You know youre a cancer patient when....
Comments
-
YKYACPW you begin to understand how all those "parlour games" and game shows were invented. The conversations with DH are like:
it's 1 word, starts with a C
it gets the...water off of....you know... the yellow stuff....with red sauce.....spaghetti!!!
it can be used to.....rinse....dirt off of strawberries
Him: Colander?
Yes!!! Why didn't you get it when I first started asking??????
0 -
Lol Barb.........You sound exactly like me! Just as well that my DH always finished my sentences for me so now there is not much change......well maybe a little......he now fills the gaps in the sentences too....lol
0 -
OK...yes, I DO feel bad for you girls in your 20s and 30s who ended up with chemopause turning into full fledged menopause, but as one who is rapidly pushing 50 and has been feeling 90 for a whole year now, I even envy YOU.
OK, back to our regularly scheduled post...
YKYACPW the weight loss diet you're on and nearly done with works so well that you KNOW without a doubt that THIS spring your body will look better than it has in YEARS...except for one thing! ONE THING! You remember that thanks to the mangled, cancer-eaten breast which is misshapen and a whole cup size smaller than your "good" one, you won’t be able to proudly show off your “new” body by wearing fitted tops because even though the bra sock evens things out sufficiently in darker colored loose fitting T-shirts and blouses, you'll look just as ridiculous wearing bright fitted T-shirts and tank tops as you would have if you'd stayed fat.
:-(
0 -
Lena,
As a gift, I give you two words: Lady Grace. Seriously. They have thingies that even you out, and most insurance will pay for the aforementioned thingies.
http://ladygrace.com/default.asp
*susan*
0 -
Thank you Susan. By "thingies," you mean breast forms, right? I've seen them, actually looked at them seriously when I mistakenly thought I was going to have a mastectomy on my cancer-mangled right breast, but thinking of them now, well, since I'm not actually MISSING a breast, a form would be OVERCOMPENSATING. When I use the bra sock, I fiddle with it until it matches size wise. Even though it won't work for closer fitting clothes (especially white or light colored), it does for about 60-70% of my wardrobe.
YKYACPW...you realize that it's been a long time since you stopped thinking of women who have buzz cuts or otherwise very short hair -- when you even noticed them in the first place -- as simply having different aesthetic/style preferences than you do, but now you notice them a lot and instantly feel sorry for them on sight -- even when you know it's possible that they did NOT (or are not about to) do chemo and they really LIKE their hair short!
0 -
Lena, as one who is pushing 50 from the other side, what diet worked for you????
And remember, those women don't want looks of pity, perhaps looks of empathy is what you meant...
0 -
Barbe, I used THIS -- it's called The Hacker's Diet -- as the base:
http://www.fourmilab.ch/hackdiet/www/hackdiet.html
upon which to design my own personalized diet plan that includes the foods *I* like to eat and can periodically adjust to fit MY body and MY metabolism, not anyone else's. This way not only do I lose weight, but I don't have to give up ANYTHING I don't want to foodwise (I only have to eat LESS of it or have it less OFTEN so it falls out into the averages! LOL). Other reasons why I love this diet: I also don't have to spend any more money on food than I would anyway, or eat bizarre special diet plan foods that cost a lot of money I don't have and wouldn't eat after losing the weight anyway, which leads to maintenance issues to KEEP the weight off. And, since it teaches me how much I can eat and of what in order to supply my body with enough, but not excess fuel, and since I never have to "give up" what I like, I don't expect to end up with maintenance problems.
The specific foods and calorie counts I eat may not be right for YOU, but that's okay, because you can do exactly what I did, if you decide to pursue this. Before starting the diet, spend some time finding out how many calories are in everything you normally eat, then you can make a "food chart" out of it with which you can plan your own meals of however many calories you need for losing weight, and later when you get where you want to be, maintaining your weight. The guy who invented this diet and wrote it had been a 70 pounds overweight software programmer geek (hence calling it "The Hacker's Diet").
I only had to lose 30 pounds though... I weighed 155 when I started the end of May/first week of June 2010, and now I weigh 127 (goal is 125). I'm sure it would've gone faster without the aromatase inhibitors... :-P
YKYACPW...you make sure to have as much sex as you can not JUST because YOU (and your man) love it, but also because you also don't want your vagina to atrophy!
0 -
Lena, they have partial breast forms specifically for women who have had lumpectomies to help even things out. Like this http://www.breastformshopping.com/breastforms-lumpforms.aspx Maybe something like that might help?0
-
Lena,
The breast thingies are not forms. They are custom made "bits" that fill our your bra so that your two breasts are identical. They have the benefit of not having racing stripes and toe seams, however you would loose the ability to use the great term bra sock. :-)
*susan*
0 -
Lena - my boobs are really different sizes since the lumpectomy. They look terrible "loose" one quite firm, one saggy with the nipple much lower. However, as my big boob is so squishy compared to my radiated boob, I find that with a bra on it's not too bad.
0 -
Lena, I'm reading his site. It's right up my alley!!! Here's hoping.......I even told my DH that 'we' are on a diet....hehehehehehe I am a very logical person (manger) so this really speaks to me. Wish me luck!
0 -
I am SOOO happy you like it, Barbe! The only "regret" I have was not putting together and going on this diet when I was "only" ten pounds overweight! As to logical - yup yup me too! I used to be a mad scientist. MYUUUUHAHAHAHA! >:-) And what could be more logical than planning/going on a diet based on YOUR meal preferences and your own body's burn rate?
About putting your husband on the diet with you, Barbe, LOL!! To be honest, my beloved Pack Rat could stand to lose 30 pounds around his middle just like I had to, but we don't live together so I don't have any control over what HE eats when he's not at my house, plus, he does not share my love of fruit and vegetables or my ability/willingness to plan specific meals (or anything else: he's allergic to "plans") -- so I got "skinny" and he didn't -- even though HE was the one who originally gave me the link to the Hacker's Diet! (um hm, he's a mechanical designer. Lots of engineering and physics LOL)
Susan and Holly (thanks for your additional suggestion, Holly) -- I found what, from what I could see, I believe would work best for me that I can afford, at the breastformshopping.com site -- the foam pushup pad. I just ordered it now. If putting one of THESE in my right bra cup works, I won't mind putting the bra socks away. LOL
0 -
Lena,
As part of the Federal Law, your insurance should cover two a year. Do check before putting those socks away.
*susan*
0 -
YKYAACPW... when you discover a use for all those shoulder pads you saved. They work great as filler in a bra cup to fill it up to match the other side
0 -
Susan, the pads I just ordered cost $14.95 ($19.95 when including the shipping). Honestly, if there is anything I can do to avoid messing around with Medicare hassles, I'll do it. I can't even stand just entering that maze! All the other forms and pads and thingies and whatevers I looked at on both sites were beyond my means and I would have had to mess with Medicare to get any reimbursement, and with my luck I'd find out, after all the hassle, that even if I qualified for a reimbursement it probably wouldn't be enough. So I'm just going to do the best I can within MY means whenever I can.
Gads PJ, I should have saved shoulder pads and never did. If I had, I might never have "invented" the Bra Sock nor would I have had to buy something a little less obvious than a bra sock!
mmm. oh well.
YKYACPW...you blame every single joint ache and pain, without exception, on your aromatase inhibitors, even though "normal" people can get things like bursitis and tendonitis too!
0 -
In two places that painting says it all.
0 -
Lena, glad you were able to find a product that hopefully will work for you! Although I have to admit I love the "bra sock". Lol, maybe if you retire it you can pay homage to it by making something creative out of it. Anything that helps to make you laugh and lift your spirts is always a good thing!
0 -
Hey, Holly...Maybe I'll save the Bra Socks (I have three of them, one for each bra LOL) should I no longer need to use them on my chest, but, I won't be making anything with them. I'm totally NOT creative in a crafts-way, and on top of that I lack any fine motor coordination in my left hand to be able to even try it if I wanted to...I don't LIKE to be frustrated, personally, and I am ANYWAY all too much as it is. I was always a total doofus to do more than look at, admire, enjoy and once in awhile envy those who could do what I couldn't, which was anything at all in any and ALL forms of visual arts -- fine arts, craftsmanship, EVERYTHING. My artistic talent was exclusively limited to music and writing, and when I had a stroke in 1993 which left residual permanent paralysis in my left hand, the music went out the window because I couldn't play my instruments anymore (piano, synthesizers, and acoustic 12-string guitar; 28 years, 10 years and 18 years respectively) anymore. After that I fell into creative amateur writing (I did it solely for my own pleasure; I didn't and still don't have even a remote interest in trying to get published) for several years.
Such is life. Life is a sexually transmitted disease.
YKYACPW....you realize that there IS a cure for Stage IV: suicide. At least that way you won't die of cancer.
(Alas, I'm still way too chicken sissy shit and nowhere near brave enough to do that yet, but I'm sure I'll BECOME courageous enough when I actually have to -- that is, when the approach of diapers and drool becomes imminent.)
0 -
Wow, so sorry to hear about your stroke. It's terrible that you've had to go through so much with your health! Many women survive for YEARS even at stage IV. Here's hoping that you are one of them!
You could always use some markers and arrange them into a shadow box! No sewing necessary and pretty easy on the hands. Just have to come up with a cool design to draw on them. Lol, and markers on sock would make for more of dying process as opposed to the need for any fine lines or being skilled in drawing. Just an easy idea. It should be kitchy and meaningful to you. Lol, I'd probably do something silly and make them into boobes smashed against the glass of the shadow box with the third proudly labeled bra socks draped above or below them.
YKYACPW you are discussing the fine art of memorializing bra socks!
0 -
Holly:
1. I don't know what a "shadow box" IS....and honestly, please don't tell me, because,
2. I have NEVER had even the REMOTEST TALENT OR ABILITY WHATSOEVER even for "just" DRAWING, EVER. I don't do and never could or did any visual arts of any kind, I am SPATIALLY RETARDED. I can't draw a straight line on a piece of GRAPH PAPER with a freakin' RULER! You know how hard it was for me to pass organic chemistry when I couldn't draw the molecules? I could verbally explain all of it, but I couldn't draw the molecules on the exams, so I failed half the exams and quizzes. If not for my good lab reports, I would have failed the course -- was lucky to get out with a C! Thanks to this, the whole subject or idea of me even trying to draw anymore makes me want to scream and throw things. Cool designs, me? MY ASS!!!!!
If I keep the bra socks, I can just keep them as they are. Yeah I say "if," because I HATE having cancer and don't actually consider it anything I'd want to memorialize (I don't "celebrate 'cancerversaries'" either). Truth be told, I'll most likely just have one more pair of unmatched socks to wear on my feet.
(Please forgive me if my venting was too strong, but it's a really sore subject.)
YKYACPW...you plan your errands around medical visits.
0 -
YKYACPW you actually look forward to having lunch at the hospital during chemo, cause the chef is a chef from a very nice casino.....yeah, the hospital actually serves good food here! had shrimp bisque on tuesday, and it was good!!!
0 -
It's ok Lena, sorry for touching on a sore subject. I have to say though that your phrasing made me laugh. I think we can all relate to things that we are not so good at! My husband is a musician and I have an ear for music like a cauliflower! He tries to have discussions with me about different things and I get so lost and just end up tuning him out and it really pi$$es him off when I do. Lol, I explain to him over and over that it all sounds like greek to me, but he still tries.
I honestly just thought it would be a fun and clever idea that might bring some humor to the situation. Lord knows we all need to laugh. I am definitely the type of person that tries to make light of serious situations. It's my coping mechanism. Gah, if couldn't find ways to laugh about my breast cancer I think I'd put a gun to my head, but that's just me. I don't think I'll be celebating any canceversaries myself either. I got my diagnosis two days before my daughter's birthday, not the association I wanted to have!
0 -
It's OK Holly, I forgive you. There's no way you could have known without my telling you: I don't expect telepathy out of anybody here.
Oh, and you know, even though I lost my ability to play musical instruments with that stroke, alas, I didn't lose my "multitrack EARS," my Pack Rat is not a musician, so if we listen to music, we end up in an opposite situation as you and your musician husband -- I'm the one who knows, he's the one who knows jack sh*t. LOL But he gets me back -- remember I said I'm "spatially retarded"? Well HE's a mechanical DESIGNER! Good thing he doesn't mind explaining to me first before he tells me something like that!
YKYACPW....the main reason WHY you're glad you didn't have children is so you could do what you had "always wanted" to do with your OWN life by the time you turned 40 so you don't have to die with a long bucket list and full of deathbed regrets for how you didn't live your own life while you were still young and healthy enough.
0 -
YKYACPW when you know you have put something somewhere "safe", but for the life of you you can't remember where. For days.
0 -
Day - did you put it somewhere that you "knew" you would remember too... that's me!!! LOL
0 -
Of course! It was a "safe" place so I can find it later with no worries!
0 -
YKYABCP when ur hair starts to grow bk,too long for the wig to stay in place....too short to style lol x
0 -
YKYABCP~~ When you have the chemo pukies and have the chemo diarrhea too and hope you don't lose it at both ends at the same time!!.... or hope it happens when you make it to the bathroom!! haha!!
0 -
YKYACPW you calmly tell the radiologist which part of your hip to x-ray to co-ordinate with the CT results...and you realize how impersonal you sound - about your own body!! She was concerned, but I told her that the worst had already happened, so no news is going to be that bad again.
0 -
I always feel like I'm talking about someone else when I tell a doc about how I'm feeling!!!
0
