My Husband, My Life, My Love, My Family, My Cancer

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  • sunshine99
    sunshine99 Member Posts: 2,723

    mara, the "creepy shed" does sound, indeed, creepy. I picture it as damp, dark, and cob-webby with a dirt floor. Are "loonies" Canadian dollars?

  • sadiesservant
    sadiesservant Member Posts: 1,875

    😊 Yes, loonies are our one dollar coins (they have a loon on them). We call out two dollar coins toonies (or should that be twoonies LOL).

  • mara51506
    mara51506 Member Posts: 6,564

    Yes, we lost 1 and 2 dollar bills first. We have these as loonies and toonies. Rest of the bills are made of a strong material so it last longer, almost plastic. I was able to go to my bank and swap out some cash 20 loonies. Should last a couple of weeks, 2 loads, that is it. We also no longer have pennies, if you pay cash and the change would include pennies, usually rounds up to nearest nickel.

    It was a warm walk, for the first time this year, turned red which is fine. I do that quite frequently. Was a little tiring but I feel good now, have to strip rest of bed to put in bigger washer/dryer. 6 dollars for the whole bed is less money than another laundromat so pretty easy. Clothes and such are still done here though. I am happy, I thought that the two machines were taken away. Not sure how many of us would still be using them though.

  • sondraf
    sondraf Member Posts: 1,701

    Elderberry - its sort of a nice perk, but honestly it takes a good 4 or 5 hours to get anywhere door to door, so we really dont do long weekend all that often. There are times where I swear it would be faster for us to fly from the US to visit partners family in Sweden than it takes for us to get there from the UK, and we only live about 25 minutes from Heathrow! I dont think it matters where you are now, anything short haul of less than three hours is a mega hassle.

  • mara51506
    mara51506 Member Posts: 6,564

    Not too much today, getting set to do the rest of the bedding in the shed to wash, was too tired and fell asleep most of the afternoon and evening after my walk yesterday. That is OK, going out today as well, sidewalks are perfect. Might do 1/2 hour walks, one is good to me, more than one would be a bonus. We will see how I feel today. I did go to bed before 930 pm so I slept very well. Breakfast will be the usual suspects, beans, spinach ground, beeflesss ground etc. Nothing you guys have not heard before.

    I have to better organize my day so I include time for surveys, mobile games and such. I don't need much extra per month for my budget that I set but sometimes I forget about doing easy things online. Other than that, nothing else is happening. My bedding is almost done, just the dryer cycle. Much easier than in my bathtub and cheaper than conventional laundromats. After that, can make the bed and probably do the bedding every couple of weeks with a weekly steam, keep bed made so the top sheet is the only one collecting dust and fur. I like this system. The shed feels less creepy too.

    I hope that everyone has a decent day and in pockets for scans or just in case you need me.

  • kittykat9876
    kittykat9876 Member Posts: 420

    Hello everyone, I'm still waiting to start chemo, I see Sanju on Thursday so fingers crossed, I've been trying to distract myself, I've not looked at any test results, I didn't want to know about anything I couldn't do anything about. Apart from recovering from the surgery I've felt pretty good, that's probably all going to change soon so I've been enjoying it while I can, I even won $400 at bingo. I hope you're all doing as well as can be expected, take care everyone ❤️

  • mara51506
    mara51506 Member Posts: 6,564

    Kitty, so glad you won at bingo. I would be excited too. In your pocket for results and the start of you chemo, I'll bring anything you want and need in there.

  • mara51506
    mara51506 Member Posts: 6,564

    Bedding is done, bumped into a neighbour in the creepy laundry room when picking up laundry. She gave me a tip with the dryer that I could extend the dry cycle by adding a quarter if it does not cool down. May try that in a couple weeks when doing bedding.

    I did happen to notice one of the resident's garbage pail was co-opted by the workers here. I am planning to clear that up and assuming I can find the lid, put it in the little wooden container where they are kept, just leave a note for them that I did this. If I cannot lift all the bags, I will store them in the back door bin and bring one at a time. Property managers will not do this and not a good idea to leave garbage around. If I have to do it, I will. Might do it after my walk today, we will see.


  • elderberry
    elderberry Member Posts: 1,068

    Dear Sweet Sisters: It is with great sadness I am posting to let you know Pots (Ann) passed away on Friday at VGH. She had sent me an email not long before saying she was in hospital and would like me to visit.

    Her last line was " I understand if you can't, being here makes things very real. For me too. I'm not dying btw, not yet!!! "

    I knew she was struggling and had hoped she had a few miles left on her rubber. Still - I am shocked. I wish instead of saying I am good to visit any day but Wednesday morning I had said "I am going to miss you. I met you through this hideous disease but I know we could have become very good friends if we had had the time"

    We used to meet for coffees at cafes/bakeries and then at her home. I would bring the spectacular croissants from Chez Christophe, she'd make the coffee. We talked about life and how MBC is such a thief. She was still hoping the last time I saw her to go down to her basement studio and work on her clay flowers. She created beautiful flower gardens in the front and the back of her house that I envied. I loaned her my dress form so she and her DH could have an early 50th wedding anniversary since she knew she would not live to make it to that date. She used it to display her wedding dress and veil. Her closest friends and family attended. It sounded like it was a lovely time for her.

    She lurked often but stopped posting as her condition worsened. We emailed and met.

    It was Pots that got me to go to the Cactus Club for a meet-up, Nov 2019. Moth was there, as was Marianelizabeth. They are all gone now.

    So sad. And angry. So angry.


    (Edited by Mods to remove member's last name from the post. We strongly recommend not posting personal information on a public forum, for your own privacy and security.)

  • micmel
    micmel Member Posts: 10,060

    omg. Not another beautiful soul. I'm spinning with all of this loss. She posted here a lot when she was stronger I was worried when you don't see a name anymore. I'm so sorry for your loss elderberry. I hate cancer so very much I can't even begin to form words.

  • illimae
    illimae Member Posts: 5,745

    Awful news about Pots but I appreciate you letting us know. Missed her around here lately.

  • elderberry
    elderberry Member Posts: 1,068

    Thank you, Mel. There just seems to be so many in such a short time.

  • cookie54
    cookie54 Member Posts: 873

    Sounds like Pots was a gem of a friend. I am very sorry for your loss of a beautiful soul. We all understand your anger, it's so hard not to feel anger when so many wonderful lives are cut short. Hugs.

  • candy-678
    candy-678 Member Posts: 4,176

    Rest in Peace, Pots.

  • moderators
    moderators Posts: 8,741

    Thank you for sharing the news with us, Elderberry. Like others have said: it is especially hard given the recent losses in our community. If you would like additional support and can make it, we do have our virtual meet-up groups. Sometimes it can be nice to be among others when processing grief.

    You can register here: https://www.breastcancer.org/community/virtual-meetups#section-do-you-have-metastatic-breast-cancer-mbc-also-called-stage-iv

    We're here for you.

    Sincerely,
    The Mods

  • sadiesservant
    sadiesservant Member Posts: 1,875

    Elderberry, thank you for letting us know. I am gutted as I reached out to Ann just over a week ago - I had been worrying since she hadn’t posted in some time. I knew she was dealing with some challenges but felt the Tamoxifen was holding things steady. I really hoped that was the case.

    We’ve lost so many lately and it seems to be ladies I have been close to on these boards. God I hate this disease…

  • micmel
    micmel Member Posts: 10,060

    that's why we need to grab on to each other for as long as we can. I am hoping her sister is doing ok,she posted here as well from time to time. They go and we never hear from them again , Friendship is a gift. As all you ladies are. I'm so sorry for all the recent losses. 50's girl has my heart tied up. I loved reading her peaceful posts. She sent me fabric beautiful types when I was making my masks and I sent her some of I hope her husband is ok she was beautiful as were bap susan and now pots. Fly angels no more pain. No more.

  • micmel
    micmel Member Posts: 10,060

    totally agree with cookie. It’s hard not to be angry. Real hard.

  • mara51506
    mara51506 Member Posts: 6,564

    I am very sorry to hear about Pots. My condolences to her family, friends and everyone here as well.

  • kittykat9876
    kittykat9876 Member Posts: 420

    I'm sorry to hear about pots as well as Susan and the others we've lost recently, this disease robs us of so much, not the least is time to spend with the ones we love.

  • tanya_djamila
    tanya_djamila Member Posts: 1,542

    Good evening ladies

    Sorry to hear about Pots. Thanks for letting us know. I met one of the ladies Laurie-boo-boo a few times and we talked like we knew each other forever. We need a group hug ladies-lots of loss.

    Tany

  • goldensrbest
    goldensrbest Member Posts: 737

    I hate these losses. So many. I’m on a FB MBC group - there have been many losses there as well all of a sudden. Family and friends left to grieve. Then I stop and think about all the other cancer patients out there. Too, too many. Heartbreaking😭😭😭😭.
    My shoulder MRI is today. While I sure don’t want bone Mets in a new location, I would sure like to know why there are fractures w/o trauma and pain. Both the Ortho onc and radiation onc said they would call to go over the results


  • mara51506
    mara51506 Member Posts: 6,564

    I feel the same sadness for all the loss we have seen here but I also am trying to give my own self hope for all the longterm people here as well. That keeps me from getting too depressive about this disease. That does not minimize our feelings of sadness with each loss though. All of our lost sisters are flying free now.

    Goldens, in your pocket for your MRI.

    Not much on the agenda for today, not unusual. Laundry, in house this time, creepy shed not needed. Walks inside and one outside. Only thing that is unusual is that I will go outside with gloves and clean out a neighbours garbage can that workers filled with garbage. Don't want overflowing garbage. Will take some bags out, empty it and put it back in the shed, leave them a note I put it back where it belongs. Benefits me that garbage is not attracting animals as well. Not doing for them so much as for me.

  • elderberry
    elderberry Member Posts: 1,068

    Thank you, all of you, who have expressed their sympathy about Pots.

    PLEASE - long time MBC'ers, NEAD, please please let us know that you have not vanished but just aren't posting.

    Mara: yes, there are lot of us NEAD, "nearly NEAD", once NEAD but still stable....we need to remember that some of us don't leave so quickly.

    Group Hug

    image


  • micmel
    micmel Member Posts: 10,060

    adorable elderberry! Well said. I’m an nead checking in! Love to all BooBoo (I’m getting ready to text).

  • candy-678
    candy-678 Member Posts: 4,176

    I got a text from Mel. She was checking on me. Thank you Mel. I did post a couple of weeks ago, after my MO and scans. I am still here. I read every day. But I just do not post as much as I used to. Yes, we need to check in to let the group know we are ok. And Mel knows my cell number so we can keep in touch. I think each of us on here need a "real life" connection so someone can post updates for each other if we cannot. I think of sisters here that I have not seen post in a while and always wonder if they are still alive or not.

  • sunshine99
    sunshine99 Member Posts: 2,723

    It's nice to know that even if we don't post, it shows under our name the date of our latest activity. At least I think it shows even if we don't post. I should try to not post for a day and see what happens. I always appreciate the updates about other members, even when the news is sad.

    Carol

  • elderberry
    elderberry Member Posts: 1,068

    pots was always reading. She let me know that folks on the board had posted "heard anything from Elderberry?"

    She did think of you and was always happy to read positive news and felt sorrow over the mounting losses.

    I talked to Pots' husband and asked him if I could let the ladies on the threads know. I think he was relieved not to have to be the one. He has enough on his plate.


  • livingivlife
    livingivlife Member Posts: 454

    Elderberry- thank you for letting us know about Pots. You were a good friend. I am sorry to hear of another loss.

    All these deaths in such a short period of time. There are no words to describe what this disease has done. It just plainly sucks.

  • sf-cakes
    sf-cakes Member Posts: 621

    Thank you Elderberry for letting us know. As hard as it is to hear about the loss of another wonderful person, I would rather know than not.

    Love and prayers and candles lit for all we've loved and lost. ❤️🕯