My Husband, My Life, My Love, My Family, My Cancer
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KittyKat, I’m glad the talk went as well as could be expected with your daughter and that you’ll get to see Finn. Sending hugs your way.
I’m up for pocket duty for anyone who needs it.
Candy, I hope they’re getting to the bottom of your fevers.
Mel, I’m sorry about your mom and your sister.
Hugs to all. I can’t sleep. We all know how that is.
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Kitty, Mel, Candy and all others struggling, I am in your pocket and always sending my love and healing thoughts your way.
Decided to walk and get sour cream first thing, got pretty tired and hot which is not unusual for me. Also got cheese on sale, can freeze, use later. I must admit there were sections where my body felt tired and I stopped but did make it both ways a sweaty mess. What is missing lately is heavy breathing which is a step in the right direction, I'm done exercise for today 8500 steps with cane. I feel less awkward and it did not feel as long but my mind largely shifts to making sure I plant feet correctly and using cane to reestablish balance which seems to work. Anyway, that all I have for now.
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KittyKat, I'm sure you're glad to have the talk and stop dreading it. One blessing of not having trick or treaters is not eating the leftovers although you know they are terrible for you. I used to get one bag I liked and one I didn't to cut down the damage.
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I finally had a decent night's sleep last night. Sort of dozed off with my earbuds listening to Agatha Christie. Took them out and heard light rain outside. We're in San Diego, so it's a big deal to get rain.
KittyKat, I had my first biopsy for Stage II cancer on Halloween 2007 and got "the call" two days later - the day before my DH's birthday. Funny how we remember certain dates. I found the lump in my armpit on 2/22/20 which led to my Stage IV diagnosis.
It's still kind of gray outside. It's a perfect day to hang out in mel's living room with a cup of coffee or maybe a cup of hot chocolate. I'm sending everyone love and hugs.
Carol
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sunshine, I’ve got my coffee right here!
Kitty, I am glad to read that your talk with DD went as well as possible.
Yesterday I went to a friend’s house for a girls night, we ordered pizza, had snacks, brownies, and I had one glass of wine. We watched Hocus Pocus 1 and 2. It was nice. Just relaxing today.
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Just want to share a bit of Mother Nature’s beauty - this is the street to our daughter’s home. Every year there is effort by all the trees to synchronize in color and it is breathtaking! Wish we could all stand under the blue sky together and let this bring us joy
My knee replacement recovery is moving forward. Baby steps……0 -
just lovely. Gorgeous foliage!
Hello Mara!
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Goldens- it is very breathtaking! It is beautiful! I love this time of year! Happy to hear your knee replacement surgery went well.
Kittykat- I'm glad your talk with your daughter went ok. It sounds like you have a lot of chauffeurs to drive you around. I'm always in your pocket.
Kikomoon- isn't it nice to have a girls night and just enjoy the food and drink and entertainment
Sunshine- I think I would fall asleep to Agatha Christie too.
It was another beautiful day here today. 20C outside.
Went into Charlottetown and took special son out. A lot of walking. I think everyone was out walking their dogs. Of course we had to stop and say hello!
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Goldens, beautiful picture of the leaves.
Living, glad you had a good time watching movies.
Mel, hello my friend, glad to hear from you.
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Taking more of a rest day today. Not sure what the issue was yesterday, walking went fine, walked 9000 ish steps round trip to the grocery store, was cool but came home super hot and spent the rest of the day practically asleep. The walk itself was fine but once I got home and had breakfast, all my energy left me and I slept well. Tired of being hot and sweaty so think I will do the bulk of walking inside and go back to taking the bus, just factor the bus into my grocery bill and schedule some mall walking days in there as well, say do an hour of walking within the mall. We will see about that.
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always tired is my new official name. I had my mouth in order but now it's flaring up again and is quite painful. Sometimes I ask. Is taking medicine that slowly is killing me ? Any different then letting nature take its course. If I didn't have three kids and a loving DH I would go off medicine all together. My mother is is losing her will I can hear it when we talk. Sometimes I cant even make sense of what she's saying. It's hearting (hurting) my heart. I don't want to loose my mother. She's all I have left of my parents and I am the closest to her by leaps and bounds. I'm worried for this home placement. What if it's dirty. And loud. What if she doesn't like it and gets beyond upset. There is nothing I can do. Cancer makes you feel Helpless , hopeless , angry , sad, confused. I am so depleted of energy I don't even have. I hope you're all doing better than me. Add in my sister. And 💥 💥 boom.
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Mel, sending you love and hugs. I hear your overwhelmed self in your post. 🌺
Thanks to those who were in my pocket while I waited for my ct results. It was overall good with decreasing or stable liver mets, and a few spinal mets increased but others decreased. My MO said the treatment is definitely working (Eribulin/Halaven) and I’ll be continuing on it. Yippee! But . . . there was also a mention of pathological fractures at a couple thoracic vertebrae. So I’m having an mri tomorrow to see if they need a procedurelike kyphoplasty (I think?). We’ll see. I feel happy that the chemo drug has my MO confident that it’s working.
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Micmel, I’m sorry you having such a hard time but do understand, you got a lot to deal with. I hope everything eases up for you and you can find renewed energy and peace.
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Oh, Mel. My heart hurts for you. The things that are hurting you are outside of your control, but they don't hurt any less for that. I pray for you for a night of peaceful rest, that will give you strength and emotional balance to keep dealing with your stressors. Hugs.
Rosie- good news on the CT results. Ouch! for the fractured vertebrae.
Hi Mara, LivingIVLife, Tanya, Goldens, Booboo, Mae, Kitty, and everyone else. Sending out a big group cyberhug- I think we could all use one.
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Mel, I am sorry about your Mom, that is rough and I can empathize with the worry about where she will be and her being your remaining parent. I am also sorry about your mouth being sore. I'll be thinking of you and your family, mom and sister.
I am glad about your results Rosie but sorry about the fracture as well.
Waving hi to you too seeq.
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Oh Mel - a gigantic hug for you❤️. So much to have no control over. I’m sorry your mouth sores have flared up again. I will pray you find some peace
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Mel, Candy, Kitty, Rosie and everyone who is dealing with either fever, sick family, mouth sores, I am in your pockets and sending healing thoughts to you all and hoping for relief soon. I know I put everyone together but everyone has had so much going on, wanted to include everyone I could.
I am not doing much, construction in my building next door saw the original door moved over. It is weird but I don't care what they do at this point. Now that there is mail, flyers are being put on the mailbox again. I'll collect and recycle as no one else will do it and I cannot just complain, not a problem to put it out on garbage day. Waiting on Amazon as my charger broke. Walking at home in short bursts til I am tired of it, better to maintain energy throughout day. I had a bunch of old el paso taco seasonings, finally combining those with a big seasoning container
Going to experiment with some actual oatmeal. Not to eat oatmeal but to combine with different foods like when I make a frozen hamburger and grind it or possibly the beefless ground. Could also just grind the oatmeal with the spice grinder as an extra sort of seasoning, we will see. You know me, all about the stretching. I got steel cut oats so they are a coarse powder but I did grind them to a more fine powder. Added some chicken seasoning to the grinder and in a frypan, did two eggs, powdered oatmeal, wheat bran and seasoned with salt, italian and steak seasoning in pan. Once eggs, oatmeal and wheat bran mixture mixed together, plated and added small amounts ketchup, mustard and mayo to bind. It was a good way to make the eggs last longer with good fiber. I also think I could make peanut butter with a bit of oatmeal as well. Have to measure but will try it as a good snack. We will see. May also make a chocolate milk with a spoonful of oats and peanut butter powder, so many possibilities.
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Mel,
Cancer cannot cripple love, it cannot shatter hope, it cannot conquer the spirit. (Unknown).
Hang in there.
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- I love that saying Laurie, I totally agree with it. So much on Mel's shoulders at the same time and I really wish I could go and help her in person. She needs a break from all these things at the same time.
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I am here for pocket duty for anyone who needs it.
Candy, Have your doctors made any progress in learning what is causing your fever? Are you now back on treatment?
Mel, I am sorry for everything you are going through. It is way too much to experience at one time without feeling overwhelmed and somewhat defeated. I am sure that your mom is glad that you are giving her support at a time when she could feel very much alone. She feels your love. It is so difficult to lose our parents. They share all our early memories with us and give us the foundation that is the basis of our lives. I lose my parents several years ago, but I still talk to my mom. Am I crazy? Maybe, but sometimes I just want to share with her or feel her smile. We are all her for you.
There are many people on this thread who are going through rough times right now. My thoughts are with you.
I am having an MRI of my lower spine next week to see if the mets in my dura have spread there since I am experiencing weakness in my left leg. I am pretty sure that Mae has had suspicious looking things going on there in the past that have been negative, so I am going for that for now.
Sending hugs to everyone and wishing we could have coffee and snacks together in the living room.
Lynne
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50's, in your pocket for scans, lending support as always. If we were able to have snacks and coffees, I would bring the milkshake type smoothie with chocolate milka and peanut butter powder, so thick, so good and full of protein. How are you feeling post WBR?
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Dear 50s,
If you're crazy, than count me into the club (I like “Crazytown"!). If this disease doesn't make you a little nuts, than I'd like to know what does. I remember telling my MO why I can't understand why each of us isn't immediately assigned a psychiatrist as part of our treatment plan, but she just stared at me. Wouldn't it be nice to be immediately connected to a living room like ours to help with the minormental anxiety we've all been through? Anyway, good for you and for the many women, including me, who have enjoyed your pearls of wisdom. God bless.
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Booboo, I would sign up for the psychiatrist if anyone offered it! My MO has just sort of been prescribing me anything nowadays. Latest is Gabapentin. I take Mirtazapine, mementa, iron, d3, and b12 right now. Have tramadol and some other painkiller that don’t work on my pain in my foot so don’t take them currently which I am very thankful.
I am so sorry Mel about all you are dealing with right now. I send all the hugs in the world to you. Can you feel the love from this living room? I hope so, at least it’s a small comfort in this crazy town
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50sgirl, in your pocket for mRI with baked pumpkin oatmeal cups.
Rosie- good scans, yay! In your pocket also for vertebrae with snacks.
I guess I’ve still got some steroids in my system from Enhertu infusion yesterday. Cleaning out the pantry and found cinnamon sticks, cloves, and mulling spices. Will probably throw them on the stove to make the house smell of the season.
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Mara, I am doing well after WBR. I am trying to keep busy knitting, reading, cleaning out drawers and closet, doing crossword puzzles and such. I do feel tired sometimes but I think it is from lack of sleep. I find myself resting well at night, but not necessarily sleeping well. Lots of family things going on, so I tend to think about that
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50's, I am glad to hear you are doing fairly well, the sleep will return in time for sure.
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50's~ I can relate to the family issues going on. I'm trying to keep it together . My mom is going downhill. Almost scary how fast I'm losing her. She didn't sound right for a few weeks now. I kept telling everyone something wasn't right. Never dreamed it be so many things she put off , that now it's too late to get better. I feel defeated because I can't even hold her hand. I hear the fear in her voice. At least with my dad I had him brought here because he was more local. That's not an option here. So I can't even visit her. I haven't seen her in 19 years. Talk every day. But haven't seen her. Begged her to move back years ago. Now it's too late. I checked flights just to see. $1400 for a flight. I don't have that. Nor could my spine take the travel and hoteling that would take place. I nap at noon till 300 and in Bed again at 900. If I don't my body starts to weird out and I get pekid and shaky. I'm rocked between the hard places ! I'm slowly losing my mother, breaking my person down. Worrying about my sister. Just stress
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Sorry to read of everyone's struggles. I am sorry I cannot individually mention each person. I just don't have the energy-physical or mental- anymore.
My fevers have stopped in the last 3 days. Thank God. Monday was the first fever free day in 1 month!!!! All testing so far has come back negative. No Port infection. I don't know what it was. Hope it don't come back. I was off Lynparza for 3 weeks. Started back last night. Lower dose. Was 500mg per day-- 250mg am, 250mg pm. Now 400mg per day--- 200mg am, 200mg pm. I see my MO again in the office Nov 7 for an update and scans to see if all is still stable.
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Mel, hugs going out to you and your family. It's too much. I'm sorry you are so far from your Mom. I am in all of your pockets.
My body had some fun with me, did not wind up really sleeping, happens any morning appointment day at cancer. Seeing MO and getting Herceptin. Will try to keep verbal diarrhea to a minimum, I just chat a lot.
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