MIDDLE-AGED WOMEN 40-60ish
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Meece, I actually think you are part of the gang...seems to me that a lot of the ladies on here are fortunate enough to have husbands who are dear or darling and devoted. Mine just doesn't fall into that category. I envy those of you who have happy relationships. My pets are my darlings. I saw this baseball cap yesterday that had Sleeps with Dogs embroidered on it. I think I will buy one for myself although now I am happy to say I have enough hair that I do not have to wear a hat or scarf or anything else.
Susan, The 4th time was the charm. I am happy for you
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Second-times-the-charm for me. That's when I was able to shift from D***head, to Dear-hearted husband. We're coming up on our 16th wedding anniversary in a few months!!!
Just yesterday I was having a stern talk with the father-of-my-children-sperm-donor (now, keep in mind that he has been dead and burried in the ground for over four years) and was not being spiteful, but just pointing out that I had SURVIVED him!
I suppose the conversation was more with God, because it entailed several parts of 'I don't know where you've kept the fellow? Certainly hell would have been too good for some of his unethical, immoral antics....... but there were also some endearing capabilities as well.' [Did I mention that he was an ordained minister?]
In any case, some day I may just write a NY Times best seller on that chapter of my life. It would be a real page-turner. Religion. Politics. Immorality. I figure I'll use a psuedo-name to spare our children the spotlight..... and give the royalties to my grandkids for their therapy.
The point being..... I've had both extremes. And I do mean EXTREMES.
This currrent relationship is my reward from heaven for having endured the unthinkable.
Hugs to anyone who is in a less than supportive relationship..... or has ever been in an untenable decade or more because of one.
I was so young, naieve, and without backbone.
That changed.
xx00xx00xx00xx
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All that pain we suffered because when someone told us they loved us we trusted them to keep us safe...not be the ones we had to protect ouselves from!
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I dealt with the D*** Head for nearly 22 years. I have cancer to thank for getting me out of that marriage. When I found my lump, I KNEW that I would die if I stayed where I was. EX had no sense of compassion for me. Once I had a severe kidney infection, and the Dr. wanted to hospitalize me, but I refused because I knew I had to care for my little children. Ex came into the bedroom and told me I'd better get well soon, because life goes on and there is stuff that needs to be done. He also had me up cooking dinner for our two toddlers, and him of course, 14 hours after I had given birth to #3. His excuse was that he didn't know where anything was.
DH is my reward for survivng BC.
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susan_CNY, you are starting my day with a laugh, to know we have a Biker-Mama in our midst!
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Dh had a motorcycle shortly after we started dating. When we got engaged I told him he needed to get a bigger bike if I was to ride on the back more frequently. I am happy being a back seat rider. That way I can see the scenery and not have to concentrate on anything more than not falling alseep and falling off.
My view
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Elimar-LOVE the snowman!
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My house doesn't have a single decoration up yet, so you see I have given some priority to my B/C sisters. I'm not too early with the home decor, but I can say that I got all my Christmas cards ready to go this week so I wasn't exactly slacking off.
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Meece, o.k., make that Two Biker-Mamas (and a partridge in a pear tree!)0
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I have always loved Xmas decorations and when I first looked at this house noticed the archways and thought Hmmmm, wouldn't those look nice with garlands around them. But for some reason I just can't get into decorating this year.....did get the tree up and banister and mantel decorated at my Dad's house, but nothing here. I have so many ornaments it takes me three days to do the tree...this is no exaggeration. But since I do not plan on entertaining or having anyone in, I just don't seem to be able to get inspired to dig out the boxes. I know all my doctors offices are expecting my cookies, but I don't seem to be in the mood for that either. I am not Bah Humbug, am just sort of blah for some reason. Fortunately my down moods do not last long. Maybe I need to watch some good old Xmas flicks. Anyone have a favorite?
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Do any of you know that song MotorCycle Mama by Harpo? Maybe it only made it in Europe, but I have it on a 45
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vroom vroom mama's!
I am almost a newly wed. I got married at 41 to a somewhat younger guy I met in Las Vegas. (Parasol down at the Wynn to be exact)
In my NYC "sex and the city" world of single jewish 40 somethings, getting married is considered a bit of a miracle. Sometimes I wonder if he was sent to me because the cancer was on it's way.
He is far from perfect (tonight I am cooking a roast he bought me as a Christmas gift!?!?!) but he's a good guy.
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A roast as a Christmas gift doesn't sound bad to me.....beats a ham in my opinion.
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I am married and the ringtone on my phone is "Someday my prince will come". Me and my husband are more roomates than marrieds, and that is fine with me. When I had my mast last year, he went to work! Thank God my girlfriends came to see me! You can always count on them. Anyway I would love to be happy and find my soul mate. It sure isn't the one I'm with now.
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Here's the two of us on our big green machine -- from our summer exploits:
Look carefully in the rear-view mirror to check that we are both wearing helmets.
Pretty cool picture -- quite by 'accident' ...... probably couldn't do that again if I tried. LOL
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Cookiegal, you made me laugh about the roast because my DD and I have a saying " oh no a surprise like roast?" when we tell each other we have a surprise.It comes from her saying once when she was a little girl "whats for dinner" and I replied it's a surprise and it was a roast, which she always hated.
There seems to be a theme going through this thread and I must join in saying how much I love the Christmas season and I own many decorations but I have not done any decorating at all, and I don't think I will, I am just too tired, or something...
In my 20's I had a 350 Harley, I loved riding that bike, it made me feel soooooo good.
Hope everyone is having a good weekend so far.
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I think I mentioned this on a different thread, but I usually decorate for Christmas the weekend after Thanksgiving. Since I was having surgery one week before Thanksgiving, I put up a few of my decorations on tables and shelves the day before surgery, and DH put up the tree the Saturday after surgery. Then after Thanksgiving, I sat back and opened the packages of ornatments, and handed them to my DH, DS and DSs GF and they put everything up on the tree. I have never decorated the tree that quickly! We even decorated our second tree....twice. We changed our mind on how we were going to decorate it after we had it done.
We have been puttering getting the outdoor decs up. We have a neighbor who liked what we've done so much, they copied us. Except for the color of lights. I think it s beautiful! Once you have some decorations up, it gets you in the mood to do more.
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Oh, I actually did baking today. I am exhausted as I haven't yet healed from surgery. I only made three types of goodies so far. But I am pretty proud of myself. Molasses Cookies, peanut butter bon bons and rolled sugar cookies.
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Hi Ladies.
I just found your 40-60 thread tonight. I'll be the big 5-0 in January! Just finished 6 rounds of TAC on December 1 and I am glad to be done! Wohoo! I'll try to keep up here but my chemobrain won't do so good trying to read 55 pages. You all seem to have a fun group of gals.
Thanks for being here
Navy
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Welcome, Navymom! Most of us have experienced chemocrain at one time or another, maybe that's why we have so much fun here. This place is tolerant!
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welcome navy..I know exactaly what you mean about chemo brain...it seems to get worse as each day passes. glad you could join us.
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I have spoken to my onc, because my chemo brain didn't leave completely. She said she could refer me to a different dr., but for the life of me, I cannot remember which type of dr. she said! My memory blanks out simple every day words at times. I could be asking you to take out the trash, and I hesitate because I cannot get the word for trash out. I am frustrated. My onc says it is rare, but not unheard of that the brain doesn't recover 100% from chemo. So my family just tolerates it.
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Meece...I have the same issues, sometimes I write down what I will say on the phone, of course only when Im calling some important place. I thought it was age related since I am 58.
Could it be chemo brain, i think I like that reason better than blaming my age.But its over 4 years now.
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Hey, Seyla. It has been five years since end of chemo for me. Sometimes I just blurt out any word at all just to get past the block. I have had two CT scans of my brain and there was nothing there...ha ha. That's my joke. No there is one tiny lession, but nothing to worry about. When my radiolost first saw it, he indicated it could be brain cancer. I am so glad he was wrong.
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Meece, I'm 55 and do that hesitation thing with words daily. It is frustrating. My biggest fear is my dad has mid-stage alzheimers, so I feel like between that, left-over chemo brain and the greatest factor-mom to a 15 year old!!! I'm losing my mind & my ability to speak coherently!
Joni
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Joni,
I think kids suck your brain out, and it takes the rest of our lives to ain it back.
My onc did tell me to keep my brain active. I play Soduku every day, and like playing some of the word games here as well. I like crossword puzzles, and I have a Nintendo DS and play Brain Age. It is frustrating though, isn't it?
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Years ago when my daughter was about that age. I was so mad and these are the words came out from my mouth. GO LAY AN EGG. She stopped looked at me thinking i said the worse thing to her. To be honest they just came out from my mouth had absolutely no meaning good or bad.
Now that she is an adult we laugh about it.
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Thank you everyone for the welcome. Okay meece 18 months. Yes! Love holiday desserts...so many to choose from. Have to think about that one. This year for some reason I am craving pumpkin pie. I could eat whole one by myself.
Faith I have been around. 
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ebann, when I was in kindergarten Santa brought me a genaric baby doll. I named her after my and my best friend's middle names. Her name was Elizabeth Ann! There is a memory stimulating moment for me.
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