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TIME TO CIRCLE THE WAGONS GIRLS
Comments
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Hi All,
I couldn't sleep so I decided to check on the circle girls. I am not awake enough to take notes but I did read a lot. It seems we are all experiencing similar feelings about EE.My girlfriend says to me I didn't know it could come back there!!What have I been trying to explain to you all these months?? My brother says: You have a good prognosis.You are only stage 2, Your cured right??? I think they think now that I am done chemo and surgery I don't have to worry any more. They really don't get it. I tried to explain to him again that there is no cure.Silence...then he says I am older so I will die first! LOL...my brother,always has to be one up on me. I can't stop laughing about it..gotta love them!!!
NS- I am so sorry you are having a bad time w/h recovery. I hope you are feeling better soon.
Sue/Gus- I know how hard it is to deal with our childrens suffering. If we could take away our son's pain we would.People always ask us how we deal with it. What choice do we have? We just try to give him all the love we have. We try to make his life as normal as possible and enjoy every moment we have with him.
I survivrd my first week back to work! Yeah! It does help to keep busy, my mind is not on BC all day. I wore my normal wig for 2 days,my red wig for one and the last 2 days I went natural. It's pretty short but my head is covered. The people at the train station really are confused!! I have a wedding today and baby shower tomorrow. Busy weekend but I need the circle girls so I will be back.
Love to all of you, Denise,Debc,Vicki,nicki, sheri, cheri,shel38,madison,Margaret,christinek....all of you!
Joyce0 -
It's Saturday! Still dark outside, but the birds are starting to sing. Its Spring for sure. Took a walk around the perimeter of the circle and things are quiet. Must mean many are still sleeping. The ground is a bit muddy from all the snow that has melted and the recent rain. Its quiet, except for the birds singing. A wonderful sound.
I didnt get home until 9PM - I was so gosh darn tired yesterday. The open house for the Supportive Living home was nice. Met alot of people. My older sister even came and it was great seeing her. When I got home, I went right to bed - and slept like a baby.
Of course the talk at the party was EE! Seems like everyone wanted to mention something about it to me. Amazing isnt it! How this has made many open their eyes and realize what bc is and what can happen.
Gosh last week-end was so busy with parties for St. Pattys Day. This week-end I dont have to do anything. I can stay in my jammies all day if I want.
NS: Your sounding better. I had a node dissection also and it was hard. But I remember the feeling of being relieved that the cancer was gone. Your recover has been longer than I expected, but you've had some complications and then no pain meds has made it even more difficult. I rmember I was taking Darvocet like it was candy. Here is hoping today is a better day.
Vickie: Oh what a nice thing to wake up to. That video was touching. Actually brought a tear to my eyes, but they were happy tears.
Gus/Sue: Im sorry you had such a rough week. Hoping things get better. I do agree with you. When I mention these boards to people, I get weird looks. They dont understand. Strange people who I have not met, yet feel so close to. Coming here gives me a sense of peace, everyday.
PurpleMB: I know my life has been touched and changed by all of you. I dont know how I would have gotten through surgery and treatment without you. Friends in my heart for life.
Amy: I agree, some of those reporters were making just plain stupid statements. But I did sit back and listen, whenever a doctor talked. Right now, I still feel sad for EE and her husband. Its too soon to go into denial land which is a very good place to be. I have to take blood pressure medication for life, but that is a whole lot different than taking chemo and/or hormones for life. And wheew! Glad you didnt go away.
Ishop/Sue: Sorry about your tests coming back with some abnormalities. Anemia can cause fatigue. Im guessing they want to do more tests to make sure your not bleeding anywhere. Good luck. Sorry to hear about your friend. And enjoy your visit with your very pregnant daughter.
Liz: City wide garage sell, sounds interesting. I would have the opposite problem with my husband. He is a saver. "someday Ill use that" "someday Ill wear that." My closet is filled with so many different sizes, I get lost now. Yesterday I put on a nice suit jacket. I thought it would be too small and tight, but it wasnt. I looked at myself and said I need to stop buying the big mama clothing. Im trying to hide my fat, but they actually make me look bigger! You also made me realize that closet cleaning time is upon us. Get rid of all those Winter clothing and bring out the Spring and Summer.
Vickie: When I was a little girl I used to get car sick all the time. Nate might need glasses. That is the #1 reason for motion sickness.
Sherloc: There is no way I could take care of 5 children and stay sane!! I would need a babysitter to help the babysitter.
Cheri: My goodness. I need routine in my life. Have to go to bed and a certain time and always wake up at a certain time. And if that schedule gets messed up, I get cranky.
Denise: OMG! A day with mom and the doctors and grocery shopping. I would for sure need a glass of wine when I got home.
Margaret: I stil feel like a kid, and act like a kid. But so many women here are so much younger than me. Its unfair I say, just unfair. At 57 I expect to start getting some health issues. At 37 I was on top of the world and strong as a horse. So it saddens me that so many young women are having to deal with this bc. As far as the pictures, well I dont know, I read something - that give me an idea and I type a word in, and get all kinds of funny pics.
Laura: Glad you MIL is adjusting well to rehab. That is exactly what I do. When someone like your MIL needs rehab, I go to the hospital, evaluate the person, talk with them and their family. Tell them what to expect, what to bring, and explain how therapy will go. By time that person gets admitted all the staff members already know what is going on in that persons life. We believe in treating the family, not just the patient being admitted. It is certainly overwhelming. Good luck with Tuesday, and hoping you can put it in the back of your mind for a bit this week-end.
CY: Sorry to hear about your dad and hoping the surgery goes well. This red had thing sounds like fun. I look good in red.
Joyce: Sorry you couldnt sleep. People really dont get what bc is all about. So when a story like EE comes out, it brings the facts into the open. Seems like my DH and friends are much more worried about me now. Hoping you have fun at the baby shower tomorrow.
Vickie: Where is my sunshine sister? Wake up I say. Wake up!
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OH CRAP...had a really lonnnggg post and posted to everybody and lost it!!
Nicki...you beat me up this morning! I've been dozing off and on since 4am and having weird dreams so decided to forget sleeping in and get up and see my sunshine sisters. Let the puppy out and guess what...MY MORNING DOVES ARE BACK! What a beautiful sound, spring has sprung.
Madison...Is you daughter staying a couple of days? Sending you and her warm hugs.
NS...Sick of you! NEVER...you are kicking butt and I am so sorry for the LE and clots. I am also happy you like your new look. Sending you lotsa love and hugs.
Karen...hope you are doing well...thinking of you this morning.
Shel...rant all you want. We all understand.
Ishop...sending you hugs. Hope things get easier soon.
Alwayshope...I used to go on Pogo all the time and had forgotten all about it!
Sue...glad the video made you happy...sorry about the tears though.
NS again...thanks for reposting the video..I was looking for it and it was just what I needed last night before bed.
Amy...good to see you. I'll see if I can "borrow" a new tractor for you later...found a great one too!
Joyce...hugs to you and Kevin this morning.
CY...prayers for your dear dad.
Oh my...forgot all I posted...darn...no time to go back as I have to hit the grocery store before it turns into a mob scene...I hate crowded stores!
Love ya all and I'll be back
Vickie0 -
Morning Nicki and Vickie and All, daughter is leaving Monday so we will be spending time with her this weekend. She went to visit another friend who lost his mom (age 48)Monday to a heart attack. All I can do is give her big hugs...
I will catch up reading the posts...I see that NS visited...HELLO!!
Hugs to All, dh wants to get back on the computer.
Madison0 -
Hi All
Been reading, but just haven't felt much like posting for some reason. Love to you all... Colleen0 -
Hi Girls,
I am just about ready to wrap up my arms so no typing until I take it off later.
I have a warmth on one side that is concerning me. I am hoping it will just pass. That is the radiated side and the PS told me that will always be the problem side.
I have another story about my sister.
She spoke to her BS in VA. Remember my sister had BC two years after me, small tumor no treatment other than a lumpectomy and I think a few rads- not the full course. You can imagine how much I respect her doctor for not being more aggressive when my sister had the same aggressive tripneg cancer that I did- only smaller.
Anyway- she told her BS about me. Her BS told my sister that I should be "praying I am her2+ because then I can take herceptin"- HUH??? Is that the dumbest thing you ever heard? YES herceptin works GREAT on Her2+ patients- but I don't WANT to be her2+ just so I can take a drug that will have no effect on the rest of my cancer.
Then she told my sister that she thinks my cancer "is no big deal and not something to get worried about." Interesting for her to make that determination without a path report in front of her.
And the kicker? I tested positive for an unknown variant of BRCA2. ALL my docs have been telling me my sister needs to be tested - not just for her sake- but it would help me because then they would have a better idea if this variant really did contribute to this recurrance. My sister's doc told her that "it isn't necessary for anyone to be tested for BRCA." and she "Certainly doesn't want to put my sister through that"
I pray no one here uses the same doctor my sister does in va!
Thanks for listening!
Love,g0 -
Ya know...they have great drugs to lower cholesterol now too. Should I be praying to have elevated cholesterol so I can take these wonder drugs??? NOT!
I think your cancer is a big deal. I think you need aggressive treatment. I hate that you had positive nodes. I think your sister might be in for a nasty surprise a few years down the road, I'm sorry to say. But there is always hope that she won't.
Of course, you really don't know exactly what your sister told that doctor about your cancer. Maybe she didn't tell the whole story??? Maybe your sister is afraid and that is why this is going on. If she can make your recurrence to be 'not that big a deal' then she will feel safe.
Edited to add:
Actually, I misspoke since you have a new primary and not a recurrence.
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Good Morning NS: I do remember your sister, and it sounds like she found a doctor that will tell her only what she wants to hear! I can imagine any onc telling someone to hope for her2+!
Sounds like both your sister and her BS are walking around in denial land.
Nicki0 -
NS, I am really upset by what your sister's onc said. I'm her2+ and couldn't take more than 6 doses of herceptin. Not everyone can tolerate it, so should I still be glad I'm her2+? What a dumb thing to say to a patient.
But, seriously, I am so glad you are posting a little more. I am always looking to see how you are doing. We really do love you here!
Tracey, I so feel for you with your dd! Right now it's my 15 year old son who is giving me fits. He refused to go to school again yesterday because he figured he was already failing all his classes, why bother. This after we went through all the hassle with the dr to get his wrist looked at, took him to physical therapy, and now, just didn't want to go to school! He only goes when it's to his advantage. The last couple of weeks were good, well he had stuff planned with his friends and knew he'd be grounded, so he went to school. This week, he didn't have plans, the girl he liked got back together with her boyfriend, he can't bowl because of his wrist, so why bother going to school? My dh is fit to be tied because they take you to court if you are truant here and the company my dh works for has a zero tolerance policy about that. He could lose his job! Does my son care? NO, it's not about him. He even had to miss the last day of bowling for this season when he has been the leader all year, but since he could't bowl, he was willing to just blow that off, too. I'm so frustrated! How have I raised such a SELFISH child? Now, this morning he's all sweet and remorseful and wants to go watch the end of the bowling to support his friends. Yesterday he could have cared less! Today he wants to get back on the computer and not be grounded. I'm so upset...I know I'm rambling. Tracey, I know my problem seems minor, but I just want to do what is best for my child, just as you do. I feel like such a parental failure. We've already been through so much with my older 2 (19 and 20) and the issues never end. My poor Micah (6) has to live with all this drama.
Madison, did I miss the results of your MRI? I called the neurologist yesterday and the nurse called me back to say he will discuss the entire results next Friday at my appt, but there were no significant changes at this time. I think that means no cancer, I'm sure that would have been significant.
Now that son is grounded from the computer, I may be around more this weekend (OH, NO!!!) You girls are the best.0 -
Sheri: Only 9 rounds of Herceptin for me!
Nicki0 -
Good Morning all,
I'm still reading post, but wanted to give a morning shout! Cy, Prayers for your Dad.
Vickie and NS: Beautiful video..and a great reminder for all of us.
I don't remember if I mentioned last night that I will be gone alot this weekend. I'll be back tonight (I think) and with in laws Sunday. I'll try to sneak in and read up on you tonight. But, If I don't get a chance to post, wanted you to know that I'm not Hiding..just not here!!
Love and Hugs,
Denise0 -
hi sheri,
omg no your not rambling on... i really can understand...funny how these teenage years turn our kids into aliens!!!!!!! have you tried a motavator for school if he goes and passes reward him with something he really wants??? i started to take the computer away from my kids....just got to remember to disable it when i am not home!!!!!
does your son not realize the consequenses if your hubby loses his job????? maybe you could take him to the police station and he can see first hand what he could turn into... sheri i will be thinking of you also girl....and hoping it all works out for yours and mine!!!!
hugssssssss
tracey0 -
Susanmcm: Come out, come out where ever you are. Have a nice bottle of pinot grigio and delicate good ol dago red wine. We can share it this evening!
Denise: Enjoy your day.
Tracey: Kids! If I had to deal with teenagers like you and Sheri, I would be a nutcase.
Nicki0 -
Good morning everyone.....well my daughters are at their dad's actually I should say they are at their dad's girlfriends house where he lives......you want to know something I really do like her....I met her at one of my daughter's concerts and she was so nice and pretty and she has two breast.......she had one son that died of cancer in his early 20's so I quess she needed another child in her life so she adopted my ex.................last night instead of going to the movies I decided to go to the mall.....we have a new mall just a few miles from my house that is that new European style that has a main streat with the stores facing this street with beautiful trees and bences where you can sit and flower pots,etc....anyway the weather here has been warm and muggy but there was a strong breeze and I love now that my hair has gotten long enough that it actually blows in the wind!!!!!!! I didn't buy anything but just did alot of window shopping and people watching.......Shel you were right....it did give me a sense of enpowerment being being by myself......I was alone but I did not feel lonely at all.....brb phone is ringing.......
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Well ladies...made it home from marathon grocery shopping and I'm wiped out! Whew. Won't have to go (hopefully) for a couple more weeks. Bought a new chain for the necklace my daughter got me so I feel so happy about that. I actually splurged a little and got a sterling silver one...woohoo. I also managed to somehow end up with a few (um 7) skeins of yarn in my cart. Don't know how they got there LOL!!!
NS...what a plain out stupid conversation you had with your sister. It sounds to me like her and her BS are both living in denial land. Sending you gentle hugs.
Tracey and Sheri...oh my. I always threatened to lock my daughter in her bedroom till she turned 30 but never had to. Not bragging but I have been truly blessed with two wonderful children and so far...no trouble. BUT...I was raised with 4 sisters and a brother. We are all different. I am the oldest and the calmest of the bunch, two of my sisters are very much like me, one sister is a selfish spoiled brat, one sister I don't care to even mention and my brother has been in and out of trouble but would give you the shirt off you back if asked. He has some pretty big anger issues. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I don't think it's anything you are or aren't doing. Each child has his or her own personality, their own set of issues and their own way of looking at things. My mom always said...you can only do the best you can and pray for the best. You two are obviously doing the best you can so relax a bit. I think kids today are under an incredible amount of stess compared to the stress's we had as kids (not to mention the stress of mom with cancer). With great moms like you I'm sure they will turn out just fine and dandy (if you have the patience to wait that long LOL).
Madison...glad you have your daughter for the weekend just sorry it's under such sad circumstances. Sending you both more hugs.
CY...hugs to you too.
Speaking of daughters...Sarah is finally going to get the infected, impacted wisdom tooth out. After four months of running around getting new test done for her bleeding disorder. Her appointment is April 11th. I am a wreck about it and wanted to go to Florida to take care of her and make sure she is ok afterwards. Our local airport had a special from here to Florida for 99.00 so I decided to check and fly down...well...spring break strikes again! The cheapest tickets available are...get this...641.00!! 1282.00 for me and Nate to fly to Florida...I DONT THINK SO!! I was shocked. Hopefully her wonderful (dripping sarcasm)hubby will stay with her and make sure she's ok and not bleeding too much. I would drive it but its 1100 miles and there is no way I could do it.
Hugs all around...love ya all and I'll be back...might take a quick nap as there is a play at the school tonight that Nate wants to go to.
Vickie0 -
That was my madre.....I don't know if anyone reads the "worst thing anyone said to you" thread but I really need to start the thread the "worst thing you have said to someone else".....about 2 wks ago my mom and I were talking (she is 81 and is healthy as a horse) and I causaly said "well you are going to probably outlive me anyway" and the second I said it I wanted to start beating myself in the head.....the look on my mom's face was just horrible.....anyway Sheri and Tracey I'm going to post later about the kiddo problems but first I have to put my 2 cents worth on NS's post......I simpley cannot believe that an Onc would tell your sister that it is not important to be tested for the brca gene when she has a sister that has bc and has tested positive for a type of it.....someone is blowing smoke up someone's butt...............I have a feeling that it is not the Onc....what about medical malpractice.......NS maybe your sister takes the cake in living in the denile land but come on.........my onc insisted that I have the test and I only had a 4 to 7 percent chance....it was a 2500 dollar cost and my ins. paid it my onc pleaded my case to them....they didn't have to do it...........sweetheart i don't know what kind of relationship you have with your sister but all you can do is warn her but if she chooses to think that she is safe then that is her choice...I assume you are reading posts but can't type try and check in with us later if you can........
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Oh shokk, your funny. NS? Might this be your sister?
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NS, I am stunned by your sister and her onc. I thought my onc was bad, but he takes the cake!!!! I would STRONGLY suggest that she get tested for the brca gene. It's good to see you posting more. See, it's slowly getting better!
I didn't take notes. I've got a lot going on today, besides having a headache the size of Montana
. I am having one of my down-in-the-dumps days. I am feeling on the verge of tears, for no reason. I'll just sit in the inner circle for a bit and then get on with it!
Hi to everyone, Amy, Nicki, Vickie, Madison, Cheri, Deb, Joyce, Karen, Shokk, Shirley, Sheri, Laura, LauraB, Lini, Shel, Anne, Gus, Jeannie, RobinTN, Colleen, Puppy, and all the others I may have missed. Have a great weekend!0 -
Well, I went and had my 4 vials of blood taken this morning + the 2 they took on Tuesday and they're wondering why I have iron deficient anemia and I've been wondering why I'm so totally exhausted all the time. Usually, I am a type A personality and probably have ADHD. Oh well, we'll see -- love the waiting - NOT!
Gina, I absolutely love the video! I hope you're feeling better and so happy you love your new look. I'm a little envious cause a couple of years ago I had a boob lift and they looked high and mighty. Then I get BC, have a lumpectomy and feel like I'm missing half a breast. But hey, I'm here . . . BTW, where did you say your sister's BS got her medical degree? Just curious.
Madison, I'm so sorry to hear about your daughter's friend and hope you're holding her close.
Sue/Gus, I hope the rough road you're riding over gets repaved with newer, prettier, happier concrete. Seriously, I hope you are feeling better!
Sheri and Tracey, I think children from the ages of 11 through 19 should go and live in a bomb shelter or on a kibbutz. My son was so bad, nasty, delinquent and the lying . . . I felt as though I had raised a total failure or I was a total failure at raising him. Then he decided he wanted to go away to college - was he on drugs? I didn't even think he would get into community college, which amazingly he did. As the world turns, he buckled down, became a human being, graduated with an associate degree (with honors) and transfered to Rutgers and graduated at the top of his class. Then he went to the Police Academy (not the movie) and is now a police officer. Last night they had an awards banquet and he got 2 awards. The purpose of this rant is to let you know that there is hope.
Shel, We're all 29 in our mind. I cannot believe that this is my BIG 60 year. 40 seems so young.
lizws, Thanks for the support - I really do appreciate your kind words.
Shirley, You are amazing with all those kidlets! I have my 3 gds for a couple of hours and I am completely wiped out.
Denise, I took care of my dad for 6 years and food shopping was an all day, anxiety-ridden day. You have my sympathies.
Deb & Shel, your words regarding EE couldn't have been better said.
Nicki, 59 is old, but young in heart and spirit! Thank you for your support. Did I say I wanted my results today (LOL)? I spent a great night with my vpd. We went out to dinner and talked almost all night. I just love her so much and can't wait to meet my grandson.
Joyce, Atavan helps me sleep and I don't wake up with a hangover. Have fun at the baby shower tomorrow.
Vicki, I love the video, just in case I didn't say so before. An infected and impacted wisdom tooth extraction shouldn't be too painful. They will sedate her and then give her some powerful pain meds + antibiotics. I'm sorry you can't be there for her, the airfare sounds outrageous.
Jan, we all have our DITD days and we all cry, even if for no reason. Give yourself permission - it's okay.
To anyone I forgot, I'm sorry and wishing all of you a happy and healthy weekend.
Love, Sue0 -
Do you remember me telling you that I hate exercise? Well I did it again this morning. Sweating like a pig. And guess what? I still hate it.0 -
i found this out last night and still rotflmao.... well i had a drink with my neighbour and she told me this...
about a week ago my youngest went over to the neighbours to ask if someone could help her get her older sister out of the dog house.......... lol yep
when we got puppy i have a huge crate i was going to use so its sitting in the living room well i guess oldest crawled into it and my youngest locked her in and couldnt figure how to unlock it.. so she went to the neighbours our silly french man and he had to come over and get the kid out..... hmmmmmmmmmm sounds like a good place for her dont it?????
tracey0 -
Tracey: ROTFLMAO!!
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Just so you know Nicki.....I'm on to you........you may hate the "idea" of exercise but I think you are enjoying your a$$ off (literally) One of my favorite movie scences is Legally Blonde when Reese Witherspoon is talking "women that exercise release endorphines and endorphines make you happy and women who are happy just don't kill their husbands" So Nicki I think you got a bunch of endorphines running around you body and you are happy and you need to let your husband know that as long as you are exercising he doesn't need to sleep with one eye open.......
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Tracey, I can't believe your oldest daughter let the youngest talk her into that!!! Too funny!
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Well, I just got through wrestling my 11 year old dog into the vets for her yearly shots and check up. You would think this would get easier the older they get...but NO! I promise my next dog is going to weigh no more than 10 pounds soaking wet.
Rule #1 of pet ownership (okay, I'm making this up!) Never own a dog that weighs half as much as you do if you want to be in charge!
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Afternoon ladies,
well the idea of a nap fell apart. Darn...heehee. I just go a huge donation of yarn! 15 garbage bags full of nearly every color you can imagine!!!! I seriously don't know how they fit it in their car and I'm not real sure where exactly I'm going to put it soooo...if you need yarn to make squares let me know. I am buried! Yipppeee.
Ishope...I hate the waiting too. I think we all do. We should have a bill passed in Congress and signed saying that we get immediate results from tests! Gee...don't they understand that stress kills too. Not really worried about my daughter having the tooth extracted I'm just worried about the bleeding disorder she has. She has VonWillabrands (like hemophilia)and could very easily bleed to death as she has either type A or 1 which is the worst it can get. A little bump and she has a bruise, a little cut will bleed for days and take weeks to heal. Just scary all the way around.
Tracey...ROFLMBO...oh thats too funny. Maybe you should use that as punishment! Hmmm...sounds like younger sister has one over on older sister LOL.
Shokk...never seen that movie but now I want to!
Alwayshope...I have two german shephards and a shitzhu...my shitzhu is 12 pounds and he's really not much easier to handle when he wants to be a pain in the butt!!! Try carrying a squirming furry octopus into the vets office...not an easy task. Pretty funny to watch though.
oh my...I promised pictures and forgot till right now. I'll be back.
Love ya all
Vickie0 -
Shokk and Jasmania:
Vickie: Missed your nap did ya?
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Oh goody! I love pics....runs to get popcorn and soda...
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ok...ready set go...hope ya got your popcorn and soda Alwayshop LOL!
Nicki...I resemble that picuture!!
First is our dear furbaby in his favorite spot on the back of the couch...yes I'm tryin to work up the courage to post MY picture...be patient!
Ok...the new me!!! 130lbs, new hair and new boobs!! LOL
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Boo! I have been looking all over for you.
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