Single life after a mastectomy
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Just had to share....
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Sorry I've been gone a couple of days. Too busy and awake most of the night every night finishing whatever work needs to be done.
BB & Jazzy - Thanks for the advice and feedback.
BB - I didn't talk directly with my oncologist. A nurse talked with her and then called me. I took Tamoxifen for 2-1/2 years, and I was supposed to switch to the AI. I'm expecting this next AI to lead to hair loss, too, but the nurse said maybe not... we'll see.
Jazzy - I'm sorry you're having so much joint trouble. Like you, I wasn't sure about the joint discomfort. I've been assuming I'm just out of shape. But, now I'm thinking back to the leg pain I had while on Tamoxifen - it probably was related to the pills. They say these pills cause these kinds of SEs, so that must be what's happening to both of us.
Anyway, I don't have the money right now for the Femara, so I decided to try a little experiment: I simply stopped taking the anastrozole 3-4 days ago. Now I'm not taking anything except a baby aspirin and Vitamin D. (I feel so FREE!) Maybe it's my imagination, but it seems the hair strands aren't falling as rapidly from my head now. My knees are still bothering me. Again, the hair loss could've been an overreaction on my part. I don't know.
LOL @ the comics - "woman with breast cancer, man with flu" - LOL - So true!
Enerva - Congratulations on your first open house.
Sorry that you had to return to the other job that you don't like. Also, I hope you're feeling better soon.
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10/6- back to work today and it went okay. Client seems grateful to have me in helping. It is a real mess there, more so than when I left at the end of June. I will do what I can to help, because that is what we consultants do.....
Life- my joint pain is much better than it used to be, especially with working out more via the personal trainer. The things that bother me the worst are my feet (which already had plantars faciitis) and elbows. It was heaven when I got to take the 6 week vacation from the AIs last year. I hear you on that feeling of freedom. Makes us feel a bit more normal, doesn't it?
Hope everyone had a decent start to the week!
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Jazzy - That's great that the personal trainer has been able to help you feel better. I wish we all could enjoy permanent freedom from these medications.
OK, I'm not obsessing over the hair loss. I know women of all ages - including very young women - who never had breast cancer but are suffering from much more hair loss than I'm experiencing. There are worse things in life. Also, I always had a thinner hairline around the temples.
My hair looks very thick from the back:
In the front... well, I didn't have this spot before. (This isn't my imagination - that's a small bald spot, right? LOL) It took only six months on Arimidex for this to happen:
There are worse things in life. I can deal with this by parting my hair to the side. Maybe this is just a coincidence and I would've lost hair, anyway. But, I wonder how much further the hair loss will spread because of the AIs.
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Life- hair loss can come with menopause too. I got thrown into that when I had my ruptured appendix and TAH right around the same time as diagnosis. Looks like you had your ovaries out in 2013 which took away estrogen and now we have more gone. Your photos don't look that bad to me, but did not know the before. Your hair looks very full and healthy otherwise. Since you went off the AIs, maybe watch to see if you see new hair growing in the thinning areas?
Off to work, wishing everyone a good day.
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Jazzy - Thanks - yes, my hair looks fine for now. I always had enormous hair, though. For most of my life, I wanted to have thinner hair. And I expected early menopause and ovary removal to lead to some hair loss.
But, last month, hair strands were falling as rapidly as they did at the start of chemo. It was out of the ordinary. So, I'm looking for a solution before the hair loss increases.
The AIs do seem to speed up hair thinning - but not for all women! So, to anyone else out there reading this - don't fret - you might not experience hair loss at all on AIs.
You have a good day, too, Jazzy!
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In the backyard this morning! Will have some better pics from the week will be coming with time.
Hoping everyone here is doing okay. Made it through the first two days on the contract. So far, so good.
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BB - Thanks for the tips. I wish the AIs would take the hair from other parts of my body - like my underarms and legs. LOL. I posted a photo above but deleted it later because I realized it really didn't show the diminishing hairline that I'm seeing in the mirror. So, I'm going to keep a photo journal of my hairline for myself, just to see if there's really any difference as the AIs continue.
Like you, I wouldn't care as much about vanity if I were married to a good husband. But I have a suspicion that those types of men are few and far between, anyway. I have another suspicion that I'll admit right here, just between all of us: I suspect that even the good husbands aren't exactly what they appear to be. (I was married to one who appeared to be a good guy.)
Meanwhile, being a single woman does have its benefits - if only we could become completely independent of the exes. That seems to be the key - financial independence. How to achieve that at this point in life... I don't know, but that's my goal. Somehow, some way.
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BB - I hear ya'. I'm in a bad place, too, financially. If only I knew I'd be in this situation... I would've held onto some kind of paying job... just to keep my foot in the door somewhere. I also wish I'd held onto my savings instead of wasting it on college courses. I should've hidden my own money, instead of handing my little paycheck over to the husband when my children were little and I was working part time. Several years ago, I took money from a very small pension I'd had at one job (it was only $2,000), and I spent it on family expenses - activities for the kids, gifts for the husband and my family. I wish I still had that money - I could've used it to pay off my own medical bills.
Oh, well, there must be a solution to our problems. If I find one, I'll let you know about it. If you find one, I hope you'll let me know, too. ;-)
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jazzy - what a nice view you got there.
happy hump day
everyone!! our office started banking hours (a weeks hours) so we'll
have the holidays off for two weeks. so working some extra hours. just
finished a deadline last friday and working towards the next one.
boy....i am tired but i am also happy.BB - it gets me upset everytime i read about your ex. what an a$$hole. take care of yourself.....living well is the best revenge. (((hugs)))
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June- enjoy those holiday days off! Do something nice for yourself!
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Good morning friends. Through my first week on the new contract and so far so good. I look forward to getting some cash coming in next week.
I wanted to share this video of the balloon fiesta mass ascension this morning. After two rainy days and some cancelled, events, the weather is shaping up beautifully for the last weekend of this event (started last sat, ends tomorrow).
Hope everyone is doing okay here and have a good weekend!
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Jazzy - The video wouldn't work for me, but the photos on the side looked great. It must've been a beautiful event. Glad to hear the new job is going well!
Wow, the conversation here has slowed down. I know many here are working hard and busy making some life changes. I hope the absences also mean that all of you are out enjoying what the world has to offer.
I was trying to find a way into freelance work for a while, but now I think the income would be too unreliable. Plus, I need insurance. So, I'm looking into other options now.
BB - One of the local clothing stores is hiring, and I noticed they offer medical insurance for part time work. I'll be looking more closely into that option myself. If you're interested, too, just PM me.
Goodnight!
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hi ladies
Haven't posted here for ages but I do still keep an eye on this section. My single life still continues but another roadblock has come in the way. Found out I have dcis in my right breast (my first diagnosis was the left). It's not invasive so surgery will take care of it. Also means my planned recon on the left which was in December has been put back and I decided to have the right off and I'm having an expander in and down the track the lat dorsi on the left masectomy side. Just when I was starting to feel pretty ok with myself and how I look...
I'm glad they caught it early though so I guess it's better to wait until I'm fully done to consider looking for any guys who could show interest. My confidence was at a good level before this latest thing but I'm hoping when I have two boobies again I will be "ready" to meet someone. Although I don't know how to know if I'm ready or just impatient lol
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Life- some retail work with benefits sounds like a great way to get some income going again. I bet BB would be great at that too, I can tell she is a fashionista. Let the interviewing begin......
Sorry about the link not working. Cutting and pasting links seems to not always be effective.
Melp- I am sorry to hear about the DCIS, but glad that you will only need a little surgery for that. Perhaps not the time yet to find love, but it is going to be there for you when you are through a few more things and ready. Glad you are still here with us. When is your DCIS surgery?
Enerva, Milky, Piper, June and everyone else, hope you are doing okay this weekend.
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Hi Jazz, BB, Life and all other ladies, I have been absent due to gallbladder surgery on October 3rd. I was finally ready to jump back into life in early September, but after 8 painful attacks....the bad gallbladder with stones was removed!
Jazz, so glad your consulting work is going well. BB and Life - I am praying you each find the right job...one that you will love with chances to meet new people...you know what I am talking about!
I read each post, and I am still here.
Hugs,
Lisa
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Hi BB! I have missed you! I still have pain, but mostly tired! How are you? I always think of you, because I want you to be happy!!!! Lisa
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one day at a time is the perfect advice for this disease!
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Lili- RI- I am glad you are through your surgery and on the mend. I know GB stuff is very scary and painful. On the other side of it and hopefully on the mend. Lots of fatigue with abdominal surgeries so be sure to take care of yourself. Do you have folks around to help you during your recovery period?
Good to see others popping in her today. Hoping we hear from Enerva and Milkyway next.
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hi ladies, checking in.
BB - hope things are going for a better turn for you.
Just been running errands all weekend. Exercise grocery shopping and stuff. Going to take a shower and enjoy the rest of the day.
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BB- I am sorry you may have to move. Do you have family that can give you a space in there home to live until you get back on your feet? It is going to happen too.
Bdavis was here a month or so ago but not seen her since.
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jazzygirl my surgery is actually next Monday...are the expanders as hard as everyone says they are?? That's the bit im dreading..
haven't really been focusing much on relationship until recently before the dcis. I've still got some emotional issues to work out and old ways of thinking to cast away.
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HAHAHA BB.....I just logged in as I have a few extra minutes and I am procrastinating the final leg of writing up my proposal for my CAP (Professional contribution program/clinical advancement program) project. I did not realize how much I had already written and saved, so I feel slightly better.
I also have to make an adjunct informative piece to the training program for volunteers already in place and for the nursing staff.
I have a clearer vision and focus. Just need to submit and get clarification on a few things to shore it all up.
I am no where closer to any of my goals. And in fact have been playing an extreme hermit (outside of going to work and some professional seminars).
I went to dinner with my Aunt and Uncle last evening. I haven't seen them in years. It is my fathers brother and his wife. They were the one family on that side we were the closest to. They had 6 children and we were all ( my sister and cousin-who lived with us from moms side) all within age range of each other. 3 kids have died. It has been hard on them coupled with their own health problems. I know my one cousin meant well, but a couple of years ago, he advised I leave them alone for a while to deal with their many life changes. I decided I wasn't going to wait much longer and called and the rest is history. They live less than 20 minutes from me. They know I do not keep in touch with my father, but know it doesn't mean I have to ignore them. I enjoyed their company. They are so giving and gracious and I have missed out on having any family connection like that for some time. It was a positive and healthy move.
It was lovely here in SW PA. I went for a 3.7 mile walk and ran a few errands.
I had it out with my son several weeks ago...just a little. He pissed me off over a few things and then remarked I am no help. Guess I am either old school or advanced beyond my time...but I am not going to have a son that expects certain things from people.
I have never been codependent. Not starting now. Blew a gasket (PMS didn't help)
And he has done some things in the last couple of weeks to make up for it.
YEAH!
My cousin (not blood related-my moms BFF from her early days is my "AUNT") and I are going to the Steelers game on Nov 2. I am disappointed in my team this year. Just don't have it together. Lost to the Brownies UGH!!!!!
We just decided to attend the Jazz Festival in New Orleans this coming Spring. Making initial plans. My first. I am so excited. A couplet we tailgate with at the football games may go as well. They are around our age and tons of fun.
Definitely something to look forward to!!!!!
My widow friend and I have been hit or miss. He is my only casual companion for now and I am not in the market for anything else at the moment.
I am looking to explore a professional venture in another state. Not a place most would seek. I am at a point in my career where I have to determine what is a good fit for me. If for nothing else I can explore how an independent facility cares for infants in my area of specialty.
I am on vacation in late November and I am going to see if I can fit in a trip to the facility and an area hospital to get a feel for the potential in my moving forward or dismissing this as a near miss.
I hope everyone is well and apologize for the absence. I need to take time away from social media and know that my thoughts are with each and every person here. I just have to stick to my agenda for the moment before I can relax and determine a balance between social media and my other commitments.
hope my thought are readable/legible. I wrote this and was distracted by 2 very long phone calls. today.
Wishing everyone a great day and week ahead.
xoxoxo
Piper
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OK so as I write this, I finally sent a text to the HS guy and we have a tentative date for next weekend. Gosh.........now I am nervous.....
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I love hearing how everyone is doing.
Piper - The life changes you're making sound exciting. :-) I'm sure everything will work out. I'm assuming the "HS guy" is someone who will be interviewing you (?). If so, good luck with that interview. I hope the job is exactly what you're looking for.
Melp27 - Welcome back. :-) Glad they're catching the BC early for you. The tissue expanders are very firm, that's for sure. The first MX, my lymph nodes were taken. A tissue expander was put into place and filled completely. It was very uncomfortable at first, but everything loosened up eventually. The second MX, no lymph nodes were taken, and the feeling was completely different - for example, I had no discomfort at all with that TE. I hope you'll have no discomfort, too.
Lili - I hope you're fully recovered soon!
Hi, Jazzy and June. Enerva and Milky - I hope you're both doing well.
I've been assuming that Bdavis found another boyfriend - maybe she's found "The One" now.
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Life not exciting in the least. Still in the planning stages of taking a few different directions. The HS guy is someone who lived out-of-state and has recently moved back to my town. We had met up in a group a couple of times over the last 1 1/2 years. We have decided to meet over the weekend for dinner and a movie. He has offered to cook and all. We shall see.
Hi Junie, Jazz, enerva, BB, Lilli, melp and anyyone else ( my brain is fried)
I am not going back to read what I wrote here yesterday. LOL.
I spoke to my cousin for 2 1/2 hours, then my male BFF for almost 1+ hour. Then I sent a guy from HS a text and that went on for a while......
I had written yesterdays post in between all the other stuff. Hit send and realized I should have erased and rewritten the whole thing.
Anywho....
Lili hope today is much better than the last and healing is going more smoothly.
Melp-truly sorry to hear about this new Dx. Many warm hugs as you push through this maze again.
I missed the post BB may be moving?
I am still excited about going to the Jazz Fest and my cousin is really thrilled I can go too. We will consider cruises in another year. Really not enough time to plan for the European excursion.
I submitted the initial/rough draft of my project this afternoon. I am feeling slightly better. But I now have to wait for my mentor to review it and advise for any needed changes. When that is complete it gets submitted throughout the management team for approval. What a process this is. In the meantime, while waiting for approval, I will have time to put the actual outline together for the program and devise a companion guideline for existing staff and volunteers.
A lot of work for not much compensation. Which is why I back away from projects because you get a raise for a year and have to do it all again to continue in the advancement program. It isn't really advancing. Just acquiring and disseminating information. Maybe a program like my will have greater benefits and I can continue it as a phase 2 project. If I am still around here.
I always say that though and do not go anywhere.
haha
I do have to lay down for a bit. Working tonight, off tomorrow then back to daylight for 2 days and an all day conference on Friday. My schedule is killing me.
Have a wonderful mundane Monday
xoxoxoxoxoxoxo
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hi, I am sorry I need to go back and tread pages I am behind, lots happening. I will post soon
Just wanted to say I am thinking of all of you.
Happy thanks giving!!!
I am ok just crazy busy but promise I ll update soon after I read the post.
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sand - ooh...the date sounds like fun. who knows, and it's always fun to hang out with some old friends. unlike online dating, you know he's not a catfish...
i was a little upset last night, sis called and told me my ex reached out to her and asked her how i've been doing. i was bit upset. and thought about all the stuff we went thru. i wanted to pick up the phone and call him to cuss him out, wanted to drop lots of F bombs on him.
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BB - we went thru a lot together. and i have put up with a lot of BS from him. though i do think he truly cares and wants to know but i do not want to have anything to do with him right now. he's just too f**ked up.
i am not gonna lie, on the weekends, when i am not busy i think about him a lot.
how are you??
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Piper - Oh, I see now. An old friend from high school? That's great. Enjoy the date! :-)
Enerva - Looking forward to hearing about how things are going for you these days.
June - Good for you in being cautious with your ex.
BB, Jazzy, Milky (wherever you are), and EVERYONE - Have a good night. :-)
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