patty
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Thank you so much, Madelyn.
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Patty,
Happy first Birthday in Heaven.
I hope the angels are singing to you.
Love you,
Madelyn0 -
thank you so very much mominator . Still think of her everyday. ~M~
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Thank You Mominator.
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From Patty’s Facebook friend:
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I just realized who this is. Oh my, tomorrow I will have names and stories. Wow bcg Patty loved you================================
Hello fellow BC friends. I too am a survivor. Patty had a rough couple days before she passed. I was so thankful to be at her side and help walk her home. She loved BCO. When flowers and cards came, I would read them to her. But my brain did not realize you were her fellow warriors.
Hootie Hoo Jwoo, beautiful flowers and cards, C aka vampeyes, S aka feeling feline, Ruth Ruthbru, Madelyn aka Mominator, Snickersmom, J Minus-Two, P from C, Dear Life, K. She loved each of you. She wrote an obituary but in the end a family member choose not to have it published. Patty found a website about cremation art. (I know, a little far out there) She wanted me to do this. I found a painter who is going to paint a beach scene using Patty’s ashes into the sand. I wanted you all to know that. Thank you all for loving her. She fought a very tough long battle, you all gave her strength. God bless each of you❤️
More from Patty’s Facebook friend:
The cards and you, her sisters, meant a lot to her. Thank you!
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Although many of us know each other's given names, I took out personal information per bco guidelines.
(Edited to add the More section)
(Edited to add the "I just realized" section
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Thank you again Mominator, it very is good to know Patty had such a good friend at her side.
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thank you for sharing that with everyone. It’s as if we come here because this is where she was. Always loving her. Always to be remembered......much love ~M~
Fascinating about the beach scene.
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Thank you, Mominator for updating us. Miss our Hootie Hoo.
I agree with you, Micmel - can't decide if I like the sand idea or not. My mom wanted us to shoot her ashes out of a big firecracker. We didn't do it but we did consider it. I think it would have been great to stand in a field somewhere with the grandchildren and great=grandchildren and set it off. They would have loved that.
Thanks again, Madelyn.
An
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that actually sounds like a celebration. Thanks for the smile.
Patty~My sweetheart, thanks for the memories and just being lucky enough to have had the pleasure of conversing with you quite frequently. My love for you will never fade. Make a place for us all, when it’s our time we can picnic under a tree. Hop in the Chevy with Chevy boy, Jwooand the gang. And drive. And drive and drive and smile. Because there will be no more pain. With such love for Patty! ~M~
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Thanks for letting us know. Glad she was there and read our cards to her.
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That is so sweet. And hearing that she was surrounded with love on her way is so great to hear.
I will be grieving with all of you for Patty for a very long time. And also celebrating her.
I love the painting idea. I think it is so important to honor what a person wants to do with their remains, and that seems perfect for Patty. I am sad they didn't publish her obit, as she clearly took the time to write it with care.
It's so hard to lose a sister here, because many times, there is no closure for us. Thank you again Momniator, for being our link to her.
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More exchange with the Facebook friend:
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Could we see the obituary that Patty wrote? Was there a funeral or memorial service?
There was never one (obit) posted. A disagreement between her X and I
Patty did specifcly tell me she did not want a service or funeral. She was cremated. I will get some ashes. Patty asked me to find a painter and do a picture using her ashes. We are just waiting on ashes.================================
(I also added a little bit more to my previous post. I wanted to keep all the messages from the Facebook friend in order.)
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Thank you, Mominator.
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💔 thank you for letting us know. I'm sure a lot of us were searching for one. You're a sweet woman mominator. What a shame. I hope None of that spills over to the boys. 😞 ~M~
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Hi all, I've never posted to this thread, but follow it religiously. I didn't know Patty at all, but was still greatly saddened by her passing...her posts were inspiring as is the love that is so deep in this thread.
When I saw the cremation art mentioned I was curious, so I did a google search and found something I thought you'd all like to see...so fitting....
It's cremation ash infused in glass memorial plate...as beautiful as her spirit. My condolences to all her wonderful friends here.
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That's beautiful, Egads. My MIL just passed and my DH wasn't sure what to do with her ashes. I'll Google it and show him.
Love and peace to all you lovely ladies grieving at this time. So sad for your losses..
Vickki
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Egads: that would suit Patty so well, I think, though that should not be construed as a suggestion to the family! ( I can just hear the 'hootie-hoo!)
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Thank you, Mominater, for keeping us in the loop. Much love to you all.
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I think if Patty wrote het obit, she wanted it shared. It's the final piece of her. If Xdh, emphasis on the x, didn't post it regardless of her wishes, then that's unacceptable. I can't imagine taking the time to write it and not want it shared. It's how you want to be remembered after all. But I didn't know Patty. Maybe the paper got passed around to loved ones. Just seems odd to me, esp if you are grieving a loved one, you'd want people to know what a wonderful lady she was, and she has 2 young boys.
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I didn’t know Patty either. My heart goes out to her boys. As far as we know, she did not see them after she went into Hospice full time. When she passes there is no memorial service or obituary...no closure.
Where are her sisters in this process? XH and friend have no legal bearing to make decisions for Patty. If Patty didn’t want a service perhaps she could have been counseled by a pastor to understand that the service is for the living not for the deceased loved one.
I am not always on the best of terms with my sisters but I can’t imagine not having an obituary printed and some kind of service acknowledging their life, otherwise it’s like they didn’t matter or they didn’t exist. The memorial/funeral service is the beginning of the healing process.
Patty has a lot of people who love her and they have been deprived of properly grieving her.
We need to pray for her sons. They have no say in this and will suffer for a long time.
🙏 for your sons Patty
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Bella, I so agree with you. I wish Patty's life had been celebrated and the that hope she had in eternal life due to her Christian faith was publicly avowed, particularly for the sake of her sons. It really ticks me off that her one wish-to have her obituary published-was not granted. As you say, it's as though her life and death had no particular significance. I wonder if whoever holds that obituary would allow it to be shared here. Prayers that her sons will find ways to express their grief and to celebrate her life.
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I meant to post this earlier, it's called Go'en Home.. I followed Patty's journey and I post this in remembrance. My wife's last PET scan, a few weeks back, showed her free of all cancer. She was TNBC that had changed from ER/PR+ to TNBC with extensive spinal and hip mets to the bone. Halaven worked for her.
This is for Patty:
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Lovely, thank you for sharing💜.
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Mike - that is beautiful. Thanks
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Really glad to hear good news of your wife's health Mike. Beautiful illustration for Patty.
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Hello Mike,
Thanks for the lovely tribute to Patty.
It that picture your own creation (vs one that has a copyright)? If so, I could post on Patty's Facebook page as a tribute to her "From her friends on BCO" if you'd like.
Also, I'm so happy to hear your wife's good news. Many blessings to you both.
Thank you.
Madelyn
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Mominator. It is my own creation but from a photo. No, please don't post. When I went to art school you could draw or paint just about anything as long as it was different in some way from the original. Not so now. If it even resembles the original photo or art you can be sued.
I have, within the last 9 months, developed Intent Hand Tremors so I can't draw anymore. Oh well, God gives and God takes away.
MikeW.
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Love you Patty
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Thanks for the drawing Mike. It's lovely.
I'm still trying to process Patty's passing.
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Yeah.... still cannot believe it’s even really happened...... good woman Mominator, you are. 0
