You know youre a cancer patient when....
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When You have so many pills, it takes 10 times
to get them all down, and then you have to rest
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When you absentmindedly give your phone to your 9 year old so she can show a phone pic of herself to her teacher, and she scrolls back to a self portrait you took of your intact breasts in the hospital bathroom mirror right before surgery. She holds it up in front of the teacher and says What's this Mom?!!! (Luckily, this was the female art teacher, so no arrests were made)
On the same phone camera roll, you also have a number of self portraits of your head in various states of hair loss, culminating in the scowling Uncle Fester pic.
There are also several sad pics you sent the DH from the wig shop, including the one where he told you that you look like Howard Stern in drag, and you couldn't get too mad because he had a point.
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YKYACP when your standing in front of the private locker room mirror swirling your Auquaphor on your sore red nipple after your 24th round of RADS & the door you never forgot to lock opens. Luckily it says " Women " on the outside. She said oh sorry & shut the door quickly. I wasn't embarrassed.....but later I was thinking Mmmmm I hope she didn't think I was playing tiddley winks solo in the locker room! Lol! Never had I forgot to lock & the door handle was never tried in ALL the 5 weeks of RADS.....just so tired. Go figure! Either that or I've decided to become an exobitionist & my conscious mind didn't know it yet! Hahaha!
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Your breasts have been looked at and handled more by strangers in the past 3 weeks
than by your husband of 19 years0 -
When You are flat and people think you
have very little breasts when you have none
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YKYACPW how you will live through this is all you ever think and plan and do
........ all day you thought it was Thursday and it was Friday
......... every day you intend to pick the beans and it never happens
dog's nails, same thing...... washing front windows same thing..... making dr appts same thing.
in other words, memory crap
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YKYACP when chemo brain strikes again and you forget the oatmeal simmering on the stove and scorch your brand new copper-bottom pot that you bought to replace the one you boiled dry while making hard boiled eggs last month.
Got to it before it was ruined but OMG I've only had this saucepot for three days!
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Badger - LOL!
I set up to three timers when I put stuff on the stove. I set the timer on the stove, the timer ofn the microwave, and I take the egg timer when me if going back to my office. Haven't burned anything in several months.
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YKYACP, when you spend 3 times the amount in hair products then you saved over the year in shampoo and no haircuts.
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When you get hot and tired of wearing your wig so you snatch it off your head at a stoplight and then look over to see the horrified look of the person in the car next to yours that watched you do it!
Disgusted at the dumb teens who stand outside a store smoking thinking they're cool so you walk along and take off your wig and rub your bald head and look eerily into their eyes.
I guess i did alot of hair removal ...0 -
@ wyattsmom - good thing you were at a stop light as the shock might have caused an accident - lol
Hope that in that group of teens, at least one of them got the hint!
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When You ask for treatment at the hairdresser
for dry skin and its on your head, Ive had it done.
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You are continuously 'adjusting' your foobie and think nothing of reaching over and moving it around inside or outside your blouse............
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You forget that when your trying to get used to the "feel" of your newly reconstructed breast that it's not generally considered to be good manners to rub it in public.... until your husband laughingly tells you to stop playing with yourself.
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YKYACPW you are envious of your friends 6 month old baby because it has more hair than you.
YKYACPW you are busy chatting to a friend and forget to close the changeroom door while trying on clothes in a store - hell, what's another few people seeing you in your underwear.
YKYACPW you get 'knowing' looks from other people wearing scarfs.
YKYACPW you carry more medication in your handbag than makeup.
YKYACPW you no longer notice the little things that used to drive you nuts.
YKYACPW you can openly discuss diarrhea with a pharmasist without lowering your voice to an embarrassed whisper.
YKYACPW you get excited that you get a headache in the left side of your head - because it's a nice change from the constant pain the the right side.
YKYACPW you used to surf the net for things like new clothes, holidays, latest fashions etc and now you spend most of the time in this forum !!!
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Kelpie - WOW GREAT GREAT GREAT!! How true! Good job!
(ps, I really laughed about your dressing room door and not closing it. The other day saw my RO he said do you want an assistant to come in while I give you a breast exam. I said, "Heck no, only 450 people have seen my one boob and my missing boob. Go ahead."
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YKYACPW....you insist on showing people your scar...
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You know she has had BC when your MO who you already suspect may have personal experience asks at the end of a followup conference in her office "Do you mind just lifting your shirt so I can do a quick check of your breast?"
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YKYACPW you go to the beauty salon to have your 1 inch chemo hair colored for the first time. One of the stylists you never met before tells you she had BC and just had reconstructive surgery and says, "want to see?" Before you know it, you are showing her your mastectomy scars and she is showing you her new boobs in the back of the salon!
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Denise, way funny. Sounds like a scene from Jaws when they were comparing scars :-).0
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YKYACP when you find 5 inch hairs in your sink and you're excited that you are actually shedding again like a normal person!
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Rockym, I know exactly what you mean.
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Rockym, I know exactly what you mean.
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YKYACP when you've been breast-free so long, your husband's nipples look weird.
Oh yeah, most people have those.....
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YKYACP - when you're walking down that street looking in the store windows but you don't see what's on display because you are checking to see that your boobs haven't slipped and are still even.
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YKYACP when you are left handed and your penciled on left eyebrow looks great and your right one looks like you put the eyebrow pencil between your toes to draw it on!!!!! My right eyebrow looks jacked up compared to my left one. No amount of redrawing works to make it look better. Or if you are used to smoothing down your eyebrows and accidentally wipe half your penciled eyebrows off.
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YKYACP when your PCP has your file up on her computer without using your magnetic card - and the files are according to identity card number, not name.
This happened yesterday....
Leah
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YKYACP when you get really good at shaking out exactly 7 pills when refilling the upcoming week's pill organizer.
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Just did my pill organizer
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Ossa, me too!
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