My Husband, My Life, My Love, My Family, My Cancer
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Tanya~ thank you for the good wishes for my daughter. Life is so hard, it does help to know if something should happen to me, she is making her team for life. I want a man to help her and protect her the way my sweet husband has. That will help me Rest In Peace should it come earlier than anyone of us would ever want.
I was reflecting on your comment on what you over heard your DH sayand it really struck my heart. We shouldn't have to have loved ones ever say those things, we should be ok to live life. Not struggle through every single thing, like we are stuck walking through thick syrup! It just made my heart hurt. My DH has said things like that and when I feel sick, like dealing with this flu, it's makes it all seem so real, that the down words spiral could just happen like that!! I just want to live and take care of my family. We aren't hurting anyone. None of us are! Never will understand why. Never.
Waving hi to Lynne (50's)! Ready for the big game ? Sunday?
Mae~ how is Mae? Hope you're good!
Much love ~M~
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Bigbhome, your post also concerned me. I pray everything will be ok for you and your DH! Please keep us posted! We are sending prayers and good thoughts to both of you.
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bigbhome, prayers coming all the way across the ocean. Please God.xx
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Hi all, I’m here. Dinner and a movie with DH is Carne Asada burritos and Indiana Jones Raiders of the Lost Ark (so 1981, lol).
Had a very productive work day, I love those.
Woke up to my beautiful boy biggie snoozing hard.
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Bigbhome...my prayers are immediately with you and your DH, sending you lots of hugs, comfort and strength. You're having such a horrible time lately that I'm very concerned for you. Please know that my thoughts are zooming all the way from Australia and, as our time zone is ahead of yours, they will be with you right now.
Minnie....I'm sure your scan will be fine. I was very anxious this time too for some reason and it was stable, as you know. I think we all get the scares occasionally and that's allowed. I'm holding your hand and thinking of you.
Grannax....sending you hugs and love.
Micmel....please get fully well soon. I'm sure you'll look beautiful at your daughter's wedding. Btw she's a beautiful girl ~ lovely features and I can see the character in her face. It's tough trying to find clothes when we're not well enough to go trying them on for all the usual reasons ~ possibly picking up an infection and the fatigue. At the best of times, trying on one outfit after another is tiring. Have you thought of looking online? It's a bit iffy buying online, I know, because you can't really tell what it will be like. Or do you have a friend who would go to a store where they let you take some outfits out of the store "on appro"? Some stores will do that. Or, perhaps a dressmaker might come to your house and measure you up. There's always an easier way, I find. Re prosthetics, I've bought mine online from the US and had them sent to Australia as I haven't found anything comfortable here. I don't know whether you have that organised but if you'd like to know more about the ones I bought, you can PM me. They're very comfortable, although I had a bilateral mastectomy so I don't have to be concerned about having an evenly weighted prosthetic to match up with a remaining breast.
We were discussing privacy and I wasn't concerned but I did google my screen name and my posts came up. I'm not concerned about that because I know that this site can be followed but I've removed my actual photo, as you can see, and found someone cuter than I am!
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Leapfrog, I deleted the family photos I posted but they still come up when I google my screen name. I've had my identity stolen in the past, what a mess, and that's why I'm so paranoid about privacy.
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I’m officially concerned about the privacy of this site. I changed my profile picture. I need to be able to share some things here.
Have a great weekend all.
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I am not all that concerned. There's is no important information that hasn't already been posted on my DD's Snapchat and things she's already shared. I've tried googling my by screen name and. Nothing comes up. I am not very worried about pictures. They don't carry information other than faces and they move quickly on this thread. Like I have noticed before my real name produces way more information then a screen name ever could. I have nothing to steal really.
There are way more websites that I would worry about more than this one. Even my banking information while purchasing gifts online was compromised at least twice. So anything you do online is just that online. If you shop online, you're putting out way more information there, Than anything you could ever put here. We don't use full names and would never use it if I even knew any of yours. What I have done with a few. Is exchange phone numbers and we text daily. This is my oasis,if there is anything anyone gains from a group of women fighting for their lives, they need a new hobby!!! Changing pics is a good idea if it makes you feel better, that's all that matters !! Also, millions of screen names have been created, everyone who has ever held an account online for anything, already has some information floating out there, which is a lot more specific, than the general information here. I am sure hospitals share stats anyway, so my medical information is already exposed. No specific information could come out of this site. There is no information to be had. Sorry you guys are worried. But I don't think it's really worrisome, who would ever think just to google a screename anyway?
There would Need to be a reason, and here are so many similar names. Just seems too complicated to be worrisome. I would worry if we entered any credit information or things like that! I like the news pics you all chose. Even though you're beautiful the way you are ! Much love ~M~
Loving the puppy Mae!! I love him!! Hugs ~M~
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Thanks Leapfrog. Probably stressing over nothing. Taking it out on closest people, well, just not really wanting to go anywhere or see anybody.
Illymae love Raiders of the lost ark. Laughs and thrills, and Harrison Ford of course.
Re privacy I haven't had a profile pic, have posted a few family pics but no names, and Minnie ain't my proper name, so not worried. Don't want to lose this group, it helps. Hands across the world.
Have a good saturda
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Minnie~ Hi sweety. I feel the same way you do. I really don't ever want to go out! It's cold and I am tired. Please know youre not alone, I so understand the scanxiety. I wish we could all. Sit with each other and talk about the things that are the hardest that only each other can even understand. I'm still trying to recover from the flu. It hit me hard. Two weeks tomorrow that I have been hit with it, first week bad bad, second week just fatigue and tiredness and just overall exhaustion. I am sending you hugs across the miles. ~M ~ much love stay safe and warm this weekend. I have bloodwork and XGeva shot on Friday. Yuck!
Thinking of bigbhome! Sending you hugs of concern and strength!
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trying to catch up.
Micmel, oh my gosh, I am so incredibly happy for you and your news about your daughter. What a wonderful thing to have happen. It was the best time of my life watching my children get married. I hope you have a wonderful time planning, and spending time together, and all the laughter and all the tears, and after it’s over the complete fatigue, that every parent feels at the completion of something really important. I cannot express to you how happy I am for you and your daughter, that you get to experience this incredible thing! Sooooo happy for you!!!!
Bigbhome
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lost part of my post!!!
Bigbhome, praying for you and your family. I hope things get better!
Micmel, your daughter is beautiful, she’s going to look gorgeous as a bride!!!
Mae, I love the Raiders movies!!! And love your dog!!! Such a cutie!
Minnie, thinking of you, hoping you are doing ok today!
Anybody I may have missed and I know there are a lot, know that I think of all of us often and pray for you all!
On privacy, I guess I’m just really naïve. I never even thought about someone reading our posts here and them not being private. That just kind of scares me half to death. I know that there’s another breast cancer site on Facebook because I joined it not too long ago, but I never thought about information going from here to there or from there to here, although I’m kind of guilty about that myself saying that I was upset by what someone had said to me about my mouth being sore after my first ibrance pill.
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Thar is really scary!!!
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thank you Gracie~ something I thought I may never see. I am very happy to be able to be a part of this. More than words can express. The planning has already started and tomorrow we go to place a down payment on the venue, which is a beautifully restored train station car, which is very large. It's going to be amazing. She's is magnificent not only outside, but inside. She's a good daughter and I love her so much. My son isn't also very supportive and happy for her. This family needed something good to happen! Been a long hard two years. For almost everyone I know really.
The privacy thing doesn't bother me, if we didn't know there are people reading the posts, then why are we here? Don't give out personal information to anyone you don't trust. Think about it Gracie, you and I have talked on the phone several times. We are friends. I would never mention anything personal.... nor would you. Choosing to use your real name is your choice. But I don't think Breast cancer. Org would attract many people who don't have concerns or scares dealing with cancer. I could certainly find better things to do, if I didn't have cancer and was well enough to be doing what I always did. The only reason I found this place was because i was searching for answers, I didn't google any names just questions, that have been discussed here on many threads repeatedly! There is nothing personal really here,
However, I do think that having cancer is very personal. I chose to come here and post knowing without a doubt, that the point was....that people would be reading it. That's the point of being here. The pics I can understand. Even your state. Totally makes sense. But I believe people that read what we say are people needing support. If the mods over see our PM's they are most likely looking for key words or phrases that would alarm them and I don't believe they are collecting personal information. I went to the offices. It's not evasive and they showed me many things for planning the possible new site, it was just to assure user friendly site access. They are not big brother. Chose what you post, carefully if you feel you need too. Everyone understands personal reasons for feeling the way they do about what anyone wouldrelease. It's just smart not to get too personal even if you're in public speaking to someone across the table. That's how I look at it. Love you guys ! ~M~
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Bighome-Praying for you and your husband. I hope they figure out what is going on with you. Hugs!
Grannax-Glad you are getting your insurance money in.
MJH and Lynne-I'm ready for the big game tomorrow! The kids and grandkids are coming over. I hope the snow isn't too bad. Hopefully, our team wins! And yes, I made it through another "hell" week. I was able to attend my friend's husband's funeral yesterday. They both graduated from high school with me, and have been together since high school as my husband and I have been. They got married 2 weeks before us (almost 35 years ago). Cancer got another great person (pancreatic, lasted 22 months, he was 55). There were a lot of our classmates there.
Minnie-I'm having scans on Monday, and I too am stressing about the scans. I should be used to it after nearly 6 years, but it never gets easier. Hugs!
My tumor markers were 145. Up a little from Nov, but not as high as 350 that it went up to in the past, yet not as low as 25 that it was at one point either. We'll see what Monday brings.
I hope that everyone is feeling better and things get better for you.
I'll be busy tomorrow cheering on the Patriots, I'll try to get on Monday after the morning of scans! Hugs!
Lynne
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Thank you Lynne, wishing you well for Monday too. Thank you Gracie. Micmel, that venue sounds great.
I feel because I am having so much pain at the moment something has to be wrong, but time will tell.
Bigbhome, prayers for you. Love to all x
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Lynne(Man)~ I will be forced to watch the game because of my kids and my son. I won’t last the entire game though. I am already tired and I just woke up. It was cold last night. Like 15 here! I am gma you made it through hell week. I don know how you are able to do so many chemos. When I had my nine abraxane, th neuropathy started being so. Bad in my fingers and my hands. It was terrible. You’re amazing to me! Hugs to you beautiful! Good luck today. My eagles will try to fly high today! I’m hoping that we get our chance to shine! Much love ~M~
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Minnie~ I always have those moments of worry, basically every single day. The pains to me seems to jump all over me at some point. I am going to choose to think tumor burn and the pain is the medicine getting and kicking it's ass! Love you dear sweet Minnie. I am thinking of all those with scans. I am getting blood work on Friday. Which hasn't happened for three months. Still makes me nervous. Ohh the lives we are forced to live! Much love ~M~ Thanks for the Venue mention. It's supposes to be very lovely! Much love ~M~
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Mornin’
Micmel, congrats on the upcoming wedding, should be a wonderful event for the entire family.
No Super Bowl plans for us (not into football), I’m thinking Lasagna, Garlic bread, Salad and a movie.
Gotta get going though, must pick up a few groceries, then clean kitchen/dishes while DH does the sweeping/mopping.
Hope it’s a pleasant Sunday for all
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Hi gals!
Bighome-really worried for you and DH. Here in your corner wanting the best. Lots of positive thoughts and prayers are coming your way from all here.
Minnie- bummer on the scanxiety- i have often said that I wish there was a "waiting pill" we could take to forget we were waiting!
Mae- love your sweet routine of dinner and a movie. Your job sounds really interesting.
Micmel- a restored railway car? How absolutely cool! I love it! Hope you are feeling some progress in your recovery.
Lynne(Man) and 50's girl, here we go again with our Pats! I am making slider roast beef sandwiches and fresh strawberry pie for the gathering we will attend. Lynne(man) -so pleased for you to have made it to the service. At least it's milder today!
Gracie-hope you are surviving the rigors of Ibrance-improving...
Lynnwood, Leapfrog, Tanya, Runor, Grannax, Nan, and all of the rest of you dear souls, have a peaceful, nuisance and pain free Sunday
Best, MJH
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Mae~ I love hockey! But also like football. I just hope they win. Have seen the flyers from row four and they were fantastic, was a bucket list item I had crossed off and didn't even realize. The same as seeing Elton John..
Today we went to see the venue for the reception and it was beautiful, perfect for her. Just the right style and size it has an outdoor room, which will be used for a bar tending kiosk, and the main room has an adjacent room for where the dinner will be served away from the reception area. There is also a nice patio area where chairs and table will be offered. It's perfect. She did a great job finding it. It's all coming together, I just hope I can remain as in good health as I Am today, I can't bear to be less of a woman for that day. I worry about everything turning for the worse! It's so scary knowing you have a life you love so much, but a failing body. So aware of everything you would love to do....but can't ....because of the failing body... what will I wear. I only have one boob. It's going to overwhelm me. But one day at a time is all I can do. It is very exciting though. Much love ~M~
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Part of the main room! Looks lovely with the wood! So pretty.
the wedding cake goes there in the center....🎂🎂🎂🎂🎂. The hall way leads to the bathrooms and the food service area... it's the neatest refurbished train station I've seen in a long Time ! Great choice DD!! 0 -
Very pretty!!!! Going to be wonderful!!!
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this is the view from outside the train station.... it's beautiful and the landscaping is lovely that time of year. I am getting so excited! 
The walkways into the venue next to the train tracks. All re done and is just brand new. 0 -
The very front and the entrance. Looks old time. Stone and inside all wood. It’s really lovely ! 🤗🤗🕯🕯0 -
love it Micmel. Don't worry about the missing boob, you will find a beautiful outfit, and no one will ever think about it. I'm a one and a half boob person and don't care anymore. DH is the only,one who sees them anyway lol!
No,football here, it's Rugby for the next 6 weeks. Six nations including Ireland who we will cheer on all the way. We beat France yesterday just scoring in the last second!
Two nice steaks for dinner, mushroom sauce, fries. Well, it is Sunday! I need the iron.
Watched 3 Billboards outside Ebbing Missouri. Anyone seen it? Also The Darkest Hour , Gary Oldman up for an Oscar I believe. Very good.
Off to try some sleep. Happy Sunday you wonderful people x
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Minnie~ sleep well special lady! I appreciate the kind words. I just don't want to look like a frumpy woman who can’t wear beautiful shoes or clothing because cancer stole my figure and some body parts. It stinks. But I'll do my best. I'm just excited for her. 💜💜💜💜
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Micmel, the venue looks lovely! I’m so happy for you! I’m sure you can find something nice to wear. Have you heard of knitted knockers? They are very soft handmade prosthetic and they are lightweight and best of all free. I have a set I can send you if you want to try them. I guess we’re doing the same thing right now...go Eagles!!! With a husband and 3 sons no choice tonight!
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on the edge of my seat Lynnwood. My heart can't take it! It is just too much to take. I also am not enjoying the referees. Sometimes ya can't see perfectly. So we move on. I don't like my blood pressure right now. Wish it was a shorter game. I need to breathe. 🤭🤯 ~M~
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I am am sitting here with no voice. It's has officially gone....I have never screamed so much. What a great game. Those patriots just never give up! Kudos to them. I am happy of course that the eagles 🦅 won. It was a nail biter for sure. Hope everyone is warm and cozy.
Today something so incredibly special happened to me and my DD. We had been talking about her dress that she wanted to wear to her reception. So she was going for the $99 bridal dress type of purchase, (which is ok with me, but if I could help I wanted too) They are trying to save money....so I knew that when I got married I had taken my wedding dress and had it preserved for perhaps one day, maybe she would like to just see it and have it as a remembrance item.(so I got to thinking, and went and got the box and handed it to her) She asked me if I had veil in the box, we ended up opening the box and next thing I knew she had the dress on and it fit her like a glove!
IT is magnificent it went right on her and she fell in love with it immediately. I was so flattered and honored. She was so happy and her smile was so amazing and she was glowing. I was so touched that she actually liked it. It needs one little alteration in the sleeves, she wants the poof out of the sleeve a little and they can pretty much do whatever they would like with it. She's gonna keep the length of the gown. It is really an amazing gown and back then it was expensive. I can't imagine what it would be now. So now she has her gown. We are thrilled. It's going to be really special seeing her in that dress. I'm deeply touched, a wedding for my daughter was a huge surprise. Now her choosing to wear my dress, is blowing my mind. It fits her like a glove and I'm not kidding we were shocked. She started to cry I started to cry it was touching. I never thought I was that tiny. What happened to me? Lol.
She looked like a princess in that dress. She's even wearing the veil. I am going to buy her shoes. I put the deposit down for the venue today, so I am trying to help wherever we can. DH is a photographer and he's going to take care of the photos, which saves a lot of money, gotta wrangle the DJ. She wants real flowers for her bouquet. I was hoping for silk flowers. That way she would always have them, and they can be very real looking and last forever. We are now working on figuring out the Center pieces. So fun. So happy. Feel so glad for this chance. My today was perfect...Saw the beautful train station venue, and booked it for her, the date is saved ... my daughter tried on my wedding dress and loved it and looked amazing it. Will barely need any alterations....and the Eagles finally won the super bowl.!! 🏈 🍾 It's been a pretty darn good day! I'm going to bed without a voice. Lol. AGood day indeed. Be safe everyone. Much love ~M~
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