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Topic: STEAM ROOM FOR ANGER

Forum: Mental Health: Because Cancer Doesn't Just Affect Your Breasts — Meet and support others who are affected by these issues around anxiety, depression & other emotional effects.

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Posted on: Jul 16, 2015 09:21AM - edited Aug 1, 2017 10:46PM by sas-schatzi

Posted on: Jul 16, 2015 09:21AM - edited Aug 1, 2017 10:46PM by sas-schatzi

sas-schatzi wrote:

This thread is meant to be for RANTS and RANTING. Then Rant again. We need a place to simply get rid of the anger. Write it here. Unleash it all. Get it out. This isn't meant for the Stupid comments(great thread). This is for the gut wrenching, tell them off anger.

IMPORTANT: When done ranting don't necessarily stick around. Toxic. Drop the rant and find a better thread.

Only rules: Please, follow them as the Mods will shut it down in a heartbeat( waving Mods)

1. Be careful to not mention docs, nurses, hospitals by name. Defamation and all that tedious legal stuff

2. If it's caused by someone on BCO, just don't mention their name. I think the exception will be if someone is stalking you, blow their anonymity wide open. A stalker doesn't deserve politeness.

3. If you think the rant is about you, let it go, they're no names. Don't take it personal. This is the steam room.

4. If they're is a fight, don't expect the Mods to moderate, it was your choice to come here.

5. After writing a rant, do nothing more, re-read at a future time. Decide if it's important enough for you to cut and paste the rant to whomever caused you the anger. It's a choice. Sometimes it needs to be done, but remember they're can be fall out.

6. ######## pound those keys, SCREAM(caps), J*&R$WSDF&(swear)

7. Religion and politics discussion should go to those topical threads. IF their is something that impacts cancer, it belongs here.

I will revise topic box as needed-sassy

For puking and the color works pukeewogh

Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out shouting "holy crap....what a ride".
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May 15, 2022 04:08PM exbrnxgrl wrote:

thank you nopink. As the years go by, I feel increasingly irrelevant here. Old school tx and, except for one life threatening complication, I’ve have an easy time compared to most. I even like my medical team, though my long time mo had the nerve to move back to her home country 😉. I did recently experience a terrible coverage snafu with Medicare blaming my providers and my providers blaming Medicare. It appears to be resolved but it hurts my head to think about it.

You know that I also feel helpless. My fondest wish is to figure out why I have done so well. Then I wouldn’t feel so helpless and irrelevant here. I should also say that I am struggling more emotionally now than I was at dx over 10 years ago. I just see a giant clock always ticking down. It looks just like the clock of the time dragon from the set of Wicked. I know many are thinking, Oh, shut up and be grateful, but on the spectrum of feelings experienced by mbc patients, I think my feelings and circumstances are as valid as any.

Dx IDC, Left, 4cm, Stage IV, Grade 1, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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May 15, 2022 04:36PM harley07 wrote:

exbrnxgrl - you most definitely are not irrelevant here. Please keep posting as your insight and experience are valued. I’m sorry to hear about your emotional struggles but do understand the reasoning behind it. (((Hugs))).

RAD51D mutation Surgery 11/5/2020 Lumpectomy; Lumpectomy (Right) Dx 11/10/2020, IDC, Right, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 11/19/2020 Lumpectomy; Lumpectomy (Right); Lymph node removal Radiation Therapy 1/7/2021 Hormonal Therapy 2/8/2021 Arimidex (anastrozole)
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May 15, 2022 06:09PM edwards750 wrote:

My husband has BC/BS through his job. Thankfully I’m covered with that and Medicare as a secondary. When I was scheduled for 33 radiation treatments in 2011 we had already me our deductible months before. Thank God because we didn’t have $20-30k for those treatments.

People don’t understand or don’t care to understand that a BC DX includes treatment plans that can be very expensive but needed to save their lives. Ditto with meds.

Diane

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May 15, 2022 06:39PM chicagoan wrote:

exbrnxgrl-I always enjoy your posts-even when we have different viewpoints, I enjoy learning yours so I hope you keep posting. I hear you about that Big Clock ticking. Last week I went to a Zoom writing retreat with other women in their sixties and early seventies. We would get a prompt and then write for 10 minutes or so, then another prompt. For some reason, the exercises took each of us to a very sobering place. I wasn't expecting this at all-but it was a couple of hours of having to look clearly at my mortality and changes that may be coming to my life as I age. I think I was the only one with cancer but all of us were taken to this fairly dark place. The leader this didn't happen with another group she led a few weeks ago with the same prompts. I'm still glad I went-I think there were things I needed to look at that I may have been avoiding. So I am wondering for you if it is the cancer or mortality in general? Probably the cancer-before I had this I assumed I would live to my mid-nineties based on my relatives. I've known quite a few people who have died recently so that also contributes to the feeling of doom. One friend was just 57. I appreciate you sharing your thoughts and feelings. Most of the time I forget I have cancer-but I think after breaking my leg I feel much less invincible and more aware of the fragility of life.

edwards750-BC certainly can be expensive. I feel fortunate b/c my insurance has a cap on out of pocket expenses each year.

Dx 9/21/2016, IDC, Left, Stage IV, metastasized to bone, Grade 1, ER+/PR+, HER2- Radiation Therapy 9/26/2016 Hormonal Therapy 10/5/2016 Femara (letrozole) Targeted Therapy 10/26/2016 Ibrance (palbociclib)
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May 15, 2022 07:32PM moderators wrote:

Cyberhugs, and appreciation for all! Medicating

To send a PM to the Mods: community.breastcancer.org/my/...
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May 15, 2022 09:52PM tinkerbell65 wrote:

Thanks for the support, everyone.

Denny10 - Yes, 66 seems to be the age where a lot of people begin to think of themselves as "old." Only a few years ago, I would say I felt younger than my age, and assumed I would live a long life, like many in my family. Now, I feel I am facing my mortality, and need to think about the things I want to do "before it's too late."

sunshine99 - thank you for the virtual hug. Funny how a stranger, reading words online and saying they care, makes a difference. But it does.

alicebastable - Wow, you have been through a LOT. I had considered waiting a little while to have the surgery, but once two doctors said this could cause heart failure, the anxiety and the hypervigilance are just too much to contend with.

rah2464 , bcincolorado, kidi919, seeq, and everyone else - thanks for the well wishes. for the last several weeks my main concern has been staying safe from COVID, as that could interfere with my surgery schedule.

I do OK most days, but at night, it hits me - they are going to open up my chest and fix my HEART - and I"m just so sad about it. I know this forum is for cancer, not heart problems, but when I look up atrial septal defect, I find a lot of support for parents of infants with the condition. so thanks again. It helps just to type this out, and know that people care.

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May 15, 2022 10:52PM alicebastable wrote:

exbrnxgrl, I understand how you feel. My breast cancer was stage one, but so were the endometrial, skin, and kidney cancers. Do I count them as one big ol' giant stage one? Do I add them? Multiply them? Find their square root? Add in an aneurysm, and I don't know if I'm living under a huge thundercloud or if I'm the world's biggest hypochondriac.

Ignore treatment info (below) which is a BCO glitch. Do not enter personal information on this site since they grossly mishandled a data breach. Surgery 7/10/2018 Lumpectomy; Lumpectomy (Left); Lymph node removal Surgery 8/7/2018 Radiation Therapy 10/28/2018 Whole breast: Breast, Lymph nodes
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May 18, 2022 06:41PM bcincolorado wrote:

Just read online about someone 37 years who just died from this awful disease. So young and how sad. Hate cancer.

Dx 8/2009, IDC, Left, 5cm, Stage IIA, Grade 1, 0/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 1/1/2010 Mastectomy (Left): Nipple Sparing; Reconstruction (Left): Tissue Expander Surgery 1/6/2010 Lumpectomy; Lumpectomy (Left); Lymph node removal; Lymph node removal (Left) Hormonal Therapy 1/14/2010 Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone) Hormonal Therapy 1/29/2016 Femara (letrozole) Hormonal Therapy Femara (letrozole), Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone)
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May 21, 2022 09:28AM bcincolorado wrote:

Mad at big heavy snow that fell. Got about 8 inches out there. Did not stick where have to shovel but took out a big branch from the tree in the front yard and all over the front yard right now. Guess should be thankful did not fall on the house.Still snowing and can't even go move it out the way so DH can deal with it with a chain saw when he it is warm again at some point. It is almost summer right????

Also have 2 little grandkids which were to be 2 nights and now delayed because of snow so more stress and trying to entertain a 6 year old and 8 year old for 4 days it sounds like at least is harder. Love them but usually is it one night and they go home 2 max is hard. Now sounds like could be 4.

Dx 8/2009, IDC, Left, 5cm, Stage IIA, Grade 1, 0/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 1/1/2010 Mastectomy (Left): Nipple Sparing; Reconstruction (Left): Tissue Expander Surgery 1/6/2010 Lumpectomy; Lumpectomy (Left); Lymph node removal; Lymph node removal (Left) Hormonal Therapy 1/14/2010 Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone) Hormonal Therapy 1/29/2016 Femara (letrozole) Hormonal Therapy Femara (letrozole), Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone)
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May 21, 2022 03:27PM spookiesmom wrote:

yes, I saw it was 90 Thursday and Friday ALL THAT SNOWI couldn’t deal with those swings. People laugh at me for freezing at 65 but at least it’s not snowing.

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