tell you. My FAVORITE post was back around the first week, a woman was having some difficulty at the start of her chemo and she asked for support from a minister. He suggested that she "visit a labyrinth!" Oh my, that's just an instant classic! Was she British? It doesn't matter. I cannot count the times when I'm stressing that I have now said, "Maybe I better go find myself a labyrinth." The woman that posted never posted again after that day...They are pretty hard to get out of.0 -
Wow, elimar. You are the perfect thread hostess, lady!
A little cat who has been hanging out around here had kittens in my crawlspace. Only two, but those kittens have been down there at least a couple of weeks. They're so cute! The queen is so proud and she is such a good mom.
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Hello ladies, just wanted to check in to see how everyone is doing. I am still in the process of trying to go back and read all the posts, but boy will that take awhile. It may become my full time job. That would be an OK job, it just wouldn't pay much.
Juannelle
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Congrats to Mama cat!
Yes, Leominster IS the plastics city (I would never have copped to it but they seem proud) AND the birthplace of Johnny Appleseed . I wonder how many cities lay claim to either of those things?
I also have enjoyed this thread - it has gotten me through the shock of dx, recovery from surgery and thus far thru the beginning of chemo. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. Valerie
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seems to be a lot of massachusetts people here, grew up on the north shore. Anyone know how they really determine clusters? No one ever asked me my birthplace. Thanks for reminding me about the red wine-think I could use a glass or two
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I just qualified a few weeks ago to join this thread - I'm now 40 - LOL!!!
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Congratulations, kittycat! And welcome!
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Queenlurker what part of Mass ? Where r u getting tx?
It seems to me with 1 of 8 women getting BC the whole country is a cluster!
Valerie
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Is everyone getting ready for Halloween? I have painted my nails black and I am getting a buzz cut tomorrow. I can go as a witch or Uncle Fester. It is really a hard decision. But somehow I will make it.
Bought my wigs today. My hair has not started coming out, but it will next week, so I am trying to be ready. Don 't want to get caught short.......
Hope everyone has a booooo of a weekend.
Juannelle
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I don't have to paint my nails black, they already are from the chemo....actually green, purple and black.
KittyKat.....aahh, to be 40 again.
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Marybe, I have been reading that painting your nails black will help them not fall out. I thought with this being Halloween, that I would give it a try. I actually kind of like it. I am very light complected and I thought it would be very harsh, but it isn't. At least that is my opinion.
Juannelle
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valerie
Grew up in M'head but have been here near Phoenix for 25 years. Very thankful for the warmer weather.
My halloween outfit will be my uniform for work. Does a pedicure count? Yup, chemo is frightful. (toenails are still very scary looking) but went with a boring beige color. Hope you all have a safe and fun day
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Great Forum! I will try to make time to go read some back posts, but what a great bunch of ladies. Jan
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Happy Halloween Ladies, my 11 year old niece call me tonight to ask me if I know why ghosts don't have babies? I said I have no idea and she replied " because they have hollow weenies! I don't know what it is about that joke ( I have heard it before) but it always makes me laugh.
Be Good Witches and careful out there on your broom's.
Jan, it is nice to meet you hope you will stay around and have some fun here in the middle.
Juannelle, you are being very brave and pro-active, you will remain very beautiful with or without hair (:
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Just a note, although it has been awhile since I was going through chemo, my doctor requested that I not paint my nails, as they can gauge certain health aspects by looking at your nailbeds and your nail growth. I never did paint them, and I never lost my nails. He also requested that I cut my nails short to avoid any hangnail infections and such. I kept them medium length anyway.
You may really freak your doctor out when you come in with black nails!
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Freaked out doctors--what an amusing mental picture that gives me! It would be so nice for me to freak out a doctor rather than getting freaked out by something a doctor does or says. . .
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My nails are no longer infected or doing anything new and actually can see new growth, but they are still loose where they are discolored. I developed an allergy of sorts to nailpolish as I got older. Whenever I would use it, my nails would then get odd when I took it off and peel....so I just got out of the habit of using it altogether. Now, however, it might not be a bad idea since they are pretty much a mess anyway and I would not have people asking Oooh, what did you do to your nail....it's always the right thumb the notice because it is the worst one. I then display them all and say Chemo and watch the shock register on their face. I was taught to keep my mouth shut if my question or comment was going to cause embarassment or hurt someone's feelings, but now people are so blunt . I was also told Don't stare at that person, Honey when I was little. I was at the vet;s the other day and this receptionist whom I dislike anyway says to me My, that certainly is a dramatic hair cut you have there. and I said I just finished 6 months of chemo and it's growing in. Maybe she didn't mean anything and I am not ashamed to walk around looking the way I do now and have even gotten some compliments, but it pissed me off when she said that. I am just really happy to no longer be wearing a wig.
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Marybe, people deserve to be embarrassed and shamed when they have asked a stupid question or made a stupid comment. I thought everyone was being trained to be sensitive to the difference of each individual and be accepting of the differences. I know that is what we have been through at work and it doesn't always work out that way.
After today, I will be right there with you on the stares and comments. Reality sits in today.
Juannelle
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Just joined so I am still not completely sure how this works but here goes...
I've been "surfing the web" this morning trying to find out if I am going to lose my hair (due to Chemo) or not. I stumbled on this website and it's exactly what I was looking for! So cool! I love that I will be able to connect with so many women who, like me have been diagnosed with breast cancer. FYI, I am 40 with two young children (5 and 2) and I figured I'd start with a post on this forum (there appear to be quite a few).
Anyways, so my question is, will I lose my hair? I had my first chemo treatment (TC) 9 days ago and was thinking about shaving my head this weekend because I don't think I can bear to have it start falling out in "clumps". However, my husband is convinced that maybe I will be one of the few who don't experience this side effect and he doesn't want me to shave it. I have heard from a few people that the TC form of chemo ALWAYS makes your hair fall out, does anyone know if this is true?
So glad I found you all, I look forward to future communications. :-)
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Holly, I am out from my first tx the same as you. I talked to the NP this week and she said the hair should start coming out on day 14 or 15. She said if it doesn't, don't feel that I have dodged the bullet, it will come out. Every last hair on the body. She did say that we don't always lose the eyebrows and eyelashes, but they will thin. She said be very careful when removing your makeup and don't scrub the eye area.
I am getting mine buzzed today. This has sent me on a emotional roller coaster ride for several day. When the hair is gone, it makes everything so real.
Glad you found this thread, lots of information can be found here.
Have a happy boooooo day.
Juannelle
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Thanks for the note Juannelle, good advice about the washing the face part, I didn't think about the whole eyelash/eyebrow thing... Happy head shaving, I'll probably do mine tomorrow.
H
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Holly, What chemo are you on? I didn't lose my hair in clumps and it really did not start coming out until about the 23rd day. I remember they told me 14-21 days and on 21 I was running around pulling on my hair, saying Look, it's still there and isn't even coming out when I tug on it! Premature on my part. It never did come out totally.....oh, I was bald, but there were still a few hold on hairs here and there. I had one eyelash that did not fall out....it was very odd. And my eyebrows went last. Oh and the hair on my arms held on forever and that was hair I would ahve liked to be gone. Now it has been three months and I actually feel I have quite a bit of hair regrowth and know I posted earlier that people who did not know I was doing chemo thought I had it cut that way. Everyone said it would come back curly, but so far not a single curl. And really it was not so bad losing my hiar....but I first diagnosed in 1990 so I had a long time to prepare for losing my hair....especially since that was the frist question I asked way back when. Am I going to lose my hair? I did not shave my head since it came out gradually and I would brush it really well over the sink and get all the loose hairs out. When my pink scalp started showing I just wished it would get on with it and it was only then I went to my hairdresser and she evened it all up and cut it really short, but it was she who recommended I not just shave it all off. It just depends on how you feel about it....do whatever feels right for you. I hated wearing a wig and only did that because I kept working and didn't want to have to answer over and over again what was going on with me. Just keep telling yourself, This too shall pass and it will.
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Greeting new Mid-Age gals! Sending out some positive vibrations to those about to start their chemo. No, I did not go through it, but I have a mom who had aggressive weekly chemo for a whole year (not for B/C.) Soon I will be in the "Better Living Thru' Chemistry" club, when I get on the Tamox. in a couple weeks.
HOLIDAY SPECIAL! Halloween has always been a fun spooky holiday. We have so many other days to focus on all of our scary cancer stuff, would anyone care to digress with me today in a Holiday Special? If you have ever had any actual paranormal/ghostly experience (like your house going all Amityville, etc.) then tell about it. Otherwise, please join in my SURVEY ON SCARIEST MOVIE:
I don't like gore,so I have to go "old school" and say THE EXORCIST. Forget all the silly green vomit. To me, the scariest scene was when the young priest stepped out to get himself together, then when he re-enters the bedroom the old priest is collapsed on the floor, and Regan is out of her restraints and propped up on that bedpost. It cuts to her face and she has THAT EVIL LOOK, with her demonic smile and she makes a dry, almost soundless mocking laughter...OMG, I cannot even think about that evilness without getting goosebumps!
Your turn, offer ends at mignight.
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