My Husband, My Life, My Love, My Family, My Cancer

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  • micmel
    micmel Member Posts: 10,057

    Very sorry read of NKB’s passing. This disease is just relentless. I wish her family peace at this time. Another sister lost to this hairy a**hole cancer.

  • goldensrbest
    goldensrbest Member Posts: 733

    sf-cakes - what in the heck is wrong with some people? Geez Louise don’t work in the service industry if you can’t be kind.

    Cookie - hope you can find a new doggie soon. How great that you will rescue.

    Shanagirl - very scary experience. Hope you get some answers.

  • shanagirl
    shanagirl Member Posts: 446

    Good morning. I think it’s evolved into a terrible virus. I feel real sick and weak, have slight cough chest pain and nausea. I’m going to ride this out and rest today. Please know that I am not one to go to the emergency room or an urgent care center, I’ll call my onc team today and have it on record for my visit next week. I had only wanted to know if this had happened to anyone, and if it could possibly be Pneumonitis which I do not know much about…. I also had to resolve my dental issue of whether I will have to go for a root canal before I see my Onc next week. I have an appointment for a cleaning and Exrays today. I will be seeing. My dentist who knows me well, and I can talk to him about the XGEVA. He was away for the Holidays and I was seen by a covering dentist who suggested the root canal and said it would be “OK” to do while on Xgeva. So I will have some answers today after my 12 O’clock appt. In the meantime I will jump int the shower and get ready for the appointment. I’ll check in later🩵

  • mkestrel
    mkestrel Member Posts: 180

    Hi all, thought I'd share something that has been helping me sleep.

    NSDR non sleep deep rest by Dr. Huberman. It's on YouTube. My physical therapist recommended I try this and said it helped him a lot.

    I wake up every night when my muscle relaxer wears off and it's hard to go back to sleep. I also have trouble going to sleep in the first place. Anyway, this has been helping me.

  • mara51506
    mara51506 Member Posts: 6,512

    shanagirl, as I am sure you will, tell MO, if you have anything else tell your PCP as well and if it happens again, a trip to emerg should be considered. In your pocket sending healing vibes for you.

    SF, I am sorry you had such a bad coversation with the assistant. While they may deal with a lot of stuff from different patients, they should always bear in mind we go through a lot ourselves. I am sorry that happened to you.

    Cookie, glad you found swagbucks. There are many more offers you can do in US and that is great, good for you!

    I am staying home, just made an egg mcmuffin, two eggs though in the sandwich maker this time and toasted buttered english muffins that I sprinkled the cheese on, tot too much seasoning. Still adding garlic etc to the ranch dressing. I bought Kraft three cheese ranch and not really enjoying it but stubornly not wanting to toss it out so will just add other things to it. Other than that, I slept late for me, woke around 11 am. Laundry has not even started.

    In everybody's pocket and hope all have a decent day.

  • sunshine99
    sunshine99 Member Posts: 2,723

    Good morning, ladies! I had another decent night’s sleep last night.

    Yesterday, I went to the lab to get my blood drawn for the genetic testing. I decided, while I was there, I might as well go to the Health Express to make sure this cough wasn’t progressing into pneumonia. (By the way, I LOVE Pas. I seem to get so much more time and attention from them.) Anyway, I do NOT have COVID (yay), but I do have a nasty ear infection. Was prescribed antibiotics and when I asked about the size of the pill, she asked if I wanted a liquid form. Another yay!

    Got a CXR – no pneumonia, but the whatever they saw before is growing, so they forwarded the test to my MO, PCP, and pulmonologist.

    Am now playing phone tag with the radiation scheduler since it was FINALLY approved.

    Cookie, I don’t remember if your red cells are high or low. Mine were high for a long time and my first MO always asked if I smoked (never did) and was eventually diagnosed with polycythemia with no known cause. I had a few therapeutic phlebotomy sessions. It’s better now, but I never felt any ill effects.

    Emac, I’ll be starting on Truqap as soon as I finish radiation. I hope the SEs are easier the Piqray.

    I hadn’t heard of NKB. Damn! This sucks!

    Shanagirl, I’m sorry this is getting worse, not better. I hope your MO can, at least, give you some direction. I totally get not wanting to go to the ER or Urgent Care.

    Mkestrel, sleep is so random for me. I’ll look up the NSDR. I’ve not heard of it. Last night, I took Zzzzquil and slept well. I doesn’t always work, though.

    Am drinking small sips of hot coffee. It’s a rainy day here in San Diego. Kind of a nice change for us.

    Mel, how is your mouth? DH is getting mouth sores, but I think it’s related to a cold. Am “letting” him use my Colgate Peroxyl. It seems to help.

    Waving hi to all. Mara, my local grocery store is carrying hash brown patties again. Yay!

    Carol

  • sunshine99
    sunshine99 Member Posts: 2,723

    I saw this on FB this week. I seemed appropriate and worth sharing.

    "finally, my bills are washed, laundry is paid, clothes are baking, and dinner is in the dryer. I've got this!"

    My, oh my! I can SO relate!

  • threetree
    threetree Member Posts: 1,753

    Shanagirl - OMG, I just felt so bad reading about what happened to you! Scary indeed. It sounds like you might be a little better now and that's wonderful of course. I think if it was me, I would at least go to urgent care and get some sort of an opinion/reassurance. Yes, it does sound like maybe a virus. I've been dealing with that too, and it's why I haven't been on the site much lately, as totally wiped out and hurting all over. Actually, what you described made my think of my reaction to my first Zometa infusion last November. While what you described could be a virus, it could also be so many other things. A trip to urgent care might really be worth your while. I find that just hearing that it's " something going around" or not a particularly big deal can really help with the stress and anxiety that I can experience at home, just "waiting it out". Please keep us posted.

    Also saying hello and Happy New Year to all! I've been reading, following along, and feeling for people, both happy and sad, but have not been able to comment or share due to my own stuff. I do care and enjoy following what's going on with everyone, but this just hasn't been my month.

    Here's to a Happy and Healthier ( much healthier) year ahead for all of us!

  • sunshine99
    sunshine99 Member Posts: 2,723

    I totally get not wanting to go to Urgent Care or the ER. I would probably NOT have gone to the Health Express yesterday, except that I needed to go to the lab for a blood draw and the HE is right across the hall. I'm glad I went. Negative for COVID and pertussis. RSV still pending, but I do have an ear infection for which I'm taking antibiotics. (I realize I posted this above…)

    Stay safe out there!

    Carol

  • threetree
    threetree Member Posts: 1,753

    Shana - Sorry I seem to have misunderstood a bit. Went back and re-read and realized my initial take on your situation was skewed. If your onc team can help, that's great, I just know that if I called mine with the same issue, they'd just tell me to go to the ER. I really dread the ER myself, and can understand your wanting to wait to see the oncologist. Take care of yourself, feel better soon ( so you won't have to talk about it at your appointment next week), and whatever you find out, I hope it's not a by deal and that you have a very speedy recovery.

  • shanagirl
    shanagirl Member Posts: 446

    @threetree I think I was hit with a bad virus, the episode started right after I had my coffee. The caffeine must have shot the virus right through my system with the severe chills and shakes and weakness. I’ve been wiped out ever since with body aches random cough and nasal congestion nausea no appetite, just totally exhausted, so I know it’s a winter virus. this morning I took an Epsom Salt shower to feel better and went to my dentist for a cleaning appointment. made it through that. So I’b be seeing my onc next week and have my injections. So all is relatively normal today.😊.

  • shanagirl
    shanagirl Member Posts: 446

    @micmel you are too funny. I love the way you got pissed at cancer and called it a “hairy a**hole” 😂

  • sondraf
    sondraf Member Posts: 1,691

    Sunshine, I got an ear infection last month with the first virus, hadn't had one of those in decades! I'd be curious to hear if you come back RSV positive as I've been wondering if thats what I've got/had. I don't even know who tests for what anymore here, that would have to be explicitly requested I guess.

    I'm also still coughing but its pretty dry, just annoying. The mucous stickiness is something else for sure though. Like Shanagirl I need to call this in just in case tomorrow morning though my oxygen sats are good.

    In hip news I was able to get on the big exercise bike for a minute today.

    Pretty much just keeping to self at home these days because its storm after storm lately. Hoping to use this month to rest up and get things moving in the right direction!

  • cookie54
    cookie54 Member Posts: 852

    Shanagirl Hope you get your stamina back soon and feel much better. Just be careful as your body is always going through a war with all this!

    threetree Thinking of you and hope this month and year is a better one!

    sondraf Glad to hear you were able to exercise your hip. Yep one day one minute at a time.

    sunshine Yipee for approval of Rads,let's get the show on the road! THope the ear infection isn't too uncomfortable. Thanks for the insight on the rbc, mine are low with the sense they are being destroyed, MO said yesterday we will monitor closely.

    Mel Hope your mouth has shown improvement also thinking of your mom today. Sending hugs. Agree with shana I love your cancer name calling… cracks me up!

    Treatment was fine yesterday but I will miss a lovely woman that I often spoke to . However I am happy for her that yesterday was her last treatment and I got to see her ring the bell. Can't help but to feel a little sad as I picture myself sitting there watching others move on. That was me a couple years ago until cancer struck again… oh well this is the only life we have to live right..? We are all dealt a different hand in life.

    Thinking of all here and wishing all a peaceful day.

  • micmel
    micmel Member Posts: 10,057

    Cookie~ this morning I got the dreaded call that my mother had passed away this morning. I am in shock and it’s really a painful raw feeling that I don’t want to face. I have lost my sweet mother. I feel so alone and empty. Without just knowing I could talk to her and hear her voice. I already miss her dearly and cannot focus on much. I really appreciate you asking about her. I loved her dearly. And will never stop.

  • sunshine99
    sunshine99 Member Posts: 2,723

    Shanagirl, I hope you’re starting to feel better. What is an Epsom salt shower? I’ve taken baths, but not used them in the shower. I know when I had a bad bug several years ago, I was totally exhausted and had no appetite. It took me two days to eat one piece of toast—and believe me, appetite has never been a problem for me.

    I was negative for RSV, too, so I guess I just have a bad cold. Ear is still plugged, but I think the antibiotics are helping.

    I was able to talk to the radiation scheduler and I’ll have my first session this afternoon/evening. My RO isn’t at that location on Mondays, so I’ll see him today and get my first session. I figured it would need to be five back-to-back days, but apparently not.

    Sondra, I hear you on the annoying cough. I’d definitely call or go into a walk-in clinic. I wanted to make sure mine wasn’t going into pneumonia. It was “nice” to get tested for COVID, pertussis and RSV as long as I was there. PA ordered a chest x-ray which showed some stuff we knew was there. They forwarded it to my MO, PCP, and pulmonologist, all of whom agreed that it appeared stable but would continue to monitor on future scans. I’m glad your O2 sats are good. I monitor mine as well. I found a pulse oximeter that syncs with my phone, so that I can see my history. I don’t think it was very expensive although it can be a little finicky.

    Oh, my dear, sweet mel! I’m crying for you right now. You will NEVER stop loving your mom. I wish SO much that we were all there with you to wrap you in hugs.

  • threetree
    threetree Member Posts: 1,753
    edited January 4

    Mel - Oh does my heart ever go out to you! I'm just so sorry to read about your mother. I can relate to every feeling you have described, and even though my mother has been gone for 16 years now, I can still feel it, exactly as you have described. I was 55 at the time. I think the only advice I can offer for such a terrible loss is the old cliche, "The only way out is through". You really do just have to take it moment, by moment, day by day and so on. It sounds like you had a wonderful mother and that you were so lucky to have her for as long as you did. I also know that you have family and family is totally "where it's at" at a time like this. I remember feeling so, so very close to my father and brother at that time, and it was what really helped me get through it. We were all in it together and shared a very similar deep, deep, inexplicable loss. It does get easier over time, but there is always that special feeling, that special place in our hearts for our dear, dear mothers. I want to offer my most sincere sympathies to you especially, but also to all of your family, and all of those who knew and loved your mother. Peace and hugs to you, Mel.

  • candy-678
    candy-678 Member Posts: 4,175

    Mel- I am sorry to read of the loss of your mother. I lost mine 10 years ago and I still have dreams with her in them. But the pain gets less over time. I have good memories of her. She was the best cook!!!!

  • intolight
    intolight Member Posts: 2,390

    Mel, my heart hurts for you for the loss of your mother. I pray for peace and comfort as you go through this mourning. It is never easy to lose your mother. Hugs!

    Holding all of us who are going through this latest virus crud. Praying for rest and healing.

    Carol, praying for you as you start your radiation procedures.

    I am thankful I made it through my PT and labs today. Starting to snow, so I put chicken tortilla soup in the crockpot. Dinner is done! Faslodex shots tomorrow 😞

  • chicagoan
    chicagoan Member Posts: 1,064

    Micmel-I am so sorry. May God bring you comfort and peace during these difficult days.

  • cookie54
    cookie54 Member Posts: 852

    Mel I'm wrapping you in a big virtual hug, I'm so sorry. I understand the huge hole in your heart as I lost my mom when I was 32. It's a void that is never quite filled and you just have to hold on tight to all the wonderful memories.

    Those we love don’t go away, they walk beside us every day. Unseen, unheard, but always near; still loved, still missed and very dear.

  • goldensrbest
    goldensrbest Member Posts: 733

    Dearest Mel - my deepest condolences to you and your family. May your beloved mother rest in the arms of the angels. My wish is that your pain be replaced with the comfort of all the wonderful memories you shared with your mom. She will always live on within you. 🤗

  • molliefish
    molliefish Member Posts: 650

    oh goodness Mel, I am sorry to hear about your Mom going. I quoted three tree because this says it exactly like would. I lost my Dad and even as a police officer I know how much of a shock it is. They are here and then… they aren’t, and there isn’t anything we can do to prepare for that as much as we’d like to believe we can. Xoxooxox

  • mkestrel
    mkestrel Member Posts: 180

    My condolences to you and your family Mel.


  • sf-cakes
    sf-cakes Member Posts: 618

    Oh Mel, my heart hurts for you. Sending you love and prayers, for you and your family, and may your mother's soul be at peace.

  • irishlove
    irishlove Member Posts: 588

    Mel, dear sweet Mel, I am so sorry for the loss of your Mama. Grief knows no limits. But there is a promise of a tomorrow when you will smile thinking about a memory and the tears will lessen. I will pray for your whole family, sending love to all.

    Laurel

  • seeq
    seeq Member Posts: 1,173

    Mel - I am so very sorry thaat you lost your mother today. Even though it was expected, the pain is the same. It will be 20 years, this month since I lost my mother, but she is still frequently in my thoughts. Prayers for peace for you and your family.

  • moderators
    moderators Posts: 8,643

    Mel, we extend our deepest condolences to you and your family during this difficult time. Sending love.💕

    The Mods

  • wren44
    wren44 Member Posts: 7,932

    Mel, Sending hugs and a shoulder to cry on. No matter when you lose your mother, it's always too soon. Eventually the good memories help crowd out the sorrowful ones. Condolences to you and all who knew and loved her.

  • keris113
    keris113 Member Posts: 45

    Mel, I am so sorry for the loss of your mom. Sending thoughts and prayers ❤️