Great saying about depression
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Hello all,
Man we got a lot going on here! I hate the way we are kept in a state of anxiety with these tests and not knowing results for days or weeks and then waiting to see docs, who we then have to decide to trust or start the process over.
(((((((everyone))))))
3jays, I read that too, and said to myself, WTF!!!! It's only been a few days, give me a break! This is a hard one, and we don't just "get over" stuff. I'm with you and love you, you know that!!!!!!
LOL tell the doc to take a trip to Timbuktu! My new PCP office lady called me today and she had made an appt with a pulmonary specialist at Brigham and Women's for me for next Wednesday. Yay! I don't know how she got me in so quick. Might have been the comment about not knowing how much longer I could go on this way.
justagirl, he has not run any tests. He is basing his assumptions on xrays and scans that were done in March while I was going through rads. I just can not figure him out and I have given up trying. He did run some allergy tests and they all came back negative. They have ruled out asthma, I think. Just not enough information for me and too much medication.
I met Bill once. I got caught in the crowd at the MV agricultural fair while Bill was here with Chelsea. I had my two little kids with me and we got scared we were going to get squished, so I was trying to get away. He reached out and took my hand and looked into my eyes and even though I didn't want to respond, he was just so mesmerizing. So I understand the BF comments.
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thanx guys, i guess it just was really hard for me to hear a persons OPINION, and thats' all it was...
3 ple from the boards called e today, right after, one of them being Barb A who was there.. she couldn't believe it, either.. like you get over something like this in 4 days.. yes, thats all its been.....i worry, her hubs is coming on, and a friend of 30 yrs is already here, reading everything.. not such a great impression to leave, huh? anyway, i've decided to block yet ANOTHER insensitive person on BCO.. and no, it had NOTHING to do with anyone here.. you guys, i could at least reason with..you're my sisters, after all...
I do hope you get some answers, Kate.. is it the ins that makes the tumor board thing? we don't have it here, or my insurance is good, cause i didn't take long.. but, then, my cancer was the real aggressive type..
Di, im sorry that the cysts are so large, i kmow they can be painful..
they MAY be taking mine out, later, but one of the reasons i had a hard time conceiving yrs ago was polycystic ovaries.. as soon as they got taken out, they came back.. that's totally different than your case, BTW, so don't worry.. if they do surgery on mine, its only bc they could be the big c.. but they think not.. im too old, they don't even WORK anymore ahaha.. they can "snip" them, if they wanna know for sure, so if they're not, that means theyre pretty confident your ok.. but, maybe the T has to go.. let us know what they decide...
thanx for the love and support, ladies.. im just gonna keep "plowing onward..3jays
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Kate: first, goody all clear on your 'scopes'. 2nd, I agree with Diane it would be good for a panel of professionals to review your situation and I know you want a definitive answer yesterday but medical doctors don't work that way. I had to wait 3 months panicked out of my mind before the BS would agree to do my DM, and it was only because my GP called her and said if you don't do it, and Debbie likes you and trusts you, then she will go elsewhere. Maybe DH is becoming withdrawn as he just doesn't know what to say to you and he is as frightened as you are and even more so because if you truly love someone, seeing that person upset makes you upset. As to your DS, he too may be scared and worried....and he is a teenager and I do think during that age span their hormones kick in and our loving children can become 'right little rotters' but he will come back to being your sweet son - you will have glimpses of this so don't take it so to heart like I did and always wonder what I was doing wrong.
Diane, If your measurements, the endometrium of 9.2mm equals about 3/16 inch. The fibroid and cysts at 2.0 x 1.8 x 1.5 equal less than 2/16 of an inch. And, it's ok to ask the Dr to tell you what these results mean in inches and not use the metric system which most in the US are not familiar with. Don't panic yet about a hysterectomy and ooph - they might be able to just remove the fibroids and cyst. Endometreosis in itself can be very very painful when you get your periods and all I know is the dr's would prescribe pain pills. Sadly, when anything goes wacky in our bodies we immediately think cancer, or at least I do. You are right to not worry until you have definitive information in front of you to be concerned about.
3jays: some people should just be slapped across the face for their insensitive remarks but then maybe they were dropped on their heads when they were babies and have a severe impairment of sensitivity to others. You are a bright shining light to me the way you keep positive all the time
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Oh MY!!! I miss one day and everything happens.....
3jays- I don't really understand other than someone said something extremely hurtful and cruel to you - I cannot imagine anyone doing that to you and especially now with your grief and all your health complications- that is more than monstrous and I'm so so very sorry. I just can't imagine how anyone could be so hateful and insensitive. We will take care of you, though and just love, support and comfort way in any way possible....
Kate!!!! Oh.... I'm just going to have to PM.... I need to think about what all to say..
Diane- Wow, you are the third person who is having to deal with this. My dog walker just had some fibroids removed which were apparently larger than a grapefruits and there were about 4 of them some of which were on the outside. Now this lady is around 5'2" and if she weighs 90 lbs I'd be surprised- can't imagine where they were hidden. Anyway, she is like a new person now that they are removed and she didn't have any trouble at all from the surgery- so hope that helps a little bit
Well hang in there everyone!!
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3jays. take your time and know you are safe here. We all mourn in our own time. Some people get up and do, some people sit and cry, some people just go numb. You have a right to your sadness, you have a right to process it all on your own time schedule. On another thread, i got into a discussion about crying and I was chastised for crying and not being "strong"---well at first, and then many more women piled on and said crying is how they deal with it all, its who they are. And if it helps you deal, then good for you. We're all different. i get that. But someone else's way may work for them, doesn't mean it works for me. Or you.
Kate-we will sit and wait with you. I have written half a dozen sentences and end up erasing them all. Have faith. We will be here with you. And can I join the drinking party with you and Diane? We can push the chairs back and DANCE!!!!!
9.2 mm does sound so ominous! 3/16 th of an inch, not so much!! My Mo has gone to measuring weight in kgs, I have been hovering around 74 sounds so much better than 175!!!
So my GF calls me last night to tell me the latest of her sister. She got her port yesterday and somehow the doc tells her DH, but not her, that they believe it has spread to her liver, according to her first set of scans. She gets the rest of scans today and Monday. She's 45 and didn't show any symptoms until the end of July. Turns out the mass is totally blocking her intestine, they are planning chemo first to shrink the tumor before removing it. We had another good friend who lost his brother to CC three years ago. Also early 40's, had done a dramatic weight loss and thought the stomach issues were related to the weight loss. Stage IV at the onset. My GF is devastated and I tried my hardest to tell her the advances of chemo, how long people can live with mets,etc. I tried my hardest to give her hope. But I know this CC is a real beast and progresses differently than BC. Cancer sucks.
Now a good story. My DH's aunt just turned 70 and had lap band surgery over 5 years ago. she lost weight at first, but it all came back with a vengeance. She is only 5 foot and is a bottom heavy person(although she had some HUGE ta-tas!). So as a present to herself, and in the mood to spend her kids' inheritance, she has been doing a whole body lipo and tuck procedures. Five in all, one section of the body at a time. Her most recent surgery was her breast reduction, they took off 10 inches off each breast! Her PS calls her a week later, and tells her that as usual they send the breast tissue off to pathology and it came back with an itty bit of LCIS. She called me all freaked out cause the ps was talking BMX, etc. I tried telling her to s-l-o-w down and wait till she saw an onc. Fast forward, her onc says she is all clear, and no more tx except Tamoxifen. They said it is very common to find cancer in breast reduction tissue. If she hadn't have started the reduction surgeries, she never would have found the lcis, and who knows if it would have turned into cancer. She is convinced she will die of something else!
So long winded, for me at least. My DH and I are off this week to see the dermatologist for our 5 year "body scan". I am not worried for me, but my DH is a fair blonde that has lived in Florida his whole life and didn't believe in sunscreen until 5 years ago. nothing like having some precancerous chunks removed from your body to spark your concern. I can't wait to show the doc all my scars, and radiated skin. Nothing like a little humiliation to start the weekend. BTW dh and I are spending the weekend at the beach this weekend. Maybe I might get lucky. Its only been 5 or 6 months. I forget. ooh don't get me started on this subject. . .
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Hi Katie,
I am doing okay thanks. I did not get any reply to the problems I have had with my TE from this website - must be an unusual problem- but now realise the chemo caused the problems. It happened again with the second one, but this time immediately. I have not been able to move my arm much for 10 days - the skin over the TE is too small, it buckles and corrugates. The shiny aspect of it was not as bad this time though. My sister told me the lady she works with had the same thing happen to her, so I feel so much better about it. Just hope the chemo doesn't kill the skin off, as it goes a funny purple colour as well. I only have 2 of the Taxotere left, and I am sure this is the chemo culprit, so hold thumbs the skin survives the onslaught!!
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Oh Claire - such an onslaught of news... I'm so sorry about your GF. Yes Colon Cancer is a different beast all together, however.... my BIL went though... well hell actually. First he was told he had three weeks to live with a very rare prostate cancer, then was told no it wasn't that bad but would need his prostate removed. They did that.. It was perfectly healthy. Then they realized they went through the rectal wall to get the biopsy and that is what he had... so they did chemo and such and he responded great . 6 years later he has colon cancer- the cells where the rectal cancer were are all mixed with colon cells so they never really got an answer to which.. well ended up with a full colostomy... which wouldn't have been so bad but the nicked his urethea and it leaked for Months into his abdomen and he developed a hernia somewhere down there as well. .... so another surgery and that was last year about this time, the hernia surgery was last winter but now so far clear and all good and they have been traveling and doing great - he is 72! So hope that might give a little hope...The chemo he had totally worked on the cancer and his was NOT contained to the colon but hadburst through the walls but not to the liver...
I was also diagnosed with LCIS and usually if there is not another cancer they do a wait and see and some people Never develope cancer- mine I got both at the same diagnosis so it is a different type of cancer it may or may not ever develop but it is slow and they can monitor it before it spreads so with doctor's care she should be all right... Leaf on the boards knows the most about LCIS so you can PM her and ask... she has done tons or research...
Maddie- hope your skin holds up all right!
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So much going on. So many reasons to give up. But do you notice we never do. We are determined and hopeful even when we are sad and scared. We take it one day at a time and sometimes one minute at a time....... but we keep on. We even in the depths of our own fears, anxieties, pain and problems reach out to those we know are hurting. Why.......... because when you are diagnosed with this disease you realize how precious true friends and family are. You realize that we are given an insight and ability to empathize (sp) like never before. We know this journey is made more attainable when accompanied by those who have walked in our shoes.
We truly should celebrate this in each other. I know you have all made my journey easier. Knowing I can say and feel anything without being judged.
I called the PS. Due to the fact there is an odor now they said to put on an triple antibiotic ointment rather than just the A&D ointment. I may lose part of the graft but hopefully not the entire thing. He will see me next Thursday as planned.
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Maddie, when I had chemo the breast skin went purple too so I was sure to not wear a bra or anything fitting and wore soft cotton camisoles. Also, 3 times a day I rubbed Body Shop Mango cream lotion on both my breasts and whla - by the time I had my DM the skin looked good. After the DM the top layer of skin went all splotchy in colour - grey, white, bright red and purple, and it wasn't the bruising - that time had passed. I resumed with my gentle massaging as soon as the sutures healed and a year later my PS says it looks normal - light pink and evenly coloured.
hopefulheal- I hope you are taking an oral antibiotic also. Even a triple antibiotic ointment will not penetrate to the tissues that need it and you need oral antibiotics to be in your whole body fighting to save this nipple. An odor from a wound is almost always a sign of bacterial infection and it the drainage doesn't even have to be yellow or green in colour.
Claire; that's the whole nut of this game - we wait to see what might and might not happen and keep hoping and praying (and I'm not religious) to never see the word cancer and our name in the same sentence again. When I had my first basal cell carcinoma removed from my upper chest wall just 3 weeks before my DM my GP had to talk me down off the wall - I thought this was the end - cancer's were starting to pop up everywhere. Then 6 months later I found another BBC, still upset. Last month it was a Squamous Cell Carcinoma, worse but not the bad one. Now when I go out to garden I have slathered on 30 sunblock, have a container of it nearby to refresh if I'm out more than two hours, wear a water resistant kind in case I sweat it off, wear a wide brimmed hat - next I will be covering myself in that white zinc - a pretty picture, two brown eyes, a mouth, a big green hat and a white body.
Kate: thinking of you............
No one has a right to judge us. If we cry we cry. If we rave, so be it. We have won the right to be bitches when we want to or can't help it (my excuse due to Femara) or moody or just plain unhappy. BUT, we do owe it to ourselves to at least to try and start every day with one positive thought and not let this nasty BC rob us of our joy with our children and husbands, our happiness and right to enjoy our lives.............
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Hey everyone- I decided while I'm waiting for Tucson to figure things out I'd start the ball rolling for an appointment at the new cancer center near me. Just got off the phone and they were really nice. Took all my information (dx, surgery dates, physician's names, phone numbers, etc) and said they would request all my records. Once they had them they'd call me for an appointment. I got a onco's name from the thread I started, another thread I was posting on and some PM's. One woman's name came up 3 times so that's the one I'm going with as she seems well liked and respected. (Researched her online, too, of course.) So now I wait to see who contacts me first- Arizona Cancer Center or Banner MD Anderson Cancer Center. Feeling much better now that I know I've done all I can do for now.
It's been a (rare) rainy day here in AZ and the temp has dropped about 20*. Just love days like this!
Sorry for the challenges everyone is facing right now. I know how overwhelming it can be physically and emotionally. There's such a feeling of helplessness and lack of control over our own bodies. Hoping we can all turn a corner soon. (((hugs))) to all!
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Hopeful well said...as always.
Kate glad you got the ball rolling! I hope these weeks fly by for you!
Claire I am so sorry about your friend's sister. Its funny we never really see the worry or sadness in those supporting us through treatment. I know in my circle of friends they tried to not let me know how worried or sad or scared they were. Your friend is lucky to have you to lean on..so she can be strong for her sister. Now on to your husbands aunt...I cant believe a doctor would do all those cosmetic surgeries on a 70 year old woman. Isnt that too much at once? I mean obviously a good thing they discovered the LCIS but geesh...that sounds painful. I had the tiniest spot lipoed during recon and it was so painful. I dont know much about LCIS but I have read what Stanzie said.
Ok to all you lovelies who did the conversion from cm to inches...thanks but I was more asking if a 2cm cyst was large in comparison to my 3 cm ovary???? Are three 2 cm intramural fibroids large for my petite uterus??? and is 9.2mm endometrium thick enough to warrant a d&C?? any insight greatly appreciated.
I was talking to my friend who is a nurse and she thought it all was large and that no wonder I was in so much pain and didnt understand why they were waiting 3 months. All things I will discuss with my gyn when I see him Thursday which cant come quick enough.
OK I am watching Stand Up to Cancer and have been crying since it started. I continue to be amazed at the children who endure cancer treatments...surgery...chemo..and miss the care free life a child is supposed to have.
Claire...almost forgot...hope you have an amazing weekend at the beach..that you not only get a little but get a lot!! and that your moles are just beauty marks!!!
Hugs to all
Diane
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I forgot to add..Hopeful definitely get antibiotics. I took them just for a bug bite that looked like it was getting infected. I hope that graft holds on for you!!!!! and that infection heals quickly.
Diane
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Sorry I've deserted you all for a couple of days. I am still reeling from the passing of Marybe. Do I understand correctly that someone thought 3jays should be "moving on" from Marybe's passing???? I would spin off the face of the earth if someone told me how to react to the death of someone I loved!!!!! 3jays post is deleted, so I am just guessing from the responses.
On a lighter note; I'm beginning to think that a tilted uterus is the NORM and my un-tilted one is the freak in this crowd! A couple of times I read "titled" and thought how pretentious to name your uterus! hehehehhehe
Diane, I had HUGE endometriosis by the time they finally took out my uterus!! It can become quite severe, but they DO have to wait a couple of cycles of your period to see how the cysts react. Thus the 3 months. But do NOT let them delay after that! They could shut down your ovaries without taking them out (in case you may want kids some day). Is that your concern? If you got a D&C it would open up your cervix a bit and allow a less painful flow of period blood. That could be a good option. My uterus with fibroids ended up being the size of the surgeons fist and I looked 4 months pregnant.
Stanzie, your daugher is responding because you have stopped "trying". Just like I said!! It's uncanny, isn't it? See now, she's wondering why you're not all over her and asking about school in depth and such. When you start doing that again, she'll pull right back!
Kate, we are all here holding your hand...or at least holding up the next drink!!
Claire, I hear you about the sex! My DH lost interest right around the time I lost my breasts. Such a horrid co-incidence...sigh. He has tested low on testosterone, though. So get some!!!
I'm so sorry I forget who mentioned about getting aureoles and nipples put on that said they'd have to get the whole surgery done again, but I don't understand? Why would you have to start again?
I know I'm forgetting others, but I my brain is just not picking up normal signals yet......
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Diane, the answer is yes - a 2cm cyst in a 3cm ovary doesn't leave much room in the ovary for what's supposed to be there, therefore the pressure and pain you feel. I don't know the definitive cut-off for when they do a d&c for endometrosis. If the fibroids in your uterus are 2cm, that equals 3/4 of an inch and the uterus is of course larger than an ovary and designed to expand. I know you didn't ask for my advice, but I would vere toward having the ovary cyst and he fibroids in your uterus removed before they get larger. The larger they get, the longer the surgery, the longer the u/s checks will have to become another scheduled medical appointment in your life.
for all of you, this is the metric system: 10mm = 1cm 1/2 inch = about 1.3cm or 13mm 1 inch = 2.5 cm
Diane, Claire and hopeful - my heart is with the three of you. Your worries are my worries.
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Diane, did the doctor say if the cysts are on the OUTSIDE or the inside of the ovary/uterus?
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Baaaaaarrrrrrbbbbee!! Actually my concern is that my onc will want to take me off Tamoxifen and/or do a ooph and a hyst nether of which is an option. I will stop the tamoxifen before i have my ovaries removed. It has made me feel miserable from day 1 and I can not live with this discomfort. I just cant get over how painful this has been. I can't eat ...sleep..have back pain..constipated..fatigued. I understand why I have to wait I just wish I didnt have to. Thankfully tonight I can down a demerol and sleep in..although I do have to work tomorrow and Sunday. so Thats whats frustrating too. I cant really take anything but advil to aleviate the pain because i am so busy with work. Oh well it will be over before I know it. Sorry you too are still grieving the loss of such an amazing woman.
OK I think the gallon jug of miralax has just kicked in. OY
Diane
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the cyst is inside the ovary and the fibroids are intramural fibroids which are inside the muscle of the uterus (I had to google it) I think the cyst is giving me more pain than the fibroids. although when the tech pressed on my uterus I could have punched her in the face. I thought I was going to pass out..reading the report I see I have two fibroids on the right side one on the left side and ovarian cyst on the left side AND my ovary is not exactly where it should be.
I hate waiting ...waiting ...waiting.
Debbie thanks for your input. I very much appreciate it. My good friend is a nurse at Hopkins (where I go) and she suggested i get another opinion (radiologist) She didnt seem to think if I am in pain now why it made any sense to wait since no matter what (in her opinion) I would have them removed. So if I can just be paitent (you know dear virgo not our strong suit) I will have all the answers I need Thursday....i hope. BTW I have to say.. I love nurses. My niece has decided she wants to be a nurse and it warms my heart. It defnitely takes a special person to be a nurse and I appreciate all of them.
ok time for a cute pet story. Charlie is soooooo funny when he has a bone. He likes to nibble ..hide the bone...nibble...hide the bone. He literally could spend an hour looking for just the right hiding spot..and if 10lb Sadie (cat) gets too close to his hiding place...he gets the bone and hides it elsewhere. He is literally cracking me up right now pacing around looking for the perfect place. So where does he hide it...inside one of Sadie's cubes that she sits on or goes inside of. Good job Charlie Bear! Sometimes I really wonder where I would be without my sweeties.
OK off to bed...good night all...G'day Debbie. Hope your weekend if a good one
Diane
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Diane, I'm confused. I thought above that you said you would NEVER get your ovaries taken out!? I do know that even with all my crap going on and the fact that I was 45 when they finally gave me a hysterectomy, I had to BEG them to do it!! They are very wary of taking out baby-making machines when we are so "young". I already had two kids even, into their mid-20's at that time!! So stamp your feet on Thursday and tell them it is "affecting your quality of life" and make them do something NOW! Wathing and waiting is NOT an option as you know what you want to have done. Hugs to you for your pain, though, sweetie!
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No I dont want them out but because my bc was 95% ER+ and 90% PR+ my BS thought I should shut down or remove my ovaries and now I feel like with all the fibroids and cyst that my gyn onc and BS may all think the same thing especially since my onc thinks the Tamoxifen is responsible for it all. Since I am still getting my period I am worried about what my options are if onc wants to stop Tamoxifen.
Ok ladies off to work. Have a good Saturday!! Its rainy here today but tomorrow is supposed to be gorgeous.
Enjoy the day!
Diane
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This PS does not believe in using antibiotics easily. I asked for some after the surgery and he did not want to. He did give me some during the surgery. I may see if I have any left over that are not expired. I am definitely going to talk to him on Thursday about it. IF he won't give them to me maybe I can find one of the other docs that will. He knows my history so maybe I can talk him into it even for a short course. If I still have the odor on Monday or Tuesday I will call the office and ask for one.
More later.
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Interesting how different PS are about antibiotics. Mine gave me antibiotics after each surgery and wants me to take them (just two doses0 before and after dental appointments, procidures like a colonoscopy, etc. My dentist feels it is unecessary but I figure I'll follow the PS's advice. I've got a bottle in the cupboard.
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Diane- I wish I could give you some advice but really don't know much about cysts though I do have some fibroids they keep an eye on. I googled ovarian cysts and there's some info out there about natural ways to prevent them but don't know if it's a bunch of hooey. Some recommend different supplements and such and some recommend different birth control pills which I don't even know if you're allowed to take those since it wasn't a factor for me (tubes tied). Sorry I can't be more help other than to say I hope they can come up with some relief for your pain with no more surgeries. (((hugs)))
Hopeful- If anyone is a candidate for antibiotics I would think it would be you! What is your PS's problem with it? I would think he would be extra cautious given everything you have been through in the past. The last thing you need is another serious infection jeopardizing your results. Why do we have to fight so hard for things as patients? I just don't understand it.
Claire- Hope your body scan went well- with your doctor AND your DH. (Tell your DH to do a very thorough job!)
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hopeful: ok, as a nurse and fellow bc friend, I am going to pull out my gun and shoot your PS! Always, always, will any invasive surgical procedure you start IV antibiotics in the theatre (operating room), and continue to give IV until patient goes home and then give them 7 days worth to take at home. In your case, with your history, I do feel your dr is being negligant to not of prescribed them. My PS always felt 'preventative' is better than having to treat an infection as it involves an area of our body that doesn't exactly have a lot of extra skin, and she (PS) told me if an infection incurred near my implant the implant would have to come out as the body would think of it as a foreign object and then we start all over. ASAP to the Dr. If you have any antibiotics for skin/tissue that are not more than a year out of date and have not been sitting in a warm place, if it were me I would seriously think about starting them - something with 'penicillin'. Unfortunately infections don't just go away on their own.
Claire: how was your scans?
Kate: you go girl - no waiting around with dust gathering under your feet for you.
Diane: if you don't have periods anymore, since you are ER/PG + the Dr will switch you to something like Femara, which is for women who are past that part of their life.
Charlie is so funny - Sadie probably watches where he hides it! Sadie is tiny at 10 pounds compared to my Fred at 16 pounds, maybe that's why his nickname is "Lard-ass'.
I awake in tears this morning and don't know why - guess my only choice if for the day to get better. Sun is out, a bit windy and the ground is dry - no rain for over 50 days. We bought water for the house yesterday. Think rain - I tell the horses to not drink so much out of the dam and the kangaroos sit in the middle of the creek running through the lower part of our property to get a proper drink.
Let's all just try to keep on going - I will if you will?
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Diane if they remove the ovaries you will produce estrogen from other sources we all do ( but it is a small amount not like we do with our ovaries) but you can go on an AI like Femara, Arimedex or Aromasin. So you will still have coverage like you did with the Tamoxifen. They believe the AI's give a little bit better outcome. I vote to get that stuff out of there!!
justagirl I am a RN as well. Mastectomy 12/29/09 first surgery. Second surgery 1/15/10 and weekend stay in hospital with IV antibiotics sent home with Cipro. At that surgery I lost the nipples and parts of the areolas. Third surgery 1/21/10 and 9 days in the hospital with IV antibiotics. They wanted to send me home on Cipro again and I said no! That didn't work the first time and at this point I had a PICC line. This was all due to a hospital aquired infection. On two IV antibiotics at home for 6.5 weeks basically 24/7. Then all the other surgeries related to trying to fix the mess they left on my chest! Except for the normal exchange from TE to implants. I told them I do not want to lose these tissue expanders! I knew if I did they would make me wait 6 months and then put them back in and I would be so far behind schedule. Well it is all relative isn't it! I am approaching three years in Dec. and I still am not done
This current PS is not the one I have gone through all of the above with. He would have had me on antibiotics. I am seeing him because my first one who I love does not do fat injections and I had some due to terrible rippling. So I will push for it, if I don't see an improvment. I am an RN as well and I am not seeing redness around this area at all. Believe me I looked in my drawers for old antibiotics!!!!!! None.
I sure hope you get rain!!!! We had a drought in the midwest as well and it is horrible. But have gotten some rain lately what a relief.
Claire I hope the scans go perfectly for both you and your DH
I slept all afternoon. I can't believe how tired I am still getting, it has been a couple of weeks since surgery! Although I do think the Aromasin is part of it.
I soooo wish we could all meet in person. I love my group of sister friends on this journey here on this thread. I feel so close to you and know we all care so much and want only the best for each other.
I am filled with a sense of gratitude that somehow I have been honored to meet all of you and feel it is such a privledge to be a part of your journeys.
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Ok ladies here's the skinny...I do get my periods I have been irregular on tamoxifen which is "normal for a woman my age"according to onc. I dont want to remove ovaries mainly becase the abrupt shut down of estrogen has a harsher effect on your body than going into menopause naturally. I dealt with that during chemo and it was horrendous and depressing. Yanking my ovaries has come up a lot between my bs and my previous onc because they didnt think I would be in menopause naturally by the time I conclude my 5 years on Tamoxifen. So I have literally been stressing about it since diagnosis. I just didnt want to lose a breast.....then my ovaries...then my uterus..then what?? I dont want to keep losing body parts to this f*&îng disease. You know?? Depressing.
I am not going to think about any of this until I talk to my docs on Thursday.
Hopeful I always got Keflex following every surgery and after my PS did my tattoo.
Monday is my sweet angel's 16th birthday!!! She has a hockey game at 3 then I will do my annual bring cupcakes and force the whole team to sing happy birthday to her on the field in order to get a cupcake.
I cant wait to see all the looks of shock when I leave the office at 2 on Monday 
Happy Sunday everyone!!
Diane
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HECK Diane, when you say 'yanking' your ovaries out, it forms a really bizarre picture in my warped brain. I used to think my brain was warped due to the chemo, and now I blame the Femara but I think part of it is the natural me.
I think that is what gets at me so bad about breast cancer. A piece of breast here and there - ok, now a breast or two and we'll put in these 'great' implants, and don't worry about losing your nipples, we can make new ones. Oh, and you don't need your ovaries - and by the way, anything else 'we' can remove? I say this all in jest with a breath of truth in it as I don't think doctors totally get it how we women are affected by the loss of body parts. My old GP actually said to me before I had my DM was that it really was amputation, as my breasts would be surgically excised and removed. And, the biggie is in losing a breast or two, we also lose any feeling in that breast and all of society has been defining women for years by their breasts and now ours are - what?
I know I am not 100% please with how my 'bumps' look, and the sagging skin under my arm due to the LD flap and the 12 inch scar on my back, even though the scars are faint and I know I was lucky that my PS was as good as she was but when I went in to see her a couple of weeks ago about some touch-ups, she said the risk of infection as the skin on my radiated breast was so fragile and there wasn't enough fat/skin under my arm to warrant doing surgery but her parting remark was 'keep your clothes on and quit critiquing yourself in front of the bathroom mirror.' Ok....... Well, I'm not about to turn around and go to another PS, but heck, what woman doesn't evaluate herself naked in front of the bathroom mirror?
So besides losing body parts, we lose part of the core of our very being. The drugs we take to take all the estrogen out of our body is further assult on our tender selves (guess I should only speak for myself).
So sorry to ramble on but Diane, I do understand how you are feeling and thinking. No one (GP or oncologist) has ever mentioned to me any negative effects I might have to my ovaries or uterus due to the Femara. Hmmm....maybe because I'd already been through menopause?
Go bake those delicious cupcakes Diane and send one to me special delivery!
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Hi Diane,
I am so sorry to hear all your problems with the cysts, fibroids etc. You are really going through the wringer aren't you!! I was so worried about you I nearly got up at 3am to reply, but thought my Hubbie would freak out. From personal experience I think you will find the ovary is the thing which is giving you the most pain. Fibroids cause heavy painful periods, but you can live with that. I have tried to troll back and look at your history, but this thread is long, so hope I am not missing anything when I give you my advice on this.
Why can't they drain this cyst laproscopically - ie - they go through your belly button. It is a day procedure - you have only a minute cut on your belly button, and you will experience some discomfort at the top of your shoulders for a day or 2 from the air they put in so they can operate with a bit more space. You would not have to delay your chemo for more than a few days. Please ask your Gynae if this is an option before they take the drastic step of an Ooph and Hysterectomy. Just see if it alleviates your pain, and if not then you can consider the other option. There are alway consequences to surgery -adhesions (scarring). Your may get other cysts, but they can drain them again. I can guarantee the surgeon would not be whipping out her ovaries if there was another option whether she needed them or not!! Di - I hope this advice has not confused you, and I don't know if there is a reason drainage is not an option, but just ask anyway! Thinking of you so much and wishing you well. I have had an Ooph and hysterectomy - they thought I has ovarian cancer- so if they do have to do this operation, and you need someone to talk to afterwards -I am here.
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Hi Diane,
I am worrying now that I have made you question your Dr's decision. We don't have your test results, so don't know the best course of treatment for your particular case- my suggestion is only to give you an idea to discuss with your Surgeon. Your fibroids may be so painful that removal of your uterus may be the only course of action.Your body has been through so much I hate to think of you having that operation as well. Thinking of you more than I can say.
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Maddie and Debbie thank you for your thoughtful responses. I will discuss all my options with my doc on Thursday thanks for the info, its good to be armed with information before my appointment.
I am having another doctor evaluate the US results so we'll see what he says as well.
Today it is absolutely perfect fall day. Weather is gorgeous! So glad I am getting ready to go to the office. I cant work too long as I got some cupcakes to bake!!
Have a great Sunday and thanks to all as always for your support.
Diane
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Debbie- I personally think PS's, and society in general, are a bunch of hypocrites. Society constantly puts pressure on women to feel a certain way particularly in the boob region. PS's are in business because women do stand in front of the mirror and criticize what they see. If we didn't they would be out of a job. So the message is.....BOOBS ARE IMPORTANT! BOOBS ARE IMPORTANT! We have it shoved down our throats since the time we are 12 in ads, tv, movies, music...the list goes on. Then, if we get BC, the message is suddenly...oh, boobs aren't that important. Just be glad you're alive. We'll do what we can for you but if you're scarred or misshapen....well, we've done the best we can. Throw a sweater on and be happy.
Forget standing in front of the mirror- how about standing in front of your DH or significant other or a new beau? Don't they understand how much loving your body affects loving someone else? That being able to feel desirable speaks to your feminity and sexuality. And how important that is?
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