My Husband, My Life, My Love, My Family, My Cancer
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Mae~ I knew you would be already close to that step goal. I enjoyed my lawn mowing, even though I am a little sore at the moment. I'll give you an example. Little but, huge in my book. I just recently tooK some of my inheritance to recarpet the entire house, a huge project and extremely expensive, during my heaviest chemo time period. The rule was no shoes on the carpet. So my DH installed a shoe rack In The garage for everyone to put their shoes on. It's not a long walk to the rack. You would think it was located in Montana. I just can't get my son to put the shoes there. You hit the nail on the head, he doesn't like to do things on his own. I AM truly terrified that he will become like his real father, whom at age 48 is still living in his mothers basement, has no ability to substain any relationship whatsoever. That is why I am trying to break him now. My DD is working full time and has her own started up catering business. She works at on the side. Although, I call her my princess without a country, she is at least a little more motivated. For someone who isn't a parent. You sure did hit some very truthful facts! So glad the clean up is over for you guys. Now let's hope Claudia is doing ok. I'm a worry wart!! Much love and thanks ~M~ I'm sure by the end of the day your steps will be close to 10k Go Mae~
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Micmel - We are in the hurry up and wait stage now. We're ready though. Dh and I were both brought up strictly, so we brought our ds up fairly strict. He had chores and if they weren't done, there were consequences. Education was very important to us. He went to private schools, and college wasn't a choice, it was mandatory. I'll never forget when he got his first paycheck and wanted to know who the he'll was fica and where did they get off taking his hard earned money! We laughed so hard! He was expected to maintain good grades, do his chores and obey his curfew...infractions brought on consequences. It sounds harsh, but we had many fun times together as a family and when he went off to college, I was lost. He and I spent most Saturdays together running errands and cleaning house, with the stereo cranked up, singing and dancing! I miss those days! When he came home from college for Thanksgiving and begged us to come home, it broke my heart to say no. We did tell him, if he still wanted to at the end of the year, he could. By then, he was enjoying his independence! He was astonished by how many students did not know how to do their laundry or cook. He thanked me for teaching him.
I agree with Bob. Give them a time frame, and then go do what's best for you and dh.
Mae, you rock!
Keetmom, precious girls! Glad all is well!
Chicagoan, I love my bc yoga class! Ask them about yoga nidra. It helps relax your mind and body!
Lynne, glad you are doing well. There has been lots of good news this week!
Nan, Thinking of you always!
Hugs and prayers everyone
Claudia
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Claudia~so glad to see you here. I know that the storm is starting to heat up and make land soon. I've been following the news and hoping that it just fizzles out, since been over so much land already. Geeze go away.
I wasn't very strict with my kids I'll admit it. But I didn't allow them to disrespect people or anyone. I've taught them to work hard. They have held jobs since they have been 16 and never have been without one. They worked at their first jobs for four years straight, did really well. I know they know what to do. I think it goes back to what Mae said. They don't want o do things for themselves. It's just easier. They have chores. It's like a big deal to get them to do it on the day they know it's supposed to be done. In their minds. Oh. It's going to get done! No big deal... I'm negative! Since my diagnosis my kids have told me I am negative, I try to explain to them , that I have become more honest with my feelings, not negativeness. I'm just not taking any shit!! I am done powdering asses! It's time to grow up little birds!!!
The other thing that takes up a lot of time and energy is the dogs. I am the one who always is with them taking care of them, my biggest dog is 95 lbs....the little one, is 65 lbs. keeping them in line is becoming a lot of work. He's a hound dog and he wants to hunt, he needs a job. I'm going to be checking on you and I am sending good vibes and thoughts always. Much love ~M~
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Good morning! I can't believe that it Is 48 here waking up. We had a cool summer this year. I actually was chilly, who am I?? I am always hot from these heat flashes. Effexor has helped. I am concerned about the weaning off portion though. I don't like withdrawal issues of any kind. The relief of twenty heat flashes a day seems to make it worth it for me. I know Claudia takes and It really helps her.....I Am sending good vibes to you all in Florida. My best friends home and business Is on the keys. He is freaking out. I fear for all of his possessions and his lively hood. Damn storm.
I am going to venture Into the basement. To continue our cleaning feat!! I feel like since diagnosis I have been feeling like I am nesting, keeping important things and anything that isn't goes. Ba. Bye!! The rule is. You want it for your kids, then box it up , if you haven't used it in a complete year. You're not going to use it. All the seasons have passed. My daughter has more clothing than a Marshalls!! I just have this fear of something happening to me and my sweet DH, would have to be alone sorting through everything we have in this house. I could not bear for that to happen. Dealing with the loss would be enough way enough. Closets are done, all my things are sorted, And the basement is the last thing to tackle. And ugh! So much shit accumulated and I don't know where it even came from. My son has a car parts factory down there and I'm sick of shit just lying around. I wake up this morning and there low and behold, my sons shoes are NOT on the freaking shoe rack. I gotta say. AHHHHHHHHH GET A FREAKING CLUE!! maybe I should hide them!! Or send him directions through google map to the shoe rack in the garage!! 😡
Claudia ~ much love and thoughts for safely riding this thing out. Hugs my friend.
Have a good Sunday everyone.
Chicago
Mae
Lynn
Keetmom
Nan
Nkb
Much love to all!
~M~
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I'm doing well, I'm fueled up with coffee and breakfast and ready for the day. Today I need to get an oil change, do some light housekeeping and prepare for Sunday night dinner and TV with friends. I have two couples come over every Sunday, tonight I'm making crunchy onion chicken with mashed potatoes and corn and we just finished Game of Thrones, now on to American Horror Story, then the Walking Dead. We've been doing the Sunday night thing for many years (it all started with the show 24) and it keeps me normal and feeds my friends who either don't cook or are too broke to make good meals.
Hope all is well with you ladies and hoping for the best for everyone in Irma's path.
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Oh ladies how I have needed to read all your stories and tales of love and life. I've been feeling washed up on the shore since hearing of progression a few weeks ago. I seemed to cope with my first mets DX but this felt like a massive slap in the face and that rug being wrenched away from once my steady feet. Now reading through this thread I feel the warmth and reality of life and I must say though life is hard you have shown me it's good to be real and honest. I have a wonderful DH, who though is an engineer and always wanting to fix things, is learning to be softer and to cope with our situation. My two lovely sons have just gone off to college. My 20 year old is a returning junior at UDUB Seattle my 18 year old is a freashman in Boston. Empty nesters at last! I'm really enjoying their new life and adventures, so proud to have such independent yet home loving boys. But, how it breaks my heart to think of not being here for them and their Dad. We text all the time either individually or in our family group so our empty nest doesn't feel too quiet. So DH and I are throwing ourselves into a pool refurb and landscaping project and I am trying not to get obsessed with feeling I'm not going to be here to see it finish let alone to enjoy the results. Though tears have come from reading your stories I wanted to let you know it's given me stength to face ano day.
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Scwilly~ Hi darling! Welcome to our thread! We have such affection and strength that we share here for each other. We like to call it our little pub. I hope you'll become a part of it and share whatever family thoughts or feeling or issues you may have. I am so sorry to hear of your progression. I am going to add you to my good vibes and thoughts of strength. It is such a hard thing to deal with. Inside it just tears me up that so many good women suffer with this crap. I hope you know that love you and your DH have Is so special and kind. My DH Is also the gruff mister mcgruff. He has also softened and has become more tolerant and kind. I don't think I could live without his love and strength. I am truly in awe of him even after 14 years. The love of my life. My kids are driving me to drink currently! Arggggg. Empty nest kinda sounds good for me right now! Welcome to our thread. I hope you'll become a part of our little family and let us help you through some days. Like they have for me. Big hugs to you darling. I love the fact that you have also found your person! It makes the world go around. Love does. It's the reason we fight this crappie disease. Oh and you will be around for a long time honey. It's like whack a mole. You keep whacking !! Lean on us!
Mae~. Omg. I am now watching Game of Thrones!! I am on season five episode four. I am hooked beyond hooked. When I started people used to tell me, "don't like any character". Ugh! They were correct. But my favorite Jon Snow. Awesome character. Rugged and very good actor. I can't get enough. The sexscenes are certainly flowing. I have to say I have to gasp at how skinny these women are. This being said from someone who has one boob and feels like the holiday ham lately! I have also watched every season of American Horror!! Love them very much also. I think your Sunday friends visits are so healthy!! I try to see my bgf every month. I find it therapeutic to just have that girlfriend laughter from way before I ever even uttered the word cancer. Have a blast. Sounds like a great meal too. What time should I arrive.?? 😍
Claudia. Thinking of you and love you lots. Be safe my friend. Sending thoughts and good vibes your way.
Much love to all ~M~
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Thank you for your heartfelt welcome M, and being English I love a good Pub!
DH and I have just last weekend finished Game of Thrones. We only started this summer, binge watching 1-3 episodes a week, and boy do we miss it. Enjoy - it's a fabulous series with such great storylines, script and talent from those actors. It's a little bit 'flighty' and full of nudes but so worth watching in my opinion. We are now on the lookout for a new series just watched episode 1 of Westworld and I'm not convinced it's for me yet.
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I am totally enjoying the series. I don't want to watch too many though, then it would be over !!! Have you ever heard of shameless? It's a showtime original. Fabulous show. It's about a family whose parents are in no way parents and they go through so much problems and crazy stuff. It's a great show. I was hooked also and binged watched that before Game of thrones!! Also, breaking bad!! Great series as well. The only thing that for me with that one, was the main character had lung cancer In the show! But the way the show highlighted the reason behind what He does is jaw dropping. Once again scwilly, welcome to my little slice of home. Anything can be said. Any feeling is important. I wanted this thread to be supportive, a real life. Other than always discussingside effects or cancer cancer cancer. We know it messes with us, but we can build strong friendships and community here. While we actually live life here too. The good part of life. Big hugs! ~M~
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Good afternoon everyone! Welcome scwilly! Pull up a chair. MBC is like a crazy roller coaster ride! But it's doable! Congrats on your boys, you must be so proud! Your projects sound like fun, and of course you will see them finished! So far this year, we have put in a swimming pool and deck. We have started construction on a shop/ barn. Nobody is going to stop me from seeing them completed! We also are adding a roof over our back deck and screening it all in! Dh is doing all work in between his jobs, so it's taking awhile, but I will see it done! Also, try the last ship, we are hooked!
Micmel, I would hide them, then when you finally give them back, tell him next time they go in the trash. That will teach him. You will only have to do it once, oh and you do not replace them. That is on him. I think we might need a bigger table in our pub! Ain't it grand!
Mae - Your dinner sounds great! I would like to be there also, unfortunately, our raft doesn't have a motor, so it would take me a week to there! Enjoy!
We are still waiting for that stupid hurricane to show up. Once we lose power, we will lose WiFi too. Don't worry, we will be fine. Sending lots of love, hugs and prayers to everyone!
Claudia
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I love Shameless! I also recommend Preacher on AMC. Dinner is served at 7 pm
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I'll be there! Lol it might take me a week. But I'll do it. Lol. Enjoy your dinner. Claudia. Be safe. Love you guys a ton. Shameless is awesome as well !! We like the same shows it seems. I brought out some brand new stools. As many as needed !! Hugs to everyone happy Sunday. My thoughts are with the storm and hoping it just goes away!! Much love ~M~
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That is how I felt in my basement. Holy Hannah. None of the crap is mine. I listened to music, I have been too sad since diagnosis. I figure I'm taking these three months and making good use of them. It's like a ticket for three months to actually live My life. Since I don't have to report to the hospital or oncologist until mid November! No blood work, nothing I have to say I am thrilled about that. That alone is a gift. But of course he will want a scan then. Yuck! But I feel great. No pain. None at all. Today I even danced a little with DD in the basement. It was fun, we laughed and sang. I was lifting boxes and moving things. I am achey but that's about it, I know that my stamina has gone down but IHaven't felt like that In a long time. Cancer. We aren't going down without a big ole fight!! Hugs and much love ~M~0 -
We have had tv on watching the hurricane all weekend...SO worried about the Keys, we visited this past Jan and really enjoyed it. Now watching the Packer game...
Scan on Wed and results on Thursday, feeling pretty good, but still a bit concerned,
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Keetmom~ hi darling! I enjoy football also! But my team always stresses me out lol they never really win anything at all. But I try to be a loyal fan. I do like the packers as well. Always have. My mother has hammered that into me. Now to the important topic. Your scan. Imagine all of us standing next to you when you're going into the scan. Imagine us all making faces at you and sending all the strength possible, and good thoughts and vibes I can send!!! I understand completely how you're feeling and I'm sorry sweetheart , I'm sorry that any of us go through this. I have learned from my body , that if I feel good, my bloodwork and scan usually show that same pattern. I am hoping to hope that we all have good scans! I'll be thinking of you! As always. Hug Emma and Dapheny! For me please ! Hugs to you too! Enjoy the game! First week of school in the books already.
Scwilly~ I am sending you thoughts as well, I know you had some progression, but let's focus on the next line to knock it back and keep you stable again. That's my honest wish for you! Sending you hugs and I'll be adding you to my good thoughts list! Again... welcome.
Much love all.
Claudia. Thinking of you all and the storm. Waiting till it's over with you. Hugs friend.
Mae~ never heard of preacher! Duly noted! I have a feeling I will like it,since we have so far liked everything the same. Most people though if they have seen it, they like it. Game of thrones that is!! Awesome ! Jon Snow! Who was your favorite Mae? Anyone. Khalisee is beautiful!! Love her too! And Tyrian! Such a great actor. Gonna watch another real soon. Hooked ! Hugs Mae enjoy your time with your friends!
~M~
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Rootin' for you keetmom, scans are tough, even when you feel confident
Micmel, Preacher is in its 2nd season but hopefully you can find season one online or on cable, it's totally worth it. My GoT fav's are Tyrian, Daenerys and Aria. Also, glad to hear you've been feeling so good lately, I hate seeing so many of us in pain.
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This candle is for Lita. I am hoping you get relief from your pain and I hope you feel everyone's love from here! Thinking of you! ~M~ I am also posting it for Claudia just in case she doesn't have internet. She was way on board tonight with the candle lighting before this storm! Much love to all! Hugs ~M~0 -
Mae~I am going to look into it. I'll take your word and figure out where to find it. I didn't even want to try to butcher khalisees other name. Lol. The pronunciation gets me with a lot of those names. Like cerasi. She's the devil. But also an excellent actress and yes aurya. (Spelling geeze) i am also fond of Jamie Lanister and Sansa! I'm going to watch another episode right now. Have a great time tonight, you have lucky friends. Hugs and much love to all. ~M~ Oh and then there is little finger !! Oh I could go on and on. Sam..... Briean? The huge woman who can sword fight like a man!! Someone stop me. Lol.
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Geeze~ that storm looks like it really battered Florida, I am sending out vibes and good thoughts to our sister Claudia in hopes it wasn't as bad as they had said, like in the islands. That looks like total devastation! So scary for those people. I am also hoping my childhood best friends home and business was spared!
Here is hoping for good scan results, I know Keetmom has a scan on Wednesday, I am with you! In spirit and thoughts. And to nother week of trying to be pain free! Good results vibes going out to anyone who may need Them. Looks like some rain will be on tap, I'll take it, as long and it gets away from Florida and Texas! Enough!
I stayed up until midnight watching Game of thrones. Ugh! Now I am very tired! I have a palliative care doctors appointment today and then no appointments until mid November. I may need a nap after my venture out and to the pharmacy with my mountain of prescriptions that I will need filled, I often wonder what they must think when they fill all of these medicines for me! I counted that every day I take like 14 pills. I think that is way enough for me! I'm gong to speak to to her today and ask about the Effexor and what I need to know about it , doseages and what is or isn't good!
I hope everyone has a good morning! Thinking of all of you and sending hugs and good vibes! Much love ~M
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That's how I feel at the doctors offices and appointments! All done and back with my many many prescriptions in hand for the next three months. I really think that I feel like cattle waiting to go in the barn for my feed. Everyone packs in the place sees the doctor and then goes on about their lives, it's quite enormous the amount of people going into the cancer center! Much love to all ~M~0 -
Micmell, we are safe. Thank you for including me in your candle light for Lita. Please tell her I'm sorry. We have no power, limited internet access, so if you don't here from me for awhile, that's why. Our clean up is overwhelming at this point, but we will get it done. I found something as scary as mbc. Thank God it doesn't last as long! We have a lot to be thankful for!
Hugs and prayers everyone
Claudia
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Please pray for our state!
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Claudia~ I am so happy to see your name here. Been a quiet posting day. But all worth monitoring just to see you here. Thank goodness. I am sending all of my strength and good thoughts for Florida and each and every person dealing with this aftermath. I am just thankful you and your family are ok! Wrapping with you huge hugs. Much love my friend. One day at a time. I remember how scary Sandy was. Sounded like a freight train the wind did! Thank you so much for letting Us know you're alright. As alright as you can be, dealing with this. Be safe! Much love ~M~
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Claudia - thinking of you in Florida. I do hope your cleanup is not too arduous and you have managed to escape any big damage. My friends in Orlando managed to have only a little damage.
So today I have booked my son to come down next week from Seattle before his college starts the following week. So we will have a few extra days together. I was going to go for a quick trip but I really can't face travel until I have sort out these darn side effects. Today is a happy day!
Hugs to all!
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Good morning Scwilly~how awesome is that, that your DS is coming for a visit. I know how special that time to share is. I hope that you spend your time with him making many memories that you will cherish. There is nothing stronger than a families love and bond, even when they are being stinkers, like mine are now. My DS especially is giving me a run for my money. I am sorry to hear that you're struggling with side effects. This is hard enough, without having that constant reminder of annoying side effects. I hope that you can still do some things with your family. I know after my tough chemo. I didn't want to even go to the porch. I'll be thinking of you and sending good thoughts and happiness for your time together ! Big hugs ~M~
Mae~ was this preacher on a cable channel? Or did you mention AMC? How many seasons are there? I am going to check Hulu! Hope rads are still cooperating.! Thinking of you.
Chicago ~ you doing ok ? Hope the hiking is easier with this cooler weather coming in. I mowed my lawn the other day. The physical activity was very welcomed. Although my body was like. Okay lady. What the hell are you doing ? Hugs to you !
Keetmom~ good scan Wednesday, thinking of you. Hoping for great results my friend!! Hugs to the little ones..
Claudia~ thinking about you and everyone in Florida, we will be waiting for you, hope the cleanup goes smoothly and quickly. Hope your power is back really soon. Hugs my friend.
Nan~ big day Friday. Mama of the bride. So beautiful you are sweetheart, can't wait to hear about it all.
Lynn~ you doing ok also? Hope everything is ok with you and yours! Loving this cooler weather In the north east. Yesterday a little warm. But loved the cool weekend. Want more of those temps!! Hugs to you !
Didn't sleep too great last night. Dogs had to go out. Ugh! That is like a full time job in itself. Up and down. Walk. Click click of their nails on the floor. Drink water. Walk around some more, thump down on the floor when they. lay down. Jingle of collar,Whining for food at 7:00. I really would love it to sleep until 900 with these dogs. lol boy do I live in a dream world!! Much love to you all. 💕 ~M~
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Good morning to all! Hanging in there, busy week this week! Dentist appointment, XGEVA shot, 2 physical therapy appointments and appointment this morning to get new mastectomy bras and an new prosthesis. On Monday and Thursday I volunteer at a cat rescue so trying to squeeze it all in. Loving this cooler weather in Pennsylvania! Hope you all have a great day! I read everyday even if I don't post much.
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Claudia, I have been praying for everyone in Florida. I cannot imagine how difficult it is for people who have seen so much of there lives upended and their homes destroyed. Rebuilding will take time. Feeling completely safe again will likely take even longer. I am glad you are safe. That, of course, is the most important thing that everyone needs to remember. Lives cannot be replaced.
Micmel, i don't post here often, but I read your posts about your frustration with your children. Alas, that journey into adulthood can be so challenging to the parents! My children are all grown now. I do remember moments that might give you some hope that you are appreciated and are doing the right thing. When we dropped my oldest son at college, his new roommate's mother said she was taking her son downstairs to show him how to use the washer and dryer. My son gave me a shocked expression and later said he was glad I had prepared him for college and at least he knew how to wash his own clothes. I laughed, remembering how he had grumbled about doing his own laundry. When son number 2 came home from Christmas break during his freshman year, he thanked me for having rules and setting boundaries when he was growing up even though he didn't like them at the time. He said that his good foundation served him well as he saw others step over the line and get involved in things that were risky or just plain dumb. It was like a mother's best dream - my teenaged son thanked me for being that mean mom he had complained about for years! Don't get me wrong. My sons were not perfect, they were just normal adolescents, but it was good to know that my DH and I did some things right. So take heart. Things will click with your kids eventually. As I said, mine are all adults now and they are off on their own, but they step in to help when we need it.
Scwilly, Enjoy your time with your son.
Lynwood, I have a dentist appt this week, too. I love the way my teeth feel right after they have been cleaned. Is it weird to enjoy my time with my dental hygienist? She is great!
Nothing exciting planned for this week, I will do some babysitting for two of my granddaughters, ages 1 1/2 and 3, plan to do some sewing if my back can take it, and want to start cutting back some of the plants in my gardens.Fall has arrived.
I hope everyone has a good day.
Hugs, Lynne
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Lynn~ I agree with the weather. Loving that so much. Just woke up from a long long nap. As awake too late the past few nights. Now it's shower time. Ugh! I love that you volunteer with the animals, that's pretty darn awesome. I feel like dealing with my dogs every day, all day makes me exhausted in itself. How many days a week do you volunteer? I worry about all those precious animals, in Texas and in Florida. So sad for everyone, but the animals can't speak up or ask for food and water. They are helpless in all of this. When Harvey hit Texas, I saw photos of cattle just lying in the streets, many horses did not seem to make it. Makes me angry and sad. But who can you blame.? Just like our cancers? Who do you blame ??
Glad to see you and that all is well.!!
Lynne~ so nice to see you here again, I hope you will come join us, whenever you may want.... I enjoy the closeness we have built here. My kids. Ahhh yes. That challenging age they seem to be in. It's really frustrating, I'm waiting so patiently for the light bulb to go off. I keep trying and trying to teach them, I keep trying and trying to explain what the bigger picture looks like. Ever since my diagnosis, he's pulled back somewhat. I don't know if it's denial. But I adore him, it makes my heart hurt. But I can't solve everything that comes along even though I may want too. Thank you for sharing. It does help to know, that there will come a time when it will click. I just need it to be like now! My cancer has moved things along. At a faster pace then we ever imagined. It's like running a race. For independence!! Big hugs. To you. Hope to see you back here again! Big hugs ~M~
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oh and Lynne~ I am thrilled you spend time with your grandchildren, family is the reason I started this thread. The love of our families!! Please come back and tell us stories about them. I am hopeful I may get to see my grandchildren. !! That has become a bucket list item. Even though my kids don't know that. I would never pressure Them for that ever! I am happy that you'll be spending time with them, how exciting !! Hugs to them and you!! ~M~
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