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OMG They Found the Cure for Stupid

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Comments

  • sas-schatzi
    sas-schatzi Member Posts: 15,894

    Oh thank you Veggy, your so thoughtful. We should make this our chickens Mascot.

    Emily, you posted a couple of pages ago ----so, sorry forgot to say anything-------loved seeing you chiccky. Can't wait to see the new recipe. Hope your back for good Clucking nice

  • veggy
    veggy Member Posts: 4,150
  • veggy
    veggy Member Posts: 4,150
  • veggy
    veggy Member Posts: 4,150
  • veggy
    veggy Member Posts: 4,150
  • Bluebird-DE
    Bluebird-DE Member Posts: 1,233
  • Bluebird-DE
    Bluebird-DE Member Posts: 1,233

    how stupid am I anyway?

    DO TURKEYS EAT CATS? Read more here.....  wish Ihad a pic or video of that one....

  • veggy
    veggy Member Posts: 4,150

    How bout this be our new mascot?

  • veggy
    veggy Member Posts: 4,150
  • veggy
    veggy Member Posts: 4,150

    Here's another runner up for mascot!

  • veggy
    veggy Member Posts: 4,150

    ...and the fighting continues.

  • veggy
    veggy Member Posts: 4,150

    Oh no! Did the cat give up?

  • veggy
    veggy Member Posts: 4,150

  • veggy
    veggy Member Posts: 4,150
  • veggy
    veggy Member Posts: 4,150

    and Good-night all.

  • Alyson
    Alyson Member Posts: 3,737

    Veggy!!!!! How do you do it. So funny think I need a puff so please pass the asparagus.

  • kingjr66
    kingjr66 Member Posts: 406

    thanks veggy, just woke up and first laugh of the day.

  • sas-schatzi
    sas-schatzi Member Posts: 15,894
    To all- Just got a call from my insurance RN case manager. SX approved by them in less than one day after submittal. So, moving along. "Let it be". I've given it up to God. I was severely depressed about it. Then finally decided to give it to god and I will just follow along.

    Going to go and say some prayers of thanksgiving. L&H's&P's all this has been a long journey. For those that don't know , I found out about the brain tumor the same day as the breast bx Jan23  2009. Watchful waiting since. It showed by MRI in Sept 2011 that it was growing. It's taken from then till now to get here. It doesn't have Malignancy characteristics which are "no edema or Mass effect", but we all know until the final path report is in , we worry. -----SAS

  • EmilyInOntario
    EmilyInOntario Member Posts: 288

    Ah yes...the resting garlic...and the bacon....must keep them in the Recipe update...
     
    Life has been a roller coaster here but will get at that update soon...I'll work on the first draft tonight I think... 
  • sas-schatzi
    sas-schatzi Member Posts: 15,894

    Emily Lovey, it's been along time since you told the story of your avatar. If you wouldn't mind telling it again . It's almost like a parable.                 Good luck with the "recipe"

  • Bluebird-DE
    Bluebird-DE Member Posts: 1,233
  • EmilyInOntario
    EmilyInOntario Member Posts: 288

    Sas..my avatar is a picture of some wildflowers growing amongst the rocks along the Georgian Bay shoreline. My daughter took the picture when we were walking along the beach last summer. Their bright colour was a stark contrast to the rocks and pebbles and caught our attention. To see such a lovely little flower flourishing in such a rugged setting does seem somewhat symbolic doesn't it?
  • camillegal
    camillegal Member Posts: 15,711

    I love all the pictures--funny stuff.

    And Emily I'm glad u pointed that out, sometimes I'm not so observant.

    And SAS I wish u the best--the very best.

  • EmilyInOntario
    EmilyInOntario Member Posts: 288

                          The Ultimate Cure For Cancer ( March 2012)
    With an Introduction by Dr. Frank Lee Bull and Dr. R. U. Kydding

    "Throughout the historry many has tries and failled to discover the cure for the beast cancer.It is now with the greatest joy and pleasance that we, Dr. Frank Lee Bull and Dr. R.U. Kydding happily endorse this cynically proven and rigorously testes cure for the beast cancer."  Dr. Bull and Dr. Kydding are leading researchers for Centre for Diseases of the Gums and Prostates in Nigeria.

    Cancer Recipe

    This new cure has been streamlined for maximum effect and potency with minimal preparation. It is designed using a three pronged approach, body, mind and spirit.

    Preparation of Oral Treatment:

    Ingredients:

    1 tin lima beans
    1 tsp zest of grapefruit
    10 spears white asparagus
    13 strips of crisply fried cured bacon
    1 clove rested garlic
    1 eye of newt
    1 cup lightly sauteed mushrooms
    1/4 cup cows urine
    16 oz. bag of chocolate chips
    2 lemons ( include peel)
    2 cups extruded wheatgrass juice ( use the chew and spit method to extrude)
    1 ripe banana ( will also help cure impotence)
    pinch of salt to taste
    dash of pepper

    Combine in large blender and puree for 10 minutes. Then boil contents in an iron cauldron over an open fire for 20 minutes stirring constantly and with the accompanying spell. When mixture comes to rolling boil, wave magic wand over cauldron and chant the following " Hocus, Pocus,We Pray This Don't Chokus" Let mixture cool and prepare next step, the enema.

    The Enema
    You will need the following:
    1 enema bag ( pink)
    1 tin Star Butts Coffee ( fine grind, coarse grind if you are a masochist)
    1 box Nilla Wafers
    60 rolls of Bounty ( for clean up)
    Brew coffee in 1 quart of distilled water and dissolve wafers in the coffee . Pour sludge into enema bag. You are now ready to go to next step.
    VERY IMPORTANT: You must do the following with a POSITIVE ATTITUDE or this just won't work.
    1. Don tin foil hat and bacon bra ( can be custom ordered from Meece's Cure-ture and Lingerie Gallery)
    2. Stand near a south facing wall and administer the enema while humming the national anthem. NOW HOLD IT. Sip previously prepared asparagus wheatgrass puree until gone.
    3. Now stand on your head and drink 1 full glass of water from the River Ganges. Empty mind of all negative thought.
    4. You may now expell the enema, preferrably in an appropriate location while chanting " I am cured".
    Light a smudge pot. Go smoke 2 asparagus joints while soaking in a hot tub of Special MUD. This can be ordered from the HenHouse for a limited time only. If you call in the next 4 minutes we will send you a second jar of MUD  absolutely FREE. Shipping and Handling not included.
    After approximately 2 hours of the MUD soak you should be cured. Congratulations!
    See you at the Hen House *cluck*

    Disclaimer: Do not try this at home.Do not try this anywhere. Ever. Participants are trained professionals.The Cure has never actually been proven to be of benefit to anyone.

    Side Effects: The following side effects have been reported . Facial warts, gingivitis, nail fungus, pink eye, dish pan hands, measles, pregnancy, malaria, gallstones, beriberi, unwanted nasal hair, hemmorhoids, flatulence, nymphomania, narcissism and euphoria.

  • sas-schatzi
    sas-schatzi Member Posts: 15,894

    Oh my , Emily you have out done your self----------how much fun.  narcissism and euphoria. < I take exception to nymphomania-------i just want reasonable sex. Sex Sex Sex---------normal sex--------does it exist?

  • thefuzzylemon
    thefuzzylemon Member Posts: 631

    AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!  Gone fo ra bit but returned to see the CURE!!!  Emily!!!  ROCKSTAR!!!!  

    Emily and Sas .... I am thinking of you both.  I am perched on your shoulders and whispering in your ears ... "I am here sweetie.  You don't worry.  I will do all the worrying.  You focus on what you need." 

    XOXOXOXOXOXOOXOXOOX

    Veggy, I get so excited with your posts!!  I love to laugh and you really make me LAUGH!!!

  • veggy
    veggy Member Posts: 4,150

    WHOA!!!

  • veggy
    veggy Member Posts: 4,150

    Lets take a walk and talk.

  • veggy
    veggy Member Posts: 4,150
  • EmilyInOntario
    EmilyInOntario Member Posts: 288

    Nancy, someone came on the thread and accused us of being a bunch of cackling hens...and the funny thing is..I can't remember why..*L* Then the jokes really took off about us being chickens...
    *cluck* The accusation actually stimulated so much fun and hilarity that we owe the person a vote of thanks...

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