My Husband, My Life, My Love, My Family, My Cancer
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Lynn it looks like a great day 😊 what a loving family. I know it is exhausting having the children and grandchildren around but I wouldn't have it any other way. Sunday we went to a local park and had a cook out, swam and played putt putt golf. We got there at 230 and didn't leave until 830. I had to open my school the next day and I was soooo tired. But I loved it!!!
grannax- great looking pirate family. They look like they are having such a great time!
minnie- congratulations on the scans!!!
muddlingthrough- congratulations on the walk! We have to take baby steps and be grateful for what we can do. It was very fitting that you found that clover 😊
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Grannax~ i am loving your pirates! It seems like you have an awful lot of fun with those little Cuties, good looking family. I hope someday I can see my own grand children's smiles to melt my heart. Thanks for sharing! Precious!!
Lynnwood~I love your pic! I had a hard time figuring out mine. Most times it said it was too large. I had no idea what it was doing. I finally got mine to work. Good job!
Minnie~ Hi darling. Welcome back you world traveler you! Congrats on your results of stability. 🍾🥂💙😙 that is really awesome when you hear shrinkage and I am thrilled for you and your family! Many more decades of that please !!
Lynne(Man)~wow those pics are awesome!!! I love the sunset. I love the minis all together. What an awesome idea!!! You and your DH look like you're enjoying a beautiful day together! I have never seen as many mini coopers together in one place like that. It really looks pretty darn neat!! How on earth did you not get exhausted? I am in awe of that! You go!!!! I man seriously always amazed at all you ladies do. Put me To shame honestly. Btw Lynne (Man) blue is your color!!😊
Today when I was napping, I woke up and looked at my phone and I had noticed my DS had called me three times in a row during his work day. So I immediately called back. The second he answered I knew something was wrong. He choked up his words and I could tell he was holding back tears. He said Mom, I found out today that yesterday that Alexus, (his x girlfriend from high school) was found murdered Monday morning at a Home in the woods with a lot of property. Apparently, whoever has done this beat her to death. She was 20 years old and just getting ready to turn 21. The police haven't released any other information and they are investigating further. Our town is devastated, this was a beautiful young tiny young woman. She was sweet, kind and just as pretty on the inside as the outside. Our community is just ripped apart and souls are forever ripped from this. I can tell he's very upset, he went right to his room and hasn't come out. Her mother. 💔🤯😭😦😶😩🤮 her poor family. I just can't believe that something like this has happened. I feel sick and sad and confused and am not looking forward to seeing my DS's entire graduation class mourning their beautiful classmate who couldn't hurt a fly. I just don't understand any of it. Shattered hearts in our community today. Oh someone help us and this hard life everyone seems to have to live lately. Peace please ?
Love to all you ladies. Tell those you love that tonight. Please. Much love ~M~
GP ~ my sweet friend travel
Safely. Love you too.. my hidden angel
You too Gracie
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Holmes~ you snuck in there beauty! Sounds like a Nice father’s day weekend. I love swimming. I miss feeling younger and more Alive. Plus I see as I age, there is so much sadness in this world, so hearing about putt putt is just what I need! Hugs to you!
Much love ~M~
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Oh my goodness Micme. Murdered?!!How does anyone handle that? Beyond horrible. Devastating. Praying for your DS and you.
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oh no!! What is this world coming to? I am so sorry your ds has to go through this. Hopefully they find the person that did it.
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Gracie M 2007
I'm so sorry that no one responded to you. I try to get a pen and paper and write down the names and something to remember you by when I read. I apologize and know how hurtful that can be. It happened to me once on here and I was sad and never mentioned it but continued to post and decided not to take it personally and then someone probably Micmel mentioned my name or something a few days later and it really meant the world at that time bc I was at a low point. So again I am truly sorry about your progression and feeling alone. You are in my prayers.
Tanya
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Micmel, sorry for your son and your shocked community. Sorry for a family torn with pain.
Gracie, sorry that your post went unreplied to. That walk down a hall to The Big Machines is ... I don't know the words to describe the feeling of being swallowed whole by the process and not knowing where it's going to spit you back out. I felt that wary, ready to kick and fight feeling every time the radiation machine was aimed at me. Even though the staff were very kind and professional, it's you, alone, like a skinned fish, laying on that table wondering what your life will look like when the results come back. It is an extremely isolating feeling. Out of body, almost. Everyone who hears the word scan or biopsy or test has that heart lurch of recognition and we wish to god we were not living this life. Like Muddlingthrough said, the trick is learning to live knowing what we know. I am sorry you felt unheard.
50sgirl, I still want to come have coffee with you, and Micmel and Grannax and ALL OF YOU! Hugz.
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Lynnwood1960 shopping is a crap shoot for me too and I don't like the way I look, waaay fat in all of those mirrors. I tried shopping online and sometimes the garments don't fit. I don't shop with my husband though maybe I should. Today I was at CVS and saw some wide legged pants but decided not to buy bc they probably weren't wiiiiide enough. I love the way Lynne and Micmel came to your rescue. I'm glad you found an outfit all that stress should be worth an outfit at least.
Mae hope you're doing well the 29th is around the corner!!!
Muddling welcome to the thread. it's a lot to read. Sometimes I can't keep up if I miss a few days. Sometimes I read and don't respond. It's nice to know everyone's here under the same MBC sentence.
Grannax a dog a cat and renovations you deserve a reward. I went glamour camping this weekend with family and friends. It was exhausting and energizing. Just being around my DH, DD, DS, brother, grandchildren and friends is a wonderful change and it forces me to do more. I did my share of cooking and sitting on the screened wraparound porch in a rocking chair too. This is our second year at Lake Louisa in Clermont FL.
Daywalker welcome to posting. Just sharing how you feel is therapeutic sometimes and you don't have to respond to all of us.
Divine I agree it speaks volumes that Gracie allowed us to have the opportunity to apologize and called us on our neglect of her in her time of need. I pray we do better and at least one of us will always respond. You're all in my prayers.
Thinking of you Big B.
Pics to follow
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After The weekend of fun I went to the neurological surgeon and have to have a biopsy and khyphoplasty some time in July.
Have a good evening all and thanks for letting me share.
Tanya
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Micmel, what a horrific tragedy!!! We always think that these things will never happen to anyone we know , but they unfortunately do. I’m sorry that such a young life was lost. Tanya, your pictures are gorgeous!! Keep us posted on your biopsy and khyphopladty. I changed my avatar again, the last one showed up very burry, no idea why. This one is one of my 3 rescue kitties.0
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Messed up! Hope it shows up now. Forgive me, I am very technologically challenged!0
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Micmel sorry for your sons loss of his x. That is a horrible story. So many young girls get brutalized. So sad and senseless
Tanya
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waving hello to Runor.... love you sweet friend. My DS is very upset. Don't know how to talk about this one to him. He is very upset and his friends came over to the house and we all sat around and talked about her. So damn sad. Makes me sick.
Tanya~ I am going to say it again. You have a very good looking family. I love how close you all are and how you all do so many things together. Alligators what???? Lol I'm a chicken. But would love to see one in nature. Grandsons are going to have the ladies swooning. Thanks for sharing the beauty of the sunsets. I don't think two Are ever the same! Hugs to you ! Sorry to hear about another biopsy. Haven't we all had enough??
I'm going to try to rest. The poorcommunity is shattered. I keep seeing her beautiful face when I close my eyes. So sad and so very young. Goodnight ladies. ~M~
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Lynnwood ~ I see an adorable little kitty cat!! So I am assuming it worked!! Hugs and gn ~M~
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Micmel, how awful. I have no words. I hope they get the brutal monster so no one else will be harmed.
Tanya, beautiful pictures!
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Hello muddling~ Thank you darling. I didn't really get too much sleep at all last night. I had some of my sons friends here and his BFF that Is a girl, whom I adore. Cried in my arms. She said. “She was my first friend when I moved here. And she just wailed.... my son and three other grown young men.... we all shed numerous sad, tears. The poor family. Her mother and her were very close. She only had her. And her older son from another marriage... but he is older. She had moved out...I guess no one knew really what was happening to her. Scary world out there. She was a good young woman, beautiful,funny, it is all so damn sad. Thanks so much for mentioning it. My heart will never forget this one. Seeing my son breakdown. Was hard. He knew she always had a crush on him. He said to me last night. Maybe I should have given her more of a chance.... I would never harm her. Poor guy. Trying to search his soul to protect. That's his way. That's all of our ways. Life is so hard for this younger generation. I'm seeing it so much these days. PLease everyone, tell everyone who you love that today!! Life is short. And fleeting. This young beautiful woman won't see her wedding day...or a child being born. Nothing. She better have her wings. Flying like an angel above. The poor sweet thing. Much love to you all my sisters in MBC. ~M~
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Gracie, you are in my thoughts and prayers this week, please let us know your test results! Thinking of you today.
Tanya, you have such a beautiful family! Wow! I absolutely love your picture! I hope that you get some answers from these tests.
Lynne, I loved the pictures of you and your Dh and all the minis! What a great trip! We used to have a motorcycle and go for rides with a group of riders, we always had such a good time! Now we do the same thing, but with horses! I hope we can get back to doing that again.
Minnie, good to see you!
Micmel, losing someone so young and in such a violent manner is so difficult. I hope that your Ds does not dwell on the what ifs. It is so easy to get caught up in that! But he must let it go. My heart is aching for her mother! I don't know how you are supposed to go on after losing a child.
Grannax, how is your daughter doing? Did they decide which one they are going to do? How are YOU doing? You are one tough lady!
I have been enjoying everyone's pictures and posts! I appreciate it!
My best friend was here for a couple of days. We have known each other since the fourth grade! We were discussing our childhood and what a sheltered life we had growing up. We wish our grandkids could have that kind of childhood, but in this day and age, it is not possible. Its really sad! We had so much freedom and we practically lived outdoor. We were such tomboys because the guys outnumbered us by three to one! So I grew up riding horses, playing baseball, football, dodgeball, ice hockey, ice skating, sled riding, all of the outdoor activities! Other than my dysfunctional family, my childhood was awesome! It was great reminiscing!
Hugs and prayers,
Claudia
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Lynne I would’ve been pressing my foot on an imaginary break coming out of those steep mountains. Those cars must be amazing. Happy you had such a great time.
Tanya
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hi ladies. Hope all is well. I was realizing I hadn't seen Elle at all lately. I know someone said they were going away for a little while. But I wasn't sure if it was her! Was just thinking of her.
Bigbhome~ hi sweetheart the entire community is devastated, it is just sickening and wrong. I don't understand how this could have happened. Such a beautiful child still really. So pretty so full of young laughter and life. She was a tiny girl. Athletic but not able to fight off a man. No one slept here last night and my DS is a zombie. And again another thing no one hasan answer for. Hope you're doing good. Adore you... hope DH is doing good! Hugs to you!
Waving hello to Minnie, Tanya, Grannax,Elle,Gracie,our Lynne's,MJH...Holmes..Mae..Chicagoan...GP....Runor....muddling.....Chelle....Divine....Lynnwood...iwrite....Jaycee...daywalker....have a good cool day. It's another hot one. Be safe. Hugs to you all!......Keetmom....Magda....Nan...KatyK and even Daniel and Leslie
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I forgot to update about my DD. The scan did not show a narrowing in the blood vessel in her brain. That means stent is not an option. I don't know when or if she will have another shunt. She and her DH want to have a long discussion with the Dr. before they decide to put in another one. She's had so many and none of them has really been effective. So, it feels like it was a hurry up and wait situation, add some miscommunication.
I'm doing well this cycle on IF. I think it's because I was off for a month and my counts got up to normal range. For me that means a high WBC, etc. I've already had labs and they aren't nearly as low as they usually are at this point in cycle. I'm glad for that because I need energy to keep up with my workers. I've been to Lowes every day this week for more supplies. Going again tomorrow. And more money so he can buy more stuff that only fits in his truck. UGH
It's looking really good. The paint color is pretty in bath, the wood ceiling in my bedroom is partially up so I can see how amazing it's going to look. Tomorrow wood floor in bath and maybe all doors, trim and baseboards painted.
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Hi Ladies, thank you for your kind words.
Micmel, such an awful thing to happen. Poor girl, and her poor Mother. I can't even imagine that sort of pain. Your son I'm sure is finding it hard to deal with, having known her.
Bigbhome, like you say, we were lucky to grow up in a World where we never seemed to worry. We spent all the time outdoors, we'd never heard of Child Murderers or Paedophiles. It's a different world for our Grandkids.
Tanya, gorgeous pics.
Tried to add an avatar, not sure it worked.
Night, night everyone. Thoughts and prayers are with you all xx
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Minnie I see It! I see a cutey patooty is what I see, yay! I agree it's a tragic thing. Today the obituary came out and it just became even more real. My poor son is really upset with this entire thing. Things like this do not happen near our quiet town. It's disgusting,Monday is the come to calling for two hours for the family to receive friends of hers. My. DS,DD, Chiefs mommy and daddy, and myself are all going to ride together. It's going to be extremely sad. I am in no way looking forward to seeing the heartbreak on this family's face. Especially her own mother, the entire thing is mind boggling, no one even knows what happened. Or who she was with, who called the police. Nothing. Just plain crazy, I feel like all week I've been living a life of law and order. This precious beautiful angel sat in my Living room and brought my son homemade Christmas cookies that she made for him. She was funny, kind and sweet, I think her down fall was the lack of male attention from her father, she needed male attention. In the end, I believe that is what may have killed her. They are extremely tight lipped about it. Nothing else has been released. Except service plans. It's a bad dream for sure.
Grannax~ I have been thinking about your DD and can't imagine how worried this makes you. We all just want to protect them no matter how old they get. I hope whatever is decided it doesn't cause her too much pain and or any discomfort. Sounds like you are kicking some remodeling butt! Glad you're finding some energy to get you motivated. It's excitingto think how it's coming along. You're making me want to find another project. Last summer it was my basement. Hmm this summer bridal shower and reception after such emotional turmoil. But when a young lovely woman gets brutally murdered, it puts our situation in a much better prospective overall. The thought of losing a child to death is unbearable. My goodness how can she be dealing. Or even saine. So saddened.... such-a waste of a beautiful person inside and out. Who knows now, if we will ever know anything about what really happened. But the community is rocked. To the core.
Bigbhome~ i Agee with you about my DS. He will do his grieving and he will always remember her. They were always close. But even he said lately she's been drifting away towards people their crowds didn't know. We are wondering if that had anything to do with it. Even her mother really didn't have any information. Which makes me think they might have been some what estranged. Or hadn't spoken in some time. It's really an odd thing. The more we learn about it. Thanks for the kind words. My heart is really broken. She was a doll baby. There are just no words really. Especially when you look at her. Crack! There goes my heart. I hope she is in heaven. Sometimes things like these make me wonder how could this happen ? I just wish I knew. Much love wonderful ladies. ~M~
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This is the beautiful young woman that is now an angel in heaven. She was only 20, and someone. Decided to harm her and I will never understand why. She was lovely in every way. Watch over the young ones. They are so easily swayed. She must have believed something someonesaid. To end up where she did. She was a precious funny young girl. Why is always the question anymore, with never any answers. Just more questions and difficult things to live through. Such a waste of a life not yet lived. Rest peacefully beautiful “A" you were so loved and so cared for. Neverforgotten. This is my tribute to you sweet girl. ❤️🌷🌹😩🤯 much love always my sweet girl ~M~0 -
Hi all,
Checking in. I have been very busy with last week of school activities, caring for both grands, gardening, etc. Think of everyone often. Continuing to feel very well.
Saddened to hear about the tragic death of that beautiful gal in your community, Micmel. Your poor DS must be so shaken. There are no words......there are some very sick individuals in our society....
Gracie-it must have felt awful when no one wished you luck on your scan, and I am so sorry for that. I'm sure I would have felt similarly. You know that it was a random oversight, but I understand if you feel the need to protect yourself.
Sending much love to all; more detailed post coming soon-MJH
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I shuddered when I saw the young lady's photo. As a parent, it hits too close to home. I wonder what will help her parents learn to live without her. Nothing right now, I'm sure. Convicting her murderer? Maybe. Supporting other parents who have lost a child to violence? Maybe. At the least we can hope they will find an online support group like ours.
MJH glad you are feeling well enough to be involved with all that fun stuff. It's the best medicine.
Yes, my remodel is making me want to redo every room in my thirty two year old home. I need to win the lottery but I don't play the lottery. LOL. The two weeks project is sure testing my flexibility. I made my nest in my guest room, my bedroom stuff is in the living room, the dog is in the cat room, the cat is in the sewing room. I have to plan my trips to anywhere around the workers lunch time. Thank goodness I trust them. Maybe I can catch up on things over the weekend. At least the dog will go home on Saturday, I can move the cat back to his room. He will be much happier in there and he does not yap at the workers. Ha Yapping Chihuahuas are not my favorite dog.
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MJH~ Thank you for the kind words. I'm just feeling such sorrow for her family, the helpless kind that you just don't know what to do? You want to call but don't want to Invade... it's been years. Since my DS and her dated, but they always remained close until recently. It seems that is a pattern with everyone she knew in our town. We are all afraid she fell into the wrong crowd after she left her familiar surroundings early as a young teenager. Obviously the people she was with weren't so good. We have seen new pics of her and she has bruises all over her body. My first inclination was she was in an abusive relationship. I know she was clumsy. But not like that. Something was different in her eyes. I'm sure her mother can see it now. It's always hindsight. It's starting to seem like they were estranged. Which shattered me even more. If I felt how I felt when my daughter and I argued like we did and it was tough even thinking she may not want me in her life. I was just broken. This poor woman can never make it right. Can never re do anything with her daughter. Monday is the calling. A bunch of her graduating class are going with me. I knew them all anyway basically. I don't think any of this is fair. Cancer is not fair. But at least I got to live and love for 48 years. She was going to just turn 21 in July. Makes me so mad and sad inside. Give me ten minutes with the person responsible for this. 💔😩. So yes MJH there are crazy people in our society.
Grannax~ I love the remodel spirit. That's what I need to read about. Things that make people smile. One day at a time I know. But I'll
Tell you. My heart is so empty these days, so much loss, I guess since it's life. That part will never end. It just comes in cycles. I still hate it! But I love you ladies. Hug your loved ones please !!! ~M~
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I’m thinking of everyone but there’s so much to catch up on and I’m wrapping things up at work and preparing for a weekend party at home. Hopefully, I’ll find some time to comment on specifics, until then, waiving hi!
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Micmel, so so sorry for this terrible tragedy.. What a precious young woman! It is truly heartbreaking how vicious some humans can be
I had a routine check up today, and am very grateful that my CA15-3 is still under 10 - it's been like that since the end of chemo last year August, and for me tumor markers correspond with my scans.. Now we are eating popcorn while enjoying World Cup soccer lol.
Blessings to all of you, here in South Africa it is winter now, but enjoy your summer months ladies!
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Daywalker~Hello darling. I am Very happy to hear that your tumor markers are showing good things for you. Congrats! 🍾🥂😊 I am the same way. They always tell my Story, kick your heels up and breathe a sigh of relief. You deserve it..... enjoy the World Cup and relax!!
thank you for mentioning what happened to this precious angel.. it's so scary to think that just one person could Come into a young woman's life and totally take her into dangerous situations or maybe introduce her to people who aren't exactly college bound. One may never know. I said to the kids Tuesday night when everything was coming out, that we may never hear anything about it again. Especially murder. If the family doesn't want information released, it won't be. So,always throughout our town we will always wonder what happened to this beautiful young woman, who had her life cut short for what? For someone else deciding to hurt her. That's just not fair. Why can't people mind their own business and just leave others alone. Do not lay your hands on another. People are just disgusting and disregard beautiful life. Here we are praying and fighting for every day we get.. Due to cancer, and this precious thing had someone else end her life for her ? I cannot wrap my head around how a god could allow that. I Am at such a loss for understanding things that happen a lot lately and sometimes, it just wrecks me.
SO again I am thrilled your results are good. Please keep Sharing good news ladies. Anything at all!!
Grannax~ how is today's effort for the remodel going for you? I am jealous!! I want hard wood floors. Maybe DH has a project coming his way soon lol one that he doesn't know about yet. Good thing he has mentiones wanting them too, maybe that will make it easier.. how is your DD? She is in my thoughts.
much love ladies ~M~
Keetmom you ok ?
Do we have any scanners this week? I
don’t want to forget anyone ever. I realize that there is no way I can comment or remember everything, and you ladies cannot be expected to either. I write a lot in my posts, there is. No way I would expect everyone to remember or even comment on everything. To me it’s just understood that we are here to support each other. Sometimes when you read a post, it may confuse someone or the sentence isn’t clear. I believe that is what happened with Gracie for sure. I went back to look because I felt so badly. I was confused when I read the sentence. I will apologize again, never want anyone to feel otherwise loved and supported. It’s why I made this thread, for everyone to feel at home!! Loved and supported!
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I just got a call from the nurse that tumor markers are way down again. I like the downward.trend and hope it continues. Starting fourth round of Ibrance tomorrow.
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