INSOMNIACS place to talk in the wee hours
Comments
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Thank you Sas.
Truly sorry to hear of 2ndTimeAround's bereavement.
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Oh my goodness! Who opened the flood gate? And how in the world do you keep the steel bowl behind your head without it falling? The one picture above is better than the one I cropped. Thank you for letting us know about 2nd's loss.She has gone through alot since I joined BCO. Do you know when the funeral is? We are heading to LA on the 19th to send DD to college.
Eeyore, yes war is tragic. It is good idea about recording oral history from my aunt and parents. You know now come to think of it, I have not had a conversation with them about it.
Lori, yay for the clear PET scan. Wow, chemo this Friday already. Yup, keep laughing or keep us laughing because we don't want you to start crying. But if you need to, it is ok also. I find that a good cry sometimes is cleansing.
Susan, Elena might be the next Missy Franklin or Natalie Coughlin. Ms. Sas is right...careful with exposing her to the Ipad.
Meadow, I am glad the car was moving slow enough for you to jump in without hitting anything.
JunieB, how is the swelling. Exercise is good, but not in a 97 degree weather while you are on a diuretic can enhance orthostatic hypotension, dizziness, or fainting.
ShepK, I don't think Marti appreciates having her picture taken while she has to wear the cone of shame. The poor girl frowns in that photo. You said that the tiger can't be Thirsty and only man is driven by "thirst". It is true that only man is driven by "thirst"- thirst for power, knowlege, recognition, fame, money, life, or love, to name a few, will drive him to invest most of his energy and time in it. His thirst won't be quenched until the needs are met. The tiger's name was supposed to be Thirsty, but because of clerical error its name was switched to Richard Parker, the hunter's name. The tiger assumed the name of the hunter and the hunter its name. Aren't tigers hunters, hunting for their preys? If only man is driven by "thirst", then maybe that was why the tiger's name was switched to Richard Parker. I would love to hear what Queenie, the queen of books, has to say. Very true regarding how the two stories at the end comes down to faith. A person can't believe in both stories otherwise he contradicts himself. Faith in a story that makes sense to the human mind vs. faith in a story that seems like a fantasy. Being theist vs. atheist, both require faith.
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BBL, need to walk Mitzy while it's still cool.
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Loverly - Very well said. I've never seen the movie, so wasn't aware it was so thought provoking. legs still swelling. Finally broke down and put on the wretched compression socks, along with the Lasix. Will see MO on Thursday for monthly appt.
So sorry to hear about secondtimearounds loss. My condolences.
My sister has her 48th birthday this month and she was telling me that her DH and sons are taking her on a surprise vacay, but not telling her where. Only what type of clothes to take. Sounds like cool idea. Hope she has fun.
BBL
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Well I had my PET scan today (to get a baseline for faslodex tx). Will be interesting to see if anything else has developed since April scan.
Had an interesting text conversation with my pcp friend today about the nature of the lung mets. When I was dxed with ovarian cancer in 2011 the CT showed 3 lesions on my left lung. It was noted at the time but nothing done about it. When I first saw MO 2 years ago he mentioned seeing them on the PET I had done at that time, but since they had been there 3 years before and unchanged, he was not concerned. Then the 1st scan after chemo he said they had shrunk. 1 year out scan, unchanged. Then April's scan, and I was sure he said they had grown and that was the cause of the biopsy. But last week when DH and I met with him I asked about it. If they were there the whole time, and biopsy shows they are BC, were they always BC?
His response was that the spot they biopsied was not the same spot from 2011. When I was texting with pcp tonight she said it was her understanding that they were. Why would he change his story (if indeed he did)?
Any guesses?
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I am hoping some of you can help me out.
I am a teacher involved in a summer workshop to learn how to prepare students for a science fair. As part of my requirements, I need to conduct a research project. I have created a survey about how a breast cancer diagnosis impacts our thoughts about death and dying.
The information I receive will be anonymous and it will only be viewed by other teachers in the workshop.
I am looking for female participants dx stages 1-3 with no evidence of recurrence.
If you would like to help me out, the survey can be found with the link below. The deadline for completing the survey is Monday, August, 8, 2016.
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Hi Debbi, haven't seen you for a long time. Sure, will fill out the survey. Hope you are well. School is starting soon for us.
Mags, why would a doctor change the story unless to protect himself?
JunieB, I am sorry to hear that the swelling has not resolved. Wonder if all the walking affected the swelling. Does elevating the legs help? I completely understand the panic of losing connection to BCO. I was once banned by the Mod by mistake for a few hours. Oh, the feeling of loss was great. Someone had asked me a question and I posted a link for her for reference. Something must have flagged the Mod of possible virus. I think after they investigated and found the site was harmless, they apologized and gave me back the access. I don't ever want to be banned again so I try to behave myself
Susan, hope the scan went ok and the result is favorable. Have you heard from MammaRay? I can imagine it has to be very frustrating trying to communicate and words don't come out the way you intend it to. Please send her our regards the next time you talk to her or her DH.
Sensi, do you have enough sick leave and vacation hours to cover your three month leave? At where I work, an employee could donate sick leaves to coworkers at the same pay level.
Ms. Chevy, are you still in a food coma from your three or four birthday celebrations? You are loved by your many daughters. Hehe
How did your scan go, ShepK?
Ok, where was I with the story? Oh yes, we were hiding in the field waiting for the guards to be out of sight before we scurried to the truck that had just arrived to take us to my dad. This truck was as big as the small Uhaul truck, I think. When you are young, things seem bigger than they really are. When we got on the back of the truck, I was surprised to see there were other people already in there. It was dark so I couldn't see anyone's face. I could not tell you how many were in there. I don't rememeber any one talking maybe because most were tired and sleepy, either that or they were as scare as me. I think I dozed off for awhile. It must have been really early in the morning when we finally boarded the boat as the sun had not risen yet and it didn't seem as dark as when we got in the truck. It was my first time and probably for most there to set foot on the boat unless they were fishermen. I remember I was cold to my bones and shivering uncontrollably and not understood why. Come to think of it, not only was I scared, I was probably wet from trying to get on the boat. My body was reacting to both stimuli or whatever you call it. I was in a daze the next few days. Could barely eat or drink in and out of sleep and wake up only to throw up. I think the majority of the people had the same problem as me. We were all on the same boat (pun intended; I had to add that). I was throwing up until I had nothing left in my tummy to expel, not even gall or saliva. I don't think I used the toilets for days. The only times I felt decent was when I slept. Poor Mom was pregnant at the time. I think her sea sickness was worse than mine. She couldn't be there to comfort me or my siblings. Dad was manning the boat with my uncles. My aunt took care of us and her five kids. None knew how to navigate the boat except Dad. He needed a break after a few days and let one of my uncles take over. I think Dad thought that we were far away enough from VN and it was safe to continue south towards our neighboring countries. Now, my uncle didn't know how to read the compass/map properly. Not sure how long Dad was able to rest before I woke up to loud conversations between my dad and uncle. Dad had his binoculars and was looking intently at a dark mole shape at the end of the horizon. After a few minutes, he started yelling for my uncle to turn the boat back immediately. Several smaller boats were heading towards us. We were on our way to one of the islands in VN where prisoners were kept! Thank God our boat was far enough that they could not catch up with us. And also thank to Him that I didn't have any fluid in my bladder or I would have peed in my pants. At one point I had the energy to get up to try to eat. Not sure how many days after our departure. Rice had never tasted so good, but it was not long before I threw up most of what I ate. We ran out of water I don't know how long into our trip. I remember the 360 degree view of the calming vast ocean around us. Our boat seemed tiny compared to it. All this water and we could not drink it. What unfair temptation! I couldn't help but wondered if we would ever see land again. I was really thirsty but there was no drinkable water. It was sunny and hot and I fell asleep with parched dry mouth and throat. Who would have thought that after 37 year I still remember the moment in my sleep when I could taste and feel the cool juicy watermelon in my mouth. I woke up from my nap with my thirst quenched. I can't explain to you why, but choose to believe that it was not hallucination from dehydration, but it's God's way of showing me His grace/love. If it was hallucination, I think I would still be thirsty. Not long after this we crossed path with another boat. It was not uncommon to have Thai pirates roaming in this part of the ocean. We have heard of stories of robbing (most VN people carry gold and jewelry with them on their trip), and kidnapping of woman and children to sell as sex slaves. All the women and children were sent down to the lower deck to hide. It turned out that the boat belongs to fishermen. They didn't speak the same language I was told later. These kind fishermen gave us fish, rice, water, and ice. Ice! It was perfect timimg as we ran out of food. Another miracle. Dad said we were on sea for 7 days before we landed in Malaysia where we camped for 3 months before entering US. There were many shipwrecks, missing people, and lost lives. My dad's cousin and his wife along with someone's innocent child, who left several months after us, were tossed into the sea by men they had an argument with the day before. Everyone on our boat survived. Why were we spared and many perished? Was it because of our good deeds as some Buddhists, including my mother, believed? I think it was God's mercy that I was preserved and pardoned from death to tell you the story of His grace.
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Whoa! Loverly - Thank you so much for sharing that.
How was the walk with Mitzy?
The walking helps to increase circulation by getting the muscles moving and pushing the fluid up so my body can expel it. I experienced such fatigue today that I barely made it up a small incline in a sidewalk to the P.T.'s office. Weird. Having bloodwork tomorrow, so I see what that shows. Treatment too. Going to the docotor is getting so old.
Shep & Susan - Hope your scans went well today.
Mags - Any time you have concerns or there seems to be some miscommunication in regard to your test results or treatment, feel free to say "Hey, back that train up and tell me/explain that again" and don't let anyone dismiss your concerns. This is your life & your body, and you have the opportunity to be your very best advocate. You will be the one who has to live with whatever treatment that is prescribed. So you have every right to understand everything thoroughly, even if you have to ask tons of questions. Your deserve that.
So Jazzy - When's the patio party? :0)
Sensi - I sure hope you have some type of program through your employer that will help you during the 3 mos. off work. When I was dx'd with the primary bone cancer in 2000 I was working for a county agency and they had a catastrophic leave bank where other employees could donation sick leave for individuals dealing with major medical crisis.
Sas - So NOT making fun of you! But I had the hardest time today not picturing you with that stainless steel bowl on your head. Really it was a very ingenious solution to your problem at the time.
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lover, can't wait to read your story you posted....but to late right now
Mags....I have no answer for you, but I do know that there has to be a "certain" amount of cancer to be picked up by a test. Biopsy I would think that would be black and white...but not sure. And that would be the pathologists mistake. I have always said I want my radiologist and pathologist in on all my consults...ha, they don't do that . But they are the ones diagnosing us. I had a path report come back positive about 5 ish years after first dx. It was a quick biopsy done right there in the office. Needle biopsy. When it got cultured out over the three days, it came back no cancer. Pathologist called me personally and apologized. Now, almost 6 years now, i got recurrence ....and yes you can guess, same spot . I have realized over the years, it's not an exact science. Mistakes have been made over my 16 years, but I do have a great doc. Best you can, make sure your doc is doing the best he can. Wish it was a perfect science. Prayers your way as you move forward
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:Loverly: thank you for sharing that.
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Lover, you must get your parents' stories and those of your relatives. What you and your family went through needs to be preserved for future generations. This explains how sensitive you are to others. Thank you for sharing your story.
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loverly, I am speechless after reading your story. Just cannot imagine. I feel you are a very special person, thank you.
SAS, you made me laugh.
Looking forward to the fantastic Olympics.
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Loverly ~ You and your family truly were graced by God. To all survive the journey, the kindness of the fishermen..... I agree with Eeyore and Kath, those memories need to be written down and passed on. I'm hoping that people in Malaysia were kind and that you had good food and decent shelter while there. You say you camped for three months? That brings images of your Husband's "quarters" on his last few missions. Gosh. Were you able to bring anything from home with you? I want to say how brave I think you all are, to have not only endured and survived, but to go on to thrive. "Brave" just doesn't convey all the emotions and respect properly. I wish I could come up a better word. Thank you again for sharing. You all are miracles.
And I am so sorry to have made you watch PI! (hiding my face under a pillow in shame)
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I will be back later to catch up more. I am recovering from an all day mis-adventure. Pris Kitty sucks. She brought her first snake home the other night. It was adorable, just a baby water snake, and I easily caught it and tossed outside. This morning she snuck a mouse in. And let it go in my bathroom. Where it promptly ran into my adjoining walk in closet! I have been in this house 16 years. That closet is scarey.....I don't even know what all is in there! I started toting things out of the closet until we found the mouse. Several times Pris had it just where she needed it to be to easily catch it. She'd poke at it, the mouse would go all to squeaking......then she'd let it go! I grabbed it by the tail once but it slipped away. Just when I thought for sure we had it.....Pris let it squish under the bathroom door and escape into the den. Ack! FFH was on his way out and said he'd bring some mouse traps back when he got home. I wanted the mouse out now! They poop and pee and chew on stuff. No manners at all. I like them outside, not in my house.
After looking and looking for the damned thing and realizing that perhaps only one of us (not the cat) had a vested interest in the mouse's removal. I had enough. I grabbed my .32 and loaded my .22 and laid them out to quickly grab. By this time I desperately needed to use the loo. Sure enough the rat bastard chose that moment to squeeze back under the bathroom door and run into my closet. I quickly washed my hands, opened the door and let Pris back in. We again cornered the mouse several times. Then Pris got bored and left. I took over.
This is the text and pic I sent FFH:
F*ck That Mouse!
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Shep, wow! Good shot
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ShepKi: which one finally nailed it? .32 or .22? Is it the bullet hole on the base board?
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Introducing:
The Good----Pris
The Bad------ShepK
The Ugly------Rat
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what a beautiful story lover...and I just read it after listening to my two fav Christian songs...potters hand, and praise you in the rain. Perfect setting for your story. Your family is a true inspiration. There is a a song, country Christian, can't remember name, but it talks about what we leave behind. Maybe by randy Travis. About the good we leave behind for others to carry on and learn from. You show us well, and you have a lot more love inside you to keep on doing that. You go girl :
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shepkitty, still laughing:)
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Holy crap Shep, you really meant business. LOL
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Shep!!!!- I cannot believe you actually shot that poor mouse. I'm calling PETA right now.
Now who's gonna fill that bullet hole young lady? Dang, note to self, "Don't p--s off Shep" Loverly - Are you sure you don't have the "Good" and the "Bad" mixed up? After all it is Pris that brought the mouse into the house in the first place?
Saw my MO today, had treatment and started the Ibrance again. ANC was 1.2, but MO agreed to let me continue on the Ibrance even if my ANC goes down to .80 as long as I don't spike a fever. Otherwise 1.0. If it goes as low as .5-.6, off to the hospital I think she said. So we'll see how this plan goes.
Susan - Have you gotten your results back from your scans yet? How are you feeling? Any news about the puppy?
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Loverly, wow what a traumatic experience leaving VN must have been for you and your family! God had you all in the palms of His hands! Amazing story!
Shep, great shot! I wonder what Pris Kitty will bring you next!
My hubby has been feeding my critters for me the past month or so. My baby raccoons came by for a visit last night. They have to be a different bunch as I'm sure they had to have grown a lot more in the past 4 weeks? The plate that the critter food is on is a regular sized dinner plate...
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OMG! You girls are going stark raving MAD! You shot a... a MOUSE???
That is more like a mole, or a ..... what ARE those things??? Did your cat bring that IN? Or did that.... whatever.... bring the cat in?
Where do you live, by the way? In the wilderness somewhere? And you actually SHOT it with THAT?? GOOD JOB Sheppers! Don't mess with HER, that bad-ass Calamity Jane person!!!
We have teeny-tiny mice around HERE, because we live next to an irrigation ditch... Picture follows.... But THOSE meeces are only like 1/2 inch long! Is that an AK 947 or something? Are those even LEGAL??
You guys, don't TELL! I know some Texas Rangers that would frown upon those goings on!
THAT is the funniest story I have heard in a long time! I LOVE that picture, you wild woman you! But that is no mouse... that is a some sort of hand-me-down from a burrowing beaver or something.
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This is where meeces live... tiny little ones...
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Loverly- I am going to read your story there when I have more time this weekend. Back to client site this week and super busy!
Patio party will be in Sept, which should have us past the heat and the rains. June and July have been super hot and now we are getting tons of late monsoonal moisture which means afternoon rains. By Sept, all that will be done and think I will do it anywhere from the 2nd to third weekend of Sept. End of the summer party, fall equinox celebration!
I have a friend who wanted to come visit around then but has not made any commitment on it with me and now she has shingles and is freaked out about that. So better for her to come another time, right?
Mags- hugs sister. There may be some cya going on here.
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Jazz, good luck on staying on ibrance. Made appt for test next we. Can't drag these feet any longer. Puppy still in the house of horrors. My brother decided not to let me train it:(
Mom fell yesterday and broke her humorous . Hope this moves my brothers behind to get live in help during the day for her. He starts back to teaching in 3 weeks, and she is in her sling/ cast for 8 weeks. He actually said, I don't know what to do with mom when I go back to work. She is going to need help. I just calming said that he needs to call homeinstead or living Angels and interview over the next 3 weeks. He has time to get someone in. I have never understood people who can't see what needs to be done. And than they think there are all these options. Nooooooooo there is almost always a right course to take. Just do it.
Went to a reformer class yesterday. I have finally stopped pouting about my inability to run any more, and took a proactive step to try to find something else. I loved it!! Will def be signing up.
Off to counseling, then to lunch with Claire and Elena . Fun day
Chevster, love the garden. But I thcan't know you could add more stuff
my daughter said if we put one more Nicky Nacky thing in our yard she is sending us off to the home
Have a good and blessed day girls
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Chef. That was suppose to say I think you can add more stuff.
I need to get this I pad over and get it fixed. My auto correct is driving me nuts
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Susan, What is a reformer class?
Feline, Loved the cartoon.
Chevy, I agree that was really large for a mouse.
Our friend had a close his cat door after he discovered the cat was holding it open for raccoons.
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