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Any 40-ish survivors?

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  • mamachick
    mamachick Member Posts: 154
    edited May 2012

    Just wanted to pop in to say I am so sorry, Kiwiwmum.  No words can express how much this is just not right.  Thinking about you and praying for you!

    Eema_ I hope you are doing better!

    I know I have missed a lot, but I am thinking about you all.

  • Eema
    Eema Member Posts: 403
    edited May 2012

    I feel so bad for kiwi, but really, it a loss for all of us. It is taking me a LONG time to get over this mess. Now I think I have fluid under my incisions. Gross. I see the PA tomorrow.



    Breast cancer certainly has slowed me down, but I'm not out yet. Thank you ladies for being here for us all

  • Terryberry23
    Terryberry23 Member Posts: 12
    edited May 2012

    Girls ever feel like we are too young for this disease. I went to a group survivor meeting today and had been told they were young survivors. They were all 50 plus. I just want to connect with people in my area like me.

    I think sometimes one reason I feel depressed is nobody my age can really get my fears and feelings.

  • burley
    burley Member Posts: 248
    edited May 2012

    Hi girls :-)

    Kiwi-I'm so sorry for the loss of your friend.  I can't believe how young she was.  Don't ever worry about coming here with sadness or problems-that's what is so great about this group.  We're here for eachother no matter what.

    Eema-belated happy that all you had was a UTI!  I hope there's nothing wrong with your incisions.  Yay for an appointment tomorrow.

    Debbie-I can't find you on Facebook, sorry.  Can you try finding me?  Kim Melvin, it's a new close up picture of me with short hair and glasses.  I broke down and took a picture that my husband thought was good enough for Facebook.  I hate pictures since this whole BC thing.

    When was the last time I got on?  Did I tell you my broken wrist healed displaced?  Good times.  So I was referred to an ortho hand specialist but couldn't get in until the 30th.  I'm probably going to have to have surgery to correct it (because I need a little more surgery in my life.)  This latest doc last week told me to take the brace off a little and use my hand.  ??  It feels like my hand is going to snap off at the wrist-still so painful.  He said "the damage is already done."  Nice.  So I vacuumed and used the steam cleaner on the floors this weekend.  And I've been paying for it ever since.

    I hope everyone has a terrific rest of the day! 

  • christine47
    christine47 Member Posts: 846
    edited May 2012

    Kiwimum, I am so sorry for your loss.  How unfair this disease is, I am thinking of you and praying for peace in your heart today.

  • lrr4993
    lrr4993 Member Posts: 504
    edited May 2012

    Kiwi - I am so sorry.  32 years old is far too young.  It makes me so sad.

  • bdavis
    bdavis Member Posts: 3,192
    edited May 2012

    Debbie.. I can't find you either.. friend me at Betsy Schreier Davis

  • sarah1968uk
    sarah1968uk Member Posts: 327
    edited May 2012

     I echo everyone else's thoughts, Kiwimum. So sorry for the loss of your friend.

     Sarah xx

  • bgirl
    bgirl Member Posts: 435
    edited May 2012

    Kiwimum - I think what we share here is life.  Life has its ups and downs.  Happy and sad.  I think is good that we can share it all with people we know will understand.  So sorry for the loss of your friend.  Life really isn't fair sometimes.

  • odie16
    odie16 Member Posts: 1,415
    edited May 2012

    Kiwimum  - my heart goes out to you. I hope your memories will help comfort you during the darkest time.... Hugs.

    Debbie - I am so with you. Why can't it be Friday already? Dang!

  • kiwimum
    kiwimum Member Posts: 485
    edited May 2012

    Terryberry - we are definitely too young for this.  We are supposed to die of old age in our Eighties or Nineties ... and I'm sure we will. I'm planning to!

    There are some great survivor threads in the Stage Three section which perk me up when I need it.  Five Years Out is one of them where you get ladies who are 10+ years posting.

    With all the advances in medicine I wish they'd find a cure. Easy to say, hard to do.

  • chantal10
    chantal10 Member Posts: 34
    edited May 2012

    Hi! I'm a newbie here! I was 40 at dx. I turned 41 last week. I can't figure out my new normal. I am always pissed off, grouchy and in pain. I do not want sex. I just want to be by myself. My 2 young children are busy and demanding. I feel that i have totally lost control. I'm tired yet not sleep. I'm depressed. I was proud and feeling for a few weeks at first, now i feel like I'm sinking. I want to be happy!

  • sagina
    sagina Member Posts: 849
    edited May 2012

    Welcome Chantal. I totally understand your frustration. I lost all control at work....and I was the one IN control all the time at work.  It's like everyone turned in to little kids without a parent to discipline them.  I felt taken advantage of when at every turn I was told "but you said" or "you never told me that" knowing darn well I was having memory issues.  Well pass the hallelujah cause the memory is getting better and I'm back to answering them with, but yes I did tell you, remember you were on your personal phone call and I was standing at your desk.....Yep, I'm back.  I hope things get better for you quickly, from looking at your dx and surgeries you have been thought a lot.

    Kiwi, I am so sorry for your loss. Cancer sucks.

    On the we are very young topic - when I had my thyroid biopsy the radiologist asked in disbelief if I was really a breast cancer survivor...then he said, but your so young. Does the medical profession still think you have to have had hormone replacement therapy to get breast cancer? I've met so many women younger than me battling this beast. Texasrose on this board is 28 with two small children and stage four. No one believed her that she had a lump, they kept discounting it to breast feeding.  She has continued to hold her held up and smile though this whole thing. I had the privilege of meeting her when a few of us got together from the boards.  

  • Eema
    Eema Member Posts: 403
    edited May 2012

    Girls, I'm back in the ER. Doc didnt like how I looked. I'm sad. Tomorrow is my birthday!

  • momx3
    momx3 Member Posts: 126
    edited May 2012

    Welcome Chantal!!!

    Eema, I hope they figure it out!!!

    Whoever feels depressed, can't remember and just plain OUT OF CONTROL, don't feel like you are alone.... Yah right!  I truly wish I could have ALL of you kicking me in the butt when I start feel like I'm in a bucket!!! My daughter, now that she is home, ignores me until I stop saying I'm stupid for not remembering things, inlcuding what I just said or what just happened Yell SOO AGGRAGATING!!! 

    Tomorrow is the muscle/nerve test. UGH!!! Did I ever mention that I hate drs & needles???? Well guess what? Loraz, here I come!!!

    I will look you all up on FB tonight and see if I can find you!!! 2 of my kids are hm and so is my niece, YAH!!! tech help :)

    Have a great.... WAIT... what comes next???? LOL

  • chantal10
    chantal10 Member Posts: 34
    edited May 2012

    Thanks for the support ladies! It's so nice to know that I'm not alone in the lack of memory dept. I have had a friend recently upset about my not returning her phone calls in a timely manner, I plain and simple kept forgetting to call her back. People/family think everything is back to normal now and it simply is not true.



    Does anyone have experience with fat grafting? I am concerned about disrupting other body parts to improve my breast area. Specifically, does it deform or mishape or leave unsightly scars from the donor area, let's say from the thighs or abdomen?



    Happy birthday Eema! Fellow Taurus girl! :)



    Thank you!

  • burley
    burley Member Posts: 248
    edited May 2012

    Welcome Chantal!  Wonderful group of ladies here :)

    Eema-I'm so sorry you're back to the hospital!  Ugh.  No fair on your birthday-I hope they don't have to admit you.  If they do, make someone bring you cupcakes.

    I was posting to our group on Facebook, and here's what I have to say about nipples:  go with 3D tatts.  These nipples of mine are "on" all the time, and it makes it hard to wear a tight or light colored shirt.  So I end up wearing a lot of black loose shirts.  I can't wait until my kids go to bed at night so I can put on a tank top.  Just my opinion.

    When I started this group, I was still having sex on a regular basis.  That sounds funny to say, but it's just you girls.  As time as gone on over the past year, we are hardly having any sex at all.  My fault.  I have absolutely no desire-damn forced menopause.  My hubby has been really patient, although he kids me about it every couple of days.  Like right now, I broke my wrist on April 2nd, and we haven't had sex since.  I honestly don't know when the last time was.  Poor guy. 

  • kiwimum
    kiwimum Member Posts: 485
    edited May 2012

    Hi and welcome Chantal. Great bunch of ladies here with experience in everything!

    Eema - you poor thing.  I hope you get home soon and don't have to be admitted. Thinking of you.

    Debbie - I FB friended you - Rawinia is my name.

    Some beautiful tributes have been flowing for my friend Kylie.  She put up a courageous fight and deserves to rest now. I find comfort in that. She will be missed but never forgotten.

    It's a beautiful sunny day here - everything seems better when the sun is shining.

  • kmur
    kmur Member Posts: 849
    edited May 2012

    Hi Girls,

    Eema..Hope you are home so you can wake up in the morning on YOUR birthday in your own bed....I hope you are better.

    Kiwimum...I head to the stage 3-- 5 years out thread too sometimes. Can you believe the last one 7 years out with a huge tumor and horrible path report...and she is doing great. It does my heart good,but makes my heart ache for the girls like your friend...sometimes all this BC stuff seems far away and sometimes not.

    Welcome Chantal, Some of us  here have had fat grafting ..some twice. I will most likely have another round soon. I had fat taken from an area above the rear ( kinda love handle). I have no signs/scars. The fat was placed around the implant to give more shape. I had nipple/areola surgery with a skin graft taken from the bikini line and they look very natural, I am pleased with the result. I do still have some rippling but it is minor. With time, I think you will feel like you again. The livestrong program at the Y was a real help for me to begin to get my body/mind in the right place.

    I have to tell you all a funny story about my increasing goofiness ...I took cookies to my new co workers. I was getting ready to leave and one of my co workers (who makes the most beautiful flower arrangements and is difficult for me to understand,as she speaks Spanish and I wish I could) ANYWAY...She asked if I was leaving and I said yes..so she said "see you later alligator"  and....in my George Bush moment ...I said "See you gater alli-later" What???? Oh gosh, somehow all that just could not come out correctly...I felt like a dingbat ( again)

    anyway...hope you all are doing well tonight,

    Kim

    Have a good night you all 

  • momx3
    momx3 Member Posts: 126
    edited May 2012

    :/ So I can't find you on FB Kim.

    According to FB, you should be able to find me at www.facebook.com/jimdeb86

    Hopefully that will find me!! I hate being lost!!! LOL

    OK, time for ambien, although I might already be headed that direction.

    GOOD NIGHT!!!

  • kmur
    kmur Member Posts: 849
    edited May 2012

     Happy Birthday Eema, Hope you are much better today....it is too early to toast ( drink I mean) LOL...later though......I will raise a glass and wish for only good health and just all good things.

    Love to all,

    Kim

  • burley
    burley Member Posts: 248
    edited May 2012

    Happy Birthday, Eema!  Let us know how you're feeling :-)

  • Eema
    Eema Member Posts: 403
    edited May 2012

    Thanks for all the birthdays wishes ladies! I'm home and weak, but feeling a little better.



    Going to take a nap.



    Xoxox

  • kiwimum
    kiwimum Member Posts: 485
    edited May 2012

    Happy Birthday wishes Eema. I'm so happy you are home and will join Kim to raise a glass to you! Here's to good health!!

  • momx3
    momx3 Member Posts: 126
    edited May 2012

    Hmm, I just read our forum<<<<< We have a growing friendship during treatments too!!! LOL

    Happy Birthday Eema!!! I hope you are feeling better!! Did they evr figure out what was going on???

  • odie16
    odie16 Member Posts: 1,415
    edited May 2012

    Happy Birthday Eema! Hope you're feeling better!

  • chantal10
    chantal10 Member Posts: 34
    edited May 2012

    Happy birthday Eema! I hope you are sleeping soundly and get this note tomorrow.



    Burley, thanks for the info on the nipples. Do you regret getting them? Did it make the reconstruction feel more complete? I love not having to deal with wearing a bra at home cuz the no nipple, but when I look at myself with out nipples I feel strange, kind like having a face with out a nose. Kinda. Sigh. Anyone else have any nipple news? Ha!



    Kmur, thanks for the fat grafting info. Would you say that you are pleased with results and suggest it? There's been no comprimise in appearance of fat donor area? Part of me, a huge part, just wants to leave things be if only to avoid the trauma of another surgery. The thought of coming out and off of anesthesia makes me shiver... Yuck!



    Kiwimum, I love your name! I want to eat you up! :)



    Sagina, my sister's name is Gina. :) She is 38 and went for her first mammogram early in my honor and all looks normal and clear, phew!



    Momx3, hi! I know what you mean about needing a kick in the arse. I was listening to myself talk today to 2 of my mom friends and I just wanted to tell myself to stfu! I feel like my mommy friends (my kids are 2 and 4 years old, hence "mommy") that I see almost daily are so great and supportive but i feel like everyone is ready to see the "old" me again if only to make them more comfy around me, but unfortunately I don't know where that person is anymore... Here I am again, wah, wah, wah, wah. Like Charlie Brown's teacher talking! Lol

  • joanneasiata
    joanneasiata Member Posts: 305
    edited May 2012

    Hi there ladies I'm 47 dx 3 yrs ago I'm now on 6 mths visits with my onco and on tamoxifen and now in the middle of doing ct scans pelvic region ultra sound and full body bone scan been having trouble with hip so I'd say after this and all clear results I'll feel a bit more free to finally get on with my life it's hard to move on and not to be scared that it's going to come back I would like to hang here from time to time and get to know you lovely ladies a bit more

    Jojo

  • momx3
    momx3 Member Posts: 126
    edited May 2012

    Chantel, I know how you feel (CRAP<<<< tears) about wanting to be ME. I don't even know who me is. Guess that in my mixed up memory places...LOL

    One day we WILL look back at all this andit will truly be a memory that won't be forgotten, BUT one that will show just how strong we can be!!!!!

  • sagina
    sagina Member Posts: 849
    edited May 2012

    Hello moderators. Can you please add a like button to the comments one day? Sometimes there just aren't words to answer back, but a little check mark "like" lets us know others get it.

    So for now, like, like, like, like, and one more like. You women are fantastic.